


0k: POV

by Scedasticity



Series: 0k [2]
Category: Homestuck
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-10-10
Updated: 2018-04-14
Packaged: 2018-04-25 16:43:44
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 297
Words: 89,274
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/4968520
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Scedasticity/pseuds/Scedasticity
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>(Mostly) request non-chatlog POV snippets from the 0k-verse. There will be spoilers all over the place here.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. ==> BE KARKAT [during Conscription] / ARADIA [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Feferi and Karkat's deaths.

==> BE KARKAT

There was actually a minute where you thought it was going to work out. They let you get quite a ways into your pitch for letting you go forward into the threshecutioners with your frankly fantastic scores, the teal regurestrictor looking rapidly back and forth between you and a palmhusk while the drones stood stolidly by, but they must just have been waiting for orders.

“So while I acknowledge my disgusting–” And then you stagger forward, and look down, and the tines of the drone’s fork are sticking out of your chest–

Your vision is swimming with spots, and you barely see the second fork coming.

You know it’s there, because suddenly you’re standing back at a distance, watching yourself crumple on the culling forks, watching the drones carry you away–

“Karkat!”

It grabs your attention more than it seems like it should, especially when competing for your attention is your body. You swivel around nonetheless, and see – Aradia and Sollux. Sollux looks sick. Aradia is looking at you.

* * *

==> BE ARADIA

Blood flies. Kanaya flinches. You swallow, and reach for the ghost.


	2. ==> BE OLIVE ADMIN JANNIN LEPSIR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Unprompted

==> BE OLIVE ADMIN JANNIN LEPSIR*

(*You still go by your hatchname because you are waiting for the PERFECT adult name to come to you. As an admin, you’ve seen a lot of stupid ones go by.)

“Aradia Megido, sir.”

The new kid is fresh from Conscription, eyes just starting to fill in, still jumpy around trolls a lot bigger than she is – if the squadron’s Bureau of Retermination HQ rated a viewport she’d probably be gawking. Some admins like to give the fresh meat a hard time, especially lowbloods, but you generally try to make nice with the little wigglers. If they remember you were nice to them when they were new and nervous, they’ll keep their pet ghosts out of your computer without being asked and rush their paperwork when you need it in a hurry. Besides, it’s not like being nice to them is a chore. They act less like there’s some hilarious joke you aren’t in on, and they generally go by their hatchnames and not the ever more ridiculous death-themed names the older necropaths always pick up (and then YOU have to register them).

“Bonebelt! C'mere, I need to borrow your… your… wossits… light balls!”

…Step one of being nice to the new kid is not introducing her to Officer Corpsepap before she’s even had a chance to unpack. “Welcome to the Bureau, Megido. Come on, let’s find you a block.”


	3. ==> BE HIC

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Condesce and Feferi aka Wh-Elk that was fast

==> BE HIC

The gill has spirit, you’ll give her that, and she’s not SLOW, but.

It’s not a very exciting fight.

You wait long enough to see the light go out of her eyes, because that hasn’t quite gotten old yet, then turn on your heel and leave. You’ve got betta places to be.


	4. ==> BE KANAYA [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: You weren't expecting much but...

==> BE KANAYA

You weren’t expecting much, but you’d hoped the weeks of fighting-on-land practice you’d helped her with would at least – prolong things a little. The introductory fanfare has barely faded, and the trumpets are up again as the Empress saunters out, leaving Feferi – Feferi’s body – bleeding on the pavement.

On top of Karkat, it… hurts.

Two new people enter the arena – a huge highblood, and a much smaller person in the same luridly green uniform as the jacket someone gave Aradia. You’re about to ask her if she knows what that’s about when the highblood–

Well.

You always thought that story about the Condesce having a whole ship full of the mounted heads of dead heiresses was an urban legend.

“Got her,” Aradia mumbles, and you finally manage to turn away.


	5. ==> BE SOLLUX [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sollux and the voices of his imminently doomed friends.

==> BE SOLLUX

*“…in the top twenty-five percent of scores, and that’s after the midblood penalty…”*

The voices have been a dull roar since you arrived at the conscription platform, people getting culled for stupid random things, and you’ve been ignoring them as much as possible to fret about your future (exactly what you thought it would be) and try to research AA’s (this may be your only chance ever to get into the Fleet net, you’re going to make the most of it). All the same, you’re pretty sure you notice immediately when KK’s voice joins the cacophony.

You freeze. “KK,” you hiss.

AA gets it immediately. “Come on,” she says, and then you’re pushing through the throng, adding a little zap when someone doesn’t move fast enough, listening to KK say something about an off-spectrum mutation – what the fuck – and–

You get there just as the drones strike and blood flies. It IS an off-spectrum mutation.

“Karkat,” Aradia says, quietly but forcefully, more demanding than anguished. At your puzzled look, she says, even more quietly, “Got his ghost.”

==> BE SOLLUX, A LITTLE LATER

You’re in the middle of a hurricane of allergy tests and wellness checks to make sure the shiny new helmsman won’t keel right over when they hookup the biowires when you hear another voice you recognize.

*“Thank you, Eridan. For everyfin.”*

This at least isn’t a surprise. You close your eyes on the cart full of needles and follow the rest of the Challenge, such as it is, in FF’s comments.

It’s over before they take the next sample.

==> BE SOLLUX, A WHILE AFTER THAT

You don’t hear Gamzee at all. Maybe it’s that he’s too far away, or maybe there’s not room to focus on anything but the navigational orders being piped into your brain. From what you learn later, you really didn’t want to.


	6. ==> BE GHOST!KARKAT [on the gunship]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Karkat and Feferi, talking (or not) amongst themselves as freshly-minted ghosts?

==> BE GHOST!KARKAT

You don’t really get a chance to talk to Feferi until Aradia turns you both loose on the gunship – too much hiding, before that. You’re a little afraid it will be awkward, but she doesn’t ask about your blood, and you don’t ask about her Challenge.

“How’s the ghost thing going for you?” she asks, laboriously loosening the rivets of the gunship captain’s recuperacoon.

“Better if I could get rid of these enormous gaping wounds. You making progress with that?”

“A little. It’s better when I don’t think about it. But then mine was – um – pretty clean.”

It’s weird, how her blood brought her status and wealth and respect and every privilege there is, except for how it was just as much of a death sentence as yours, and in the end she’s left with a cleaner death and a less mutilated corpse to show for it.


	7. ==> BE EQUIUS [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan's distracting hissyfit over Feferi

==> BE EQUIUS

This is of course completely right and proper and you would never dream of challenging the traditions of the Empire, but if someone WERE to consult you, you would say any event involving the death of someone of such lofty blood should be a more solemn affair, less – celebratory.

You’re glad Nepeta isn’t here for this. You’re also glad not to be standing next to Makara, in case he starts crying or vomiting again. But at least it’s over and–

“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!”

You’ve… never actually heard that outside a movie before.

“No! I PITIED HER! Fef! NOOOOOO!”

You do not look in Ampora’s direction, even when you hear ripping cloth. Some of the bluebloods around you are looking a little embarrassed.

“I never had a chance to tell her how I really fmmmph! Mmmph!”

You offer a silent thank you to whoever shut him up. If Ampora has any sense at all, he’ll do the same.


	8. ==> BE KANAYA [in the caverns]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya entering the brooding caverns and meeting the other jades?

==> BE KANAYA

It takes a few weeks before you summon up the courage to ask one of the senior novices if there’s any way of contacting friends in the Fleet. She tells you about scheduled data transfers, then gives you a measuring look, and leans closer.

“Of course, if you want to contact friends in the Fleet in a HURRY…”


	9. ==> BE ARADIA [in Bureau of Retermination HQ]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia meeting Officer Corpsepap (and realizing how she got her name) the first time?

==> BE ARADIA

After assigning you a block (your own block! tiny, but all to yourself!), Admin Lepsir leads you back to the central office. “Our local Bureau commander is Officer Bluemind, but… I’ll introduce you to her later.”

The necropath waiting by the desk shakes his head. “Might as well do it now. She has to find out sometime.” The ghost hovering behind him smirks.

Lepsir grimaces, but knocks on the inner office door. “Sir? The new recruit is here to report.”

There’s a long pause and some indistinct murmuring before someone calls, “Fine, come in!”

The office has everything it should have, but it also has a pile. A pile being shared by a vague-looking ceruleanblood officer, a stone-faced necropath, and an olive ghost who looks embarrassed but resigned. (There’s also a dead necropath poking around the desk, pointedly not looking at the pile.)

Lepsir stares at his feet. “Sir, this is Aradia Megido. Megido, this is Officer Bluemind.”

“Also known as Officer Corpsepap,” says the dead necropath at the desk. “For obvious reasons.” Lepsir doesn’t react to that, but the live necropath gives her a dark look and the olive looks even more embarrassed.

“I… uh… Reporting for duty, sir,” you manage.

“Yeah, great, they’ll get you settled.” Bluemind’s attention drifts inwards, and the live necropath’s attention switches jerkily to the olive ghost.

*“Blue,”* says the ghost, *“I wish you wouldn’t blow off your duties to talk to me. You could get in trouble.”*

Lepsir backs out of the office, and you hastily follow. The door closes.

“So,” says the necropath at the desk. “Now you’ve met Officer Corpsepap.”


	10. ==> BE NEPETA [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta and :((

==> BE NEPETA

You don’t need Equius to tell you that it would be dangerous to be too obviously upset over Karkat dying. (He’s a little worried you were already too obviously upset when you saw him – well, Equius and Terezi and Vriska and Gamzee and Eridan saw him and Equius about smothered you keeping you from seeing him – but Terezi seems to think it can be passed off as being upset over the existence of a mutant and/or being distressed by Gamzee’s breakdown.) So you don’t cry again. You don’t complain about how unfair it is. You don’t ask why an off-spectrum mutant is such a big deal anyway.

You do sit quietly with Terezi and Kanaya, the evening before midbloods get loaded up, and look off the edge of the conscription platform and don’t say anything. And when Vriska randomly wanders by with a bottle of Fleet-grade mead she picked up somewhere, somehow, and offers to share, for no reason, you all four drink a silent toast.

Three of you stop after a cup because you have basic survival instincts. Vriska stops after two because the bottle isn’t that big. Ceruleans aren’t loading quite yet, so hopefully she’ll have a chance to sober up.

You don’t want anyone else you know to get killed.


	11. ==> BE VRISKA [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska's thoughts on the execution?

==> BE VRISKA

People you know aren’t supposed to DIE.

Okay so you sort of maybe possibly tried to kill a few of them, but that was ages ago, give you some credit, you’ve figured out by now that you shouldn’t try to kill people when you’d ultimately prefer them to be alive. You even, like, apologized.

(Well you never gave Tavros a hard time when he was getting his robolegs calibrated and you made sure never to be feeding your lusus when he was at Equius’s, that’s as good as an apology, right? And you gave Terezi these awesome jeweled sunglasses you looted. Totally an apology.)

So now that you are doing your part not killing people you know, it is only fair that the universe do its part and not kill them either! But there’s Vantas! All… bloody and stabbed and cut up! And dead!

The color of the blood is noteworthy, maybe, certainly it’s unusual, but… whatever. Who cares. Not you. Stupid Karkat can have his stupid blood however he stupidly wants. Except he can’t, because he’s dead. And you can’t even make the ones who did it pay, because they’re drones, and if you attacked drones and got killed everyone would laugh at you forever.

People you know aren’t supposed to die.


	12. ==> BE ANCILLAR SUREWAIT / THE ALTADONA OF THE BROODING CAVERNS / KEBELA ARTEMI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Jade attendants: Learn about Hope's death (Should be read after Kanaya interlude)

==> BE ANCILLAR SUREWAIT

You blame yourself. He walked right to his death. You ensured he made it out of the brooding caverns all those sweeps ago; you should have done more.

==> BE THE ALTADONA OF THE BROODING CAVERNS

You inform the subjugglators respectfully but firmly that displaying any piece of the mutant’s body in the brooding caverns would be deeply offensive to the Mother Grub. They back off. You’re relieved. The Mother Grub might or might not even notice it, but you know your people (for all you maintain plausible deniability), and it would be hell on work productivity.

==> BE KEBELA ARTEMI

You’re not A Believer. You’re politely skeptical about prophecy, you’ve exhausted your personal mysticism reserves in your reverence for the Mother Grub, which is where they should be, and even on your worst days the end of the world doesn’t sound like a good thing.

But you believe that the Signless Sufferer had some good ideas about caste and about how trolls ought to live, and you believe it has to be a good thing to have hope.

So when everyone learns there really was a Second Sufferer just as the Empire kills him, you silently join the new whimsical trend of incorporating something gray in your clothing, for anonymous mourning. You don’t ask questions when some of your seniors get more obviously distraught.

And when you learn all hope may not quite be gone (in an even more mystical way)… you mention it. Here and there. That “dead” isn’t always “gone”. That if you’re really going to have faith…


	13. ==> BE ERIDAN [alone]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: Number your losses.

==> BE ERIDAN

Fef’s dead. Kar’s dead. Kan’s left behind on Alternia and you’ll probably never see her again. Even Vris is out of touch. You don’t know what the fuck happened to any of the lowbloods, and you might be able to get in touch with Equius but you don’t really want to.

If highbloods didn’t get to bring their lusii, you don’t know what you’d do.


	14. ==> BE TAVROS [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: Drones inspecting you.

==> BE TAVROS

You make very, very sure to approach the platform away from any of your friends who might try to get in the way or taint themselves by association. Equius isn’t far away, though, watching to see what happens. He said he’s happy to explain the mechanical details of your legs if the drones are interested, but you really don’t think it will come to that.

You climb up to the platform.

A drone scans you, lingering over your legs…

It lets you pass.

You do NOT collapse out of relief. It would probably make the drones change their minds and decide you’re unsatisfactory after all.


	15. ==> BE ARADIA [first visiting the Unrelenting Persecution]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia: Meet a deceased helmsman

==> BE ARADIA

Skeleton (and you’re still more than a little incredulous a necropath ACTUALLY WENT BY SKELETON) advised you about policy on the way to the “Unrelenting Persecution”, so you’re not… surprised, exactly, by what you see when you follow Bonebelt and Skeleton-the-ghost into the helmsblock. There’s a ghost-helmsman against the wall near the vacant helmscolumn. Her arms below the elbow and legs below the knee are… they’re present, but partially obscured by a magenta-ish blur which is maybe a representation of biowires?

You guess there aren’t ghost biowires. Probably a good thing.


	16. ==> BE TEREZI [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: A peek inside Terezi's head towards the beginning? Especially any 'suitability' concerns

==> BE TEREZI

You know you can pass pretty much any vision test they’re likely to give you. You practiced. A lot. But it doesn’t take a lot of inspection to see your eyes are nothing but scar tissue, and you’re not sure if you can dodge a physical exam.

As it turns out, you don’t need to. You ace the written, shove your way through an obstacle course crowded with conscripts aiming for at least six different specialties, shoot a target with a dart gun, wrestle a hapless rustblood conscript voluntold to the ground without seriously injuring him – and submit a blood sample, to show you’re in the right range for a legislacerator. And that’s it. Physical qualifications are either performance or blood, apparently.

You’ll have to avoid the medicullers, in the future. And come up with an excuse to keep your eyes hidden all the time.


	17. ==> BE FEFERI [on the Gleeful Abandon]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Feferi: Ghost punch! Ghost punch!

==> BE FEFERI

You have to keep a hold of Gamzee. That’s not hard, he’s started clinging to you, too.

You have to keep control of your appearance. Fins are fine, goggles are fine, but keep up that big shapeless gray sweater to obscure the wounds if they come back or your shirt if you forget to keep your sign off it. You’re getting used to it.

You MUST NOT manifest a 2x3dent, even in this cesspool of fear and violence where your empty hand longs for a weapon.

You keep the hand busy punching people, so you don’t think about what you’d like to be holding.

And besides – SMACK – some of these guys – THWAP – need the punching – THUD – more than you need – BONK – a weapon. Ha, a living troll might’ve broken their hand on that last guy’s face, but not you!


	18. ==> BE TAVROS [at work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: Wrangle that alligator.

==> BE TAVROS

The maintenance position is supposed to be just the excuse to have you here, while you control lusii for the medicullers. But here you are with a maintenance team, trying to patch up a corridor wall, and there is a giant crocodile lusus, hot on the heels of one of your coworkers while the barbarrister cackles madly.

You duck around behind your largest coworker, even though he’s made his disdain for a cavalreaper washout plain. “I have beast communion powers. Make sure the barbarrister doesn’t see me.” And then you have to try to convince the crocodile that it’s not REALLY that hungry, that mauling that troll would be a lot more effort than it’s worth, maybe a nap would be a better use of time…


	19. ==> BE GAMZEE [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: How about one about Gamzees freakout?

==> BE GAMZEE

It’s already been a rough couple nights. You haven’t been able to get enough sopor to sleep in, much less make a pie, there’s strange people everywhere and they keep asking you where’s your lusus, you’re purple so you can bring your lusus, but you COULDN’T FIND YOUR DAMN LUSUS, and when you say that all the strange people look at you funny, and eventually Terezi told you just to say he’s a seagoat and too big, and that way they don’t look at you quite so funny, but you still wish they wouldn’t keep asking. And you were really excited to see there was a tent shrine for the Mirthful Messiahs, but it wasn’t what you thought it would be like, it was all about the parts that scare people, and those parts are miraculous too but your favorite miracles are the ones you can share with people and they don’t get scared. And even though there were fewer people there there were still too many people. So you’re following around people you know instead of trying to figure out what you’re meant to be doing.

And then there’s some sort of commotion, and a subjugglator is going to meet some drones, and–

“Oh shit,” says Eridan.

–thAT’s KARkat–

“What the–”

–he’s all STABBED–

“Is that his blood?”

–he’s ALL STABBed and nOT MOVING–

“Equius, let me go!”

–and the subjugglator pulls out a big knife and CUTS HIM MORE–

“What the fuck. What the fuck!”

–and cUTS HIM UP–

“Wwhat. Wwhat is going on.”

–and you want to DO SOMETHING but you can’t DO ANYTHING–

“No no no no no–”

–but Nepeta is CRYING, and you think maybe you can CRY–

“This is such overkill–”

–and you feel SICK, so maybe you can BE SICK–

“What’s the matter with Gamzee?”

–and Equius always wants to help you, so maybe he can help you not fall over.

Everything is terrible and nothing is okay.


	20. ==> BE ERIDAN [in training]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can you do something about Eridan being either a desk jockey or too good at kills? He did kill lususii and flarp, I bet that makes him kinda over powered.

==> BE ERIDAN

The stuff they’re teaching you – command and strategy and tactics and everything – is actually really interesting, though it’d be more interesting if you didn’t know a lot of it already. You are sort of wondering if you’re ever going to do anything BUT study.

You didn’t ask, too aware of your invisible probation to risk making waves. (You were just… really really upset.) When one of the others asked, the teacher offered a mildly condescending smile and the assurance that you’re seadwellers – you have plenty of time to prepare.

You won’t have plenty of time if you DIE OF BOREDOM, but you guess you can keep busy with your master plan to make everyone forget you were crazy flushed for the doomed Heiress. It’s about time to move on from flirtation to an actual red hookup, if you can find one.

At this rate you’re going to end up put off romance completely, but it’s not like Kar’s around to discuss it with, so whatever.


	21. ==> BE EQUIUS [saying goodbye]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: nepeta and equius saying goodbye?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This begins the second round of 0k POV requests, and you probably shouldn't continue until you've gotten through _share newws_ in the main fic.

==> BE EQUIUS

You jump up from your computer and go looking for Nepeta immediately. Depending on who’s prompting them, transfers can be frighteningly fast. It’s a good thing. If Colonel Overbear finds out she’ll be out of his reach before she actually is out of his reach…

You find her taking inventory of ammunition cases while an indigo officer stares into space failing to take notes. You offer a stiff salute before going to lift Nepeta down from the stack of cases.

“Equius?” she says. “I’m on duty…” She sounds only a little worried about that, probably because the officer looks only vaguely interested in any of this.

“Ampora is having you transferred to his ship,” you say, and then can’t say anything else. How can you explain-?

But you don’t have to. She knows already, you realize. “I’m so sorry,” Nepeta whispers. “I’m so sorry I have to go. I WILL find a way to help you.” She hugs you.

“No, just – take care of yourself. Stay safe. That helps me enough.” She can’t beat Overbear. Ampora can’t even beat Overbear, not head-on. “Goodbye.”

She makes a strangled noise and punches you, half-seriously. “Goodbye FOR NOW.”

If you have another chance to meet before she’s sent away, you’ll say goodbye again, and she’ll say goodbye for now again – but for now you have to go on duty, and take care no one notices anything unusual.


	22. ==> BE ONE OF THE LUCKY ONES

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Overbear checks out the new recruits for vict-, err, quadmates.

==> BE ONE OF THE LUCKY ONES

Colonel Overbear is surveying the ship’s new conscripts like so much fresh grubloaf, eyes lingering on a cerulean here, an indigo there, raise an eyebrow at a very high purple. They mostly don’t notice. The few who do only try to stand straighter and look fiercer, the normal response to inspection from a superior. They have no idea.

Eventually you’ll feel bad for them, you’re pretty sure, but right now all you can feel is relief. You’re not fresh meat any more. The hundred thousand things still out there ready to kill you are unlikely to want to pail you first.

All the same, you think you’ll keep the extremely unflattering glasses for at least another sweep. And there’s no need to cultivate any expression beyond an empty snarl. Brainless, unattractive, BORING Ruffiannihilator, that’s you.

(It probably wouldn’t have put him off if he’d ever actually been interested in you, but it makes you feel better.)


	23. ==> BE ERIDAN [not so alone]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: pick out the ugliest piece of jewelry, you don't want something Nepeta might actually accept. (Or do you?)

==> BE ERIDAN

The whole point is to NOT move the “relationship” along, but you still find yourself looking for something that Leijon at least won’t find laughable. Not that one, it’s just too horrifically saccharine. Or would she like that? Well, if she’d like it, you don’t want to give it to her either. Not this one, the color’s not quite right, and what kind of loser gives quadrant jewelry in the wrong color? Not this, it’s for long hair. You can’t give piercing jewelry to someone without the necessary piercings, you don’t even know why you got this. Too sparkly. Not sparkly enough. You should probably get rid of the tiara. WAY too sparkly. Horribly tarnished, what sort of low-quality shit is this. You don’t even remember buying this, you must have been drunk or something. Too crude – you got this one on a dare from Vris and would never give it to anyone. Slightly asymmetric. Just somehow ugly.

You settle on the hairclip, which isn’t totally hideous, and it’s useless to her so there’s an easy excuse to refuse it.


	24. ==> BE NEPETA [on the Magnificent Marine Predation]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: How about Nepeta bonding with the other yanked-in-by-seadweller conscripts on her ship?

==> BE NEPETA

You’re nervous about meeting your new colleagues, because you got grief in your old posting over getting there because of your long-established moirallegiance. You don’t want to know what security on an even more prestigious posting will think of a fresh olive conscript shuffled in because of a new flushcrush.

But after you report to your commanding officer, he hands you off to a friendly-looking (though that doesn’t mean friendly) teal with a large parrot-lusus on her shoulder.

“Hi, I’m Backwing, and I’m here to ask all the awkward questions,” she says, with a possibly genuine smile. “Tell me why you’re here.”

“Um,” you say, not sure how much to say. “Well, my transfer was requested by, um, by Eridan Ampora? I sort of knew him back home – I mean, on Alternia – we had lots of friends in common–”

Backwing scribbles some stuff on a tablet. “So it’s not an established quadrant, then? Too bad. But you do know him, and he’s your age – that’s good!” She pauses. “That is good, right?”

You’re not sure how you’re supposed to be playing the quadrant thing with Eridan. “It’s… not bad?”

“Sometimes that’s good enough.”

Backwing introduces you to the rest of the low-level security people, about a third of whom are fresh conscripts. You aren’t the lowest color – there are several other olives, two yellows, and a very nervous rust. There are seven people posted here with seadweller moirails, five matesprits (or red quadrant interests), six kismeses (or black quadrant interests), and one resentful purple who’s the auspistice between two seadwellers. Not all of them are very happy about it.

“We have a donation jar for the Drink About Our Quadrants cabinet,” one of the kismeses says. “Welcome to the crew.”


	25. ==> BE SKELETON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: So how much do dead necropaths know that they dont tell at least the top living necropaths?

==> BE SKELETON

Being alive is really hard. You try not to put unnecessary pressure on them by telling them things they don’t really want to know.


	26. ==> BE GHOST!GAMZEE [at Bureau of Retermination HQ]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee pov? Some insight on how he's coping?

==> BE GHOST!GAMZEE

There’s kinda a parade of ghosts going through Aradia’s tiny little block, and they ain’t very happy ghosts either. You spend a lot of time out in the Bureau of Retermination lobby with Skyflare. She’s pretty chill. Sometimes she tells you about the smaller atmosphere-capable flight vessels she used to test before she blew up.

Once upon a time you’d have described Skyflare’s flying stories as miraculous. But you’re not really sure about miracles these days. None of the stuff you believed in worked out for you, and you’re still trying to decide what that means to you. (Especially since you’re, you know, dead. The rules change then, right?)

…Actually, no, there was some stuff you believed in that worked out, even though you didn’t expect it.

Your friends came and got you, past when you ever imagined it was possible.

Whatever you believe now, it’s going to be built on that.

(And maybe some on the things Surepain told you, back on the bad ship. The Sufferer had some good ideas. But all that makes Karkat really uncomfortable, so you’re not gonna mention it until you’re a lot surer about it.)


	27. ==> BE A SURVIVOR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we hear from the ones that lived/got away? Nepeta said that there were a few right?

==> BE A SURVIVOR

You don’t… feel much like a survivor.

You don’t feel like much of anything, honestly. But you are starting to feel… relieved? You’re starting to feel not apathetic that you’re not dead. (You keep quiet about it. Now that you can think about it, it’s probably because you stopped caring that he didn’t drop by the mediculling bay when you recovered from the cracked skull. It’s probably why you were in the mediculling bay with a cracked skull and not the corpselocker with a caved in head.) (He’s PROBABLY not watching you, he switched his focus to (killed) Leybar and now he’s hunting the fresh meat. But you think you’re going to feel like he’s watching you for a long time.)

If you were teal or even cerulean, your dramatic performance drop probably would have earned you some nasty consequences. But you’re indigo. So they washed you out of the archeradicators into ship security, and nobody seems to care that you’re not very enthusiastic about it. Because you can’t muster up any enthusiasm even now.

But the little olive’s cat puns made you smile a little, because cats are the best (and your lusus is so big and wild the ship would have been miserable for her even though she would technically have fit, so you left her on Alternia and she’s FINE, your mom is fine, he never touched her). So you muster up the energy to mention a few things the highblood rumor mill wouldn’t tell a midblood.

She feels so hard, it would be a shame for her to stop feeling.


	28. ==> BE GHOST!GAMZEE [on the Gleeful Abandon]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee: meet Surepain

==> BE GHOST!GAMZEE

It’s really LOUd here and the people are aNGRY and SHOUTING and SCREAMING SCREAMING SCReaming and it’s some of the live ones who everyone pays attention to, but it doesn’t stop when you’re dead, it nEVER STOPS. And you can still hear the little brownblood crying crying crying because you’re poison and he can never get away from you and you can never get away from him, because you’re poison and you’re FILTHY and EVERYTHING’S FILTHY and the chapel isn’t full of miracles it’s full of POISON and BLOOD and that blood, you sAW THAT BLOOD SPILLED, IT WASN’T SUPPOSED TO SPILL, IT WASN’T, IT WAS WRONG–

A hand catches yours before you can try to hit the wall again (your fists should hurt but they don’t hurt except everything hurts), and it’s strong enough to hold you back, but it doesn’t make things worse. “Easy there,” someone says. “Now what’s that about?”

You could try to explain about Karkat and unmiraculous miracles and your lusus and everything, but you can’t find the words, so you just say, “None of this should MOTHERFUCKING BE HERE.”

“Yes,” says the stranger. “That’s true. You’re right. None of this should be here, all of it is wrong. That’s the thing we need to understand the most. And we’re not the only ones to know it.”

He sounds… really solid about it. And he’s not screaming.


	29. ==> BE GHOST!GAMZEE [on the Gleeful Abandon]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ghost!Gamzee: Reunite with Ghost!Karkat and/or Ghost!Feferi?

==> BE GHOST!GAMZEE

Sometimes you like to hide out in sopor storage even though you can’t make pies anymore or sleep in it or anything. It just… makes you feel better. Even though the brownblood is still crying and you’re still poison. (You’re not wrong to think it’s all wrong. You’re right to think it’s all wrong.)

And then someone skids in the door in a cloud of wild hair, not screaming, not crying, and SMILES at you. “Gamzee! There you are!”

It takes you a minute to process it, because she doesn’t have her sign on, and she’s not wearing any bright colors, just a big drab gray sweatshirt and a long drab gray skirt, and her smile isn’t as bright as it was, but she has the same fins and the same goggles and the same hair and the same horns and she IS smiling. “…Feferi?”

“Yes, it’s me! But we’re trying not to use my name too much in case someone knows it, I’m not supposed to still be around.” She glances over her shoulder quickly, then holds out a hand. “Can you come with me? Aradia’s waiting in the helmsblock. We’re going to get you out of here.”

You look at her hand. It’s… clean. “I’m poison. Everything’s wrong.”

She bites her lip. “I… can see why you’d feel like that, here. But we want you to come back with us. Me and Aradia, and Karkat and Sollux and Tavros and Terezi have all been worried about you, too.”

“Karkat? Karkat’s dead.” Oh, wait. “You’re dead. I’m dead?” You guess if you’re dead it’s okay to go with them? You nod at the little brownblood. “He has to come, too, cause I’m poison.”

She gives the little brownblood a… kinda confused look. “All right. Let’s go.”


	30. ==> BE THE UNRELENTING PERSECUTION / SOLLUX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Maybe Sollux adjusting to being a Helm?

==> BE THE UNRELENTING PERSECUTION

No, fuck that.

==> BE SOLLUX

AA is okay. She’s okay, and KK and FF are as okay as possible while being dead, and your program to set up the dropbox worked perfectly. And you can access the computers without getting zapped by anything. Good. That’s good. Everything is okay.

You back out of the dropbox and erase the evidence. They drilled you enough that you barely have to think about doing it with your brain. With your psionics you could even do it without the…

…biowires…

…which are probably not actually WIGGLING…

…much…

Fuck.

The sooner you can tune all the physical sensations out, the better. It shouldn’t be THAT hard. You did it all the time before, and there weren’t any automated systems looking after your health then. This is just some discomfort.

You need a distraction. Fine. You’ll try direct visual input from the cameras to survey the helmsblock, since it’s not like you can see with the rig on your face.

They drilled you on this, too. It doesn’t take too long to activate the things and pick out the ‘0u0’ on the floor.

Yeah. You’re going to be fine.

And that twitching is almost certainly your imagination.


	31. ==> BE NEPETA [on the Magnificent Marine Predation]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta, what are your thoughts on the hairclip Eridan's offering? Is it actually as awful as he thinks it is?

==> BE NEPETA

You look at the hairclip. It’s very… violet. And heart-shaped. And shiny. And kind of sparkly. It’s… pretty? You guess? You don’t have a lot of experience with jewelry.

Your colleague Jorjel looks at the hairclip. “Hey, that’s not bad. Hesten got these ridiculous bracelets that look like they should have chains attached. GOLD chains.” She frowns. “Not sure how it’s supposed to go in your hair, though. Maybe he means you should grow it out?”


	32. ==> BE KANAYA [making connections]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: Recount your nightly activities. Have you made contact with your friends yet?

==> BE KANAYA

Reshki isn’t assigned to – or allowed in – the Inner Caverns. She’s not quite the right shade. You wouldn’t approach an Outer Caverns attendant on your own – a lot of them tend to be a little bitter. But she’s Artemi’s moirail, and when Artemi gives you an introduction laden with SIGNIFICANT HINTS about helping you get in touch with your friends in the Fleet, Reshki just rolls her eyes.

“She can be so weird sometimes,” she mutters, after Artemi leaves. “What the fuck is that even about? All right, I assume you know who you want to send something to? It has to be someone who won’t turn me in, and they won’t be able to respond unless they’re good with computers – do you know someone good with computers?”

“Yes–” And he’s powering a starship right now. Reports of how much interaction helmsmen were allowed were wildly inconsistent. “…Maybe.”

Reshki sighs heavily.


	33. ==> BE EQUIUS [earlier on]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius: meet Overbear

==> BE EQUIUS

The officer who visits the diningblock looks like everything a highblood should be: tall, severe, serious, and intimidating. You’ve started sweating even before he says you’re a fine example of your class.

But there’s still something a little… off about the whole interaction, a little weird, and it’s not just the way he casually mentions he could get your moirail a transfer if that was desirable. Somehow you’re not surprised at all when a cerulean dryware tech two sweeps ahead of you whispers that, if you can manage it without giving offense, you might not want to bother Colonel Overbear, especially since he’s probably still mourning his last kismesis, it was so tragic, she was even younger than me, no one was expecting it.


	34. ==> BE INQUISITORMENTOR SHARPEYE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sharpeye: what do you think about Terezi and her investigation of Overbear?

==> BE INQUISITORMENTOR SHARPEYE

Ah, to be young and idealistic.

And probably personally invested in the case. You’re not quite sure how – Pyrope guards her personal connections more carefully than her eyes – but she has something riding on Overbear’s downfall. Probably a friend in his target range. You hope she won’t be too crushed if – probably when – they’re killed.

Still, you really are impressed at the depth of cases she’s dug up. She’s probably found a back door into the cumulative database, but it’s still an impressive search job. You may actually pin the bastard down this time, eventually.

You hope so, for Pyrope’s sake as well as future conscripts on the ‘Brutal Domination’. She likes things to be fair, has a sense of justice in her head – you know the type. Inquisitorment isn’t the most comfortable place for that lot, but it’s one of the safest.

(You don’t consider yourself one of that lot anymore. You look out for you and yours. That’s all anyone can do.)


	35. ==> BE THE DEMONESS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Damara: Try to ruin the empress's day. Fail.

==> BE THE DEMONESS

You’ve been elsewhere in the Fleet for a while, breaking the brains of some highbloods, sending lesser ghosts screaming for their lusii, making people’s weapons explode in their faces, turning things inside out and enjoying the expressions on live necropaths’ faces when they arrive to fix the trouble and find out who’s causing it. Priceless. You announce your return to the battleship Condescension by launching the Empress’s latest pitch fucktoy across the commandblock, pinning him against the wall, and pulling his intestines out through his nose.

The Empress’s face LIGHTS UP. “Look who’s back! My best ghost enemy!” She sketches a little spade in the air.

You throw the corpse at her. She laughs.


	36. ==> BE ATTENDER VIGILANT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: theres bound to be some interesting scenes with Kanaya involving the fact her lusus was a virgin mother grub. Like maybe critiquing procedure from her experience?

==> BE ATTENDER VIGILANT

You do an embarrassing double take. “What was that?”

Ancillar Oncetold rubs her temples. You’re both tired, both mourning. “I said, how are things going with the Virgo who had the virgin mother grub lusus? She getting any grief from the rest of your lot? One of my brats actually accused her of lying about it before we sent the perfects further in.”

You grab your tablet, but of course it won’t sync properly with the caverns’ peculiar computer system and only has the information you put there. “She… hasn’t mentioned it, I guess. Um… Maryam or Arvaat?”

“Maryam.”

You should have known. Maryam’s been quiet, intent on learning her duties – not a hint of Arvaat’s euphoria over being perfect enough for the Inner Caverns. She already knew. “Huh. I wonder if she…”

You don’t finish, because Oncetold is an Ancillar, not an Attender, and as much as you trust her there are some mysteries that don’t leave the Inner Caverns.


	37. ==> BE GHOST!TECHNIST GRAYWIRE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: How does Officer Corpsepap's morail feel about her situation? Would she prefer to just quietly fade away?

==> BE GHOST!TECHNIST GRAYWIRE

If you wanted, if you really wanted, you could find Skeleton when none of the live necropaths are around, and ask her to dispel you. She would do it. You know she’d do it, because she told you she would. But you just can’t bring yourself to do it.

Part of it’s not wanting to leave Blue when she’s clearly still desperate for your company. But that’s not a good moirail thing to do, you don’t think. She’s hurting herself to see you and you can’t get her to stop. The good moirail thing to do would be to cut her off. Take yourself away to push her somewhere better for her.

But you want to keep existing.

You mostly don’t think about the possibilities, because then you’ll feel guilty for prioritizing your non-life over your moirail’s well-being and you’ll feel angry at Blue for putting you in this position. You just feel constant embarrassment, which is much more tolerable.


	38. ==> (HOLD YOUR NOSE, AND) BE OVERBEAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Overbear: Choose the sweaty hunk

==> (HOLD YOUR NOSE, AND) BE OVERBEAR

It’s not a bad lot this sweep. Could be better. Something about that girl looks familiar, but maybe–

Ah. So much RESPECT and DEFERENCE.

This’ll be fun.


	39. ==> BE TEREZI [covering up]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Terezi DRown in paper work, explain that "If i lick it it is mine" to bluff on why there is salve on EVERYTHING

==> BE TEREZI

“Fucking shit, Pyrope, the tablet is yours already! No one else is ever going to want it!” Skaree sounds purely annoyed, but something in her posture smells a little too interested in your response.

You’re almost exactly tied in courtblock performance ratings.

You grin, and lick your stylus. “I can never be too careful around you untrustworthy reprobates!”

And it’s not even a lie.


	40. ==> BE ERIDAN [not so alone]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: Convince your fellow recruits that you're infatuated.

==> BE ERIDAN

You can do this. You can look your peers in the eye and convince them you are flushed for an oliveblood.

…Actually you don’t need to look them in the eye.

You get out your high-quality paper and antique pen and work on a list of cat puns in public.


	41. ==> BE CERISS LYDACE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Maybe-Descendant: So, anything weird been happening lately?

==> BE CERISS LYDACE

You roll your eyes as your neighbor tries to convince her moirail that there is a ghastly subjugglator wraith haunting the deck. The moirail isn’t buying it. Your other neighbor suggests maybe it was one of the purple trainees with a mud mask for skin treatment.

You consider speculating that the hypothetical mud-mask-wearing purple trainee might have stolen your good yarn, just to watch everyone for suspicious reactions, but decide you need to look for it a while longer first.


	42. ==> BE TAVROS [at work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: OH god, it looks like someone overturned a bucket in this back hallway, regret becoming a janitor, . . . how is it on the ceiling?!?!

==> BE TAVROS

You look at the ceiling. You remind yourself this is better than slaughtering lusii. Even if it’s… There have got to be more than two colors in that. You’re not going to try to count the colors.

Tiblee looks at the ceiling. You’re not sure what he’s saying to himself, but he looks like he wants to cry.

Supervisor Takedown looks at the ceiling, and scratches her head. “Wow. Haven’t seen anything like this since the last time I had to clean up after one of the barbarrister parties.”


	43. ==> BE TAVROS [starting work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: Recall first day on the new job after being transferred from the Cavalreapers.

==> BE TAVROS

You knew you were in for a rough time when– No, you always knew you were in for a rough time. But it was confirmed when your new supervisor introduced you to your new coworkers with “This is Nitram. He used to be a cavalreaper, but the medicullers want him around here, so don’t kill him or they’ll kill you.”

You woke up to someone trying to steal your robolegs. You kicked him in the face, hard enough to break his nose but no worse.

Then they assigned you to clean drains in the courtblock. One of them was clogged with a foot. A coworker offered to “give you a hand” and then did so.

Being a janitor SUCKS.

But you’re not murdering anything.


	44. ==> BE NEPETA [socializing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta: attend "Drink About Our Quadrants " night.

==> BE NEPETA

You’ve never been much of a drinker – which is to say you never had opportunity or desire back in your cave, and when the intoxicants first came out at the pre-Conscription… gathering… at Karkat’s hive, you ended up on top of the thermal hull drawing a totally illegible shipping grid on the ceiling, then chivvied Equius into joining Terezi’s sing-along, and the next time someone offered you a drink Equius broke the table hurling himself across the block to intervene. But you take the bottle offered to you, and hope you won’t be expected to drink too much – or say too much, you’re not sure how much you can get out of the hairclip.

You seem to be safe on the talking front, at least. Briate, the sole purple in your group, is on a tear about how he is SUPPOSED to be in command training, but NO, CERTAIN PERSONS cannot even let him go to another SHIP lest they fuck each other to death, does no one have any self-control, any, ever…

Jorjel leans over to whisper in your ear. “He does this every time. But he does spring for the good stuff – try it!”

It tastes… sweet. Extremely sweet. You force down another sip, and mumble something about not being used to this.


	45. ==> BE A HELM TECHNICIAN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Helmsblock technician: Be very confused.

==> BE A HELM TECHNICIAN

This is so unfair. You get that helm ghosts can come back because of the wires and stuff. Aaaaaand maybe you get why old forkhorns would have a biiiiiit of an issue with you. He definitely seemed kinda grouchy, later on.

But shouldn’t a helm ghost have to stay in the helmsblock? How’s he getting all the way to your respiteblock?


	46. ==> BE INDIGO SUPERVISING MEDICULLER CLEANCUT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Mid-level Mediculler: Be given a fantastic idea.

==> BE INDIGO SUPERVISING MEDICULLER CLEANCUT

You are an exemplary officer. But deep down, where no one can see, you believe the most important difference in society is between Those Who Make Messes, and Those Who Clean Them Up. YOU clean up messes.

Legislacerators are supposed to clean up messes, but mostly they make bigger messes in the process.

(At least you aren’t on a ship full of subjugglators.)

Necropaths do the very last cleanup, most of the time. You wouldn’t say you treat them with more respect than most of your rank – treating the necropaths with respect is, well, it’s just a good idea – but you think you probably feel more respect.

So you’re listening when the rookie necropath finishes reporting on clearing a few centipede-mauled ghosts out of the corpselocker and says, “I’m sure it’s not my place to say, but it really seems like this would be a good ship to have a zoopath on. Certainly a more constructive use of abilities than the cavalreapers…”


	47. ==> BE KARKAT [on the Unrelenting Persecution]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Karkat: punch assholes

==> BE KARKAT

Sollux looks… not as bad as you were afraid he would, actually. Tired, but that’s nothing you haven’t seen before. You think he’s probably telling the truth that this level of extra power draw won’t do him any real harm.

It’s still INFURIATING to see him in the damn helmscolumn, so you don’t have any trouble getting up the energy to march right over to the asshole fiddling with biowires and PUNCH HIM IN THE GROIN.


	48. ==> BE KANAYA [before Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: Say farewell to your wardrobe.

==> BE KANAYA

Jadebloods have a volume limit on what they get to bring, not a mass limit. How many outfits you can bring depends on how much you are willing to compress them. You’re prioritizing the actual sewing supplies, but you should still have room for an… adequate amount of clothing.

Whether you’ll have any opportunity to wear it is another question, but you’re mostly sure they won’t object to you wearing something a little more interesting around your dormblock.


	49. ==> BE JUNIOR SUBJUGGLATOR BLUBRUSH

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee's death?

==> BE JUNIOR SUBJUGGLATOR BLUBRUSH

Honestly the new meat hasn’t been as much fun as you were expecting. Sometimes he puts up a proper fight, and sometimes he obeys orders from his superiors like a good little conscript, but a lot of the time he just goes weirdly passive. Seriously it’s embarrassing for a purple.

So when he goes limp, you take your time going over to pull his head out of the paint vat. You slap him a few times, but yeah, he’s stopped breathing.

“Motherfuck, already?” Spatters says. “Should we take him to the medicullers?”

“Nah.” You cut the cords tying the corpse’s hands behind its back. “He wasn’t a lot of fun anyway.”


	50. ==> BE ARADIA [doing detail work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia: Separate little brownblooded ghost and Gamzee?

==> BE ARADIA

You tease loose the final knot, glad Feferi is keeping Gamzee’s attention with a lively story about a very unsuccessful boating party she had to rescue once. This is challenging enough.

It really was a terribly impressive tangle, all sticky, choking strands of guilt and shame and fear, laced through with the sting of Gamzee’s untrained highblood psychic powers. You were surprised – a little worried – that a non-necropath was able to hang on to a ghost like this, but Skeleton didn’t seem to think there was any cause for concern.

A final tug, and the brownblood conscript tumbles loose, practically into your lap. You take one look at his face and shove Gamzee and Feferi through the wall of your block into the corridor. Hopefully Feferi will get the idea not to come back for a while.

“I–” he gasps. “I – I – I’m not – oh, fuck, oh fuck – why didn’t he let me GO, damn him, wasn’t culling me enough? Why me, why, what did I do to deserve that – that – that ship–”

You (just barely) get him calmed down enough to learn his name – Perlen Nerrit. And then you have a dilemma on your hands, because keeping him and Gamzee around seems like a really bad idea, and you’re not about to dispel Gamzee. But it’s not Perlen’s fault he got pulled into this debacle, and you’re pretty sure Gamzee wouldn’t want him dispelled on his account. Maybe you can stash him somewhere out-of-the-way until he calms down?

You end up asking Drybleach. Drybleach suggests the file storage room off Officer Corpsepap’s office.

Hopefully the poor kid won’t end up more traumatized – there’s a reason no one’s in there already – but… Right now, probably better than being around Gamzee.


	51. ==> BE TAVROS [during the trial of the sweep or so]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: I really wanna see how the trolls reacted when Gamzee got all spooky when he was with Tavros. Necropath AU. Tavros lie about why you are being haunted.

==> BE TAVROS

When Gamzee fades into visibility, he is reading over your shoulder. You aren’t used to seeing a face there, since your horns make it impossible, but there’s a flicker in the corner of your eye and there he is – smudged paint and bruises and blood around his nose, and also your horn going through his head.

Tiblee, next to you, screams and tips over backwards.

“Don’t panic, Nitram,” Nineeyes says, holding out a cautioning hand. “It’s just a ghost, it probably got lost looking for the trial.”

Gamzee’s eyes widen, and he looks around the block. Everyone is staring at him – and at you, by extension. *Sorry*, he mouths, and heads out through the wall.

“Good, Nitram,” Nineeyes approves. “Never panic at a ghost. They feed on it.”

You’re not at all sure that’s correct, but don’t mention it.


	52. ==> BE KARKAT [on the Unrelenting Persecution]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia "clearing the helmsblock of the groin-punching former helmsman"?

==> BE KARKAT

You are mostly sure Aradia’s expression is only so severe to keep from laughing. Sollux’s face is definitely twitching under the rig. YOU are free to laugh as much as you want, but you don’t – you’re too annoyed you’re going to have to wait a hundred hours before picking up your campaign again.

Well, she did say you could have one last go before hiatus.

“And when does this ghost tend to manifest?” Aradia asks, very seriously.

Before the technician can answer, you punch him.


	53. ==> BE BONEBELT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia: Talk shop with the other necropaths?

==> BE BONEBELT

“Subjugglators are the worst,” Drybleach says. “Never go in to deal with a full-strength senior subjugglator without backup.”

“Oh, they’re bad,” Scavenge agrees. “But not as bad as a REALLY bad helmsblock haunting.”

“Oh?” Megido asks, eyebrows raised.

Scavenge has to look at Skeleton, who clarifies, “He means the kind of helmsblock haunting we really don’t have a choice but to clear up – the ones that are indiscriminately violent and won’t be reasoned with.”

“They’ve taken out entire ships,” Scavenge agrees.

Megido nods, and you wonder if she’s thinking about her plausibly deniable friend on the Unrelenting Persecution. “What do you think is the hardest?” she asks you.

You don’t even have to think about it. “It doesn’t happen often, but the worst I’ve ever seen was aliens. It was something specific about them, I guess – millions of them formed this huge – gestalt ghost. There were a hundred of us from ten different squadrons and we still would have been killed, if not for,” you tilt your head towards Skeleton, meaning the dead necropaths as a group.


	54. ==> BE SENIOR PEDAGOGUE HIGHTIDE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Who was the person who recommended Eridan get a psych eval?

==> BE SENIOR PEDAGOGUE HIGHTIDE

“No,” you say.

Undertow blinks. “No?”

“No.”

“But… He hasn’t put a single thing in the underwater portion of his personal blocks. He doesn’t even go in the communal pools!”

You shrug. “It’s weird, and Ampora’s a little fucked up in the head. Worry about Bissel’s psychosomatic breathing problems instead. The Fleet needs seadwellers who can function in air, Undertow.”


	55. ==> BE KARKAT [worrying]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Karkat: Take care of (or worry about) your friends.

==> BE KARKAT

You have a mental Concern Priority List.

You worry about Aradia spreading herself too thin or putting herself in danger. Necropath or not she’s still rust, and the other necropaths may not see death as a big deal but YOU DO. The most you can do about it is keep rein on the rest of the terrifying ghost army – make sure no one reveals anything they shouldn’t about you or Feferi or… whatever.

Feferi you’re not really worried about. You’ve both about mastered the quick fade and she’s better than you at resisting summons – she could get away, if someone tried to dispel her. You’re slightly worried about what she gets up to, but not enough to try to do anything about it.

Gamzee is so much better than he was and he is still smoking wreckage. (In some ways you guess he started out that way but still.) You worry a LOT about him. As far as Gamzee’s concerned, the influx of Overbear victims has been really helpful. They’re mostly young highbloods and bluebloods, so they aren’t scared of Gamzee for what he is – and a lot of them are smoking wreckage, too.

Sollux is never going to convince you that he is okay with the helmscolumn. You worry that the power drains will go too far and you won’t notice until too late. You worry that punching the techs will make things worse.

You worry that Tavros’s position is too precarious and Terezi will get pushed to a line she can’t cross. You worry that Eridan will decide he’s REALLY flushed for Nepeta and it will be a total disaster. You aren’t as worried about Equius, with Overbear gone, but Equius is still a clusterfuck of a troll and anything could happen. You worry about Kanaya alone on Alternia, and Vriska even more alone wherever the fuck she is now.

And then you cram it all down and focus on the things you can change.


	56. ==> BE GAMZEE [socializing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee: Hang out with your new ghostly pals.

==> BE GAMZEE

After the trial, Chidro gets his guitar back! Well probably more importantly he gets his face back, but he’s really excited about the guitar, and offers to play you all of his songs that he wrote.

“Please say this isn’t happening,” Panthe moans. (Panthe was a bit jumpy around you on the other ship after the nosebleed thing, but you guess something at the trial made him get over it? Karkat made some pointed remark about hyposomething.)

“Hey, calm down,” Cerull says, putting a hand on Panthe’s shoulder. Panthe growls at him.


	57. ==> BE SKELETON / SOME OTHER GHOST

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ghost: Realize who Aradia's ancestress is. Quietly panic.

==> BE SKELETON

Drybleach said she’d found a strong one, and she wasn’t exaggerating. The girl has experience using her powers, too, and classic necropath’s horns. She looks around curiously as she follows Drybleach off the transport. The unfortunately named Flaybone, dead just a few sweeps, trails after both of them. “Skeleton,” he says cheerfully, “this is Aradia Megido.”

Megido.

MEGIDO.

What the FUCK.

You greet everyone politely and excuse yourself to go remember you don’t need to breathe, let alone hyperventilate.

* * *

==> BE SOME OTHER GHOST, SOME TIME LATER

You are called Telltale, and you have spent over five hundred sweeps telling secrets to necropaths, so you are caught completely by surprise when Skeleton grabs you by the horn and drags you through a wall.

“What the fuck do you think you’re doing?”

You blink at her. “I was going to tell Drybleach the reason she couldn’t find the Heiress is your rookie is hiding her.” Not everyone could recognize an incognito tyrian, but you’re good.

“Well, don’t.”

“I thought you appreciated my helping the live necropaths.”

“One, not by shoving other necropaths in danger, and two, I can’t believe I’m having to explain this to you of all people.” She drags you through another wall to the officeblock where the rookie is delivering a report. “Have you even looked at her?”

“…Yes?”

“Okay, now add five sweeps, what do you see?”

“…A fully grown rustblood?”

Skeleton rolls her eyes. “Add five sweeps, a green dress, and a desire to watch the universe burn, and what do you see?”

…Oh.

…You see your death.

…You decide maybe you’ll relocate to a ship where the Demoness’s descendant isn’t. And not mess with any of her pet projects. Yeah, that sounds like a plan.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Don't read beyond this if you haven't gotten to Chapter 55, Another Interlude, in the main fic!


	58. ==> BE GHOST!ERITHE PROBOS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska's death?

==> BE GHOST!ERITHE PROBOS

New Girl ALMOST makes it through the door. But not quite. It was probably the sleep deprivation which slowed her down. She swears up a storm instead of screaming, which you find impressive – you got crushed, too, albeit in pistons rather than a door, and you screamed until you passed out. Then the pressure crushes her metal arm, the door snaps closed the rest of the way, and she gurgles and goes limp.

Sharpwit, Scanfire, and Shredear mosey into the corridor to observe. Scanfire smugly collects her winnings, and the other two start arguing over who has to clean up the mess.

Beside you, Gilyan and Damphand break into an out-of-tune chorus of Troll Another One Bites The Dust. You studiously ignore them and eye the body. The only person to die since you was older than Ashstead and didn’t leave a ghost, but you have a feeling Serket is going to come out swinging.


	59. ==> BE MAINTENANCE SPECIALIST SUPERVISOR NINEEYES

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Janiterrorist: Do not get killed by rampaging lusus.

==> BE MAINTENANCE SPECIALIST SUPERVISOR NINEEYES

You’re not planning on sacrificing yourself for your subordinates, that’s just not a done thing, but you also aren’t going to throw Tiblee into the damn crocodile’s jaws to save yourself. (Frieas or the cavalreaper brat, maybe. But they’re not in reach.)

But then the crocodile… slows. Stops. Changes direction, and wanders off down another corridor.

You spot the cavalreaper brat – Nitram – crouched in Giselt’s shadow with his hands to his temples, focusing, and oh. That’s why the medicullers want him on board.


	60. ==> BE PERSES RESHKI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: disorderlyImpulse: What do you think about the new trainee and her tech-savvy friend?

==> BE PERSES RESHKI

You still have no idea why Kebela thinks Kanaya Maryam is such a big fucking deal. She’s pleasant enough, and she’s got her head together, especially for such a raw novice, but you don’t see how that makes her important. It can’t be a perfect jade thing, Kebela’s perfect herself.

But you’re not complaining, because you haven’t had an excuse like this since Chidan’s old matesprit didn’t send anything with the scheduled official message dump and Chidan sensibly gave up. Plus, Maryam’s friends can actually write back! You’re seriously considering messaging twinArmageddons yourself to complain about termite coding peculiarities. It’s been a long time since you talked shop. (Sure, there must be some technically inclined jadebloods somewhere making sure the whole system doesn’t explode, but they’re probably really senior to you and you wouldn’t be comfortable telling them about your efforts to code a usable media player.) (Especially given what Maltha’s been using it for.)

(You can’t make heads or tails of some of the weird crap Maryam and her friends talk around, but unless it gets more interesting you’re not trying very hard.)


	61. ==> BE BONEBELT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Necropath: Boggle at the army of ghosts. Be confused and exasperated with your new trainee.

==> BE BONEBELT

Drybleach swings into the seniorblock with a scowl. “Why is there a guitar lesson going on in the corridor?”

“Because we threw them out of here,” Scavenge snaps back. “This has got to be against some sort of protocol.”

“Everyone accumulates ghosts, Scavenge, that’s just what happens,” you remind him. Also, you feel he has very little moral high ground to complain as he uses his accumulation of ghosts mostly for extortion.

Megido has been picking them up unusually fast, though, and the thing with the trial would have been unusual even for a necropath twice her age. You advised her to slow down a bit, back when she was just building up the group of murdered highblood conscripts, and she looked you in the eye and agreed very seriously and then went off to escort over a hundred angry ghosts to a trial.

You haven’t tried actually cracking down on her. Something about Skeleton’s attitude towards her makes you… wary of it.

Despite the guitar lessons.


	62. ==> BE TEREZI [in training]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Terezi: Attend class.

==> BE TEREZI

You had some of these procedures memorized when you were SIX. Also, from your older, wiser vantage point, you’re not sure anyone actually follows them.

So you don’t pay very close attention, and instead watch Skaree try to figure out how to sneak a poisoned stylus onto Pappad’s desk without his noticing. You’d care more if you weren’t about 70% sure he’s the one replacing your corridor’s coffee with decaf.


	63. ==> BE AN “ENTHUSIASTIC VIOLENCE” CREWMEMBER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee Serenade some trolls with your new guitar skills. (Trolls hear music from unknown source)

==> BE AN “ENTHUSIASTIC VIOLENCE” CREWMEMBER

They warned you when you transferred here that being on the same ship as Bureau of Retermination HQ could get surreal occasionally. They said many old crewmembers never really leave and you should be prepared for your predecessor to relay advice. They said there wasn’t much point trying to change it, it was a natural side effect of so many necropaths.

They never said anything about Troll Wonderwall coming from nowhere in the officers’ diningblock.


	64. ==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Id love to see what other trainees think of both Terezi's habitual licking and her eyes.

==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

You’ve been watching Pyrope’s damned licking since the hour you met her, because she tries to pass it off as an eccentricity but you KNEW there was a weakness behind there somewhere. You have an instinct for that sort of thing.

You figure it out, sort of, only after you’re no longer so interested in her weaknesses. She ditches her ridiculous ugly supposedly-quadrant-related glasses for a more understated pair much more suited for a legislacerator, and you catch a glimpse of her eyes.

What’s left of them, anyway.

That’s what she’s been hiding, you know at once. Everything goes back to that.

…You’re not sure HOW the licking comes back to it, but it must.


	65. ==> BE EQUIUS [worrying]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius: Be concerned about your moiral on a ship full of highbloods

==> BE EQUIUS

You know, intellectually, there is no reason to believe Nepeta is in any more danger on the “Magnificent Marine Predation” than she was on the “Brutal Domination of Inferiors” just because seadwellers are involved. If anything, security personnel there are in less danger, because it’s a quieter ship. And it’s not like you were able to hover over her shoulder and keep her safe when you were on the same ship.

You just still can’t help feeling like you’ve left her alone and defenseless.


	66. ==> BE SOMEONE WHO KNOWS WHAT SKAREE’S DEAL IS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Skaree => What is the deal with you anyways?

==> BE SOMEONE WHO KNOWS WHAT SKAREE’S DEAL IS

You are Cannis Skaree, and you know what your own deal is, all right?

Your mom is a dog-headed dragon, and she is two meters too long to come with you. TWO. FUCKING. METERS. It’s particularly grating now that you see some of the lusii that ARE here. That crocodile must not have included the tail in the measurement, and the centipede must have grown. And your mom would be much less trouble! Sure, she prefers to eat trolls, but she usually listens to you when you call her off. And she doesn’t really get her appetite up without a good chase.

…Okay, your mom would go rampaging through the ship chasing whoever you couldn’t convince her didn’t look tasty, squeezing through tight places breaking things and probably be more of a problem than the crocodile and the centipede put together, and she’d still be miserable because she prefers fresh air and space to FLY. So however much you miss her, it’s good she’s not here. (See, you have great self-awareness.)

You want to make her proud.

That means being top of the heap.

Your moirail is the kindest, gentlest, most implacably empathetic troll who ever got assigned to artillerannihilation. She swore up and down not to try to put the brakes on the Fleet the way she puts them on you, but you know her, you know how she gets when someone is about to be slaughtered without even a fighting chance, and you NEED to get her transferred before anyone orders her to push the button on terrified, screaming aliens.

You need to get to a place where you can push for transfers as fast as you can.

That means being top of the heap.

Your matesprit is kind of a sap, who wanted to get you posted on seadweller central doing… something, you don’t even know what, but you told him you had important things to do and you would do them very well. You need to prove you know what you’re doing and keep him from dragging you off to collect dust and/or mildew.

That means being top of the heap.

And not everyone can be top of the heap – but they knew what they were getting into when they picked legislaceration. You’ll be able to look your moirail in the eye. When you see her again, which you will, because you are the best, and you are going to do what you need to do.


	67. ==> BE ARADIA [contemplating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia: contemplate vriska

==> BE ARADIA

The thing about Vriska is, you’re not even really mad anymore, not about her trying to kill you.

It was a long time ago. You rebuilt your hive. You stopped having daymares.

Sollux didn’t stop having daymares, Sollux is probably never going to stop having daymares, because it was the first time he was used for his powers against his will but it was never going to be the last, so hey! She made herself the face of half his helmsman daymares. (At least, pre actual helming. You haven’t asked if the dreams have changed now.) He’s turned it into a joke, mostly, how he detests Vriska forever, and it’s not a lie exactly but there’s not the terror behind it that there used to be, not for Vriska the person rather than Vriska the personification of things that take away your personal autonomy and use you.

Terezi… is Terezi’s business.

Tavros. Tavros is the sticking point. Not even necessarily trying to kill him – that was bad and totally inappropriate and you don’t think you did anything wrong seeking revenge, but it was a stupid impulse decision. The problem was the way she carried on before AND AFTER. It took two interminable sweeps and massive concerted effort to hammer it into Vriska’s head that she needed to leave Tavros alone. You’re still not sure why she was so obsessed with him to begin with!

If Vriska were in contact, you’d trust Sollux to veto letting her in the dropbox if he didn’t feel comfortable with it. The only reason you’d veto is Tavros.

Tavros wouldn’t want you to, you know without asking. Tavros wouldn’t want to leave even Vriska on her own here. And he’s not wrong.

You guess you’ll see how things play out when she gets back from the reconnaissance mission. Maybe the Fleet’s taught her caution and loneliness, like it has Eridan and Equius – maybe it’s taught her to be the worst she can be, as has evidently happened to quite a few adults here.

It’ll be a pain, but Terezi will be happy to see her.


	68. ==> BE ERIDAN [contemplating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: Contemplate quadrants.

==> BE ERIDAN

You remind yourself frequently that you are not actually flushed for Nepeta Leijon, and you should keep it that way, if only because having Zahhak for a quadrant corner would be… something. Definitely something. It’s just that whenever you try to convince other people you start accidentally convincing yourself, and it’s awkward. You’re not even sure you know what flushed means anymore.

You may, you have to admit, have a very small pitchcrush on Mollym Awwakk. She has a grand sense of seadweller superiority and practically no style – she walks around in oil-stained pants! And she’s a huge bitch! And you don’t think she’s registered you as more than a freshman who annoys her.

And you thought the moirail zone was bad.

Speaking of which… you kind of appreciate what moirails are for more, now. You’d kind of like to have one. You don’t have anyone in mind, but… it’d be nice, that’s all.

Bissel tried to ash-hit on you with respect to Awwakk, but if she even knew you existed you wouldn’t want an auspistice, so you told him to fuck off and practice breathing.


	69. ==> BE RELRIN BISSEL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Guy with breathing problems, why on earth do you have such problems??

==> BE RELRIN BISSEL

Well… you’re a SEADWELLER, all right? Why would you be a SEADWELLER if you weren’t supposed to be in the SEA? All this air stuff is so unnatural, it’s terrible, you don’t know why the Fleet would be set up this way. Sure, the others say they don’t have any problems. It must be the landdweller in them. (But you don’t say that, because it would be REALLY rude.)


	70. ==> BE SOLLUX [contemplating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sollux: Torment helms technicians (subtly or not)

==> BE SOLLUX

It would make AA and KK feel a lot better if you did. They both think it’s really weird and worrying that you haven’t. You KNOW it’s weird and worrying. It just keeps… not happening.

It might be conditioning. But if it is, it isn’t causing any problems with any of the rule-bending or treasonous stuff you’ve been into. Why would they condition helmsmen against screwing with their techs and leave them free to do… all the rest of it? And you don’t have much of an issue with KK screwing with them, it just makes you a little nervous.

Maybe you’re just scared.

Ugh.


	71. ==> BE ANANAS STRIGI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: FruityLoops(or one of the other helmspeople)'s opinion of the New Kid

==> BE ANANAS STRIGI

(First of all, you are SO GLAD not to be the New Kid anymore. So. Glad.)

You miss Forkhorns some. He was pretty mellow, and patient with you, and probably shouldn’t have died yet. But overall you like twinArmageddons! He complained a lot and insulted your intelligence, but helped you with your malware problem all the same so you didn’t have to get a ~software specialist~ in. So you didn’t hesitate to tell Domi he’s an okay guy.

What you would never say to Domi, or Ruthie, is that you’re also really happy to have someone else in the squadron who doesn’t identify as the damn ship. (Forkhorns was a nickname – he’d introduce himself as Unrelenting Persecution.) Maybe it’d be different if you didn’t have Cephal to talk to, who knew you before, but as it is you will message as loopyFruits no matter how much people laugh, because you’re not the Enthusiastic Violence, you’re ANANAS STRIGI, and that MATTERS to you. You don’t know twinArmageddons’s name (it’s probably in the computer but you’re not that good with computers), but you bet that’s what his necropath girlfriend (and possibly ghost friends? you don’t even know) calls him.

Two probably isn’t enough for a I’M NOT A SPACESHIP I’M JUST STUCK TO ONE club. You may propose it anyway.


	72. ==> BE EMIJAK “BUCKET FACE” ARTHRO

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: One of the arguments between the techs over "who Sollux likes more"?
> 
> [doesn’t include the actual arguing, sorry]

==> BE EMIJAK “BUCKET FACE” ARTHRO

(You would be very unhappy to learn anyone, anywhere is calling you by a nickname based on the most mortifying moment of your life.)

It starts because Wireburn reads an article which says helms with good relationships with the technicians can see a 2-5% improvement in performance even accounting for discipline. Since even Wireburn realizes she has all the empathy of overcooked grubloaf, she immediately assigned the rest of you to Improve Relations With The Helmsman.

And you can see the point, of course you can see the point, increased productivity means more profits for everyone and you’re as broke as the next troll. But Persy’s even less friendly than Forkhorns was, and Forkhorns wasn’t a social fluttervermin.

(“Persy” because any variants on “Unrelenting” belong to the helm before Forkhorns, which some people still remember, and nothing else has jumped out as a good name after Turnover vetoed “Doubles” for some reason.)

But Essevi is taking it on, and damned if you’ll let Essevi beat you at ANYTHING.


	73. ==> BE NEPETA [trying to go to work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta! walk in on something that you did not want to see. Immediately gossip to Eridan

==> BE NEPETA

One of the unwritten rules is to never, never, NEVER let your colleagues catch you cheating on your seadweller quadrant. They have to turn you in or become complicit, and it’s not right to do that to them. People are pretty good about it, as far as you can tell; you haven’t even heard any rumors.

When it comes to quadrants not occupied by seadwellers, people get a lot less discreet. So you very pointedly do NOT investigate the noises coming from the other bunkblock.

But Hesten has to get his other jacket, so he screws up his face and goes in. Then he shrieks, and you can’t not look.

Two seadwellers are fucking on somebody’s bunk.

You find yourself hoping they are Briate’s auspisticees and it’s Briate’s bunk, because otherwise this could happen to anyone.

You are so trolling Eridan about this.


	74. ==> BE TAVROS [at other work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: How are the medicullers treating you?

==> BE TAVROS

For the most part, the medicullers treat you as irreplaceable equipment. They check you over every few days. They make sure you get a proper diet. You caught several of them arguing about whether it would “damage” you to summon you in the middle of your sleep cycle. You even have an equipment codename – you’re the zoosynchronizer.

Supervisor Cleancut uses your name, and so do some of the younger or lower-blooded personnel. One of the orderlies may even be flirting, it’s hard to tell.


	75. ==> BE ENGIVISCERATOR WIREBURN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Turnover: why veto "doubles"?

==> BE ENGIVISCERATOR WIREBURN

Turnover vetoed “Doubles” because Turnover is a superstitious old gasbag. Most of the younger technicians haven’t even heard about the saw that anything to do with the number two makes helmsmen unruly, because it’s stupid even as superstitions go. When you started, Turnover’s predecessor wouldn’t even let exactly two technicians in the room, so you suppose Turnover could be doing a lot worse than just rejecting a nickname.

Superstitious old gasbag.


	76. Superstitions

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Are their any other interesting superstitions around certain jobs or equipment?

Takedown: They say His Honorable Tyranny is less likely to kill you while you’re cleaning if you whistle or hum the theme song from those learn-to-read early schoolfeeding vids. Not if you sing, though.

Jorjel: It won’t REALLY mellow your quadrants if you leave your quadrant jewelry in sopor for the day, but a lot of people do it anyway.

Skeleton: You do not ever say the Demoness’s hatchname. She can tell. –That may actually be true, I don’t know.

Blubrush: It’s really good luck if you can beat the victim to death without spilling any blood, and then when you cut the body’s throat the blood pool will form your serendipitous matesprit’s sign.

Tiblee: If you have to clean up a bucket spill, it means you’re going to get laid!

Oncetold: If a non-perfect jadeblood enters the presence of the Mother Grub, something terrible will happen. Probably she’ll instinctively try to kill them and make a spectacular mess.

Backwing: Some people will tell you… Never mind, just don’t believe any unusual claims about seadweller genetic material.

Caviah: If you’re walking in a group, don’t be the only one in an airlock.

Sharpeye: It’s supposed to be bad luck to pre-tie a noose.

Nineeyes: If you’re having trouble with your equipment, group attempts in powers of two.

Awwakk: It’s bad luck to have full quadrants with no landdwellers. Though I think that may just be something they spread around to encourage the timid ones to crawl out of the water.

Skaree: If your lusus isn’t with the Fleet, don’t bring it up, or something might happen to it. If someone else’s lusus isn’t with the Fleet, don’t bring it up, or something might happen to your lusus.

Backwing: Or seadweller hair, it doesn’t turn into tentacles if it’s out of the water too long OR in the water too long, it doesn’t turn into tentacles at all.

Ananas: The techs have a lot of weird hangups about touching biowires with bare skin they say are simple safety guidelines, but Cephal ignores most of them and she seems fine.

Cleancut: Don’t let cross-spectrum blood mix – not just to prevent blood contact, don’t let it mix on the floor or the tool sterilizer or anywhere else. It’s bad luck. Although that’s partially due to the occasional particularly high-strung highblood who gets offended by it.

Domi: You can supposedly tell a tech’s character from whether they circle the column clockwise or counterclockwise.

Perses: Seven sweeps of bad luck if you accidentally kill a grub.

Kebela: Thirteen sweeps of bad luck if you spill a genetic material shipment.

Pappad: For better luck intimidating people, leave a one-centimeter band of your horns unpolished.

Scanfire: No matter how pathetic the aliens are, don’t say they’re no threat anywhere but the final report.

Hightide: Most of the students insist on eating breakfast underwater before major exams.

Alkaid: If a lowblood spits on a subjugglator’s clubs, the subjugglator won’t be able to perform sexually until they’ve washed the clubs in a seadweller’s genetic material. …What? I didn’t come up with it!


	77. ==> BE ERIDAN [being discreet]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: What are the other seadwellers' lusii like? Is anyone aware that you used to be an Orphaner?

==> BE ERIDAN

You are actually really grateful for the size limit, because it means that most of the lusii here aren’t the kind of lusii you would have considered prime Gl’bgolyb-feeding material. Not big enough. …Which is not to say you’ve never killed any lusii like them, you just. Never went LOOKING for them.

You don’t think anyone knows you used to hunt lusii for Gl’bgolyb. You’re certainly not going to bring it up. You wouldn’t even if you weren’t being careful never to mention anything relating to Feferi.


	78. ==> BE VRISKA [keeping busy]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska: reflect on how unfair things were for you

==> BE VRISKA

TOO BUSY FOR THAT! You need to help Damphand and Ashstead get worked up enough to do the walls, then you and Probos and Gilyan are going to let the assholes know what it feels like to have unusable sopor. (Probos isn’t ANGRY enough to have much of an effect on his own, but he wants to help and he does understand the plumbing better than you or Gilyan do.) (Gilyan is totally blackflirting with you.) (Possibly mostly to piss off Damphand, you can support that, you had to use your powers to make Damphand keep her hands to her fucking self, it was the first time since you died and it gave you a ghost headache, but it was a useful breakthrough to have.) (Ashstead is the only one Damphand doesn’t drive insane, probably because he’s old an unattractive.)

(You have no respect at all for any of them and they have no respect at all for you, and you are a KICKASS team.)


	79. ==> BE FOUR PEOPLE WHO TOTALLY WEREN'T MURDERED

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska's new allies: who are you, exactly, how did you die, and what do you think of Vriska?

==> BE THE ONE WHO WASN’T MURDERED BECAUSE HE WAS PRACTICALLY ABOUT TO DROP DEAD

Seriously, you weren’t THAT old.

Your name is Ashstead, you’re low olive, and you’re an experienced sensor tech – the same field as Scanfire, which you think is at least half the reason they killed you. Sharpwit was supposedly giving you a tetanus shot, but actually, “accidentally” gave you some sort of expired drug which caused a massive brain hemorrhage. ~Oopsie!~

You’ve seen kids like Serket before – they burn bright and burn out fast and usually take out a dozen bystanders in the inferno. You avoided them. Religiously. Of course, now you’re haunting the same small ship, which makes avoidance difficult, and already dead, which makes it much less of a priority. And she’s got some good ideas.

She may still get you all EXTRA dead, but it wouldn’t be that much of a loss.

==> BE THE ONE WHO WASN’T MURDERED BECAUSE SHE WAS REALLY STUCK-UP ABOUT BEING A ~HIGH~ OLIVE

But you ARE a really high olive. You tolerate sunlight! You think you may have been misclassified somehow.

Your name is Niobie Gilyan, and you’d been in the Fleet a few sweeps before you got this shitty assignment. You’re a biology technician – not a bioligarchist, that’s strictly blueblood up, but you were well-rated. (Jades are good at biology stuff!) Your sun tolerance came in handy for planetary surveys, too! And then they locked you out of the ship for the day cycle on a planet with a thin atmosphere and nastier solar radiation than Alternia’s. You think they weren’t quite expecting the consequences. They offered a killshot without your asking.

Serket is a hot mess. But she’s a MOTIVATED hot mess, who knows more than urban legends about what ghosts can actually accomplish. …Also she’s just hot, and makes you want to PROVE that you are NOT a kiddie-level ghost.

==> BE THE ONE WHO WASN’T MURDERED BECAUSE SHE WAS WARNED TO KEEP HER HANDS TO HERSELF

Some people are so SENSITIVE.

Your name is NOT Damphand. (Sharpwit started calling you that, everyone picked it up, the asshole captain REGISTERED IT, and even the other dead people won’t drop it, but you chose the name Darkhand.) You were merely checking if Shredear’s pants fit properly when he turned around and hit you with a reinforced sample case, even though he’s olive and you’re teal. Then they let you choke on your own vomit. And laughed about it.

You cannot believe Serket had the nerve to mind control you into sticking your finger up your nose every time you try to touch her. Then she expanded it to include touching anyone! But she’s the best (read: only) shot you have at ever getting back at the people who killed you, so you’ll tolerate her. (And you’ve all been putting up with each other for a while.)

==> BE THE ONE WHO WASN’T MURDERED BECAUSE HIS DEATH WAS TECHNICALLY ACCIDENTAL, NO, AN ACTUAL ACCIDENT

Yeah, sure, they didn’t push you into the thrusters or even make you do the maintenance without powering down, but they gave you all the damn workshifts so you were sleep-deprived and in a hurry and whatever, you blame them.

Your name is Erithe Probos, you’re a middle-of-the-road olive (not that anyone ever cared before), and you were a rookie when you got here. Not quite right off the homeworld, but you’re from the previous round of conscription and you’re not freshly dead, so. You don’t know why you ended up here, you didn’t have any real skills for a reconnaissance mission, and you don’t think you did anything to make anyone mad enough to want you dead? The crew here didn’t particularly want you dead. They were a little sheepish about it even. Though come to think of it that was probably because they then had to thoroughly clean the thrusters.

Vriska’s pretty cool, though she would probably have been terrifying to know on Alternia – you haven’t forgotten what she said about feeding kids to her lusus. For the Fleet she’s not bad. And since you’re both dead, you are not scared of her and are going to continue laughing at all her absurd ghost piracy ideas until she realizes they deserve to be laughed at.


	80. ==> BE NEPETA [at work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan and Nepeta: Have an awkward conversation. (Any awkward conversation.)

==> BE NEPETA

“Hey Ampora, isn’t that your girlfriend? No, wait, your grrrlfurriend? Aren’t you going to go say hi?”

You close your eyes briefly, but otherwise do not pause in composing the maintenance request for someone to come replace the overhead light which appears to have been stabbed. You don’t approach your seadweller quadrant (or “quadrant”); they approach you.

“If you’re that interested in my quadrants you should look into findin’ a few if your own, Itchy.”

“ICTHEE.”

But you can hear Eridan approaching so, conscious of the audience, you compose a careful shy, slightly nervous smile before you turn around.

“Hey Nep. How’s it going?”

“Mr. Ampurra.” You smile a little more. “Not badly, sir.” Should you not have called him sir? No, you’re on duty even if he isn’t, it should be sir. “How are you?”

“Oh, fine, fine. I’m just kicking everyone’s asses in dry athletics.”

One of the other seadwellers mutters something which probably isn’t a compliment. You should maybe not pursue the subject.

“Thank you again for the kitty sculpture, Mr. Ampurra. It’s adorable.” It is adorable; it is also quite large and currently occupying the empty bunk in your barracks because you have nowhere to put it.

He beams. “Oh, good.”

“Now kiss her!” one of the other seadwellers calls.

It at least gives Eridan an excuse to flounce off in a huff.


	81. ==> BE ATTENDER VIGILANT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: an inner cavern attendant, on Kanaya and maybe her link with Karkat.

==> BE ATTENDER VIGILANT

You don’t know what Maryam’s connection to the Second Signless is supposed to be, and you’re not going to ask. Artemi shouldn’t have said as much as she did. (You are grateful she did, but she still shouldn’t have.)

The other thing…

You draw Maryam aside into your office and close the door. “I’m going to come out and ask. Do you have a Matriorb?”

She blinks. “Uh, yes. Safely packed…”

You nod. “Good. Maryam, this is going to be new territory for all of us, but we need to mature the Matriorb.”

She blinks again. “Uh, w-why?”

It never gets easier, saying this. “The Mother Grub is very old, Maryam. She needs… We need to explore other options.”


	82. ==> BE CERULL NUFLIN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: That ghost that really likes ashen relationships trying to auspisticize between Vriska and that other ghost?

==> BE CERULL NUFLIN

As it turns out, Supreme High Ghostleader Vantas does NOT need an auspistice. No, not even with those helm techs. Especially not with them. Such a disappointment.

But you’ve been paying attention, and it sounds to you like Vriska Serket is going to need an auspistice. Possibly a battalion of them. So you’re prepared, and the minute you see her getting in Panthe’s face you spring into action.

“Hang on!” You pop up between them, waving frantically. “I’ve got this.”


	83. ==> BE VRISKA [reunioning]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska: Reunite with your old (friends?)

==> BE VRISKA

You and Gilyan are in the captain’s respiteblock, methodically destroying all his media discs, when Probos tumbles in through the wall. “The necropath’s here!”

It’s not a surprise. Ashstead and Damphand have been alternating dire warnings with ‘I told you so’s ever since the mission turned back early (even though they NEVER TOLD YOU SO). You had the idea of leaving the ship before the necropath arrived, but Probos and Ashstead just couldn’t manage it for whatever stupid ghost reason (could be color, but you think they’re not angry enough), so here you all are.

You roll to your feet. “Come on, let’s go check the big bad ghostbuster!”

When in doubt, full speed ahead.

The big bad ghostbuster is Aradia Megido, looking very professional in a death-green uniform, seriously taking notes as the captain yammers on about how he has no idea where these ghosts could have come from.

Or pretending to take notes, at least. When you peer over her shoulder, she has a text window open: yes vriska i kn0w y0ure here

“Oh!” you say, because of COURSE she knows you’re here.

“'Oh’ what?” Gilyan says, elbowing in. “She knows your name? You’re friends with a necropath?”

“Uh, well, not exactly – we have friends in common, but she’s the one who had me haunted, and then I tried to use her boyfriend to kill her… It was this whole big thing. Megido, just so you know, these guys completely deserve everything we haunted them with, they murder everybody.”

we gathered that, Aradia writes, never changing her expression of earnest, respectful attention. im n0t g0ing t0 dispel y0u, just esc0rt y0u 0ff the ship. and y0ur… friends?

“Uh…” Close enough, if Gilyan and Probos aren’t going to correct her. (Probos isn’t looking over her shoulder, but he’s the least likely to object anyway. “This is Gilyan, she was murdered too, and Probos who was, uh, sort of murdered.”

“I was not SORT OF murdered–”

Gilyan rolls her eyes. “It was an accident.”

“Ashstead and Damphand are around somewhere–” You do a quick scan. “Oh, they’re right over there!”

“Trying NOT to come to the necropath’s attention, Serket,” Ashstead grouches, emerging from the wall. (Anyone else would NOT be able to leave Damphand at their back like that.)

“I’m sure she already knew,” you scoff.

i did, Aradia writes. im esc0rting y0u all t0 necr0path hq, every0ne was very impressed by y0ur haunting and want t0 kn0w h0w y0u did it

You preen. Wait, should you be denying it?

==> BE VRISKA, A WHILE LATER

During the trek back to necropath HQ, also known as the offices of the Bureau of Retermination, Aradia took a moment to murmur, “Do NOT name any names which should not be named.” You looked at her like she was crazy, but you finally get it when you see FEFERI emerging from the crowd of ghosts.

(You didn’t know the Heiress well before Eridan dragged her to your FLOP of an Ascension party, but between that and everyone crashing at Karkat’s, you found out she’s pretty cool. Speaking of…)

“Is, uh…” You gesture vaguely. “Um…”

“CG’s around too,” Feferi says cheerfully. “He and TC are on another ship right now.”

You stop yourself from exclaiming over Gamzee’s – probable – death. “How about, um… Have you heard from GC at all?”

“Wave heard from just about everybody! You’ve missed a lot. But GC’s fine.”


	84. ==> BE GAMZEE [practicing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee, getting training from somebody on how to use his chucklevoodoos. Or, more accurately, how to not use them on accident.

==> BE GAMZEE

Thing is, there’s no one in the Terrifying Ghost Army who’s really a chucklevoodoos expert. Apparently Overbear didn’t consider it a desirable trait. Unsurprisingly. And by the time you realized you could ask for help, Overbear was dead and much of the army had dispersed, one way or another. It turns out your best remaining option is Chidro, who’s not that strong and who only uses his limited powers to add “pathos” to his music.

You learn some guitar-based meditation, which may help?

Aradia asks around, and eventually tells you that Skeleton knows a dead subjugglator who would be willing to help you. “But it’s a Surepain, so we may want to avoid that if we can.”


	85. ==> BE VRISKA [before Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska pov: Ascension party

==> BE VRISKA

You invited everyone you know – everyone! (Except Tavros, because you’re not supposed to contact him.) You invited everyone to invite everyone THEY know! You bought extra-large speakers and a disco ball and enough intoxicants to go swimming in! You cleared out ALL YOUR BOOBY TRAPS!

What do you get? You get Eridan getting drunk and maudlin and excessively nostalgic (unlike you, you’re only becoming a more dazzling conversationalist), Kanaya looking more and more uncomfortable, the Heiress seeming more interested in land food/beverages than partying as such, and Terezi regaling you with why various mutual acquaintances wouldn’t come to your party. You all end up drinking Drugs brand beverage and pitching the cans at Equius’s hive, since the asshole didn’t even RSVP you. The Heiress turns out to be the only one who can throw an empty can that far; all the others vanish down into the ravine.

Your lusus rumbles unhappily from below. You get up on the balcony railing to shout down, “Enjoy it while you can, you worthless lazy… bulge blister! I’m going to space, and you’ll have to feed yourself! Oh wait, you can’t! Unless you’ve been LYING TO ME–”

Kanaya grabs the back of your dress as you sway forward and pulls you off the railing. “Maybe we should go inside.”

No sooner have you sat down when Terezi RUINS the atmosphere with, “So Vriska, what are you planning for drone season?” Kanaya looks mortified.

You throw your mostly empty can at her. “I have a BucketList rendezvous set up, IF it’s any of your business.”

Eridan frowns, now drunk and confused. “I thought they blacklisted you.”

“My hive, yeah. So I gave them Karkat’s address.”

Kanaya spits Drugs all over Terezi.


	86. ==> BE RECONNAISSANCE VESSEL CAPTAIN FARSIGHT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Fleet scout captain: deal with the necropath

==> BE RECONNAISSANCE VESSEL CAPTAIN FARSIGHT

The necropath is very young, but seems to know what she’s doing. You guess lowbloods mature fast.

You do kind of get the feeling she doesn’t believe that you don’t know what could be causing the haunting. Do they have access to long-term logs? You’ll admit you don’t have the best track record…


	87. ==> BE TAVROS [socializing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: Swap highblood stories with your coworkers.

==> BE TAVROS

“He’d been here longer than anyone could remember,” Takedown continues. “Well, than any of us lowbloods remember – you know what I mean. Every criminal he got executed, he’d have the head preserved and mounted on the wall of his respiteblock. He kept requisitioning larger quarters when he ran out of room. He had a few in his office he’d hang things on.”

You pull a face, as expected. “What happened to him?”

“He got old and slow and the crocodile lusus got him. Nobody knew what to do with all the heads. For a couple sweeps they’d pop up here and there around the ship when people used them in practical jokes, which sounds really funny until about the third recuperacoon you have to clean because someone left a head in there… I think they’re mostly destroyed now.”

“Mostly,” Frieas adds ominously.

“Your turn, Nitram,” Giselt says. “What’s the worst highblood YOU’VE met?”

“Uh, well…” What does “worst” even mean? “There’s, um, Vriska, probably. But honestly, I think she would have been, about the same, no matter where she was on the hemospectrum…”


	88. ==> BE A COUPLE OF SUREPAINS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: one of the Surepains on Karkat and/or the ghostghostghostion?

==> BE THE SUREPAIN ON THE RUTHLESS REGULATION

You usually get called Surepain, yes, but technically your name was registered as Truepain, because you’d heard that “Surepain” as a name was getting a BIT of a reputation, and you wanted to be at least a LITTLE subtle. It didn’t quite work.

(The subjugglators never came for you, but one of your legislacerator colleagues figured you out. For whatever reason, instead of turning you in, she subtly tripped you into His Honorable Tyranny’s reserved space, and that was it for you. Then she went and tossed all your personal effects in the incinerator. You only worked out she hadn’t suddenly developed a violent platonic hatred when you saw her purge all your data devices and not show more than a twitch of surprise at a few definitely heretical things. To this day you don’t know why she killed you instead of turning you in. You wanted to ask her when she died, but she never showed up as a ghost.)

You watch the swarm of Colonel Overbear’s victims with awe. You’ve never seen ghosts mobilized like this. Sure, there’s a necropath involved somewhere, but it still really impresses you – maybe you should try to do more outreach, if ghosts can make this kind of difference.

Then you see a brief, almost instantaneous flash of too-bright red blood amid shapes smeared with shades of blue. You wouldn’t have seen if you hadn’t been watching – you can’t even figure out which one it was, after – maybe you just imagined it, because you were thinking about outreach, but–

Maybe it was real?

==> BE THE SUREPAIN WHO KNOWS SKELETON

Skeleton is great, and EXTREMELY helpful to be on good terms with, but the trouble with necropaths is they never take anything but their own business completely seriously. So no matter how hard you try to explain that no, she doesn’t understand, it’s REALLY IMPORTANT for you to know why some ghost connected to a just-conscripted necropath is asking questions around the Cult of the Signless, she just smirks and tells you to be patient.

You know death isn’t always the end. You know DISPERSAL isn’t always the end, if someone is strong enough, and you have to believe the Second Signess would be strong enough even as a child. So you are not despairing, no matter what. But you would really like to know if there is REASON TO HOPE RIGHT NOW, COME ON, SKELETON, WILL YOU GIVE ME A DAMNED *HINT*?!


	89. ==> BE ERIDAN [keeping up appearances]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: Publicly "flirt" with Nepeta

==> BE ERIDAN

Being polite to a lowblood your own age not in some particularly delicate specialty is considered flirting. Thankfully. You’re not very good at flirting. VRIS once told you that you were heavy-handed.


	90. ==> BE NAPPIS “GREASY” ESSEVI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee: Serenade those helmstechs. Serenade them all day long.

==> BE NAPPIS “GREASY” ESSEVI

You sidle through the cafeteria door, head down, hoping no one will notice–

*plunk*

Oh shit the CHORDS.

*“Hey hey you you I don’t like your blackcrush, hey hey you you I think you need to chill out…”*

Shiiiiiiiiiiiiit…


	91. ==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Alesse: Any progress on manifesting yarn that isn't made of murder?

==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

Erithe Probos, from the recon ship, has a pretty decent wool sweater, but IT’S usually mangled from his thruster mishap even when HE isn’t, so most of the yarn pieces you’ve extracted from it have been shorter than desired, and occasionally bloodstained. His socks are in better condition, but – socks.

Doriti Holdas has a very nice intact sweater, but she can’t take it off – it disappears as soon as it goes over her head. If she doesn’t make progress soon you may try to get her to let you unravel it while she’s wearing it.

Hellas can actually manifest yarn! Unfortunately she can only do scratchy, ugly polyester yarn.

The troll they call Caterpillar has a voluminous charcoal gray sweater that swallows her up. You could probably get quite a bit of yarn out of it. Asking her about it has proven difficult, however, as she mostly doesn’t talk.


	92. ==> BE ARADIA [with the terrifying ghost army]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia: Reign in terrifying ghost army. Slightly.

==> BE ARADIA

“New rule! There will be NO attempting anything pulled in the reconnaissance haunting unless I, CG, or CC clear it AHEAD OF TIME.” You give Ashstead and Panthe a particularly pointed glower. “And just… find somewhere unoccupied, if your experimentation might get messy. Not necropath HQ, and NOT MY RESPITEBLOCK.”


	93. ==> BE NEPETA [with virtual shipping wall]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta: Think about shipping wall, and about starting a new one for shipboard.

==> BE NEPETA

There are so many dead and/or secret people to be shipped these days you almost have to have a virtual shipping wall in the dropbox, but you know that would be a TERRIBLE idea. Everyone would flip out. Unless you stuck to people without dropbox access – it’s not like anyone would care you’re shipping your colleague Jorjel with Tavros’s coworker Tiblee (they both just seem really nice!), but what good would that be? You need SOME place to note your hopes for Terezi *diamonds* Tavros without someone getting mad, and do some brainstorming about Equius’s red quadrant. Maybe if you ask nicely Sollux will help you. Though that would probably mean never fully considering the obvious potential in Sollux *spades* disorderlyImpulse, or sketching out all the possible pale configurations of Aradia, Sollux, Karkat, Feferi, and Gamzee.

Maybe you should just use the main dropbox and dare anyone to complain.

* * *

Bonus: Nepeta’s Virtual Shipping Wall

Nepeta <> Equius (obviously!)  
Terezi <> Tavros  
Aradia <> Sollux?  
Sollux <> Karkat?  
Karkat <> Feferi?  
Karkat <> Gamzee?  
Feferi <> Gamzee?  
Vriska <> Erithe Probos?  
Eridan <> Karkat?

Equius <3 Ceriss Lydace?  
Alesse Dalyce <3 Chidro Arctif?  
Gamzee <3 Chidro Arctif?  
Niobie Gilyan <3 Alesse Dalyce?  
Vriska <3 Alesse Dalyce?  
Jorjel <3 Tiblee  
Ashstead <3 Graywire  
Karkat <3 Feferi?  
Aradia <3 Sollux?  
Panthe Silber <3 Perlen Nerrit  
Kanaya <3 Cannis Skaree?

Eridan <3< Mollym Awwakk  
Sollux <3< disorderlyImpulse  
Vriska <3< Niobie Gilyan  
Sharpeye <3< Bonebelt  
Scavenge <3< Ruthless Regulation

Bucket Face c3< Gamzee c3< Greasy  
Everyone c3< Cerull Nuflin c3< Everyone Else


	94. ==> BE BONEBELT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ARADIA'S BOSS: decide which ship can make best use of / be the best victim for / a necropath who comes with a surprising number of ghosts.

==> BE BONEBELT

“Where her boyfriend is?” Scavenge asks. “Do we really want to reward her like that?”

You shrug. “She hasn’t actually done anything wrong. We just need to clean up around here a bit.”

The senior necropaths as a group don’t officially hold any authority, but you’ll give the recommendation to Lepsir at the weekly meeting, and Corpsepap signs what Lepsir gives her without looking.


	95. ==> BE EQUIUS [contemplating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: So what is Equius' opinion on Ghost!Karkat as far as his blood color goes?

==> BE EQUIUS

You are grateful you never found out about Vantas’s blood when he was alive. It would have been… You would have had a responsibility to… But Nepeta… And Vantas himself, he’s one of… (And what if you’d found out while you were a GUEST IN HIS HIVE?)

(No matter what you did, you would have transgressed. And the thought isn’t titillating, it’s just nauseating.)

But he’s dead. And off-spectrum mutants must be culled. There is NOTHING which says ANYTHING about anything more after they are dead.

The whole situation is bizarre, but if it is a problem it is not YOUR problem. And that has to be enough.


	96. ==> BE OLIVE SUPPLIES TECH COUNTALL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius make excuses for why you need computer parts.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> After 0k chapter 75.

==> BE OLIVE SUPPLIES TECH COUNTALL

It’s not the first time a high blue trainee has broken their computer accidentally and needed to get a new one. They don’t usually feel the need to explain what happened to you – it’s not like they’re required to. And when they do, if they lie, they’re usually better at it.

“You tripped while carrying a glass of milk and landed on your husktop?” you confirm. It’s not like it’s even an implausible story, it’s just his delivery.

He sweats.


	97. ==> BE NEPETA [contemplating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta: What would you expect if someone were trying to court you for their flush quadrant?

==> BE NEPETA

You sigh as you and Jorjel heave the cat sculpture into the empty recuperacoon where it will be out of the way. “I know people in movies are always getting jewelry and… gold stuff and all that as quadrant presents, but it’s just not… it’s just not fur me, I guess.”

“What IS for you?” Jorjel asks. “If you dropped some hints, he’d probably go for it…”

You never really did let go of your flushcrush on Karkat – although you guess maybe you should, now that he’s a ghost – but the one non-imaginary red quadrant thing you had on Alternia was with a rustblood with no manners at all and a cholerbear lusus. For the two seasons it lasted, you used to surprise each other with fresh, bleeding carcasses. “Um… I don’t think it would work very well on a ship.”


	98. ==> BE CEPHAL MYCOTA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Courageous troll, request "Somewhere over the rainbow" of the unknown ghost playing guitar.

==> BE CEPHAL MYCOTA

You grew up pretty isolated, and even now don’t get out too much, so unlike (apparently) everyone else on the ship, you were not already tired of amateur guitarists playing Troll Wonderwall. However, it’s been over a week, and whatever ghost is practicing in the biomechanics repair lab needs to get something new.

There’s no need to be rude about it, though. You clear your throat. “Excuse me, ghost guitarist? Do you know ‘Somewhere Over the Rainbow’?”

The music cuts off abruptly. You bet they’ve gone to try to find an arrangement. That’s what YOU’D be doing if someone made a request when you were practicing xylophone.


	99. ==> BE FEFERI [before Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: FEFERI: Reflect on hanging out at Karkat's hive pre-ascension

==> BE FEFERI

“But are you SHORE this is okay?” you ask anxiously. “His hive isn’t nearly as big as Vriska’s, it’s much more of an imposition, and she said I could stay there to practice after she left–” She’d been drunk when she made the offer, and also said something about it being fine if Eridan killed her lusus, but she reiterated the invitation the next night before she took off.

“Yeah, yeah, but her lusus is there, it’s full of… Vris’s stuff, and Kar’s hive is much more convenient to the Conscription platform. The environment will probably be closer to what you’ll have to fight in anyway.”

“But if he already has Vriska inviting herself over for her BUCKETLIST arrangements–”

“Yeah, that’s kinda out there even for her, but look at it this way – he won’t care about a few more people who AREN’T planning BucketList hookups.” Eridan frowns a little. “I bet he’ll have some neighbors who’d leap at the chance to be with a seadweller anyway, and in their own hive.”

This is going to be a disaster.


	100. ==> BE CERULL NUFLIN

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Cerull and Camieo: Argue over who gets first dibs on auspistising Vriska. In a calm, polite, no-mediation-needed way.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Holy crap there's 100 chapters of this. And the 100th one might not make much sense without the information that upon rechecking my notes I discovered that the terrifying ghost army apparently has _two_ ashen two-wheel devices. This is probably just as well.

==> BE CERULL NUFLIN

No no no, you’re not going to do that. Neither of you wants to take on the responsibility for defusing any bad pitch tension Serket ever gets herself into. Mid-blues are high-strung. She needs a moirail for that.

You DO have dibs on Serket and Silber if they stop pretending not to despise each other. It’d be a challenge, but you’re up for it.

Camieo is older – if you count time after death – and had more experience when they were alive, so they’re staying in reserve for the more difficult and more critical job of any necessary auspisticizing between Serket and MEGIDO, or Serket and any of the rest of the mysterious inner circle.


	101. ==> BE ERITHE PROBOS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ghost army: rumor monger about the inner circle

==> BE ERITHE PROBOS

A yellowblood stops you from following Vriska and the seadweller girl who’s drawing her away. “Wait ‘til later,” she advises. “It looks like your friend is part of the Inner Circle.”

She wants you to ask, you KNOW she does, but you do anyway. “Inner Circle?”

She leans forward. “It’s a bunch of people who knew each other before conscription. Megido – the necropath – she’s the center of it, but there’s also CC, that seadweller, and a purple called Gamzee Makara, and the mysterious CG – they aren’t here right now – and some LIVE people, and I guess now Vriska too.”

You almost ask about about ghosts being “not here right now”, but instead go for– “Live people?”

“Oh, yeah. There’s the helmsman of the ‘Unrelenting Persecution’ for sure, and a legislacerator, and this really weird indigo, and there are at least a couple more. They all keep in contact through a secret message drop system! But we keep that pretty quiet, since we’re all here because of them, and most of us owe them BIG time for getting rid of Overbear – we’ll have to tell you about Overbear.”


	102. ==> BE ERITHE PROBOS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Terrifying Ghost Army: debate the most outlandish rumours about the mysterious inner circle

==> BE ERITHE PROBOS

“I think it’s some sort of tragic romance thing,” says the guy in the Alternia’s Got Talent t-shirt. “She’s a seadweller, he’s a lowblood, she sides against other seadwellers a few too many times…”

Hellas scoffs. “Explain the lack of romantic tension, then.”

“I think there’s romantic tension!”

“Honestly I think Perlen knows more than he’s saying, but he owes them even more than the rest of us, so…”


	103. ==> BE PERSONNEL SPECIALIST HORNHAND

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: BE THE PERSON WHO ASSIGNED VRISKA TO HER FIRST (AND LAST) SHIP

==> BE PERSONNEL SPECIALIST HORNHAND

Every single training subgroup leader who’s had Serket has asked not to have her. Some of them claimed she would do better in some other subgroup, but the more honest ones say they don’t want her because she’s a danger to herself and others – or just really annoying.

So, who’s pissed you off most lately… The trainers are suffering enough right now, you’ll make it a full posting. Nothing even nominally supervisory or it’ll come back to bite you…

Ah. Farsight’s recon ship is low on crew again. Perfect. It gets her out of everyone’s hair, and if Farsight gets annoyed, he deserves it.


	104. ==> BE CATERPILLAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Someone in the Ghost Army: Figure out something important. Don't tell anyone.

==> BE CATERPILLAR

You know things.

You were on the Gleeful Abandon a lot longer than Gamzee or Perlen, you’re not sure how long actually, or how you got there, but it was enough time to hear a lot of Surepain’s stories. You know about the Sufferer and the prophecy of the Second Signless. And you pay attention and you’ve been HERE longer than most of the other ghosts, you know CG’s some sort of mutant and that’s why he was culled, and the Empire made a weirdly big deal out of it and it isn’t quite clear why.

And you heard CC whisper to Aradia how hard it was not to manifest a 2x3dent on the Gleeful Abandon, and you pay attention, you know there was a Challenge this round of Conscription.

You never tell.


	105. ==> BE CEPHAL MYCOTA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee actually learns how to play the song requested by that one troll and serenades them with it after they've had a rough shift at work?

==> BE CEPHAL MYCOTA

There are long work shifts, and then there are workshifts spent trying to diagnose and remedy whatever the FUCK the engiviscerators on the Magnificent Marine Predation fucked up with their helmsman. Because shit did they fuck up.

You have what you are told is the best “feel” for biowires anyone has seen outside seadwellers, probably because your lusus was half invertebrate and half fungus, don’t ask. It’s okay, because it at least means you can help make Ananas as comfortable as possible – you just need to be good enough, you don't need to be the best. The best are ALWAYS seadwellers, that’s the rule. But – and here is where the Predation’s helm techs made their mistake – seadwellers are not always the best. Some random seadweller in COMMAND is no more likely to know biowires than – oh – some random midblood BOTANIST. Less so! But the crew here has just been asking the next seadweller up the command ladder of the biowires are acceptable, and the honorable and respected seadweller has been saying they’re fine, and who knows how long this would have gone on if one of the techs hadn’t wised up enough to request a performance consult. This of course identified the OBVIOUS biowire problems. At that point, the issue would ordinarily have been kicked over to Biotechnologist Deepwell, posted on the Gathering Swarm, but see, sending a seadweller would imply the numerous seadwellers already on the Magnificent Marine Predation haven’t been doing their jobs properly (WHICH THEY HAVEN’T), so that’s out of the question unless the situation is much worse. Sending someone lower – like, a teal only a sweep past conscription – is nonconfrontational, just cleanup duty.

So here you are, stuck on a ship with too many seadwellers, dealing with engiviscerators who don’t want to admit they fucked up, a helmsman in constant pain who doesn’t even respond to verbal stimulus, and confused, cranky biowires which don’t ‘like’ the position they’re in but also don’t ‘want’ to change. And you have to be DIPLOMATIC. You couldn’t talk until you were four, you don’t DO diplomatic.

You fall into the loaner recuperacoon after choking down dinner with sore hands (when biowire doesn’t want to be moved it can bite), a sore head, and a sore heart. You want to go home – even your block on the Enthusiastic Violence. You want to tell Ananas about all this, but you don’t want to tell Ananas about all this when you can’t see her face to tell what she’s feeling.

You hate EVERYTHING.

*“Somewhere over the rainbow, way up high…”*

You blink. It’s not the same ship, you’re not even sure it’s the same voice (the guitar seems a little steadier), but– “Thanks!”

You hate everything a little less.


	106. ==> BE COLONEL OVERBEAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: There must have been a point in proceedings where Overbear realised just how completely boned he was - that either it had all come out, or it was just about to, and there was nothing that could save him. I'd really like to see his POV of that moment.

==> BE COLONEL OVERBEAR

You’re annoyed and a little surprised by the inquisitorment summons, but not worried and not shocked. Strait-laced, *feisty* little Hannah attracted some attention with her repeated injuries, and you think one of the medicullers has a legislacerator ashmate or something – someone was keeping the file open. Whatever, it’s nothing to worry about – they have nothing. (Though you did select Equius partially because he’s not the type to go to the medicullers if he has any choice at all, especially once his moirail is out of the picture.)

You’re a little more surprised when they start by asking about, not Hannah, but Chidro. Maybe his five seconds of fame are trying to do him a last favor. But Chidro’s easy enough to explain – anyone could have gotten tired of his songwriting attempts. You certainly did. He had his gifts, but he was *stubbornly* attached to his self-worth as an “artist”.

Then they ask about Hannah, and you ask why they haven’t made any progress identifying the DESPICABLE mutinous piece of trash who targeted her.

They’re supposed to get defensive. Instead, the inquisitormentor just tsks sadly. “Hmm, they never did find out who killed Alesse Dalyce, either.”

(Sweet Alesse, who turned out to be a posthumous huge bitch–) You do not blurt out a question about why they know about that. But you’re afraid your face may have shown it, and you don’t have anything ready to say. The “posthumous huge bitch” line probably wouldn’t be a good idea.

The atmosphere in the block has shifted. This is bad.

“Or Vissin Stuary,” the legislacerator continues, with syrupy false sympathy. “Such a brutal murder. Never solved.”

“Stuary wasn’t a quadrant of mine,” you say quickly. Vissin was actually higher than you, you were extra careful.

“And yet you immediately recognize the name, thirty-seven sweeps after his body was found on another ship,” another legislacerator says.

This is really bad.

And then the door opens, and a particularly large legislacerator swans in carrying Cerull’s statue, with the mace you used for Olrena and Vatren in his free hand and Cangin’s letter opener in his teeth. Right behind him, a particularly small legislacerator is ostentatiously inspecting Chidro’s broken, bloodstained guitar, twirling Alesse’s scarf in the air.

Fuck.

FUCK.


	107. Crushes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: any OC: have a crush on one of the 12 main cast kids

Niobie: I thought I might change my mind given a few more options, but no, Vriska’s still hot.

Erithe: I don’t have a palecrush on Vriska, I just want to tease her out of doing stupid things. …Oh shit, I do.

Chidro: I like Gamzee a lot, but I’m not sure if it’s pale or flush, I’m not sure whether he has a moirail already, I’m not sure how any of this works for ghosts, I’m not sure if he’s in an okay place mentally for romance, and I’m not sure if I’M in an okay place mentally for romance, since I had my entire face smashed in until after Overbear was killed.

Skaree: Is there such a thing as a cahootscrush? I have a cahootscrush on Pyrope.

Relrin: I just really think Ampora and Awwakk would be a disaster if they got together!


	108. ==> BE AURTHOUR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: So Equius's lusus, what have you been up to?

==> BE AURTHOUR

You have been trying to keep your troll and his residence in good order in this… this… This surreal horror show. It’s not easy. And it’s a good thing you weren’t accustomed to congenial company of other lusii, because specimens like the bearshark make your troll’s moirail’s lusus look positively refined.


	109. ==> BE CAPTAIN FARSIGHT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Captain Farsight: get some comeuppance.

==> BE CAPTAIN FARSIGHT

It’s still not entirely clear to you whether you’re being punished because you had so many subordinates die your ship got a horrendous ghost infestation, or because you couldn’t ignore the ghost infestation and finish out the mission. If it’s the former, you want to be pissed about it. It’s not like nobody had the opportunity to tell you to change things earlier. They out-and-out used you to get rid of people!

They’re letting your second-in-command stay with the ship, which is mildly annoying, but you’re glad he’s dodged the worst of it. Sharpwit, Scanfire, and Shredear are being reassigned. You’re doing what you can to keep them not TOO far apart – Byground still owes you a favor for taking the Grope-o-matic off her hands.

You’re going to be teaching bluebloods about reconnaissance. You’ve already gotten three snotty remarks about how they’re not supposed to die in the process.


	110. ==> BE SKELETON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: did alesse's maybedescendant ever find her yarn again?

==> BE SKELETON

Aradia added as an afterthought that there was something else they were hoping to get done on the Brutal Domination – they’d get it done sooner or later, but if you didn’t mind… You agree as soon as she mentions the creamsicles.

The indigo stops dead as she enters her block to find a strange lowblood digging through her mini-thermal hull. “What are you–” And that’s when she realizes you’re dead. When she starts again, it’s a lot less outraged and a lot more wary. “May I ask what you’re doing?”

You pull the yarn out from behind the creamsicles, stand, and lob it lazily across the block. She catches it before it lands on her horns. “Just tidying up!” you say, and vanish from sight.

You linger long enough to watch her carefully close the thermal hull, and stare at the yarn. “What the FUCK.”


	111. ==> BE KARKAT [on the Magnificent Marine Predation]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: CG: investigate the giant cat sculpture.

==> BE KARKAT

You find Nepeta’s block mostly from what you gathered earlier, partially from following a mismatched pair of security guards heading off somewhere. Nepeta isn’t there – maybe on duty? Her blockmate IS there, reading a training manual, so you take care to stay invisible.

That cat sculpture is in an empty recuperacoon, the head rising up past the rim like a monster emerging from the sea. Nepeta said it was cute – just too big – but you’re not buying it.

…Looks like someone’s started to use the recateracoon as random storage, too.


	112. ==> BE SQUADRON HELM COORDINATOR STARSHOT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Whoever decided Sollux should be an intermediate system: Make the decision.

==> BE SQUADRON HELM COORDINATOR STARSHOT

You are a believer in the intermediate system.

(Some might even call you A Believer in the intermediate system.)

Intermediate systems allow for more efficient power distribution than isolated systems, because there’s more feedback. Integrated systems are more efficient still, of course – IF nothing goes wrong. If a helmsman’s conditioning fails, an integrated system is a recipe for disaster. Even if conditioning doesn’t fail, mental or emotional distress can still be reflected in ship performance.

You never authorize an integrated system for a helmsman not demonstrated to be stable and reliable. You don’t go for an isolated system unless a helmsman is difficult. …And there are a few ships where isolated is the kindest thing to do.


	113. ==> BE KARKAT [listening in]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Karkat, learn about the rumor about you and feferi

==> BE KARKAT

You’re just back from the Ruthless Regulation, trying to get a reliable count of how many ghosts you still have, when you hear it.

“So, about CG and CC…”

“I don’t know their real names either.”

“No, I mean, are they… together?”

“Not sure if they ARE, but I think they were, and it got them both killed. Seadweller, lowblood…”

“Oooooooohhhh.”

You bite your tongue. You’re both hemonymous, you’re both going by Trollian handles, you’ve both declined to say how or why you died… This isn’t surprising. And it’s better than anyone guessing the truth.

“What do you think she sees in him?”

That’s just uncalled-for!


	114. ==> BE ATTENDER VIGILANT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Attender Vigilant: subtly investigate something

==> BE ATTENDER VIGILANT

The incubation cavern is almost silent. There’s no equipment here. Just the Matriorb, and Maryam sitting with it, and now you, replacing Attender Faithful for the next six-hour shift.

You are not going to ask about the Second Signless.

You are NOT going to ask about the Second Signless.

You are NOT GOING to ask about the Second Signless.

You are NOT going to ASK about the Second Signless.

YOU ARE NOT GOING TO ASK ABOUT THE SECOND SIGNLESS.

“So, do you intend to keep in contact with people you know in the Fleet?” you ask instead.


	115. ==> BE THE SUREPAIN ON THE ‘SLAUGHTERING ENEMIES WITH GLEEFUL ABANDON’

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I'd really like to see more of the Surepain who comforted Gamzee on the Gleeful Abandon. Maybe why he joined the cult?

==> BE THE SUREPAIN ON THE ‘SLAUGHTERING ENEMIES WITH GLEEFUL ABANDON’

You joined the cult because you believed in justice, all those sweeps ago when you were alive – because it WASN’T RIGHT that everything should hinge on blood color, that everyone should be helpless before the gruesome machinery of the Empire. You still believe in justice. But what’s more important to you now, what keeps you around this hellhole you died in, is the Signless’s COMPASSION.


	116. ==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Awwakk: Ignore the annoying distractions

==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

“Keep it DOWN out here!” you bellow. Whatever the fuck they’ve got on that audio feed is bad enough, especially that last random ‘guilty’ chant thing, but the real kicker is all the jeering and laughing and shrieking over the volume spikes. Why did ANY of these losers make it through the Trials unculled?

You slam the door (as much as you can), and huff. You are too busy for this.

You unpause “Various motorized vehicles are pushed to the furthest extent of their capabilities while color commentary is provided by a ceruleanblood and an oliveblood”.


	117. ==> BE KANAYA [brooding, sort of]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Attendants: Inform us on the care and feeding of a matriorb.

==> BE KANAYA

You are about 95% sure that 80% of the things the Attenders have insisted on doing are not actually necessary. Oh, they have made sure every hint you got from your lusus has been followed EXACTLY, and the setup meets all the requirements you know of – and it took some fiddling to get the temperature exactly right. You just really don’t think the quiet or the lack of electronics are necessary, and you have your doubts about most of the rituals, and you’re sure the isolation is just for secrecy’s sake.


	118. ==> BE EQUIUS [looking back]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Has anyone asked for "Equius: Search through dropbox backlog for mentions of Overbear" yet?

==> BE EQUIUS

When you get your computer repaired, you venture back into the dropbox but can’t bring yourself to say anything after that… mortifying exit. You check the most recent files and find a discussion of the latest “Pupa Pan” film, then check a little farther back and see they know you’re fine (because Captor can talk to this ship’s helmsman, which is… slightly concerning). You still can’t bring yourself to say anything.

Instead you find yourself going further back in the dropbox history, looking for Nepeta’s first appearance. Then back a little further, because no one seems surprised to see Nepeta – of course they’re not surprised, they had to give her access. Pyrope introduced everyone to Nepeta’s predicament, and the Overbear situation in general, and…

You read through the backlog slowly, passing “…”s and unrelated rants and random other things to follow the group’s Overbear strategy.

They worked really hard.


	119. Q&A

**Q: Did scarf-girl's maybe descendant get her yarn back afterwards?**

TA: you want me two what?  
TC: sEnD A MeSsAgE To cErIsS LyDaCe aBoUt wHeRe hEr gOoD YaRn iS  
TC: iTs iN HeR SmAlL ThErMaL HuLl  
TC: iN ThE BaCk  
TC: bEhInD ThE OrAnGe cReAmSiClEs  
TC: :o)  
TA: …  
TC: We cAnT JuSt nOt tElL HeR  
TC: StUfFs eXpEnSiVe  
TC: aNd iT DiSaPpEaReD  
TC: HaS tO Be wOrRyInG  
TA: …  
TA: you realiize gettiing an anonymou2 untraceable me22age about her yarn beiing 2omeplace 2he couldnt po22iibly have put iit wiill make the whole thiing at lea2t eiight tiime2 more worryiing  
TC: …  
TC: :o(  
TA: ugh fiine iill fiigure out 2omethiing

* * *

**Q: Is Karkat at some point going to demand to become the head threshecutioner of Aradia's terrifying ghost army?**

CG: I DON’T THINK ANYONE DARES DEMAND ANYTHING ABOUT THE TERRIFYING GHOST ARMY.  
CG: IT’S JUST THAT TERRIFYING.  
CG: …  
CG: AND IF I WERE GOING TO NO WAY WOULD I SETTLE FOR HEAD THRESHECUTIONER, I’VE BEEN HERE THE LONGEST, I HAVE SENIORITY, I WOULD BE HEAD SENIOR CHIEF GHOSTLEADER AND OFFICIAL PERSON WITH ALL THE FUCKING COMMON SENSE.  
CG: CC CAN BE DEPUTY GHOSTLEADER AND OFFICIAL INSANE IDEA GENERATOR.  
CG: TC IS MORALE OFFICER.  
CG: AA IS… TERRIFYING NON-GHOSTLEADER.

* * *

**Q: Bonebelt, on a scale of "causing nosebleeds" to "welp, it was a nice planet while it lasted", how overpowered is the Demoness? And how does Aradia compare? Could the necropathy department take her if they had to, or are you at her mercy?**

Skeleton: I will be taking this question as the living necropaths are not… completely filled in on that particular subject.  
Skeleton: I don’t think the Demoness’s powers lend themselves to planetary destruction as such.  
[Because no one is going to say the Demoness CAN’T do something.]  
Skeleton: Necropaths are always most devastating against trolls. We can affect nonliving things, we can affect other living things, but we are most effective against trolls.  
Skeleton: If she wanted to, she could likely wrench up every potential ghost a planet has, and haunt its troll inhabitants to destruction. The PLANET would be all right.  
Skeleton: Mercifully, she usually prefers to work on a more personal and local level. I’m not sure if I’ve heard of her taking out more than a ship at once.  
Skeleton: Whether she could be fought… The procedure if the Demoness visits is not to fight, but to placate, deflect, and deescalate.  
[You don’t talk about fighting the Demoness, either. Skeleton’s private opinion is that if it came down to the Demoness trying to destroy the universe or kill the Mother Grub or something, a coordinated effort from all living and dead necropaths in the Fleet could probably stop her. The personnel in one squadron probably wouldn’t slow her down.]  
Skeleton: Aradia is precociously powerful, but at the moment it’s a… sane level of power. I’m stronger than she is, right now. The other live necropaths working together could restrain her at her current level.  
Skeleton: Unfortunately, if she needed to be restrained, it would probably mean she was really irrationally angry, which tends to elevate one’s powers. I don’t know what her rage boost would be. It’s unpredictable.  
Skeleton: Death immediately increases a necropath’s powers by an order of magnitude, and they can continue to grow.

* * *

**Q: Someone who would know: Why has 'Surepain' (and 'Truepain', apparently) gotten such a reputation for being attached to individuals with a particular religious bent? Were the Surepains just really bad at covering their tracks?**

Skeleton: It’s not so much that Sufferists named Surepain are particularly bad at covering their tracks as it is that it has, historically, been a very very popular name for Sufferists.  
Skeleton: Because pain, suffering, they will surely suffer… You get the idea.  
Skeleton: And eventually the authorities picked up on pain, suffering, people might be trying to say something here.  
Skeleton: Of course there are lots of other reasons for trolls to put ‘pain’ in their name, so it’s not condemnable by itself – but it can attract a second look.

* * *

**Q: Tavros: How are your quadrants?**

Tavros: They are basically, um, a blasted wasteland?  
Tavros: One might even say, my quadrants are paralyzed.  
Tavros: I mean it could be a lot worse?  
Tavros: Equius could have gone with his FIRST design, for robolegs, which involved amputation, at the waist, rather than mid-thigh.  
Tavros: But no one is going to be interested in me.  
Tavros: (Tiblee’s adorable, but everyone else thinks so too – Frieas needs to be taken down a peg, but everyone else thinks so too. They are both way out of my league.)  
Tavros: (The thing with Terezi… I don’t know if it’s real or if we’re just both so lonely.)

* * *

**Q: Karkat: was your ascension party meant to be a low blood thing or did it just happen that way. Well, before everyone else showed up.**

Karkat: IT WAS NOT AN ASCENSION PARTY!  
Karkat: Why the fuck would I want to have an Ascension party?  
Karkat: Okay, sure, one last fucking hurrah before my probably inevitable doom, but that would have involved a MOVIE MARATHON, not a… a…  
Karkat: Lowbloods and low midbloods can’t bring their lusii. Nepeta’s would probably be fine just staying in the cave, but Aradia, Sollux, and Tavros hatched this plan to take their lusii somewhere way out in the wilderness, where they’d be in less danger than being left in a hive due to be demolished or somewhere near the Conscription platform, where it would be crazy. Tavros would add some instructions about sticking together, staying safe, getting the stupider one to listen to the smarter one, and so on. They guessed I wasn’t high enough to take my lusus and asked if I wanted in. Of course I did! My lusus was probably more of an abomination than me!  
Karkat: Sollux flew us all out. We got them on their way.  
Karkat: It was… emotionally exhausting. They all gave their powers a workout, too.  
Karkat: My hive was most convenient to the platform, so I said they could crash there. They pretty much had all their luggage with them anyway. Lowbloods can’t take much. Aradia said being in someone else’s hive for drone season wouldn’t be a problem.  
Karkat: So imagine how thrilled I was to boot up my computer to frantic messages from Terezi and Kanaya about how Vriska gave her BucketList contacts MY ADDRESS.  
Karkat: And then SOMEWHAT less frantic messages suggesting that maybe they could stop here, too, since it’s so convenient and all, and also Kanaya has this friend who really needs somewhere to stay on land, and also Gamzee would benefit from being guided through the whole mess…  
Karkat: …I’m actually still not sure how Equius and Nepeta decided my hive was a great place to crash. Maybe Terezi suggested it to Nepeta? Equius was stalking Gamzee?  
Karkat: Anyway it was a FARCICAL CLUSTERFUCK, not a party.  
Karkat: But it did mean I didn’t get outed as an abomination during drone season, thus living a few weeks more to get found out on the platform. So worthwhile.  
Karkat: …Less humiliating way to die, though.

* * *

**Q: Ghosts not attempting to learn to play guitar: what do you think of guitar lessons?**

Karkat: …  
Panthe: Kill me now.  
Graywire: It’s… a change?  
Alesse: I’m going to get them back when I get some yarn.  
Feferi: It’s not THAT bad.  
Ashstead: …Guitar lessons? Does this happen a lot?

* * *

**Q: Hey Corpsepap, thoughts on the ghost army?**

Officer Bluemind: …  
Officer Bluemind: What?  
Officer Bluemind: Ghost army?  
Officer Bluemind: Lepsir, have we got a ghost army?  
Admin Jannin Lepsir: …  
Officer Bluemind: I don’t need to worry about this, do I?  
Admin Jannin Lepsir: …Of course not, sir.


	120. ==> BE ERIDAN / BE FEFERI [thinking back]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: Remember Feferi. (and its twin, Feferi: Remember Eridan.)

==> BE ERIDAN

You used to wish Fef were just a LITTLE lower on the spectrum. Not when you were young and stupid and puffed up with the pride of being the Heiress’s moirail (or maybe something even better), but later, when you were helping her research past Challenges and starting to really GET how tough a fully-grown tyrian is (young tyrians aren’t exactly pushovers either, but that just made it more terrifying watching Heiress after Heiress fall), you wished she were violet, or even that she could pass for violet, so you could protect her.

She’d hate it here, though. And it takes a lot for a young seadweller to get culled for subversion, but you think she might have managed it. And even if she didn’t pick fights with the higher-ups, how she’d react to their PEERS – how they’d react to her – she’d be borderline homicidal over Awwakk’s “matespritship” ALONE–

She wouldn’t have done well as a violet. Part of being Fef was being in a league of her own.

Is. In a weird sort of way.

If the Terrifying Ghost Army does visit, it is going to be a DISASTER.

==> BE FEFERI

Sometimes you wonder how Eridan would cope with being here. It’s not a very big risk, now, but it’s still a risk, and the odd, scrambled, necropaths-on-top hierarchy would be… an adjustment for him.

You think he COULD adjust, though. He’s grown up a lot.


	121. ==> BE KARKAT [pre-trial]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Terrifying Ghost Army: Hang out together before the trial starts?

==> BE KARKAT

You’ve seen more of the ghosts of Overbear’s victims than you really wanted to over the past ETERNITY, and you think you have a pretty good idea of what their normal behavior is. This isn’t normal. This is SIMMERING with tension. Vibrating. You’re not surprised the living can feel it. It would be surprising if they couldn’t. Even the local ghosts seem a little intimidated.

Feferi leans over to you. “Somefin tells me that if they’re like this for the inquisitorment…”

The courtblock is going to be hell. “We should send TC somewhere less insane.”


	122. ==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Scarf Girl: Meet Aradia.

==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

You’ve avoided necropaths as much as you can ever since you managed to recover from BEING DISPELLED, but you still recognize the feel of the pull–

*does anyone know anything about a highblood on the Brutal Domination who preys on conscripts*  
*I want to talk to you*

Well. If you put it THAT way.

You fade into reality in the middle of a bunch of other ghosts who know something about a highblood on the Brutal Domination who preys on conscripts. The necropath is young, probably just past Conscription herself. You can feel the power rolling off her, though.

You wonder why she cares about Overbear.


	123. ==> BE PANTHE SILBER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sulky Psychic Ghost Boy --> Do something about your 'nickname?'

==> BE PANTHE SILBER

Your problem is you have resting bitchface. Amiety used to say you just looked like you were thinking hard, but you’re pretty sure it’s resting bitchface. Or at least resting I-have-a-psychic-bleed-induced-headache-face.

You try smiling instead. You smile REALLY HARD.

Your new middle leaf winces. “Uh, I get what you’re trying to do, but unless you think Creepily Grinning Psychic Boy is an improvement…”


	124. ==> BE KARKAT [on the Magnificent Marine Predation]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Karkat: Yell at living troll who (probably) deserves it.

==> BE KARKAT

“WHAT THE FUCK KIND OF MESS IS THIS?!” you roar, indicating the Magnificent Marine Predation’s unfortunate helmstroll. The tech who just slouched in ten minutes late for the midday shift inhales a mouthful of whatever’s in that mug and spills the rest down his front. You wait for him to mostly finish coughing before continuing, “THIS STANDARD OF WORK IS UNACCEPTABLE! SHAMEFUL! THIS IS THE WORST MAINTENANCE I HAVE EVER SEEN!” You shake a fist, and fade out of sight, before the engiviscerator has a chance to realize you don’t look like the ghost of a senior engiviscerator.


	125. ==> BE MUSTEL KELLEP

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Anyone on the Magnificent Marine Predation - think about how romantic Eridan is.

==> BE MUSTEL KELLEP

You don’t have a lot in common with Ampora – he’s on his way to becoming a fine example of the martial aristocracy, while you’re more of a governor type; you somehow managed to both be interested in history while having absolutely no overlap in what parts of history you’re interested in; he goes for jewelry and colors and you think you’ve seen a CAPE, while you prefer sober and respectable; he’s actually trying to awkwardly pitchflirt with Awwakk instead of trying to avoid her. But – unlike almost all the other younger seadwellers here – he understands a quadrant is to be cherished and tended, not browbeaten or coerced. He understands ROMANCE. (It makes you feel less like you’ve become something horrible, keeping your moirail close.)

(Jorjel did mention in confidence that some of the statues were getting a little inconveniently large to have around midblood security quarters. It would have been nice if she’d mentioned it a little sooner, before you commissioned something similar for your own matesprit… Oh well. Legislacerator trainees probably have more space anyway, don’t they?)


	126. ==> BE TEREZI [watching a delivery]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Skaree: Be... Thrilled?

==> BE TEREZI

You are deliberately focusing on your reading and not your blockmate, but that falls apart when Skaree answers the door and makes a truly UNIQUE noise. Has Pappad finally come up with some serious retaliation?

No, it’s a shiny… big… gold… sculpture… thing. You can’t make out the shape of the whole sculpture, but the violet heart in the middle is clear enough. Oh, my.

And there’s a robot behind it… “Do we have a delivery?” you ask. “Is it for me?”

“Delivery for Cannis Skaree,” the robot intones.

Skaree lets out a sort of high-pitched whimper, but presents her thumb for authentication.

“Where are you going to put it?” you ask brightly. You can’t seem to stop yourself.

“Message accompanying delivery,” says the robot. “Hearts you forever, hug hug kiss kiss, hearts hearts, Mustel.”

It leaves without waiting for a return message, apparently oblivious to Skaree shouting after it, “Tell him RESPECTFULLY that he’s a damn SAP!”

You still have a big gold… dog sculpture…? halfway through your block door.


	127. ==> BE BACKWING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Anyone on the Magnificent Marine Predation - contemplate Nepeta's appeal

==> BE BACKWING

Leijon is a nice kid. You’re not a hundred percent sure what Ampora sees in her, which is more of a problem then it would be in some more SANE assignment, because it’s your job to keep an eye on all these posting-influencing relationships to make sure you have plenty of warning if they go sour. You have to spend way too much time snooping security logs to try to follow what’s going on. Your current best guess at what he sees in her that he likes is “cute”, “feisty”, and “puns”.


	128. ==> BE GAMZEE [socializing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee: make new friends

==> BE GAMZEE

Most of the new bunch of ghosts around are a little upSETTINg, because they’re bloODY and HURTING and that’s WRONG and it’s ALL WRONG and anyway everyone mostly tells you to go sit with Skyflare and you usually do.

You don’t avoid the girl so much because she’s… actually not bloody at all, though her face sometimes looks funny, and sometimes her scarf is twisted up nasty.

“Do you have a name besides Scarf Girl?” you ask at one point.

“Do you have a name besides Sad Crazy Clown Guy?” she parries. You laugh.


	129. ==> BE BACKWING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Backwing: Wonder How To Handle The Incoming Pyramid of Kitsch.

==> BE BACKWING

It’s not the first time there’s been a ~trend~ of large, extravagant gifts. It’s the reason you generally put fewer people in a block than should be there, according to the schematics. You make sure the gifts get left as officially the seadweller’s property in case of cargo audit – none of them have hit their limit in your entire career – and that takes care of it.

This latest round is… a LITTLE larger than usual. You’re glad Kellep’s matesprit is on a different ship.

You strongly suspect Awwakk is planning to present Hesten the motorized two-wheel device she’s been building, which is… well. She DOES value him, in… her own way.

(You have to look on the bright side, in this job, or you’ll go insane.)


	130. ==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: a jam with terezi and tavros?

==> BE PAST CANNIS SKAREE

You angle your tablet carefully so the reflection gives you a decent view of the scriptormentium without poking your head out of the study cube. Pyrope is secretly electronically communing with the maintenance guy again. It’s always the same guy – brownblood, young, big horns and robolegs. He might be a useful vulnerable point…

…But you can’t quite bring yourself to seriously consider targeting people for who their quadrants are. Even though you NEED to beat Pyrope… you’re not there yet.

==> BE SLIGHTLY LESS PAST CANNIS SKAREE

Note to self: Do not EVER try to get at Pyrope by targeting her friends. Whatever is going on she definitely knows someone terrifying. Keep it aboveboard and one-on-one.

Yikes. It’s not often you feel like your scruples, such as they are, kept you OUT of trouble… but yikes.

==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

You think at this point Pyrope should just go ahead and register her diamond with Maintenance Robolegs Nitram. She’s probably past the worst danger, he’s got the medicullers protecting him, and it would mean they could keep communicating privately after the scriptormentium renovation is finished.

…Assuming it ever IS finished.


	131. ==> BE NEPETA [making do]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta: Have a feelings jam with Equius.

==> BE NEPETA

Jorjel has cleared out to give you some time alone with your… computer.

It’s not like you don’t have plenty of experience with the long-distance thing. Sometimes it felt like you almost never got to see each other in person on Alternia, a season on the same ship shouldn’t override that. You both know the drill.

Still sucks, though.


	132. ==> BE AN INNOCENT BYSTANDER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Bucket Face: Contemplate the your ashen quadrant. Can you even be quadranted to a ghost?

==> BE AN INNOCENT BYSTANDER

You are really wishing the intoxicantblock wasn’t quite so crowded. You do not need to be sitting next to a helmstech drinking way too much gin cut with Faygo and crying into his baked twisted small bread snacks.

“It’s just so awful,” he moans. “I’m not even pitch for Essevi, he’s just an asshole! But we can’t even be in the same room without–” He gestures wildly, almost knocking over his drink. “Ashen love songs! Everywhere!”

You try to edge further away.

“And you’d think, you’d think everyone else would be annoyed, wouldn’t you? Instead they’re all, I never used to like this song, and, oh it’s the helpful ghost, and, when the necropath comes by we should keep this one. Bastards.”


	133. ==> BE JORJEL INDERC

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta's coworkers: gossip

==> BE JORJEL INDERC

“Soooo…” Hesten says as you start trudging along the far end of seawater environmental recycling, “about your blockmate.”

You sigh. “What about my blockmate? Keeping in mind that I am not her confidante or a psychic.” (You do have a decent psychic in your cohort, but she’s stubborn about mind-reading for gossip purposes.)

“Has she given in to what’s-his-name yet?”

You consider reminding him that not all relationships are like his relationship, but decide that would be mean. “Nope. But she’s been smiling when his name comes up.” Frequently in a sort of “amused tolerance for seadweller nonsense” way, but it beats the cautious reserve she had when she got here.

Hesten snorts. “~Romance~ triumphs, huh?”

It would probably be mean to comment too much on that, too. “I just hope he stops inspiring Mustel with terrible over-the-top gift ideas before his matesprit flips black on him.” Again. It never lasts long, but Mustel is inconsolable while it does.


	134. ==> BE KANAYA [brooding, sort of]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: Tend the Matriorb.

==> BE KANAYA

This is what you promised your lusus you would do.

This is an honor.

This is the highest honor a jadeblood can aspire to.

You are doing everything perfectly, because you cannot afford to fail. And you ARE doing everything perfectly. You are on top of this.

It is your duty and your honor and your responsibility and OH FUCK YOU ARE SO BORED.

When Kebela arrives with your food delivery, checks to make sure no on is watching, and slips you a few pieces of paper, whispering “Perses wrote down your messages,” you’re so grateful you could KISS her.

(You don’t, obviously. But that’s how grateful you are.)


	135. ==> BE EQUIUS [pining]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius - think about Eridan, Nepeta, and Eridan-and-Nepeta.

==> BE EQUIUS

Ampora is going to forget it’s a ruse. You KNOW Ampora is going to forget it’s a ruse. He’s already forgetting.

You also know that if he is ever inclined to do anything out of line, the “terrifying ghost army” is more than enough to terrorize him back into line.

You ALSO know that some part of Nepeta is forgetting it’s a ruse, too. If they get to the point of posing as a relationship rather than a courtship, there are going to be real feelings in there.

You don’t know how you should feel about all this. Ampora isn’t good enough for Nepeta. No one is good enough for Nepeta. But Nepeta set up a rationing system for your opinions on her other relationships, so you don’t want to say so unless it’s really urgent.

You just wish she were closer to home.


	136. ==> BE SOLLUX [being social?]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sollux: make a new friend

==> BE SOLLUX

You are not making new friends. At all.

…True, it took embarrassingly little argument for loopyFruits to talk you into a “I’m not a spaceship I’m just stuck to one” club. Mostly it was her description of how people calling her by the name of the ship STILL makes her want to set their hair on fire, and it’s stressful, and she wishes it didn’t bother her so much, and at the same time is terrified of it stopping bothering her so much. You get that.

She’s a good source of information on squadron gossip, especially on the other helmsmen (you’re going to have to be careful not to drop “Ruthie” accidentally), and she knows a trustworthy biotechnologist in the form of her moirail-or-matesprit-or-“Cephal’s upbringing was a little odd”. You MAY even tell her your name, in a while.

…And you have to admit to looking forward to disorderlyImpulse’s termite complaints.


	137. ==> BE OLRENA PITWEL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Outsider: be invested in catfish

==> BE OLRENA PITWEL

“I KNOW how it started, Essyet, that doesn’t mean it can’t become MORE,” you say. “Lots of perfectly good relationships started out for pragmatic reasons. I think they’re falling for each other already.”


	138. ==> BE HELLAS ESSYET

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Terrifying Ghost Army: More ridiculous theories. (Hopefully about the inner circle's origin story?)

==> BE HELLAS ESSYET

You wave a hand impatiently as Chidro and Olrena start trying to talk over each other. “Go over the information again, please.”

The oliveblood boy looks a little intimidated. “I… don’t know that much?” he says. “Just that Vriska said Megido had her haunted, and then she – Vriska – tried to use Megido’s boyfriend to kill her…”

“Probably the helmsman,” Panthe says.

“I know something more than that,” says the olive girl. “She said it was the tail end of a revenge cycle. Paralysis, maiming, blinding, haunting, attempted murder by mind-controlled boyfriend, and then she had some sort of revelation about not trying to kill people if she didn’t want them dead. That’s why she brought it up – she was saying that if she’d learned not to kill people if she didn’t want them dead, the crew really should have learned the same thing.”

“Paralysis and– Robolegs!” you say, delighted.

“And legislacerator girl!” Camieo agrees. You high-five.

Panthe cranes his neck to look after the Inner Circle, wherever they went. “No wonder they seem a little weird about the new girl.”


	139. ==> BE NEPETA [with company]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta's dormmates, trade stories on embarrassing quadrant shenanigans.

==> BE NEPETA

Lately, Drink About Our Quadrants Night has been dominated by Briate – well, Briate was always fairly PROMINENT, but now that his auspisticeship seems to be going to pieces, he’s dominating even more. You can’t really blame him. The whole having sex in his bunk thing was kind of over the top. But it’s not very cathartic for anyone else.

So, Jorjel is hosting an under-the-table Drink About Quadrants Other Than Briate’s, for the midbloods and lowbloods. In your block. Which is a little awkward, but at least you can show off the… sculptures.

“Wow,” one of the teals says. “That’s… shiny.”


	140. ==> BE SHARPEYE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Terezi's supervisor after the trial

==> BE SHARPEYE

Well. That was... invigorating. Also messy – the janitors will have an interesting time of it.

Now you can turn your attention to getting Pyrope securely in the inquisitorment track before someone else snaps her up. Because after this, there WILL be other interested parties.


	141. ==> BE NEPETA [spectating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: That One Seadweller, We All Know Who: Give your moirail a gift that proves you're the most loving and considerate moirail ever. Make it lavish.

==> BE NEPETA

“Um… what’s that?” you venture.

Jorjel sighs and opens the box. “Gift. I guess he felt like he was neglecting me since he was sending Skaree all that stuff. Fortunately he’s a little less ridiculous about it with me…”

The gift is a personalized uniform jacket, in gleaming leather, with Jorjel’s sign sewn on the breast and a pattern or olive and violet diamonds around all the edges. It looks like it’s been lined with something, too, for the generally chilly ship. Jorjel shrugs it on – perfect fit – and tests out what look like deep pockets. She pulls out a bag of gourmet candy and a note, on top of the note with the box.

Jorjel smiles fondly. “SUCH a sap.”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Kellep has no sense at all with red quadrant gifts, but he does know how to shop for his moirail.


	142. ==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Terrifying ghost army: attempt to figure out how the inner circle all got to this point in their lives. Come up with some really, really weird explanations.

==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

You and Panthe are coaching Hellas and Camieo through starting out in the sandbox, Chidro sitting by fiddling with his guitar and Perlen tucked into a corne, when Olrena bounds through the wall. “I figured it out!” she says, mostly to Chidro (only fair, as mostly Chidro’s the only one who wants to hear it).

“Figured what out?” Chidro says.

“Why no one uses CC or CG’s names!”

Hellas sighs. “This is going to play into the whole tragic romance thing, isn’t it.”

Olrena ignores her. “There was another guy who wanted in CC’s red quadrant, one of those low-seadweller high-purple types who have trace fins AND chucklevoodoos. And he or she–”

“Oh no.”

“After culling them in a jealous rage, he or she used chucklevoodoos to make EVERYONE FORGET THEIR NAMES.”

“Everyone hasn’t forgotten their names,” Perlen says from his corner. No one pays any attention.


	143. Q&A II

**Q: Jadeblood: contemplate "perfect"**

Perses: I’m… mostly sure it’s really a thing, not just another superstition?  
Perses: I mean it seems pretty logical that the Mother Grub would have really exacting blood preferences?  
Perses: I know outside of the ‘perfect’ group, who’s a jadeblood is a lot more subjective than anyone would like to admit.  
Perses: I mean, I was identified as jade, I have a jade sign, no one would say I look like anything but jade, but I’m photophobic. Awkward.

* * *

**Q: Backwing: Recall past nice, healthy relationships. The bright stars. The one that didn't give you more work, thank God.**

Backwing: Every relationship gives me more work. That’s my job. Not officially, but – that’s my job.  
Backwing: Some of them don’t give me any more stress, though!  
Backwing: Honestly most of the moirallegiances aren’t bad. The ones that ARE bad are REALLY bad, but mostly they’re fine.  
Backwing: …And a pale breakup is never pretty, either. Happily those aren’t terribly common.  
Backwing: Ash usually isn’t a problem, though Briate seems to be trying to make up for that.  
Backwing: The concupiscent quadrants are stickier.  
Backwing: …No pun intended.  
Backwing: But some of them are still fine!

* * *

**Q: Attendants: Is the mother grub aware that there is a Matriorb? Has she been acting differently?**

Vigilant: …  
Vigilant: …Possibly.  
Vigilant: It’s… difficult to tell.  
They say she used to communicate more, but…

* * *

**Q: Equius: What would someone need to do in order to be good enough for Nepeta? Also, if no one's good enough for Nepeta's other quadrants, then isn't that going to make her life a little awkward at best?**

Equius: …  
Equius: …  
Equius: …  
Nepeta: That’s where the opinion rationing comes in.  
Nepeta: He doesn’t have to be purrfectly happy about the people in my quadrants.  
Nepeta: He just needs to not interfere, and be happy that I’m happy.  
Equius: …

* * *

**Q: Eridan or Aradia: What do you want in a matesprit?**

Eridan: I – what – I don’t know!  
Eridan: Stuff!  
Eridan: Someone interested in me!

Aradia: …  
Aradia: Someone who respects me and understands me but isn’t afraid of me.

* * *

**Q: Attendant: As far as you can tell, what are the requirements for the Matriorb?**

[AN: I just made practically all of this up in the last half-hour and reserve the right to change it if I feel like it.]

Kebela: Er… There are requirements and requirements.  
Kebela: It requires an ambient temperature of between 24.6 and 26.1 degrees centigrade. No direct sunlight. It must not be sitting in water, but it has to be bathed in water of appropriate pH and mineral content at least three times an hour, and at least once an hour must be bathed in a mixture of forty-eight parts satisfactory water to one part perfect jade blood. It should not be exposed to high frequency noise or any noise of over 93 decibels, but must be exposed to sound of at least ten decibels every ten minutes.  
Kebela: It must be kept in the caverns with no light permitted except candles, the water must come from a particular cavern spring, no one must speak above a whisper except when carrying out ritual chants, no electronics and especially no biotech are allowed in its presence.

* * *

**Q: Other Jadebloods in the caverns: Wondeer if there is any correlation between the second Signless and the existence of the new Matriorb.**

Vigilant: I CAN’T.  
Vigilant: The only place we can speak freely about the Sufferer is the Innermost Chamber, in the presence of the Mother Grub, and we’re NOT supposed to mention the Matriorb there!  
Vigilant: …Although I suppose electronics are forbidden from the Matriorb’s chamber, too, so that might be all right.  
Vigilant: I still can’t talk about it with who I’d like to talk about it with because they’re Outer Caverns.  
Vigilant: I think it’s a gift. A second chance.  
Vigilant: Instead of bringing about the end of the world, the Second Sufferer died, but he sent us this new hope for surviving – and now he’s a spirit, watching to see what we do with it.  
Vigilant: I think we’re meant to act.  
Vigilant: I’m… kind of afraid we’re meant to leverage our control of the Mother Grub to take over the Empire, but I REALLY don’t think that would turn out well, so I’m trying to come up with saner things we might be meant to do.

* * *

**Q: Terrifying ghost army: Assume everyone was quadrented with everyone else. Try to hammer out the relationships.**

Hellas: I don’t think they were all necessarily quadranted.  
Chidro: So CC and CG were red – or MAYBE pale–  
Alesse: Equius and Nepeta were – are – definitely pale.  
Hellas: I’ll give you that one.  
Doriti: Who?  
Panthe: Catgirl and Weird Indigo. AC and CT.  
Doriti: Oh, right.  
Panthe: I think Weird Seadweller was CC’s moirail.  
Chidro: Red, then. What about our glorious leader and TA?  
Camieo: I think they’re leaving that deliberately ambiguous…  
Erithe: But what about Vriska and GC – the blind legislacerator?  
Chidro: Black.  
Alesse: Red.  
Cerull: Pale.  
Panthe: Just to cover all the possibilities, I’ll say ashen, with… Robolegs.  
Niobie: Considering she’s not allowed to talk to him, that would be a weird auspisticeship.  
Hellas: You all need to get a grip.


	144. ==> BE NEPETA [connecting]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta: meet new quadrant corners

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Nepeta's new quadrants corners are the creation of Shadow_of_Quill and may be found [here](http://archiveofourown.org/series/378322)!

==> BE NEPETA

In an ideal world, you could meet Derzei and Girraf in person. As it is, you have to message them – message Derzei, anyway. The etiquette’s easiest, there. He seems level-headed enough to be a good middle leaf, and aware of Equius’s eccentricities, as well as other things. You hadn’t realized other people would be so invested in Equius’s quadrants, though you guess it makes sense.

He seems to be half-expecting you to freak out when he drops a mention of his color. You just give him another :33.


	145. ==> BE SUKETS PAPPAD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Pappad: attempt revenge

==> BE SUKETS PAPPAD

It is not about revenge, it’s about winning. Or at least, if you can’t win, making sure Skaree doesn’t, after she made you miss a load of classes and two courtblock sessions with that damned poisoned stylus. You SHOULD be up at the head of the class. You’re not.

You break into her block to sabotage her recuperacoon. Unfortunately, it turns out there is some sort of supplemental security system, and you end up twitching on the floor until you can drag yourself away.

That was probably Pyrope’s work.


	146. ==> BE SOMEONE SAFELY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PACK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: legislacerator trainees: gossip

==> BE SOMEONE SAFELY IN THE MIDDLE OF THE PACK

You know there are a lot of reasons for people to try to be the best, but that’s not you. It’s so, so not you. (Your way is also a lot safer when you’re sharing a block with Pappad.)

“So,” one of your comrades in low-profile says, “did Skaree really snap and beat Pappad unconscious?”

“No, he got zapped, and I bet he was trying to break into Skaree’s block – which is also Pyrope’s block–”

“Ooops.”


	147. ==> BE CAVIAH LEAENA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Caviah: Have a good day.

==> BE CAVIAH LEAENA

Alkaid makes big, sad eyes at you, which looks hilariously wrong with his permanent snarl, not to mention the ruffiannihilator uniform. And you’re feeling maybe… slightly more energetic, so you agree to accompany him to “stand by to summon medical aid” while he brushes his lusus’s teeth. His lusus is a sharkbear. Contrary to his dramatics beforehand, he seems to have the procedure down pretty well, but it’s still… something to see, especially when the lusus starts pawing at Alkaid’s hair halfway through.


	148. ==> BE TAVROS [being flirted with?]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: be asked about budding pale romance

==> BE TAVROS

“Sooooo…” Frieas says, dropping down next to you and slinging an arm over your shoulders like you’re much better friends than you are (ARE you friends?). “An inquisitorment trainee, huh?”

Oh, no. Well, you knew this was coming, after Terezi said her fellow trainees had noticed. Don’t deny, try not to confirm. “What about her?”

“You gotten her into a pile yet?” He actually waggles his eyebrows at you. “Are tealbloods as high-strung as mid-blues? Can you keep her pacified, or should I maybe–”

You punch him in the face.

You’re pretty sure Nineeyes won’t have a problem with it.


	149. ==> BE GAMZEE [thinking]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Gamzee: think about quadrants

==> BE GAMZEE

Man, you don’t know what the hell is up with quadrants these days. You’re not sure you ever did, but it’s definitely more confusing now. Equius and Nepeta are still diamonds forever, that hasn’t changed, but now Nepeta and Eridan have a maybe-fake cahootsheart? And Nepeta thinks you might be pale with Karkat, or maybe Feferi? And there might be something with Tavros and Terezi? And Vriska and Panthe and Cerull? And now on top of that Tavros could be getting a kismesis.

Quadrants are confusing.


	150. ==> BE SKELETON

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius get ordered around by a dead troll

==> BE SKELETON

You give the blueblood standing petrified in the middle of his respiteblock a friendly smile. He sweats.

“I’m told you have trouble controlling your reaction to lowbloods giving orders,” you say. “I think to fully cover the issue, we’re going to have to check out your reaction both to orders you can’t obey and orders to do things you really do need to do.”

“Urk,” he says.

“And things you have a choice about… All right, I order you to wipe your face.”

This is hilarious, but you ARE taking the job seriously.


	151. ==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Briate: attempt to full your pale quadrant

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This was prompted/answered before *violent night* (1).

==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

You need a moirail. You really need a moirail. You’ve always been pretty stable for a highblood but you swear you can feel your sanity eroding away under Cappul and Taggue’s… stuff. You need HELP. You don’t have any. Unless you count your blockmate, but he just complains back at you.

To add insult to injury, you are constantly surrounded by top-quality moirails you are not allowed to poach.


	152. ==> BE EQUIUS [grieving]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius, how did you react when you found out Gamzee was dead? I know you talked to him daily as kids and you probably weren't expecting your higher up friends other than feferi to die before you

==> BE EQUIUS

You found out about Makara dying not long after it happened, from the weekly updates to the squadron death records, which some of your new neighbors enjoy reading recreationally in the diningblock. It was a surprise, but not… as much of a surprise as it could have been, that he’d died in an accident. Makara was never a very careful person. The Fleet is not a forgiving environment. High blood may get you a second chance from a troll, but not from a spaceship.

It was… more of a surprise to find out the “accident” was directly troll-caused and borderline deliberate. Surely that shouldn’t happen to highbloods? But by then you’d found out about Colonel Overbear, and…

The Fleet is dangerous and difficult without exception.


	153. ==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Skaree: realize that you and Trezei know people who know each other

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This and following sections come AFTER vviolent night (2) (unless otherwise specified).

==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

You realize in the back of your mind that it’s probably not a coincidence Pyrope is glued to her tablet at the some time you’re hunched over your computer (messaging Mustel, and Jorjel because she has most of the sense between the two of them, and also YOUR moirail because you need not to freak out right now). After things have settled down, and everyone you care about is all right, you give it a little more thought, and reread all the messages carefully.

Pyrope definitely knows one of Mustel’s classmates, and probably knows Jorjel’s blockmate. But the question is, do you mention it? It would require admitting you know Mustel and Jorjel, and while Pyrope could probably figure it out herself, you still balk at admitting that sort of weakness–

You stop and kick yourself, mentally. You have REGISTERED QUADRANTS. ANYONE can see that weakness. So…

You sit back from your computer, rub your face, and look across the block at Pyrope. “Fucking seadwellers, huh?”


	154. ==> BE ERITHE PROBOS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ghost army: wonder about possible pale orgies/ poly relationship among "the inner circle"

==> BE ERITHE PROBOS

You’re not sure how you got into this conversation and you wish you knew how to get out of it.

“No WAY!” Olrena shouts. She tries to slam a fist down on the table but goes through it. “That is OUT of the question!”

“You’re just saying that because you’re so attached to your redshipping,” Doriti says. “It’s not unheard of. Maybe you haven’t been around long enough to have seen it–”

“This is not about age, this is about not being – licentious–”

“There’s no need to get insulting!”

Vriska pops up next to you – through the floor, maybe you can get out that way. “What’s all the shouting about?”

“Doriti just suggested all of you are in a big pale tangle,” you tell her. “Olrena is horrified. No one else wants to argue about it.”


	155. ==> BE ERIDAN [regrouping]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: revise highblood survival strategy. Try to think of seadweller allies.

==> BE ERIDAN

This whole thing is whole fucking insane, you don’t quite know what to do with it.

You wish you knew for sure how much Awwakk’s going to get in trouble. She was… sort of… avenging her matesprit, and she didn’t attack anyone senior, so she might be okay? You don’t know. You’re not sure if you still have a blackcrush on her or not.

Kellep is disposed to like you, because of how ~romantic~ you’ve been. He’s probably a good connection to cultivate. He’s not any more powerful than you are, though.


	156. ==> BE JORJEL INDERC

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta's blockmate: So, clearly Nepeta knew this ghost when he was alive. Thoughts on that?

==> BE JORJEL INDERC

It’s not like you’ve never seen a ghost before, but you never saw one like this. He was practically like a live person, just slightly transparent and with white eyes, and maybe a little blurry around the edges. And of course your shovel went right through him without a ripple. You apologized reflexively, and he brushed it off.

Nepeta seemed only a little surprised to see him. And he seemed very interested in reading over her shoulder.

“So, had you known that ghost a long time?” you venture. “And he knows your other friends?”

She hesitates, then replies, “Well, one of my furriends is a necropath…”


	157. ==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Briate: Consider options for your very very long life ahead of you

==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

Hesten wanted to be an archeradicator. He would’ve been really good at it, too.

You… you never really had aspirations like that. Subjugglation never interested you, and your chucklevoodoos are hardly worthy of the name. Ruffiannihilation – meh. You prefer averting mayhem to causing it, or you never would have devoted so much time and effort to Cappul and Taggue. There’s command training, you guess. You don’t know how people get started in that, how strictly ordered the training is – COULD you jump in now, even with the brood behind you? or would you have to wait for the next round? or would they make accommodations and offer special catch-up training, since you’re purple?

You’ll have to ask someone. You’re not sure who.


	158. ==> BE BACKWING

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Backwing: consider a less stressful job, like tightrope-walking across a volcano.

==> BE BACKWING

Hesten’s matesprit wants all of his belongings, so there’s no difficult decisions to be made there, anyway. You get someone else to pack it all up so Briate doesn’t have to. Then you go and check out the repairs in progress from the explosions.

You never realized Sennet and Sessor had the potential to turn out like THIS.

…You might be able to get a transfer to somewhere else. You’re not sure you could get a good recommendation, though, because your current commander doesn’t want to find someone else to do your job.


	159. ==> BE GHOST OVERBEAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Ghost overbear,very briefly wonder why the law finally got you before the ghosts get you

==> BE GHOST OVERBEAR

Holy shit that’s a lot people you recognize–


	160. ==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Awwakk: Be furious

==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

How could he. How COULD he? He was more important to you than anyone else! You would have done ANYTHING to keep him safe! And he just – just – just–

At least you got to set Sennet on fire for him.


	161. ==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Briate: fuck it, fuck everything, poach a moirail

==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

Cheating on a seadweller quadrant can get you KILLED, even if you’re pressured into it by someone else up-spectrum, and YOU ARE NOT THAT KIND OF PERSON. You’ve never claimed to be perfect, but you’re not that.

But when Cirrus drops down next to you with all her midblue-psychic knowingness and murmurs, “YOU need a pile, and my moirail likes to watch,” well…


	162. ==> BE TAGGUE SESSOR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Cappul and/or Taggue: Consider how things ended up this way

==> BE TAGGUE SESSOR

Things were always going to end this way.

You and Cappul have always been the best possible rivals, and this is the thing you have always been best at rivaling in.

You don’t know why you let that boring lump Briate get in the way as long as you have.

You’re going to make sure you never do again.


	163. ==> BE BLUBRUSH

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we get a pov of a subjuglator who survived their sweeps as a new recruit?

==> BE BLUBRUSH

Deep down in your blood pusher, you know that if you’d been sent to the Gleeful Abandon as a new recruit, you wouldn’t have done so well either. But you weren’t. You spent your first ten sweeps on the much smaller, training-dedicated Mirthful Maturation, until they decided you were seasoned enough to test on the Gleeful Abandon. Where you did very well, even when others floundered, but – it was after ten sweeps of Fleet experience.


	164. ==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Awwakk: Survive?

==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

They let you off with a reprimand. You’re not sure whether it’s for breaking lockdown or setting the water on fire. You didn’t break any actual rules with the latter, but people sure seem upset about it. Bissel had a complete freakout over it and now refuses to speak to you, so there’s one plus to the whole debacle.

(Your matesprit has never been something you couldn’t live without.)

(You’re still so pissed off about this.)


	165. ==> BE HIGHTIDE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Psych evals: Happen

==> BE HIGHTIDE

Dealing with the psycholigarchists is such a pain in the ass. Most of them are jumped-up bluebloods salivating over the excuse to judge seadwellers, most of the rest are purplebloods trying to “find therapeutic applications” for chucklevoodoos, and the handful of seadwellers are the WORST OF ALL. But the thing with Sessor and Sennet was such a disaster you don’t really have a choice.

They don’t THINK you have any more ticking time bombs. You hope they’re right.

They also think a lot of other things you really don’t have time for, but have to read about anyway.


	166. ==> BE HESTEN BOETIA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Hesten: Says goodbye, then go fuck up psychopathic seadweller intent on killing your block mate.

==> BE HESTEN BOETIA

You ignore Mollym’s increasingly frantic messages, close your computer, and pick up your harpoon gun. Then you pick up your favorite handgun, then your compact crossbow, then your old recurve you don’t get to use much shipboard. Then you tie your hair back with a bandanna.

“What the fuck are you doing?” Briate asks. “I told you to hide in your recuperacoon or something, they might not look for you.”

“That’s a crap shoot and you know it,” you reply. “And not one I’m interested in.”

You break down your own door – it’s not like it would keep them out anyway – and go to meet them.


	167. ==> BE PSYCHOLIGARCHIST DEEPDRIL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Someone: be the psycholigarchist evaluating "Ampora, Eridan"

==> BE PSYCHOLIGARCHIST DEEPDRIL

You were hoping for Bissel – he’s going to be hilarious – but you can tell just from passing through the same block that Awwakk would get on your nerves, so you guess this is a good compromise. Ampora has a flag on his file due to his previous moirallegiance with/unrequited red feelings for the late Heiress. So you start out asking about his current red interest.

He gets really flustered and refuses to “justify his feelings to any landdweller”.

You push him until you get a better feel for the faultlines and weak points lying under the surface. There’s the… potential for something dangerous there, but you think it’s mostly overgrown by maturity. Still, probably best to keep him with a pliable midblood matesprit, if feasible.


	168. ==> BE HESTEN BOETIA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Hesten: Contemplate feelings for block mate

==> BE HESTEN BOETIA

You and Briate might be closer if you let him get closer. A couple of times he’s practically made pale overtures – but you’re pretty sure it’s just because he’s desperate. You don’t think you’re suited to stabilizing anyone else. If you were, maybe you’d have won an argument with Mollym occasionally and you might not… things might be different.

But he is probably the closest friend you have. He doesn’t feel sorry for you, because he’s too busy feeling sorry for himself about HIS quadrants – and you know you DESERVE the sympathy, but it’s nice to get a break. And he got into his problem quadrant on purpose, back in the beginning, to keep two dangerous trolls from making each other even more dangerous to everyone around. He’s a good guy, you think.

A good cause.


	169. ==> BE HESTEN BOETIA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Hesten: describe your feelings concerning your matespritship and explain how things got so bad and why.

==> BE HESTEN BOETIA

Things were fine, to start with, back on Alternia. She’d fly her plane and you’d shoot things. You’d help her with lifting heavy machinery if she needed it. You had some good times.

But then came Conscription, and she KNEW you wanted to go into the Archeradicators, she KNEW how good you’d be at it, and she STILL INSISTED YOU STAY WITH HER. It’s not like the matespritship couldn’t have been registered if you’d gone where you belonged! But she just wouldn’t let you go. You were HERS. You weren’t allowed to be anything else. If you had other ideas, who cares – not her.

You flipped black and she didn’t even fucking ACKNOWLEDGE it, that was how little she cared about how you felt.

Your hatred burned out after a while, into cold resignation. You can summon up a little pity for how CLUELESS she is, but not enough to make a quadrant. Your quadrant is all in Mollym’s head – and in the official records, and in the FUCKING bulky bracelets she gives you even though she knows they mess up your draw, they’re practically manacles, and in the damn FUTURE.

She’s going to be so pissed.


	170. ==> BE CATERPILLAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Feferi: Vent about why petroleum + water is such a horrible combo

==> BE CATERPILLAR

It’s not uncommon for Perlen to come keep you company in your garbage chute hideaway for a while, but it’s a lot more unusual for him to be followed by Sulky Psychic Boy and Old Green Recon Mission Guy, all of them looking a little alarmed.

You furrow your brows at Perlen.

“CC,” he says.

You frown further. CC is a seadweller (CC is the seadwellerest of seadwellers), but she’s not scary to people who’d be scared of her.

Old Green Recon Mission Guy elaborates, “CC is upset about someone deliberately pouring petroleum in a seadweller ship’s water.“

“Very upset,” Sulky Psychic Boy clarifies further.

Ah. That makes sense. You nod, allowing the explanation, just as Why-Can’t-They-ALL-Be-Pale-Together (better nickname pending) dives in, wild-eyed.

“How long is this going to go ON?”


	171. ==> BE UNDERTOW

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: HIGHTIDE: Research quadrant corners; attempt to ward off revenge cycle.

==> BE UNDERTOW

Before taking off to talk to the psycholigarchists, Hightide waved vaguely at you and said “Check the rest of the quadrants and make sure this mess isn’t going to spawn a revenge cycle.” Asshole.

BUT, asshole commanding officer, so.

Neither Sessor not Sennet had a moirail, perhaps unsurprisingly, nor any kismesis besides each other, auspisticized though they were. They did both have matesprits – Sennet’s is teal, and posted in local landdweller security; Sessor’s is a subjugglator trainee on the Mirthful Maturation, which is unfortunate. Ugh. Well, SESSOR died because her rocket launcher (what the fuck) blew up on her. (Or at least that’s the only story that will be spread around.) Subjugglator matesprit doesn’t have anyone to take vengeance on, so that will be that. –Unless the auspistice is a target for failing. But that’s not really your problem. You shoot a heads-up off to Backwing, anyway – it’s only polite, and also you need to ask her whether the teal is likely to do anything suicidal involving Awwakk.


	172. ==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Briate: Find out your psychotic quadrants are coming to try and kill you.

==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

“WE’RE GOING TO BE TOGETHER,” Taggue messaged.

“we’re not going to need you anymore,” Cappul messaged.

“WE’RE GOING TO FIND OUT WHO’S REALLY THE BEST.”

“we’re going to see what’s left after it all.”

Oh no. No no no no no.

You wish you weren’t sitting in a flimsy little dormblock not allowed to properly defend yourself, because you know where this is going. It’s going where it was going LAST time, only last time you were on Alternia and not in the Fleet and there were no rules to keep you from knocking them both out with an electrified fence and tying them up until they calmed down and stopped trying to kill you.

Then you tell Backwing to maybe look into this, because when Taggue and Cappul REALLY get going it’s never just ONE person they’re interested in.


	173. ==> BE NEPETA [scheduling]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta: be encouraged to spend time with Eridan

==> BE NEPETA

“Do you suddenly have more free time?” Jorjel asks, puzzling over a palmhusk. “Or, wait, this isn’t marked as free time–”

It’s ~quadrant time~, and you have it too.

This is going to be awkward.


	174. ==> BE CIRRUS CAELUM

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Briate: Be a suddenly-very-appealing commodity on the pale market for anyone looking? Someone not Nepeta: Attempt to set Briate up with Eridan in pale

==> BE CIRRUS CAELUM

“What?” Briate says.

“Clearly, while you need some reassurance now, you’re more naturally suited to be the stabler one in a moirallegiance. Doesn’t mean it couldn’t still help you.”

“No one wants a purple–”

“Midblues aren’t known for stability, either, doesn’t mean I don’t know what I’m doing.”

“Well–”

“If you have something else in mind, that’s great, but if there isn’t anything else, I’ve got a list here of some halfway-decent seadweller trainees with open diamonds–”


	175. ==> BE EQUIUS [soothing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Past Nepeta: Be shooshpapped out of trying to kill Overbear on your own

==> BE EQUIUS

You were hoping to somehow keep Nepeta ignorant – both of Colonel Overbear‘s interest and of his… proclivities. But you know from the look on her face when she shows up at your block that it’s for nothing.

Neither of you comes out and says why you’re the one calming her down for once.


	176. ==> BE ERIDAN [unpacking finally]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: Consider flarping with nepeta on a fake date. She always wanted to flarp but didn't get to, and you enjoyed it, why not give it a try?

==> BE ERIDAN

When your lusus comes into the block, you’re digging frantically through boxes you haven’t touched since Conscription, tossing books and movies and goddamn WIZARD paraphernalia everywhere. He gives you a disapproving look.

“I’m trying to find my FLARP stuff,” you explain. “At least the manuals.”

Another disapproving look.

“I’m going to take Nepeta FLARPing,” you explain further. “As a… date thing. Since they’re going to expect us to do more now.”

The look becomes slightly more tolerant. Slightly.

You’re not sure whether your lusus understands your quadrant with Nepeta is supposed to be for show.


	177. ==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Briate: train in quadrant management

==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

After escaping from Cirrus’s matchmaking attempts, you put a little more though into what next. (Cirrus’s moirail is a very lucky – and very kinky – troll.)

You approach Backwing as she’s coming off her official security duties. “Could I do what you do?”

She does a bit of a double take. “Probably better than me, since you’re purple, but – why would you WANT to?”

You shrug. “I like to fix things and can’t handle another auspisticism just yet.”

“Well… I can try to show you the basics, anyway.”


	178. ==> BE GHOST!HESTEN BOETIA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Hesten: Use your new ghostly deadness to watch a FUNCTIONAL pair of matesprits be adorable and sigh at what you didn't get

==> BE GHOST!HESTEN BOETIA

It’s kind of awkward when you realize most of the ghosts in the group you seem to have joined were victims of the recently executed Colonel Overbear and therefore have quadrant experiences EVEN WORSE then yours. So you don’t really feel able to complain much, around them.

For some reason most of them still seem to be interested in speculating about other people’s quadrants. You don’t know how they still have the stomach for it.

You’re glad that if there are any active matesprit couples, in the so-called Inner Circle or anywhere else, they’re being DISCREET about it.


	179. ==> BE NEPETA [having in-law concerns]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan's lusus - have opinions about Nepeta

==> BE NEPETA

“Eridan’s lusus keeps STARING at me,” you finally blurt out to Jorjel. “Is that normal? Aurthour never did that. Or if he did he made it clear what he was thinking. I can’t tell if Eridan’s lusus disapproves of me, or…”

Jorjel shrugs. “I don’t know. My moirail’s lusus is pretty friendly. His matesprit’s lusus once tried to eat him.”

You sigh. “I’m going to have to ask Eridan, aren’t I.”


	180. ==> BE SOLLUX [reading]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: legislacerators: particularly depravved criminals: Rip the story of overbear from the headlines and have characters who are supposed to be some of the 12 main trolls

==> BE SOLLUX

You snag a copy of the draft script “Legislacerators: Particularly Depraved Criminals” sends to the top people on the ‘Ruthless Regulation’ so they can try to squash it and/or demand revisions. You’re expecting to see distorted versions of some members of the Terrifying Ghost Army, but in the end none of your friends officially had their names attached to Overbear’s, so no more than that.

But. Right there at the start of the script is a “prickly new legislacerator trainee” called Libere, who is talking (via videophone, of course) to an old friend on the ‘Total Domination of Inferiors’. The friend, a yellow named Amiety, is expressing his concern for his palecrush, Libere’s old rival, Jannah, who has entered a kismessissitude with a much older highblood about whom there are Dire Rumors. Libere, who is implied to have a palecrush on Amiety, fiercely promises to try to bring it to the attention of the proper authorities.

You laugh so hard Greasy jumps and spills hot instant grubnoodles down his pants.


	181. Q&A III

Q&A III

**Q: Awwak: think about that weird Eridan guy**

Mollym: Ampora is a prissy, pretentious ass with obnoxious glasses who spends more time and effort on clothes than should be LEGAL.  
Mollym: He’s less brain-dead than Bissel, not that THAT’S hard, less of a loser than Itchee, also not hard, and less generally pathetic than Kellep, again not hard… so of the new brats, possibly the least likely to get culled out of pure… lameness.

* * *

**Q: Nepeta and/or Karkat - a ship becomes canon**

Nepeta: I’m really quite fond of Vriskers c3< Cerull c3< Panthe!  
Karkat: What. No. No ships. No CANON, what the fuck.

* * *

**Q: Terrifying ghost army: roll eyes at/smack down theory about CC and CG involving the heiress and/or mutant blood that were culled at the last ascension.**

Aradia: They haven’t! Come up with it as a theory.  
Aradia: I think it’s mostly because except for Perlen – the brownblood from the Gleeful Abandon – they’re all from the Conscription round before us or earlier, and they were dead by the time we arrived.  
Aradia: (Or extremely preoccupied being… Overbear’d to death, in Hannah’s case. But she didn’t stick around after the trial.)  
Aradia: Not only did they not see the Challenge, I think hardly any of them knew there was an Heiress. A lot of them still don’t know, I’m pretty sure.  
Aradia: As for Karkat, that was weirdly well-publicized for the culling of a mutant, but still not something ghosts would tend to notice.  
Aradia: …Unless they were in the Surepain cult.  
Aradia: Which is… possible.

* * *

**Q: Any supervisor: have a shipping wall**

Backwing: It’s a ship wall, not a shipping wall, and believe me, it is COMPLETELY business.  
Takedown: Not as such, but Nineeyes and I have some bets going on.  
Nineeyes: I’ve bet on Nitram throttling Frieas.  
Hightide: I really do not want to know about the trainees’ romantic… misadventures.  
Bluemind[Corpsepap]: Huh?  
Sharpeye: …I may or may not have an encrypted spreadsheet called RELNSHPS.

* * *

**Q: Anyone: Avoid asking Equius how far Overbear got before getting killed**

Feferi: We know how far Overbear got before being killed, we were ghost stalking both of them nonstop for weeks before the trial, and Alesse – Scarf Girl – knew Overbear’s escalation pattern well enough to say he didn’t get any further before we got there than he got while we were there.  
Feferi: So there were whatever creepy “back massages” and other inappropriate touching he could get away with in public, before we blew up a light fixture or something to interrupt.  
Feferi: We made damn sure we never let him get Equius alone.  
Feferi: So that’s how far he got.  
Feferi: And, you know, terrorizing him and implying all sorts of threats and mind games and stuff.

* * *

**Q: I think skeleton is having too much fun**

Surepain[the one who knows Skeleton]: I’m not going to say you could say that at literally any time… but pretty close to it.

* * *

**Q: ghost karkat, since you've gotten so good at ghost punching, have you considered forming a ghost boxing league?**

Karkat: …  
Karkat: …  
Karkat: …  
Karkat: No.

* * *

**Q: Curious for those of you in 0kverse, how did you get picked for your professions and how was what ship you were sent to decided? (I'm not sure what the ratio of job you're trying for vs job the empire decides you're suite for is at play here)**

Sollux: I’ve probably had “helmsman” stamped on my file since I was five. Or earlier. I didn’t bother trying to do anything else.  
Aradia: Flaybone spotted me pretty early on during Conscription, and sent Drybleach to tag me. Necropath is a rare specialty, and overrides other possibilities – including helmsman, unless I’d been, like, Sollux-level strength.  
Terezi: It’s a combination. If you can pass the tests for your preferred destination, and if they don’t have too many, you go there – Tavros and I both did that. I had a written test and some physical performance tests.  
Tavros: No written for cavalreapers.  
Equius: I attempted to qualify for the archereradicators. I failed. I was then put in with the unsorted blueblood conscripts to be assessed once in space. They placed me in medical engineering shortly after that.  
Vriska: I was unsorted, too, until they put me on the recon thing.  
Gamzee: Any, uh, any purple who wants to can go to subjugglator training, they just… after that…  
Eridan: All seadweller conscripts go into further education.

* * *

**Q: 0k Tavros, do any of the other lowbloods resent you for having fancy robo-legs? Any who may have known someone culled for a missing limb or anything?**

Giselt: Have I ever. Maybe like, five of them, over the sweeps.  
Giselt: Three of them due to that FUCKING crocodile. Chomp chomp, cull.  
Giselt: But Nitram is a hard guy to resent.

* * *

**Q: Eridan and Nepeta: have the most awkward, ghost supervised "date"**

Nepeta: There will be no ghost supurrvising.  
Nepeta: Or if there is, I had better not hear about it.

* * *

**Q: I'm a bit confused on the layout of eridans ship. How much is water vs air? How do non sea dwellers move around?**

Eridan: All the important parts are air.  
Eridan: For so many reasons.  
Eridan: Water is recreational and residential.  
Eridan: Well, you get part water and part air for your personal quarters.  
Eridan: Too much space wasted on water, if you ask ME.  
Relrin: SEADWELLERS ARE SUPPOSED TO BE IN WATER!!!!

* * *

**Q: 0k Her Imperious Condescension: Think about who could have bred a mutant red lusus that raised the latest mutant red freak**

Altadona of the Brooding Caverns: They wanted to send us auditors. Needless to say I couldn’t allow that. Subjugglators anywhere in the caverns would be an unacceptable amount of stress on the Mother Grub.  
Altadona of the Brooding Caverns: Then they wanted to put out a bounty on mutant-blooded lusii, and seemed surprised when I pointed out that would no doubt lead to the slaughter of innumerable normal lusii.  
Altadona of the Brooding Caverns: Finally we just agreed on new training materials for jadebloods dealing with lusii emphasizing the importance of immediately destroying mutant lusii.  
Altadona of the Brooding Caverns: All of this was subjugglators. I don’t know what Her Imperious Condescension’s feelings about everything were.  
Altadona of the Brooding Caverns: (My predecessor told me in confidence that the Empress prefers not to deal personally with the Brooding Caverns because as an institution they are older than she is, and the Empress is not comfortable with that.)

* * *

**Q: Eridan: Be classy and interrogate ghost friends as to what quadrant activities they can actually do**

Eridan: I am NOT goin to ask Fef if ghosts can have sex.  
Eridan: I’m just not.  
Eridan: OR Kar. I’m not askin anyone if ghosts can have sex.  
Eridan: What is wrong with you.

Vriska: …I might ask someone if ghosts can have sex.

* * *

**Q: BONEBELT: How do you decide whom to dispel and whom to allow to stay?**

Bonebelt: Some things we have policies on. Dead necropaths and helmsman we don’t dispel unless they’re causing major problems and refusing to work with us.  
Bonebelt: Otherwise it’s a case-by-case basis. We have to be seen to be doing our jobs, obviously, so a problem we are engaged to make go away has to go away one way or another.  
Bonebelt: Sometimes we can advise a ghost to step off or get dispelled; sometimes we bring them home.  
Bonebelt: …There’s a lot of personal preference involved.

* * *

**Q: Question for overbear: Why aim so young? Is it because they're easier to manipulate or do the bodies of pre-adults appeal more to you?**

Alesse: He can’t answer you, he’s extra-super dead.  
Alesse: HA!  
Alesse: …I think it was a combination. He liked YOUNG adults – I was not a pre-adult, thanks – physically.  
Alesse: He also liked that new conscripts are more vulnerable. Not just because they’re easier to manipulate, but they’re also less experienced in fighting and less able to defend themselves, and just not as strong – if I’d reached full strength, he never could have STRANGLED me. And new conscripts are much less likely to have powerful connections who are persistent with the inconvenient questions when they turn up dead, or even interfere earlier.  
Alesse: He certainly fucked that up.  
Alesse: HA!

* * *

**Q: frieas, describe your taste in a pitch quadrantmate please? Also, how much does it hurt getting kneed by a pair of robolegs?**

Frieas: Lowblood, first of all. Well, MAYBE an olive, but anything higher than that I just couldn’t take their black feelings seriously. Bluebloods and higher get infuriated and lash out over any little thing – how could you know it’s really about you?  
Frieas: And sweet – shit, sweet people PISS ME OFF. The universe is NOT LIKE THAT.  
Frieas: But tough. Which is why Tiblee doesn’t do it for me, even though he’s not as jaded as most people – he’s a beautiful little rolled baked sweetened dough product, but he’s too mushy. A proper kismesis needs to stand up to you – needs to have something worth ADMIRING, not just liking.  
Frieas: And nothing annoys me quite like getting all CHUMMY with highbloods. Use them, sure, but don’t CARE about them.   
Frieas: Amiety was something else. I never said a thing she didn’t have a cutting rejoinder for.  
Frieas: I hate that she got killed because of that damn blueblood matesprit.  
Frieas: She’d threaten to string me up by my intestines whenever I’d offer to pile the dolt.

* * *

**Q: Helmsmen: Flarp**

Ananas: Oh my god that would be hilarious.  
Ananas: ‘Okay, I’m a’ – oh, I don’t know – ‘I’m a legislacerator, and Gathering Swarm is a criminal, and I’m going to tackle him!”  
Ananas: ‘Just hang on, Captain Tideburn, we’ll be done in a few hours – have everyone strap in ‘til then!’  
Ananas: Which is to say, the ‘live action’ part would cause some SERIOUS practical difficulties!

* * *

**Q: Hey sollux, you said you doubted you could walk away if they unhooked you like they claimed, but what if you got some cool robo pieces like tavros? Could you do it then as an awesome cyborg?**

Sollux: I meant I don’t think I could just – immediately walk away.  
Sollux: I didn’t get anything hacked off.  
Sollux: Unhook me and give me eight weeks of recuperation and physical therapy and I really could walk away, no robotic pieces necessary.

* * *

**Q: Frieas: cease being a pitch two wheel device**

Takedown: He’s not a pitch two-wheel device. He’s just obnoxious.  
Takedown: If he does pitch-hookup with Nitram it might direct some of his obnoxiousness in a more socially acceptable direction. He wasn’t quite as bad before Ammete got culled.  
Nineeyes: I’m still hoping Nitram’s going to throttle him.

* * *

**Q: Sollux: How's the power draw situation? Any way they could get you moved to a classier ship that won't overdraw you?**

Sollux: Still manageable.  
Sollux: I don’t want to get moved to another ship.  
Sollux: This place is obnoxious, but they’re… lax.  
Sollux: I can get away with pretty much anything.  
Sollux: That’s worth an little extra power draw.

* * *

**Q: Kanaya, have you had to have any direct interaction with grubs? Do the jades use the ones they cull to make awesome hats or grubsauce or what?**

Kanaya: None whatsoever.  
Perses: Yeah, that’s for IMPERFECT jades. Especially on the ~higher~ end of imperfect jades. We get to cull unacceptable grubs, it’s ~such~ an honor.  
Perses: Yay.  
Perses: And YES I KNOW the attrition is natural and necessary and we are merely facilitating and directing the way things have to be, SHUT UP MALTHA.  
Perses: At our age we’re expected to conduct ourselves with sober professionalism in respect for our holy responsibility.  
Perses: Some of the older ones, NOT SO MUCH.  
Perses: …Hats?  
Surewait: As much as I’d like to say that’s a ridiculous idea…


	182. ==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Awwakk: Find out how Hesten really felt and react to it.

==> BE MOLLYM AWWAKK

The psycholigarchist asked you how you felt that your matesprit would rather die than stay with you. It’s like everyone’s taking it for granted that Hesten died on purpose instead of being murdered by Sessor and Sennet. And OBVIOUSLY he was murdered by Sessor and Sennet.

And you didn’t let them get away with it – like he said in his last message. Whatever THAT was about.

You just don’t understand. How could he not see he was the most important thing to you? You never would have held on so hard if you didn’t care about him at all.

You knew he wasn’t really… ecstatic about things, but you were giving him time to get over it! Would you have done that if you didn’t really care about him? You were building a motorized two-wheel device for him! With mounting hooks for his favorite weapons!

You just…

You don’t…

You don’t understand how things went wrong.


	183. ==> BE BONEBELT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Cappul and Taggue: So, how does it feel, being dead? Any plans?

==> BE BONEBELT

“This is just a precaution,” the head of landdweller security says. He sounds tired. “Nothing’s come up yet, but from what we do know about the decedents…”

You nod. “I understand, sir.”

The wispy seadweller ghost lingering by the scorched bulkheads frowns at you when you approach. “You’re a lowblood. What are you doing here? I’ll kill you.” Her gaze slips away quickly – she hasn’t really FOUND herself, as a ghost. “Where’s Cappul?” And a little more solid just with that, and it will get much worse if (probably when) she finds her murderkismesis and they reinforce each other – yeah, dealing with these two NOW is definitely the smart choice.

“There is a ghost here, sir,” you tell the purple. “It meets Taggue Sessor’s description. Should I dispel it?”

“Fuck yes.”

You don’t need anything dramatic, not with a ghost this new, but you still close your eyes, hold out your hands, and hum under your breath. Never short the theatrics, when you’re in front of a purple.


	184. ==> BE AURICH FRIEAS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Frieas: Taunt tavros by offering to pacify his teal-oh shit she's right behind you

==> BE AURICH FRIEAS

“Sooo,” you say, smirking at Nitram. “You got that teal registered, but have you closed the deal yet? They are just so FLIGHTY, you sure you’re up to it?“

“Uh…” Nitram says.

Something smacks down on your head. “MR. Frieas!”

Shit.

She leans forward to talk RIGHT in your ear. “FOR your future reference, I do NOT appreciate being used as a prop in anyone’s pitchflirting.”

Shiiiit.

“IF Tavros finds you a suitable pitch prospect, I expect you to be a little more prudent in your taunting. If not–” You can see her toothy grin out of the corner of your eye. “I may be forced to explore the limits of my attention span as a flighty teal in showing you your errors!”

And she’s away down the hall, twirling a cane around her hand.

You scowl. “Nothing blind should be that quiet.”

Nineeyes smacks you on the back of the head. “You are fucking lucky that wasn’t some other teal, Frieas. Get a survival instinct.”


	185. ==> BE SOLLUX [pissed off]

Sollux: Get in a fight

==> BE SOLLUX

You don’t send Ruthless Regulation an exploding virus. It would be considered sabotage and you could get in all sorts of trouble.

You do send Ruthless Regulation a virus that changes all mentions of the ship’s name in the engineering logs to “Ruthie”, and then erases itself.

You don’t care how annoying the ghosts were, transferring Greasy and Bucket Face to your helmsblock was NOT OKAY.


	186. ==> BE VRISKA [seeking information]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska: Try to ask if ghosts can have sex without coming right out and asking if ghosts can have sex

==> BE VRISKA

“So, Camieo… have you done a lot of ashen stuff since you were a ghost?”

They shrug. “Not as much as when I was alive, but I was pretty functional even before this whole… gathering started – a lot better off than some people.”

“So, like… if the ghosts DON’T get auspisticized… what do they DO?”

“They… don’t chill out?”

“But I mean… what do they DO?”

Camieo blinks, and then starts laughing.


	187. ==> BE KANAYA [pausing in brooding]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: Be Released from Seclusion

==> BE KANAYA

They finally give you a day off.

Vigilant catches your arm as you’re leaving. “While I’ve never been in your exact position, I have done prolonged duty in the Innermost Cavern. My advice for spending your time is to go outside in the sun and shout at things for a while.”


	188. ==> BE NEPETA [FLARPing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Nepeta: Enjoy your first flarp

==> BE NEPETA

FLARPing is actually kind of annoying, in some ways. There are a lot of strict rules and structure you’re not used to from your impromptu RP, and all this equipment to monitor and enforce it. You have to roll (virtual) dice to tell whether you persuade someone, instead of just… trying to persuade them? Weird.

But! You’ve always wanted to do it, and now you have. And there are some good points, too – you DEMOLISHED those constructs, which was a lot of satisfying than saying “ac hunts the thing”. So it was a pretty good outing, all in all.


	189. ==> BE SOMEONE FEELING FRISKY

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Someone: Get frisky

==> BE SOMEONE FEELING FRISKY

You are now a giant crocodile lusus.

You’re bored.

Mmmm, that looks tasty.


	190. ==> BE EQUIUS [looking forward]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius: E%cel at your enginihilator training

==> BE EQUIUS

They’ve started giving you above-novice work, you’ve noticed. You haven’t been having any trouble keeping up with it.

At this rate people may even start thinking of you as someone other than That Guy Overbear Almost Got.


	191. ==> BE TEREZI [before Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k Terezi, were you allowed to bring your egg lusus up into space with you?

==> BE TEREZI

It’s a little risky to take a nap on the forest floor, and also kind of unnecessary since your lusus can reach you in your hive, but you do it anyway.

“So, about Conscription,” you say in your dream, as soon as you feel her presence. “You fit in the size restrictions for teal NOW, and the rules about lusii which grow are a little unclear. But… to hatch on a ship… to never come back here… I don’t know if…”

You’re not exactly happy about it yourself, and you’ve had over eight sweeps to roam free.

“And I don’t know if it would be safe for you, with a lot of trolls in a small space and no doomsday device,” you add ruefully. “You can fend off animals easily enough, but if there are purples around… I’m not sure if I could protect you.”

A feeling of trust, then concern and an image of the doomsday device detonating as you try to shift the egg.

“Give me some credit, I’d get Mr. Appleberry to do it. From a safe distance.” Which might be several kilometers, from the look of it. “But… if you’ll be okay here…”

Her dream-embrace is as warm as it always is.

You wish so much you could have felt her for real, just once.


	192. ==> BE SENIOR HELMSTECH TURNOVER

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sollux's technician: Question your helmsman's seemingly eclectic tastes when it comes to semi-illegally downloading movies to watch.

==> BE SENIOR HELMSTECH TURNOVER

“Is this normal?” the kid asks. You can’t remember their name – just not Arthro or Essevi.

“The media downloads? Yes, just let that pass. It keeps them happier.”

“Well, yeah, I know that, but… the selection… Doesn’t it seem a little weird to you? Pupa Pan, Legislacerators, sappy romances, nature documentaries – there’s some of everything?”

“So he has eclectic tastes. It’s not that strange.”

“I wonder if it has to do with the necropath girlfriend. I can’t ask about it if it is to do with her. Necropaths are scary.”


	193. ==> BE ERIDAN [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: could you do eridan's pov on karkat's mutation?

==> BE ERIDAN

You’re in shock.

Kar’s dead.

Kar is also an illegal mutant so illegal it’s illegal to know how illegal it is, which is an unpleasant surprise. Are you on the record anywhere as being associated with him? Is Fef? You don’t think so.

…Kar was always kind of cagey about being on the record associated with anyone.

Fuck, he must have been getting ready for just this moment. He was PROTECTING you?

What good is it being aristocracy if you can’t keep the people you want to keep?

(It’s not that you think mutantbloods shouldn’t be culled. You’re not an iconoclast like Fef wants to be. You just think Kar should be an exception, that’s all.)


	194. ==> BE SUBJUGGLATOR NOVICEMASTER TRUCOLOR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k verse whoever is in charge d who gets set where: why send gamzee straight to that ship instead of letting him train first? He's the old grad high bloods descendant

==> BE SUBJUGGLATOR NOVICEMASTER TRUCOLOR

Supposedly, Capricorn is an extremely auspicious sign for a subjugglator. But this kid culled one stinking lowblood and had a motherfucking mental breakdown. Yeah, you’re not wasting any more valuable time training him. Gleeful Abandon it is.

(The mythical Ideal Highblood would just rise to the occasion of the Gleeful Abandon, anyway.)


	195. ==> BE TAVROS [with horns]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: Have horn related mishaps

==> BE TAVROS

Stuff in the Fleet is sized to accommodate older trolls with terrifyingly impressive horns, so you haven’t been having the problems you had back on Alternia. Yet.

“Plan on going through a lot of doors and access corridors sideways, kid,” Nineeyes said. “They’ll offer you surgery, but don’t take it. It fucks up your balance and spatial awareness, and you need those in this job.”


	196. ==> BE VRISKA [on the Magnificent Marine Predation]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska: Sabotage some Douchebag

==> BE VRISKA

The seadwellers are trying to get their ship under control, Karkat is talking to the blueblood suicide attack ghost, Nepeta is explaining things to her blockmate, Eridan is networking or something, and Feferi is wrangling other bits of the terrifying ghost army. You have nothing to do.

Exceeeeeeeept…

You identify Awwakk’s (empty, since she’s being detained) personal block by the sign on the door. You poke around a bit, and eventually settle on setting her computer on fire. Then you leave in a hurry and hope you don’t get in trouble.

(You’re supposed to clear any sabotage on the Enthusiastic Violence with Aradia, and on the Unrelenting Persecution with Sollux – no one said anything about the Magnificent Marine Predation!)

(Awwakk blames it on one of the numerous seadwellers pissed about the petroleum-on-fire incident.)


	197. ==> BE VRISKA [GARPing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska: Ghost FLARP. FGARP?

==> BE VRISKA

Dressing up for GARPing is actually kind of hard. What you look like as a ghost is mostly mental but not always conscious. Sometimes when ghosts stop paying attention they revert back to what they looked like when they died.

(Which looked REALLY bad on Gilyan, just saying.)

You hardly ever look like you were crushed by a door, which is great. You do tend to flicker back and forth between your uniform and your pre-Conscription clothes pretty randomly, which is a little annoying. You’re sometimes getting your flesh arm and missing eye back, which is… weird.

And you cannot seem to maintain your Spinneret Mindfang costume and do anything else at all at the same time! Spend an hour putting the costume together, say hi to Camieo, and oops! Back in uniform.

You guess maybe space just isn’t Mindfang’s natural habitat.


	198. Q&A IV

**Q: Jades: Make hats out of dead grubs, have a fashion show and compare your ultra-stylish works of art**

Ancillar Surewait: THAT, I’m pretty sure is not a thing.

* * *

**Q: Tavros' coworkers: Wonder out loud if Tavros can feel anything on his robo bits. Devise a way to test.**

[Psst: Relevant to this, it was mentioned in a Q&A that unlike Equius’s first design for robolegs, the design that was implemented involved amputation at mid-thigh.]

Nineeyes: No need to speculate. It looks like it’s up-to-standards robotic limb replacement, which means it definitely feels pressure, and maybe extreme temperatures.  
Nineeyes: Meaning you can’t tickle him, but he CAN tell if you touch the legs.  
Nineeyes: No one should need to be kicked in the face to figure that out.

* * *

**Q: Just curious, did the 0k kids already face drone season and survive or is it still a sweep or two away for them?**

Aradia: Drone season is immediately before Conscription, but funny story about that!  
Aradia: So you know how they tell you YOU MUST CONTRIBUTE EACH PAIL OR DIE?  
Aradia: Well, that’s not quite true!  
Aradia: The drones come to each hive where records tell them a contribution-age troll lives and demand pails, and if they don’t get at least one red and at least one black, they cull the legal resident.  
Aradia: But if you’re not in your hive, they visit one more time, but they don’t go looking for you. Things are chaotic, lots of people die around that time, it would be a waste of effort.  
Aradia: And they aren’t supposed to kill anyone who’s not a resident of the hive, though I wouldn’t bank on that one.  
Aradia: And they don’t check that the buckets are actually, you know, yours.  
Aradia: Not that most people know any of this, or else Vriska would have skipped the BucketList thing.  
Aradia: Anyway, between the twelve of us crashing at Karkat’s, Vriska’s BucketList hookups, Eridan trying to seduce Karkat’s neighbors, and that unfortunate but hilarious mixup identifying the hive as a good hookup location, it wasn’t too hard for the hive to produce more than enough pails to satisfy the drones.  
Aradia: But I’m not going to give you any more details.  
Aradia: 0u0

* * *

**Q: Dear 0k aradia: Any thoughts on turning the terrifying ghost army into a terrifying robot army? I bet Equius could build bodies for karkat fef and gamzee at least**

Aradia: Uh… what?  
Aradia: Why would…  
Aradia: How…  
Aradia: I can maybe see how a necropath could inhabit a robot?  
Aradia: I don’t think it would work for other people.

[Soulbots aren’t a thing in this universe! Equius did build an Aradiabot a while back for dubious purposes, creeping out everyone, everywhere, but he later destroyed it.]

* * *

**Q: Kellep: Is FLARPing romantic?**

Mustel: I’m sure it COULD be done romantically!  
Mustel: It’s not really my thing.  
Mustel: Jorjel isn’t into it, either, and Cannis actively dislikes the idea.  
Mustel: She’s said it sounds like a framework to kill people and pretend someone else did it, and that’s extremely distasteful to her.  
Mustel: You’d have to ask her moirail for the details.  
Mustel: …Jorjel and I did once try some informal pale-romantic roleplay, but we both kept giggling.

* * *

**Q: ok kids: What kind of accomidations does everyone have? How cushy vs how utilitarian is your room? Who has to have blockmates vs who doesn't? And does the answer only have to do with blood or is it also what job you're training for?**

Aradia: I don’t have a blockmate, which was shocking to me. Necropaths have it GOOD for lowbloods. It’s a really small block, but all mine! …and my ghost entourage, which may be related. I’ll get my own respiteblock and officeblock when I get my permanent posting!  
Tavros: Five to a bunkblock, amenities shared with four other bunkblocks. It’s, um, a pain.  
Sollux: …  
Nepeta: It looks like there’s supposed to be four people here, but there’s only two. There’s a bit more than just the bunks – desks, storage, that sort of thing.  
Kanaya: I would have blockmates if I weren’t in the “perfect” category, but I got a small block to myself immediately. …Of course now I’m camped out with the Matriorb.  
Terezi: Two to a block with an attached half-hygieneblock, and it isn’t bad! There’s room to study, stash your things, move around a bit, and so on. There was MORE room to move around before the giant gold dog sculpture arrived…  
Equius: I have my own block, hygieneblock, and kitchenette.  
Eridan: I have a suite.

* * *

**Q: Overbear: How did a highblood of your age not have enough powerful allies to keep from getting taken down by the legislacerators? Also, will you have any friends or allies looking for revenge?**

Alesse: Still can’t answer you, STILL EXTRA DEAD.  
Alesse: No one wants revenge. He did have allies, which is a lot of why no one stopped him before this, but I think not really friends – he generally didn’t get close to people he didn’t feel he could control.  
Alesse: Bastard.  
Alesse: Some of those allies COULD probably have jumped in to save him from the legislacerators, but that would have meant publicly supporting someone now KNOWN to have fucked and murdered dozens of young highbloods for his own amusement.  
Alesse: They cut him loose pretty quick.  
Alesse: …If he’d been a subjugglator, the other subjugglators might have stood by him, they’re fucked up like that, but he wasn’t.

* * *

**Q: Hey trolls! What's the food like? Does it get shipped in from other planets or are there a couple of agricultural ships in the fleet? Do you all just eat paste or freeze dried stuff. Is it made artificially in a lab?**

Equius: I have no complaints.  
Terezi: It’s… okay I guess? Mostly canned, frozen, boxed, dry, nothing fresh, but there’s variety.  
Eridan: It’s okay. The cafeteria hours aren’t flexible enough.  
Sollux: I don’t want to talk about it.  
Tavros: You’d think maintenance people would get worse rations, than cavalreapers, but it’s actually better? It probably has to do with knowing the supply people. I guess it’s okay.  
Nepeta: It’s AWFUL. I haven’t had any fresh meat at all except what Equius gave me, and it was all cooked!  
Aradia: It varies a lot! Most of it is from planets, freeze-dried or otherwise preserved, but there is a very small amount of fresh food produced in the squadron. It is pretty much exclusively for highbloods and people they choose to share it with.  
Aradia: Aaaaaaaand people extorting highbloods to get rid of terrible terrible ghost problems.

* * *

**Q: Equius: You're freakishly strong, right? Why not just go along with Overbear and then strangle him during? You could have ended it without your friends having to risk their necks.**

Nepeta: HISSSSSSS!  
Nepeta: One, Overbear was a FULLY-GROWN PURPLEBLOOD. An active-duty ruffiannihilator. Equius is really strong, probably stronger than everyone else our age, but he’s not strong enough to make that match a sure thing!  
Nepeta: Two, if he’d successfully killed Overbear, he would have been up for murder and possibly mutiny – enforcement is inconsistent when the victim is higher-ranked but not in the same chain of command – and they don’t care if the outranking-you highblood was probably planning to kill you, they usually don’t care if they were actively trying to kill you – it would have been really bad! Equius would have been killed for sure, and if they’d said mutiny they might have investigated further and the rest of us might have gotten in trouble anyway.  
Nepeta: Three, how DARE you say it’s Equius’s responsibility to overcome a lifetime of conditioning to plot against the FULLY GROWN PURPLEBLOOD SUPERIOR OFFICER.  
Nepeta: Insubordination doesn’t come naturally to everyone!  
Nepeta: He resisted passively as much as he could and I AM FURRY PURROUD OF HIM!

* * *

**Q: To Tavros: The food may be worse, bu was the rooming situation better for cavalreapers?**

Tavros: There was, uh, more space in the bunkblocks,  
Tavros: There were also, more bloodcaked weapons in the bunkblocks,  
Tavros: It was “their aesthetic”.


	199. ==> BE NEPETA [thinking back]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k Nepeta: Reminisce on how you got into all this.

==> BE NEPETA

You shrug. “I guess really if you go all the way back it’s because of my meowrail, and his neighbor who was really – um – socially active.”

“The neighbor introduced you?” Jorjel asked.

“No no no!” You shake your head vigorously. “I’m not sure I would have trusted introductions from Vriskers. Terezi was her friend, and I met Terezi while she was visiting Vriskers and I was visiting Equius, and then Terezi put me in touch with some other people beclaws she lived somewhere really remote, too, and knew what that was like. She knew Aradia – our necropath friend – from FLARPing. So… yeah. Oh, and Vriskers knew Eridan, too.”

You don’t mention Karkat or Feferi, or even Gamzee. You may mention Tavros or Sollux or Kanaya eventually. Not yet, though.

“So it all comes back to Pounce ranging particularly fur afield and trying to bite Aurthour, really!”

Jorjel nods. “I know how THAT goes. My lusus actually knocked Mustel out cold the first time we met – she’s a ballistic armadillo-mole, and we were just… um… cutting loose a bit.” She frowns. “I know his matesprit’s lusus tried to eat him, but I don’t remember if that was if they first met.”


	200. ==> BE TEREZI [running out of patience]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Tavros: Pap the girl

==> BE TEREZI

Tavros leans against the diamondblock door as soon as it closes. “Terezi. Please convince me that it would be, um, a very wrong thing to do to get the medicullers to do something horrible to Frieas at his next checkup just to GET BACK AT HIM FOR NEVER STOPPING OFFERING INTIMATE SUGGESTIONS ABOUT WHAT I SHOULD DO IN MY DIAMOND!”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This one is short, but it DESERVES to be #200 because of the NUMBER OF TIMES I GOT THE PROMPT.


	201. ==> BE ARADIA [at work]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k Aradia - dispel a ghost.

==> BE ARADIA

As a kid, you were more into stirring ghosts up than anything else, but in hindsight, you dispelled your first ghost when you were three and a half. He started following you after you explored the ruins of his old hive, and while he’d go away when you told him to he wouldn’t STAY away, until finally you’d had enough. You reached out, like with your psionics but not, and GRABBED and TWISTED and CRUSHED and blew what was left away like powder, and the ghost never came back.

Now that you know what you’re doing, dispelling doesn’t have to be so… inherently violent, but you think it’s still worth remembering: dispelling isn’t NICE. Necessary, often, but not nice.

You walk calmly past the cowering locals to the problem hygieneblock, easily identifiable from all the crashing noises. The ghost stands in the middle, ranting about never getting enough respect. When he sees you, he throws a load gaper at your head. Psionics take care of THAT with no trouble.

You hold out a hand and reach out with your mind, grasp, CLENCH–

–Scatter.


	202. ==> BE ERIDAN [getting excited]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: ok Eridan: Get really excited about something historical.

==> BE ERIDAN

“You know who your Ancestor is and you NEVER TOLD ME?”

Mustel blinks at you. “I didn’t know you’d be interested?”

“I’m always interested in Ancestors!” Even Vris’s clusterfuck!

“He was mostly know for publishing sea charts. Not… all that exciting, by most standards? I mean, he did good work, and I’m proud to be his descendant, but most people–”

“I don’t care, tell me everything!”


	203. ==> BE PAST CANNIS SKAREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Skaree: reminisce about that one time your lusus tried to eat your matesprit?

==> BE PAST CANNIS SKAREE

You are so close to catching the antlerbeast. It can run fast, but not as fast as your mom can fly, and the river will slow it down enough to catch it before it makes it into the trees where you’ll have trouble following–

Your mom abruptly changes course, heading down the river instead of after the antlerbeast, and you nearly slide off her neck. “Mom, no!” you say. “It’s getting away–”

Oh, shit, there’s a troll in the river.

“Mom, no! We’re hunting antlerbeasts today! ANTLERBEASTS!” She tries to grab him, but he vanishes under the water. “NOT TROLLS!” You scramble forward to haul on the fur of her ear. “Leave it!”

Mom sulks.

Later you have to walk the troll back to the beach because seadwellers breathing freshwater is apparently a recipe for being VERY shaky on your feet. You’re baffled when he wants to exchange contact info after a meeting like that, but what the hell.


	204. ==> BE SCAVENGE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Scavenge and Vriska: Be in cahoots. Cahooooooooooots.

==> BE SCAVENGE

Megido gives you a narrow look. “Go over it again ANYWAY.”

You sigh. “Nothing that will kill anyone or logically lead to someone getting killed. Nothing on the Unrelenting Persecution or Ruthless Regulation. No requests which will be immediately kicked down the ladder. If she wants to back out don’t coerce her. Are you happy now?”

Megido turns to the ghost practically vibrating with excitement next to her. “Have at it.”

“Yessss!” the ghost says, and bounces forward, tossing her hair. “You won’t regret it, Aradia, I promise!”

You have a highblood to shake down.


	205. ==> BE GAMZEE [audiencing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0K GAmzee: So how are those ballads going?

==> BE GAMZEE

“Neeeeever see the shooooooreline agaaaaaain…”

Chidro strums a few more minor chords, and bows. There is scattered applause from some of the Terrifying Ghost Army present, plus a dead necropath and Graywire.

“How was that?” Chidro asks eagerly. “Good, right?”

“Miraculous, bro,” you assure him. “Just… maybe don’t play it for CG.”


	206. ==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Skaree: Screw subtlety, you're panicking.

==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

You are not panicking. Not yet. Not quite.

The simulators are making Turtur MISERABLE, and her scores are falling accordingly, but she can still do what she has to do. The real crisis point is actual live targets. And those are coming up, but not immediately – you’ve got five weeks to find a solution. Which you WILL.


	207. ==> BE KANAYA [recuperating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: Be the rainbowdrinker. Avoid bad romance tropes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> IMPORTANT! Here begin spoilers for Send Mail (10) / receiive maiil (4) in the main fic.

==> BE KANAYA

You are unaware of any rainbow drinker romances where the rainbow drinker is stuck on a medical pallet with two badly broken femurs, so you think you are probably safe in that area. Evidently rainbow drinkers have vastly accelerated healing of soft tissue, but not so much bones. The bones will heal faster than they would otherwise, but it will still be a while.

So far you don’t think you’ve hit a single romance trope, actually. You’re not sure you’ve hit any tropes from any genre. You haven’t even bitten anyone. They’ve been giving you fluid bags of blood – mostly jade, but a few servings of some other colors which must have come from grubs. (Which is a little disturbing.) You also must look like a terrible mess, even after having a chance to clean up a little. (Your personal respiteblock is currently inaccessible and possibly destroyed, so the toiletries were all donated or loaned by well-wishers. Or in the case of the lipstick, stolen by well-wishers from someone named Maltha who ‘deserves it’.)

Your stomach still aches when you let too long pass between painkiller doses.

This is really not romantic at all.

But at least you’re alive. You think this counts as alive? Close enough.


	208. ==> BE SOLLUX [unpleasantly surprised]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sollux: Wake up to "2he2 not a2 okay a2 2he2 2ayiing 2he iis" in your inbox.

==> BE SOLLUX

Helmsmen aren’t scheduled to sleep as often or as long as is normal for trolls, but sleep cycle is imposed through the system in such a way as you have to FIGHT to stay awake during it. You usually don’t. (Unless you’re having an up day.) The system does wake you up relatively quickly and painlessly (for waking up, for you).

All systems you have access to within normal parameters. Dropbox hasn’t leaped in size while you were away, so probably there hasn’t been another emergency. It looks like Enthusiastic Violence has more malware. Message bundle – a couple message bundles – one’s actually from Kanaya–

A minute later, you want to kick disorderlyImpulse for her shittiness at being reassuring. Then you appreciate disorderlyImpulse’s shitty reassurance compared to Kanaya’s terrible downplaying.

The second message makes things slightly clearer and you very slightly less worried. But only slightly.

You are NOT going to suffer this alone.


	209. ==> BE KANAYA [maybe being haunted]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: Be haunted? Maybe?

==> BE KANAYA

It starts as just a feeling of being watched, and you assume someone’s sneaking by to look at the Matriorb. As long as they don’t disrupt anything, you don’t mind. When it keeps happening, you ask Vigilant about security – she seems to think nobody should be able to get in. Maybe the quiet is making you imagine things.

As time goes by, you’re more and more lonely and sick of being STUCK down here, so it’s not really surprising your sense of being watched gets more negative, too. It feels like you’re being judged and found wanting. But you do feel better after you get outside for a bit.

Then you start glimpsing shapes out of the corner of your eye when no one should be there. Nothing very distinct, but troll-shaped. Sometimes there are eyes.

As your unease climbs again it seems to become contagious. Kebela gets twitchy and hurries away at the end of her shift, muttering about seeing her moirail. The chanters keep losing their place. Vigilant frowns around the chamber and says it doesn’t feel right anymore – she’ll see the Altadona about where you might be able to move.

Less than twelve hours later the Inner Caverns suffers the largest cave-in on record, and you throw yourself between the Matriorb and a falling stalactite.

There weren’t any stalactites in the chamber.


	210. ==> BE PERSES RESHKI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: disorderlyImpulse: Freak out. But in, like, an informative way?

==> BE PERSES RESHKI

You don’t freak out at first, because you don’t know what’s happening. It’s just a really loud rumble, and the grub holding chamber shakes some. The junior ancillar who was trying to juggle grubs stops immediately like she thought she caused it somehow. Maltha assumes Ashtar did it. Your guess would be a problem with the slurry-transport equipment. It’s happened before.

There’s another rumble. A few more. The lights flicker.

At this point you pull out your mobile to see if any kind of maintenance notice has been sent out. Central Info is down. The network isn’t – you can reach your husktop, or a couple other people’s husktops, or the auxiliary novitiate server – but the central computer isn’t showing up.

That’s never happened before. Sure, sometimes it’s made no sense, but it’s always shown up.

You wonder if the noise was actually a problem with the computer? You’ve never seen the termite mainframe yourself, but it has to be huge… You text Kebela to see if she knows what’s going on, but she’s offline.

And there’s still no alert, so you just get back to herding grubs until an older Ancillar shows up and tells you all to get your asses the the pupation chambers and start moving COCOONS. There’s been a cave-in, she says – in the Inner Caverns, MASSIVE, they’re not sure what else might be destabilized, we have to move quickly to protect grubs and cocoons and maybe even eggs–

Kebela is still offline.


	211. ==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Skaree's moirail: have painful emotions

==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

You don’t know whether the artillerannihilation training sims are designed to catch people like you or just turned out that way. Your fellow trainees seem to find blasting screaming virtual aliens as they try to flee to be hilarious, great fun, compare highlights over dinner, aliens are so lame. You just keep spending your off time looking up the attributions to find out what real alien worlds the sims are based on, even though your simulator time is a constant internal mantra of ‘it’s not real, it’s not real, it’s not real’. It was real for somebody.

Someday it will be real for you.


	212. ==> BE PERSES RESHKI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Perses: React to news about super-secret Perfect Jade project.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Follows 2end maiil (13)

==> BE PERSES RESHKI

You are such an awful jade you have to look up what a Matriorb is.

Keeping in mind twinArmageddons’s warning about being discreet, you do it on the grubnet – the pre-adults’ internet adult jadebloods are theoretically not supposed to access, but fuck that. It takes some searching. It’s listed as a legend: the mystic egg from which a True Mother Grub hatches.

You do NOT spit soda on your computer. Instead, you stare at it for a while. Then you erase your search history and disconnect from the grubnet, and go looking for your moirail. Under ordinary circumstances you wouldn’t even bother without some idea where she is; there are too many places she’s allowed to go where you’re not. But like half of those are still inaccessible, and the restrictions have been lifted on most of the rest.

You find her in a recently excavated perfect jade respiteblock you are pretty sure is not hers. The uniform jackets with an unfamiliar sign on the breast are a strong hint. Wait, not unfamiliar – that was the sign of one of the other perfect jades from your intake round. 

From her expression, you’re guessing the owner was one of the fatalities. The permanent fatalities.

“Hey,” you say. “…Efessa or Salzey?” See, you can remember people’s names.

“Efessa. Salzey’s incapacitated for a while, but she’ll recover.”

You can’t, however, remember which of them was the one who referred to Kebela’s hanging out with you as “slumming”. You guess it doesn’t matter. You wrap an arm around Kebela’s shoulders and let her mourn for a bit. But you did come here for a reason.

“Look, um… Maryam’s Fleet friends told me what she’s been up to, or what they think she’s been up to. I’m embarrassed to admit I had to look up what a Matriorb even is…”

Kebela goes almost as white as the rash of rainbow drinkers. “I can’t talk about that.”

Soooo, the Fleet friends were definitely right. Good to know.


	213. ==> BE EQUIUS [decorating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius: Accidentally creep out your co-workers

==> BE EQUIUS

They SAID you could decorate your workstation, so you hung up a few art prints. They’re very nice ones, too. You don’t know why people walking by keep making choking noises and dropping things. It’s FINE ART. Prints, but fine art!

You’re STRONGLY glad you just hung up prints, not any originals, when you come in for your shift and find someone has painted clothing onto all the musclebeasts.


	214. ==> BE ARADIA [contemplating]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia: contemplate growth of Terrifying Ghost Army

==> BE ARADIA

Karkat and Feferi, then Gamzee (and Perlen and Caterpillar). Then a lot of Overbear’s victims, some but not all of whom have left. Then Vriska and Vriska’s recon mission fellow ghosts, and most recently Nepeta’s late colleague.

You never PLANNED to have a terrifying ghost army. It just sort of happened.

You’re not complaining, though.

…although it will be good to get more space when you get your permanent posting.


	215. ==> BE VRISKA [lobbying]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska: Harass the shout leader

==> BE VRISKA

“Please?”

“No.”

“Pleeeeeeeease?”

Karkat rolls his eyes – interesting how he can still do that so distinctly with solid white. “I’m busy.”

“You’re not busy with anything NOW. Come on, we just need someone to be the harbormaster! It’s just a few scenes!”

“I don’t FLARP!”

“This isn’t FLARPing!”

“Same difference!”


	216. ==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Scarf Girl: yarnbomb. Is it visible to non-necropaths?

==> BE ALESSE DALYCE

You honestly weren’t expecting anyone but ghosts to even notice – and necropaths, obviously, but ghosts were the intended audience. But about one in ten officers entering the command does a double take and stares at the new console cozies. Most of them seem to lose sight of them when they try to look harder, but a few are left unable to see their workstation through crocheted blankets they can’t touch.


	217. ==> BE GAMZEE [helping]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k Gamzee: try and help people as a friendly ghost

==> BE GAMZEE

It can be hard to help with little things, as a ghost. With big things usually people need help so bad they won’t ask too many questions. But with little things, sometimes people get really weird if a ghost starts helping. So you usually stick to providing supportive musical accompaniment.


	218. ==> BE KANAYA [socializing]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: talk to other rainbow drinkers

==> BE KANAYA

There are a half dozen new rainbow drinkers after the cave-in. The four of you still in novitiate status are all stuck in the same medical block for observation. You find this rather unjust, as it was Attender Dayvigil who almost exsanguinated her rescuers, yet they let her leave.

One of them does keep trying to get someone to let her bite them, and it’s getting a little disturbing. And there’s a very stupid argument about whether a non-perfect jade who becomes a rainbow drinker is honorarily perfect. It goes on for a very long time.

You break up the fight by letting the others take a look at “Auspistice of the Rainbow Drinkers”. They are THOROUGHLY distracted.


	219. ==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Turtur: Pre-emptive helmsman treatment responsibility guilt time?

==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

You don’t actually know that much about helmsmen. It was just one more atrocity going on in a fleet full of them, and one of the things Cannis does for you is remind you not to tear yourself apart over things you can’t change. If you’d looked into it you would have torn yourself apart over it, so.

But now there may be something you can do. Maybe. If you can do it without endangering this position Cannis somehow managed to get for you. You don’t know how she paid for it. (If Kellep knows, he wouldn’t tell you if Cannis won’t, but Jorjel Inderc probably would. You can’t decide if you should ask. For now you’re waiting for Cannis.)

You don’t know if the helmsman looked good or bad. He wasn’t SHOWING distress, at least?

After a read through the logs kept by your predecessor – both sets – you’re pretty sure this extra power drain stuff killed the last helmsman. You don’t want to be complicit in doing the same thing to this one.


	220. ==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Turtur: Talk to the Helmsman.

==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

The helmsman is your age, which you knew from the background information but maybe hadn’t fully processed. With the goggles you can’t tell if he’s tracking anything.

“Hi,” you say, ignoring the helmstechs’ incredulous stares. “I’m Turtur Pachex, I’m the new power tech. This is new to me, so I hope you can bear with me as I figure out what I’m doing.”

He doesn’t reply, which isn’t surprising. “What’s his name?” you ask.

“The old one was Forkhorns,” a helmstech says. “So this one is–”

“Twinhorns?” you guess.

One of the senior helmstechs gasps like you’ve just proposed flying into a sun. “Don’t say that!”


	221. OC Intros

Your name is BACKWING, and you never planned to spend your career nursing other people’s quadrants along. It just sort of turned out that way. You are SOCIAL and GOOD AT VERBAL COMMUNICATION, possibly related to how your lusus is a parrot and can ACTUALLY TALK, although she isn’t talking every time she makes noises that sound like words.

You ended up on this ship at Conscription thanks to your SEADWELLER THEN-MATESPRIT, who broke up with you a few sweeps later. It was fairly amicable. She didn’t try to THROW YOU OFF THE SHIP or anything. After that, you had to find a NEW PURPOSE.

Your Trollian handle is crashLanding, and you type like a grown-up except for occasionally, when you get really worked up about something, and everything! comes! out! excited! But that tends to annoy people, so you try to avoid it.

* * *

Your name is TRUBLADE, at least for a while longer. You were mostly sticking around because of Overbear, and with him gone, you’re… drifting.

You DON’T REGRET accusing him, even though it didn’t work out. Your accusation helped, eventually, and it was your duty to do. When Overbear had you pinned in the duel, he asked WHO YOU WERE AVENGING, and didn’t believe you when you said no one.

* * *

Your name is BRUTAL DOMINATION OF INFERIORS, but your friends call you DOMI. Your friends are all OTHER SHIPS, although some of them prefer to think of themselves as HELMSTROLLS. You don’t argue with them about it. They’ll probably understand eventually. Maybe not if they keep their troll friends, though. You aren’t… quite jealous about that? You have your TECHS. You’re reasonably comfortable with your techs. They were GRATIFYINGLY HORRIFIED when Overbear’s sabotage was discovered, at least.

You message your friends as brutalDomination, and your typing is precise and technically correct.

* * *

Your name is SKELETON. You’re one of – to the best of your knowledge – ninety-one dead necropaths named Skeleton somewhere in the Fleet. Another one of them wants to have a SKELETON PARTY when you hit one hundred. You like the idea but aren’t sure how it would be implemented.

You’ve been a ghost for OVER FIVE HUNDRED SWEEPS. You were ALIVE for a while before that, but the details have gotten a little FUZZY. That’s all right; you’re pretty sure there are plenty of live highbloods who are fuzzy about what they were doing even a hundred sweeps ago.

You just recently picked up the username justSkeleton, and AREN’T TRYING ANYTHING FANCY WITH YOUR TYPING JUST YET.

* * *

Your name is TRUEPAIN, but at this point you also answer to SUREPAIN. You spend much of your time discussing PHILOSOPHY and PROPHECY with other DEAD SIGNLESSISTS. You also try to help some newly executed ghosts find their metaphorical feet.

You think you are a ghost because you died RELATIVELY YOUNG and RELATIVELY STUPIDLY. You would like to do more actively subversive things than you dared try when you were alive, but your options are SOMEWHAT LIMITED.

It’s been a long time since you typed anything, but if you were typing now, you’d drop 69s everywhere.

* * *

Your name is CHIDRO ARCTIF, and you coulda been a star. Well, you were a star BRIEFLY, and you’d been accepted into the propagandart program, but you didn’t have time to GET ANYWHERE before you met a HIGHLY-PLACED PATRON who TOOK AN INTEREST in you and, well, it TURNED OUT BADLY.

You spent two sweeps as a GHOST WITH YOUR FACE SMASHED IN, and you are not really over it. But now you teach GHOST GUITAR LESSONS. Score.

You don’t really remember what your typing quirk was, but you think your handle was cosmicMelody.

* * *

Your name is PERSES RESHKI, and you are the WORST JADEBLOOD. You are NOT SUN-TOLERANT. You don’t want anything to do with GRUBS, not even on the other end of a CULLING FORK. In fact the first time they gave you a culling fork you literally STABBED YOURSELF IN THE FOOT. The only upside of being here is being near your MOIRAIL, because you are SHIT AT MAKING FRIENDS and should just keep the ones you have.

You do COMPUTERS, and you are good at them. You think you could have done reasonably well as a TEAL in FLEET IT, but that’s not the kind of thing you can say to people. You have had it up to HERE with TERMITE-BASED COMPUTING.

Your Trollian handle is disorderlyImpulse, and you mak= on= substitution.

* * *

Your name is COLONEL OVERBEAR, and you are a proud RUFFIANNIHILATOR, or at least that is what you say if people ask you. Honestly the shine wore off ruffiannihilation a long time ago. Charging around randomly slaughtering things is neither challenging nor stimulating. To keep yourself entertained you pursue relationships with YOUNG, NOT-YET-JADED NEW CONSCRIPTS. Then, after you get tired of them, you GET RID of them, most commonly by KILLING them, unless they’ve become intolerably boring.

You have gotten away with this (almost) without a hitch for a VERY LONG TIME.

Your Trollian handle, which you use mainly for communicating with your young quadrants, is voicedExperience, and you type like a grown-up.

* * *

Your name is INQUISITORMENTOR SHARPEYE, and you USED TO HAVE a lot of lofty ideas about legislaceration. You GOT OVER IT, before it could get you killed. You DO YOUR JOB.

You don’t generally advertise that you’re blind in one eye, but it doesn’t interfere with your work, so it’s not critical that it be secret.

You OBSESSIVELY PEOPLE-WATCH, for ENTERTAINMENT, SAFETY, and PROFESSIONAL PURPOSES, and you are the person to ask about other people’s relationships. You especially try to WATCH OUT FOR THE KIDS – er, NEW TRAINEES – because NO ONE ELSE DOES. You win some, you lose some. (Fucking crocodile.)

(Your own lusus is a foxbeast, and you wish she wouldn’t tease the bigger lusii so much, but she seems to feel you don’t get in enough mischief any more so she has to do it for both of you.)

You lurk more than you contribute on message boards, but when you do your (non-professional) handle is bushyTailed.

* * *

Your name is CANNIS SKAREE, and you weren’t always THIS tightly wound. You always had to deal with your lusus, who EATS SOME TROLLS and WANTS TO EAT MORE TROLLS, and trying to exercise control over what (and who) she ate. You always used to relax (and cool off your frustration) by going FLYING. You MISS FLYING.

But now you are DESPERATE. You don’t like to admit it, but you’ve been desperate since you GOT HERE. Even if no one says so, the Fleet is a COMPETITION, and the LOSERS DIE. So you have to be a WINNER. And you have to make sure your FRIENDS at least DON’T LOSE. It’s the only acceptable option.

Your Trollian handle is sighthoundsTrajectory, and you bring up your sign e>>ery so often.

* * *

Your name is CAPTAIN FARSIGHT, and you are happy with your life. You conduct RECONNAISSANCE with your CLOSE-KNIT CREW. Occasionally they throw some other people at you, but they usually don’t last long enough to be real trouble.

[Not a whole lot to say about Farsight.]

* * *

Your name is PANTHE SILBER, and you have a HISTORY of being FREQUENTLY DISPLEASED. It’s related to the psychic-power-induced MIGRAINES you suffered for most of your life. However you would NOT describe your attitude as sulky.

You finally CONTROLLED YOUR POWERS, just in time to GET YOURSELF KILLED with them. It turns out that being thoroughly meshed with a person when they die is a BAD IDEA. Oops. You are consoled by how Overbear was presumably very frustrated. Your only regret is you’re NOT SURE whether what you did is related to Amiety never showing up as a ghost.

Your Trollian handle is supposed to be argentWings, not sulkyPsychic, and you did some fancy stuff with special characters you probably won’t be up to trying for a while.

* * *

Your name is HESTEN BOETIA, and you are a LOT MORE THAN YOUR MATESPRITSHIP. Unfortunately your MATESPRIT CANNOT SEEM TO REMEMBER THAT.

Unfortunately, your matesprit is UNRESPONSIVE to any and all BREAKUP ATTEMPTS.

You are a CRACK SHOT with all sorts of distance weapons. You feel this makes the ARCHERADICATORS your obvious choice. Your MATESPRIT FELT DIFFERENTLY. So instead, you are a BORED, POINTLESS SECURITY PERSON.

Your Trollian handle is stolidHunter, and yo-o-ou repro-o-oduce yo-o-our sign where co-o-onvenient.

* * *

You are The Gleeful Abandon

Your name is… LEELEE, for all practical purposes. At least that’s all anyone ever calls you, besides HELMSMAN. You are a POWER SOURCE. That’s about it. It’s okay because this way you can ignore THE REST OF THE SHIP.

You like to watch MOVIES. Sometimes you share them with your techs. Half your techs are on ILLEGAL TRANQUILIZERS. You don’t blame them because they DO have to go into the rest of the ship.

You haven’t thought about the UNIVERSE OUTSIDE THE ENGINEBLOCK in a LONG TIME.

* * *

Your name is MOLLYM AWWAKK [pre-Conscription] and you are GOING PLACES. Most immediately, you are going BACK INTO THE OCEAN, because your PROTOTYPE SUBMERSIBLE SEAPLANE still isn’t working very well.

Your lusus is a HAMMERHEAD ALBATROSS, and while she can go underwater with you, it is a source of continual frustration to you that you CANNOT FLY. You ordered the light aircraft construction kit when you were four, and you think you did a rather good job assembling it, but unfortunately you did not realize until too late it was not designed to take off from underwater, or even BE underwater, piece of crap.

You are building your own. When you are done it will be far superior. You are having some FUELING PROBLEMS, which you think could be easily solved with a PSIONIC POWER SOURCE, but even seadwellers are strongly discouraged from AMATEUR HELMSMAN HOOKUPS, so you are stuck with power cels.

Your trollhandle is volensNolens, and ~all your text is half out of the water~.

* * *

Your name is UNRELENTING PERSECUTION.

…

Or maybe not. Because you died and the ship didn’t, so maybe you weren’t the ship. You definitely aren’t the ship now.

Maybe your name is FORKHORNS.

Maybe your name is… what was it… you should know this, what was the helmsman named…

Once upon a time the helmsman who was you, before he was a helmsman, had a moirail named Mickee who went into the cavalreapers. You think she’s probably dead by now. You think maybe you’ll look for her anyway. Maybe she remembers what your name is.

* * *

Your name is TAGGUE SESSOR. You like pyrotechnic displays and live reefs, though NOT AT THE SAME TIME. You sometimes do some FLARPing but honestly all the rules get BORING FAST and you don’t have a lot of patience for the role-playing.

You also like KILLING THINGS. But that gets BORING, too, unless you have some SOCIAL INTERACTION at the same time.

You have an INFURIATING RIVAL who is NOT SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR RIVAL because you have an AUSPISTICE. All the same you think she UNDERSTANDS YOU BEST.

Your Trollian handle is upcomingTyphoon and you TEND TO BE EMPHATIC.

* * *

Your name is CAPPUL SENNET. You like music and abstract art. You sometimes do some FLARPing but the LOW QUALITY of other players pisses you off and you usually end up cheating to kill them.

You also like KILLING THINGS, especially when there’s some sort of spin on it.

You have an INFURIATING RIVAL who is NOT SUPPOSED TO BE YOUR RIVAL because you have an AUSPISTICE. All the same you think she UNDERSTANDS YOU BEST.

Your Trollian handle is treacherousUndertow and you type in an understated manner.


	222. ==> BE VRISKA [expeditioning]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: POV request: Vriska's jump? (Expedition? Whatever you want to call it.)

==> BE VRISKA

You realize almost immediately that you POSSIBLY should have waited to consult people and maybe get some advice. Too late now. Ooops.

It’s like freefall through absolute nothingness. It’s terrifying, but also a little exhilarating.

You land hard in… exactly the position you died in. The door’s right through your abdomen. Even though you’ve gone through walls more times than you can count, it still takes you a minute to pull yourself all the way through

You fix your crush injuries.

You lose the uniform for civilian clothes and put your arm and eye back.

Much better.

Giving in to temptation, you look around the ship, but the crew’s different and not doing anything interesting. There aren’t any new ghosts. Time to go back and tell everyone long-distance jumps are fine!

This direction you don’t have your death to focus on, so you think hard about Karkat and Feferi and Aradia. That ought to be enough of a beacon, right?

…Wrong.


	223. ==> BE PAST SHARPEYE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sharpeye POV: survive your job

==> BE KITSUN ALTHEA

Your supervisor said it was a nice easy case for you, open-and-shut, and low risk – black marketeer, not accused of anything violent, non-psychic midblue, no need to have guards in the inquisitormentblock. You did your own research anyway, fortunately. Of course he wasn’t ACCUSED of ripping out a rustblood’s throat with his beautifully well-kept claws. That wasn’t a crime. Neither was the other rustblood, or the brownblood, or – he does realize there are other methods of conflict resolution, doesn’t he?

You wear a turtleneck under your uniform jacket and hide a gorget under the turtleneck.

When you confront him with the evidence of his guilt and he tries to rip your throat out, his claws skid off the gorget. One nail slides up your face, digging deeper as he lunges towards you–

Barbarrister Justwhip bursts into the room and gets him in a headlock. “Attacking an investigator in the course of her duties, Lastline?”

Justwhip isn’t the kind of barbarrister who will excuse a junior for an injury. You press a handkerchief to your face to try to stop the bleeding, and brush your hair forward to completely obscure your right eye.

You’re alive. You’ll take it.


	224. ==> BE ERIDAN [perplexed]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: pov: eridans thoughts by himself after finding out Feferi is still around?

==> BE ERIDAN

Fef is okay. Except for being dead. Which is a big caveat. But. Typing and smiling and– Okay.

Except for being dead.

Your life is very weird.


	225. ==> BE PAST MAJOR TRUBLADE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Trublade POV: What led you to accusing Overbear?

==> BE PAST MAJOR TRUBLADE

It’s not uncommon for new conscripts to die, even highbloods. There’s always a certain rate of attrition. You know that, you understand that, it’s not new. Young and stupid trolls die in stupid ways.

“That’s rough, but that’s a risk when you date someone that young,” you thought, when Overbear’s matesprit died not long after you transferred to the ‘Brutal Domination’.

“He’s dating someone ELSE that young?” you thought, under a quarter of a sweep later. “Risky!”

“Bad luck,” you thought, when that one died. “Maybe he’ll learn his lesson this time.”

“Maybe he only LIKES young trolls?” you thought, less than a quarter of a sweep after that. “That’s… kind of creepy. Apparently it’s its own punishment though.”

“…Of course being a young conscript doesn’t generally have a 100% death rate,” you thought, half a sweep after that, but you carefully didn’t think any more. Overbear was your superior. Besides, his quadrants didn’t have a hundred percent death rate either. There was one he broke up with half a sweep into the relationship. Kid was kind of a wreck.

“Maybe a 95% death rate,” you decided, three sweeps after that. “Always young. Always relatively soon. Usually ambiguously.”

“I can’t be the only person who’s noticed this.”

You weren’t. But you were the only one willing to say anything.


	226. ==> BE ERIDAN [bereft]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: POV of eridan looking at an old moirail quadrant gift from fef

==> BE ERIDAN

You can’t.

You got rid of everything.

You know you made a spectacle of yourself already, you have to convince them you’re over it.


	227. Q&A V

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Edited 10/23/2016 because I found some questions that had never been tagged/archived.

**Q: Kanaya: Does the Matriorb look any different as it gets closer to hatching? How long is it expected to incubate for anyway?**

Kanaya: It’s been… growing.  
Kanaya: The shape has changed some.  
Kanaya: I think… it takes as long as it takes.  
Kanaya: Honestly I’m hoping it doesn’t hatch until everyone has agreed on the proper way of rearing a new Mother Grub.  
Kanaya: …And how and when the transition should be.

* * *

**Q: Anyone appropriate (or amusing): Only 40% of jadebloods can become rainbowdrinkers? What needs to happen for a jadeblood to successfully become a rainbowdrinker, then?**

Oncetold: That’s a rough estimate.  
Oncetold: There’s this… colonial fungal organism. Mostly fungal, anyway.  
Oncetold: It CAN live in trolls besides jades, but mostly jades are the only ones who get enough sunlight for it to… mature.  
Oncetold: If the troll is severely injured in the right way when the… organism is at the right stage of maturity, you get what is popularly identified as a rainbow drinker. Glows, consumes blood, hard to kill.  
Oncetold: Forty percent is the estimated proportion of carriers of the organism, based on some study back before I even got here.  
Oncetold: Or they may just give a number under fifty percent to discourage people from fatally injuring themselves in the hopes that they’ll turn out to be rainbow drinkers. Critical injuries aren’t that common here. Or weren’t until just recently. Of the injuries I know of that could have yielded rainbow drinkers, I think more than half did?  
Oncetold: It’s kind of a mystery?  
Oncetold: Pretty sure Reshki wouldn’t, though!

* * *

**Q: Corpsepap: Any chance of moving on soon?**

Admin Jannin Lepsir: If by “moving on”, you mean “move on to wherever people go when their ghosts aren’t hanging around anymore”, Officer Bluemind is… VAGUE enough I expect she will “move on” very PROMPTLY – at the end of her MID-BLUE LIFESPAN.  
Admin Jannin Lepsir: If by “moving on” you mean “trying to meet someone new and/or in some other way interact mainly with the same world most people do” – then I really, really doubt it.

* * *

**Q: [head of Inner Caverns]: Who's watching the Mothergrub now?**

Altadona: The Mother Grub has extra attendants to ensure she remains calm while we assess the stability of the caverns.  
Altadona: The Matriorb is currently with Attenders Vigilant and Faithful.  
Altadona: …In my personal bathtub. The deeper parts of the caverns where we would prefer to keep it are somewhat chaotic.

* * *

**Q: Feferi karkat or gamzee: Be not sure how you feel about not having passed your genes on before dying.**

Karkat: I feel morally upright about it is how I feel.  
Karkat: I’m sure there will be future trolls somewhere awful enough to deserve being stuck with this blood, but they aren’t the ones who’d get it.  
Karkat: I don’t see why anyone would want my genes and I don’t want to share them anyway.  
Karkat: So there.  
Karkat: And I’m about 70% sure Feferi had a drunken bucket hookup with one of my neighbors. But don’t tell Eridan.  
Karkat: Gamzee had better not have passed on his genes while he was getting high in my storage block with that particularly stupid BucketList appointment.

* * *

**Q: Aradia: Explain to readers if grubs can have ghosts and if that might cause problems on alternia**

Aradia: I’ve never seen one. Of course I’ve never been to the brooding caverns, either.  
Aradia: My guess is they CAN, it’s just rare, and they don’t last long.  
Aradia: If they did there’d be grub ghosts everywhere.

* * *

**Q: Nepeta: Keeping up with any artistic purrrsuits in your spare time? Or does security take up all your time?**

Nepeta: I’m afurraid I don’t have the SPACE to do much real physical painting.  
Nepeta: :((  
Nepeta: I have my drawing tablet, though, so I do my best there!

* * *

**Q: Terezi: Be hired by Equius to track down painting defiler**

Terezi: But I am in inquisitorment!  
Terezi: Bring me the wrongdoer and I will make them confess!  
Terezi: Or bring me not-the-wrongdoer and I’ll figure out they don’t need to confess, as the case may be.  
Terezi: I am, alas, not in charge of the tracking down.  
Terezi: I suppose I could track down wrongdoers on my own time?  
Terezi: But in this case I think I might recuse myself out of compassion.

* * *

**Q: Kanaya: hunt daywalkers for stress relief**

Kanaya: …  
Kanaya: I still have two broken femurs.  
Kanaya: However someone did loan our medical ward a multiplayer handheld gaming system with a game about fighting undead.  
Kanaya: I assume they think they are very funny.  
Kanaya: My fellow new rainbow drinkers seem to be enjoying it regardless.  
Kanaya: I had some difficulty working out the controls and my character ended up chainsawing people indiscriminately.  
Kanaya: It was somewhat disturbing.

* * *

**Q: Tavros: hatch a plot. Terezi: make it work**

Tavros: I don’t think I’m really, one of nature’s plotters?  
Tavros: Maybe I could plot to get Frieas haunted by his late quadrant corner?  
Tavros: That might make him cut it out for a while.  
Tavros: I don’t really want, to do anything permanent to him.  
Tavros: He’s just, obnoxious?  
Tavros: Maybe Terezi could plot a scheme and I could make it happen.  
Terezi: How about a scheme to get rid of that giant gold dog statue, I tripped over it yesterday.

* * *

**Q: Skaree: So...what did you have to do to get this?**

Skaree: Admit – confirm, I guess, she guessed – to Pyrope that my moirail doesn’t want to kill aliens and I’m covering for her. Which gives her blackmail material over both of us, and the information that if you want to get me to do anything Turtur’s where to push.   
Skaree: And I promised unspecified favors at some future time.   
Skaree: So basically Pyrope now owns me.   
Skaree: But I’m not worth being me without Turtur, so it’s worth it.   
Skaree: Don’t get me wrong, I love Mustel, even if he is a giant sap – but Turtur makes me… makes me someone worth loving.   
Skaree: Maybe it only makes sense if you have a troll-eating lusus, I don’t know.   
Skaree: She’s tried to convince me I’d be okay without her, but… No.

* * *

**Q: 0k Tavros, since the medicullers like keeping you on that ship, will they take over repairing your legs/making sure you get new ones when you grow too big for the current pair?**

Tavros: …Good question. I hadn’t considered that.  
Tavros: …Probably?  
Tavros: I think if they don’t, um, as my moirail it wouldn’t be strange for Terezi to ask Equius to replace them.

* * *

**Q: 0k equius: Are there any lusii on your ship that are majestic and you find nice to view? And 0k tavros: Are any of the lusii you deal with actually pretty nice when not eating folks?**

Equius: Many of them are majestic  
Equius: None are as majestic as Aurthour   
Equius: …  
Equius: In my personal opinion  
Equius: The nearest runner-up is probably a winged hoofbeast.

Tavros: Well, most of them are nice to their trolls!  
Tavros: The crocodile isn’t so bad when he’s not hungry.   
Tavros: Or, um, annoyed.  
Tavros: Same with a lot of the others.   
Tavros: Some of them want to hunt for entertainment, though – and the centipede is always hungry.

* * *

**Q: Other adults from Overbear's ship, any tactics you had for keeping protege's of your own safe?**

Alesse: If they’re purple themselves, they might forbid a favorite trainee from having any quadrants until they’re older.   
Alesse: That didn’t work as well for anyone else since Overbear could just sort of… overrule them.  
Alesse: I think it wasn’t uncommon to send favorite trainees to other ships for ‘broader experiences’.  
Alesse: And there was desperately trying to keep them out of his way on this ship.

* * *

**Q: 0k Eridan: Do something nice for Nepeta, you know, keep the cover up.**

Eridan: It turns out she really likes rare meat!  
Eridan: I sent her a box of steaks.

(Nepeta: We have had to improvise a freezebox in the spare recuperacoon.  
Nepeta: They’re very good steaks, though!)

* * *

**Q: 0k Equius: Do something nice for Eridan, you do owe him a lot**

Equius: I would very much like to.   
Equius: However, historically speaking, my gestures of gratitude have not been particularly well received by anyone except Nepeta.  
Equius: Even when, to thank Vantas for the hospitality of his hive approaching Conscription, I offered some of the finest lusus-milk cheese…  
Equius: Well, I have just let him know that I owe him.

* * *

**Q: Have the necropaths of the Bureau ever had to deal with an overly attentive or otherwise bad officer? I assume none of the living ones have because lifespan, but what about the dead ones?**

Skeleton: Bluemind/Corpsepap is unusually lax, true. But while it’s not uncommon for necropaths to have to work a little harder to get around the authorities, an actively BAD officer is… relatively rare.  
Skeleton: Things… tend to happen to them.

* * *

**Q: Random 0k jadeblood: What's the most outlandish rumor you've heard in regards to the likely ghost situation in the caverns?**

Ashtar: The most outlandish… hmm. The most OUTLANDISH rumors are always about sex.  
Ashtar: …Like, anywhere. The most outlandish rumors are always about sex.  
Ashtar: I don’t even know.  
Ashtar: Here, rumors often also involve slurry!  
Ashtar: And rainbow drinkers.  
Ashtar: So, the most outlandish rumor is probably, umm…  
Ashtar: The ghost is angry because she was drowned in slurry by her angry rainbow drinker ex-matesprit.  
Ashtar: After they had sex.  
Perses: You JUST MADE THAT UP OFF THE TOP OF YOUR HEAD!

Perses: I heard someone saying the Mother Grub is very ill because of clown cultists poisoning slurry.  
Ashtar: That doesn’t have to do with ghosts.  
Perses: It has to do with the – general situation. Never mind.

Kebela: Um… That it’s supposed to happen. Because the world is supposed to end.  
Kebela: I don’t think there’s much room to argue that since the Matriorb is actually kind of associated with the Second Signless, but–  
Kebela: There are some nihilistic people around here.

* * *

**Q: aradia pov: realize not all problems must be solved via ghost army**

Aradia: I… know that?  
Karkat: But most problems CAN be solved with terrifying ghost army!

* * *

**Q: If Ananas does end up joining the Terrifying Ghost Army one day, she and Chidro should totally team up and do a performance together. She said once that she was into doing light shows with her psionics, right? Heck, maybe they can get Karkat to do screamo with Chidro, Ananas, Gamzee, and Cephal as instrumental backup while Ananas does lights. Or drop the Karkat angle and just grab someone to do one of those ballads about him and Feferi.**

Karkat: ABSOLUTELY NOT!!!  
Chidro: Oooooh, pyrotechnics!  
Karkat: WHAT BALLADS??!!


	228. ==> BE KANAYA [dealing... literature?]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Kanaya: Accidentally become an illicit dealer in Rainbow Drinker pornography

==> BE KANAYA

“Auspistice of the Rainbow Drinkers” is LITERATURE, not pornography. There’s an infamously bad movie loosely based on it which is definitely pornography, but the book is a classic of gothic romance.

…The illustrations in the 500th-anniversary edition may qualify it as erotica.

At any rate it’s a little discomfiting when people ask you for copies of more of the illustrations, partially because of the content and partially because you’re very aware it was illegally obtained and it’s not impossible someone could get in trouble for it. Probably Perses, since intellectual property theft isn’t worth contacting the Fleet about.

When you mention it to Perses, she thanks you for your concern but shrugs it off. “As far as I can tell that’s not the kind of illegal they worry about. If it would piss off the Empress, that’s a problem. The subjugglators, maybe a problem. Some porn publisher, not a problem.”

“It’s literature.”

All the files get loaded onto the novitiate server for public access. People still ask you about it.


	229. ==> BE KARKAT [in character]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Karkat: Somehow get roped into playing an npc for the GLARP, take it way too seriously. You're definitely *not* having a good time though.

==> BE KARKAT

“What the fuck was that?!” Vriska yells, when the dust (and clothing detergent) has settled.

“I’m defending the harbor!” you shout back, and sling another clothes-flattening-surface at the gamblignant landing party.

“I just told you to shout imprecations! You’re really good at that!”

“No, you ASKED me to be the harbormaster, a retired threshecutioner! I’m staying in character!”

She makes an inarticulate noise and turns to the rest of her group. “All right, who came up with the threshie part?!”

You let them talk, but begin readying your next barrage. A vaguely familiar live tealblood eyes the – to her – mysterious floating clothes-whitener, gulps, and huddles further down between clothing agitators.


	230. ==> BE SHARPEYE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sharpeye: Realize the depths of what Terezi's dug up on Overbear.

==> BE SHARPEYE

You’re expecting Leybar, and Arctif isn’t much of a surprise, and – yeah, she has everything in the unofficial Brutal Domination Dead Conscripts file one of the investerrogators has been keeping for the past fourteen sweeps or so. But she has older ones, too – some MUCH older – she must have found a way into the Fleet remote archives–

You pause on an image of Vissin Stuary’s mangled body. If it could be conclusively linked to him, it could really accomplish something.

Unfortunately you’re not sure any of it – even all of it together – is enough to START an investigation of Overbear. It’ll have to go in the highblood-possible-crimes queue for the purple barbarristers to review. Until then, unless there’s an external credible (read: highblooded) accusation, your hands are tied.


	231. ==> BE SOLLUX [keeping entertained]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Sollux: Mess with your new rescue-troll. New kid. Whatsherface.

==> BE SOLLUX

You really don’t have the concentration to spare for this, but it was a great opportunity. You had to do it, really.

Pachex’s personal music library includes “Double Trouble”. You fuck with her shuffle settings so it comes up all the damn time. She tries to figure out why, but of course she can’t. Inevitably, it gets stuck in her head, and she starts humming it occasionally.

Inevitably, someone humming “Double Trouble” in your presence makes Turnover VERY nervous. He blows up at Pachex to make her stop.

Wireburn blows up at Turnover for letting superstition disrupt coordination and teamwork.

Greasy and Bucket Face try to hide from the Turnover/Wireburn fight, end up in the same storage compartment, and get ash-serenaded by Gamzee.

Priceless.


	232. Adult Name Brainstorming

**All living trolls from the main 12: have you had any ideas about your adult name, and what are the rules about it?**

Terezi: Aim for eight letters, you can do nine if you don’t mind people thinking you’re a bit sloppy. You’re not REQUIRED to take one at all, but if you’re a highblood over fifty sweeps or so without one people will start looking at you funny.

Terezi: I want to do something involving eyes or sight, maybe even blindness since I’m not keeping it secret. “Trusight” is actually pretty common, so probably not that. I COULD do Redglare but I probably won’t.

Aradia: Someone suggested I should be OShitHer. I appreciate the compliment, but no. Someone else suggested Preghost, but I don’t think it flows very well. Antegost? Ghosting? If I do pick something it will probably involve ghosts somehow.

Tavros: …My coworkers are, um, already calling me The Wrangler. It’s… lowbloods hardly ever get a “the” title, so it’s sort of a joke? But it is… sort of flattering.

Sollux: Helmsmen don’t get to choose adult names. We get called by the ship name or get nicknamed by helmstechs, or both. Those of us in intermediate systems get to choose how we introduce ourselves – I’m sticking with twinArmageddons.

Eridan: I have no idea right now.

Equius: I am also unsure. But not Blusweat. Or Sweatboy. Or anything else involving sweat.

Nepeta: Something with “claw”. Trueclaw? Clawtrue? Truclaws? Clawclaw?

Equius: …

Nepeta: What?

(And left out of the first round:)

Kanaya: I am still keeping my options open. I don’t think I want anything directly referring to the Matriorb, though some people seem to be assuming I should.  
Kanaya: I will also not be taking “Chainsaw”.

* * *

**Terezi: what about Redsight?**

Terezi: Hmmm, I’ll put it on the list.  
Tavros: Wouldn’t it, um, sort of imply you’re SEEING all red?

* * *

**Terezi: Consider Hangsman or Hangwoman**

Terezi: I believe a legislacerator may not be able to do that without special permission! I would have to look it up.  
Tavros: I don’t like it much anyway.  
Terezi: I think it has a certain something.  
Terezi: Nooseeye?  
Tavros: *facepalm*

* * *

**Aradia: Consider "Hauntress" (even though it has nine letters) or "Manester" (going off of "manes," which, according to mythology, are the "deified souls of dead ancestors") as a title?**

Aradia: …“Hauntrix” has eight!  
Aradia: That’s not bad at all.  
Aradia: I may give it a little while yet, though. I think if I tried to register an adult name right now, someone really might give me OShitHer.

* * *

**Equius: Consider "Engineer" as a title? Or something to do with robots?**

Equius: I would be deeply honored to be granted the title of Engineer. Perhaps if I distinguish myself in the field.

One Of Equius’s Coworkers: Robobutt! ROBOBUTT!

* * *

**Terezi: How about BurntEye**

Terezi: Okay, that one I LIKE. Short list for sure.  
Tavros: Yes! I like that one too.  
Terezi: You just want me to take Nooseeye off the short list.

* * *

**Nooseeye is great because noose-eye AND no-see-eye**

Terezi: >:]

* * *

**Tavros, it may be a bit obvious but what about longhorn? Terezi, scareye? Lickview? Licklook?**

Tavros: If I need one, and I can’t think of something more inspired, that would be acceptable.  
Terezi: Um, probably not on the short list. But definitely something to tell people I don’t want to tell!

* * *

**For terezi, what about courtview? Justview? Lawguard?**

Terezi: …Maybe? I think that’s a little… bland.

* * *

**I think Mindseye would be cool for Terezi's adult name**

Terezi: Could work, could work… [Would work even better for a Terezi who knew about classpects.]

* * *

**Kanaya: how about Huntress, and Nepeta; what about Quikclaw**

Kanaya: I can’t say that… particularly speaks to me.  
Nepeta: That could work!  
Equius: Better than Clawclaw.  
Nepeta: I LIKE Clawclaw!

* * *

**Kanaya: Consider the name Sapphist**

Kanaya: I don’t think I understand that reference.  
[Reference explained]  
Kanaya: Oh.  
Kanaya: Well, I will not say that is inaccurate. However, it would also describe a majority of other jadebloods, and be very obscure, so no.

* * *

**no silly, Equius is the STRONGest**

Equius: That would be very flattering.

* * *

**wouldn't robobutt be better for Tavros?**

Tavros: Amputation at MID-THIGH.

* * *

**0k Karkat, Vriska, Gamzee, and Feferi: are you going to pick up a title eventually as well or just use your name / acronym for all of ghosternity?**

Karkat: That’s stupid.  
Feferi: …That may be the best idea I’ve ever heard.  
Feferi: Karkat, what’s the ghostiest deep-sea fish you can think of?  
Karkat: I can’t think of any deep-sea fish, and this is stupid.  
Vriska: COMEBACK!  
Gamzee: Something with music maybe?  
Feferi: Upweller? Oooohhhh, Anglerist.  
Karkat: Okay. Fine. I’ll be Phantom.

* * *

**0k karkat noooo Phantom is seven letters you need something else**

Karkat: Phantom! With the shout pole.  
Gamzee: Ghostguy?  
Karkat: …  
Aradia: The Long-Suffering?

* * *

**0k Karkat: Overbose? That is 'Over' and 'Verbose' smushed together? Because you talk a lot when you get going, and as a bonus the ending sounds kind of like 'boss' if you say it real quick. Kanaya: How about Daybreak? Powerful, beautiful, and totally you.**

Karkat: Ha fucking ha. No.

Kanaya: …I like that very much.

* * *

**0k Karkat - Shoutboy**

Karkat: I take back everything I said about Overbose.

* * *

**0k Gamzee: How about Soulsong? It combines your religious and musical interests and it also sounds kind of cool in a ghosty way.**

Gamzee: That does have a real melodious kinda ring to it.   
Gamzee: :o)

* * *

**0k Karkat: Memoriam or Phantasm?**

Karkat: Until further notice my planned future name is The Long-Suffering. I DON’T CARE IF IT’S TOO LONG.

* * *

**Kanaya should just go all the way, be the Chainsaw-Wielding Sapphist Clothier Vampirix.**

Kanaya: Perhaps as a title.

* * *

**0k Karkat: You're forgiven for what you said about Overbose. We're just brainstorming here. If you want to go for a disguise type title to keep your identity safe, Ordinary is not the best but it's atleast a possibility. If you add in your passion for leadership and you don't mind 9 letters, you could be Ordernary. Orderist would be 8 but it sounds weird... :-/**

Karkat: …

* * *

**Hey Eridan, if you still like guns you could be "Trueshot" or something. Or Seashoot, as an homage to your seadweller origins?**

Eridan: Eh… Maybe. It feels a little… I don’t know, limiting?   
Eridan: I have plenty of time to decide, they’re not expecting us seadwellers to do anything on that front for ten to fifteen sweeps.

* * *

**Terezi: What about Blindeye, or Sightless?**

Terezi: I think if I go that route Burnteye is more… evocative.

* * *

**Terezi: You could do a reference to your blind lusus, maybe. Dragoness, Dragoon.... maybe Draconic?**

Terezi: I’d love to have a dragon-derived title…

* * *

**Cryptrix, for Aradia? (trix sounds like tricks! as in the massive trick she’s pulling.)**

Aradia: Ooohhhh, could be good.


	233. ==> BE CATERPILLAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Hey Caterpillar, who are you and what's your backstory?

==> BE CATERPILLAR 

If they think the tongue is bad, they should see what you looked like when you died. It was messed up. You died… you think about two sweeps after you were conscripted, and you were Sculptor’s medium almost the whole time.

The tongue you actually did yourself, early on – there was something you really didn’t want to say, and he wasn’t asking, but you were afraid you might say it anyway.

You don’t remember what it was, but you never said it.

You stuck around at first because you didn’t remember how to leave, and then because you at least wanted to do something to decrease Sculptor’s quality of life. But then, before you managed to do much, Sculptor got killed in an idiotic drunken duel over the merits of three-dimensional verses two-dimensional art, and didn’t even show up as a ghost.

After that you just wanted to get yourself in the right shape before moving on, but by the time you managed that, you were a lot closer to together mentally. Not all the way together, of course. But probably well above average for a ghost on the Gleeful Abandon.

And you were just sort of bored and resentful that you’re dead.

Eventually you followed CC, and went with AA, and now you have a new lease on… death.

You aren’t sure what your name is. It may actually have been Catter Pillar. The ‘Catter’ sounds right-ish, at least.


	234. Q&A VI

**Turtur: oh geeze why are there ghosts in the helmsblock**

Turtur: Ghosts in the helmsblock I could understand. I’m sort of surprised all helmsblocks aren’t haunted – but I guess they clear them out.  
Turtur: Ghosts in the public laundryblock was more confusing.  
Turtur: The ghost singing ashsongs at… what were their names… one of them was Essevi maybe? Anyway, musical auspistice ghost was very surprising.

* * *

**Young necropath: No pressure but you're getting contacted to help save the future of your race**

Perses: I haven’t actually gone beyond very vague inquiries. Getting specific could be… messy.  
Perses: I mean, I would have freaked the fuck out if I’d been contacted by the Caverns as a pre-adult, and I’m JADE.  
Perses: These are lowbloods.  
Perses: In their position I’d assume it was a cruel joke trying to set them up for something.  
Perses: I’m hoping Kanaya’s necropath friend will have helpful advice.  
Perses: …Even if that’s worked out, I don’t want to get any non-jade involved unless I’m positive no one will kill them afterwards to restore the purity of the caverns or something.

* * *

**So, Sollux, what is your opinion on Gamzee's guitar skills?**

Sollux: I feel like I should be critical just on principle.  
Sollux: And music’s not really my thing.  
Sollux: And most of the songs are stupid.  
Sollux: He’s… not awful.

* * *

**question kiiiind of aimed at aradia and sollux, but could be answered by anyone else, do helmstrolls get any kind of visits from pale quadrants? At least to keep them from trying to go off the rails or self terminate or whatever?**

Cephal: Intermediate-system helmsmen are allowed to be in CONTACT with pale quadrants – or a variety of other people.  
Cephal: They don’t make it easy for helmsmen to have registered quadrants, but there are ways to get the conciliatory ones on the record if you know the right people or the right backdoors, or if you’re highblooded enough. But helm quadrants are a serious social stigma for highbloods.  
Cephal: If there IS a registered quadrant, they can apply for permission to visit in person. The trouble is the engine crew has to approve it, and most engine crews do not want to deal with that.  
Cephal: And there ARE a few good reasons for that, if you don’t know what you’re doing in a helmsblock it’s easy to either hurt yourself or damage something or both. But mostly it’s bad reasons.  
Cephal: So… sort of, sometimes.  
Ananas: But since Cephal’s a biowire tech I get lots of visits. :)

* * *

**Since helmsemen generally have access to the troll internet and ship systems, would it be possible for them to stream the Nyan Cat song through all the ship's speakers at high volume and then blame mechanical failure and/or ghosts if they get too annoyed at people? Or to do a reproduction of the antics of the "Salt and Pepper Diner" skit?**

Ananas: Uh…. I’m not sure I have access to the right systems for that…  
Sollux: It’s just the public address system, you get into it through the safety override functions.  
Ananas: …  
Sollux: Never mind. Possible, yes, advisable, no. People don’t usually attribute complicated computer things to ghosts when there’s an obvious live culprit.

* * *

**0k prompt: Pale quadrant holiday happens. How would it be celebrated by aradia and sollux, equius and nepeta, terezi and tavros?**

Equius and Nepeta: Equius tries to get her a pass to visit that day, but she can’t – she’s covering shifts for more senior coworkers spending time with their seadweller moirails. She does get a pass for a few days later.

Tavros and Terezi: Go to the shipwide youngish-adult romantic dinner/dance/movie, mostly for shits and giggles. Turns out to be lucky they did because the crocodile lusus crashes the movie.

Sollux and Aradia: She insists she needs to deal with a helmsblock haunting without being disturbed for a few hours, and they hang out. Neither of them says anything about it being a quadrant thing.

(Bonus: Cannis and Turtur both watch the dragon-training documentary while trolling each other; Mustel and Jorjel have a very traditional pale-romantic dinner; Ananas and Cephal don’t really do holidays; Perses forgets despite having three different reminders set in her computer and Kebela has to forgive her again; Karkat is stalked by curious ghost army members all day.)

* * *

**Aradia: request ancestor investigate brooding cavern mishaps**

Skeleton: Oh FUCK no.  
Skeleton: One, we haven’t told her about her ancestor.  
Skeleton: Two, I don’t think anyone thinks it would be a good idea to send the Demoness anywhere NEAR the Mother Grub.  
Skeleton: She destroys.

* * *

**Sollux: Find out that you're expected to contribute to the genetic continuation of the species.**

Sollux: I was pretty disgusted when I found out that was a thing.  
Sollux: But I think it’s not likely to happen to me.  
Sollux: The asshole captain would want to avoid any scrutiny or anything that would interfere with energy output  
Sollux: And Wireburn would be so incensed at the idea of such a thing going on in her engineblock she’d… I don’t know what she’d do.  
Sollux: Whatever. I probably couldn’t if I wanted to.

* * *

**Turtur: Find out that the helmsman is expected to contribute to the genetic continuation of the species. Does he even have the parts for that?!?**

Turtur: …  
Turtur: That’s, uh.  
Turtur: I’m really only supposed to be involved at all in, uh, psionic energy output monitoring and allocation.  
Turtur: So that’s not something I’m supposed to have anything to do with.  
Turtur: Although I guess I could argue it would be bad for efficiency? I don’t know…  
Turtur: I don’t know anything about this…  
Turtur: But I’m pretty sure even the helm hookups that involve amputations only amputate at most arms and legs, so, uh, any relevant parts would be intact? Just, uh, difficult to access.  
Turtur: But I’m not supposed to be involved with wetware at all.  
Turtur: Happily.

* * *

**Karat. Did it hurt when you fell? Or did you just expect it to hurt so it did?**

Karkat: Oh, I was so smart, I THOUGHT of that!  
Karkat: It can’t hurt me, I’m not really affected by it, I thought!  
Karkat: Keep that in mind and it won’t hurt a bit!  
Karkat: And it didn’t!  
Karkat: Unfortunately I FELL THROUGH THE GROUND and only stopped myself at least ten meters DOWN.  
Karkat: Buried ghost digs self out of ground like absolute fucking moron, film at eleven.  
Karkat: Except not, because it was day.

* * *

**How does 'recalling' a ghost work exactly? And how strong do you have to be to do it all the way to alternia?**

Aradia: Ummm, it’s sort of hard to explain.  
Aradia: It’s a lot more intuitive than moving stuff psionically – with that you have to think about mass and trajectories and velocities and interference. With this you just sort of… reach out and grab them.  
Aradia: It’s not too hard with a ghost you know pretty well. You know they’re out there SOMEWHERE, and you want them to be HERE.  
Aradia: It takes more finesse to invite without compelling.  
Aradia: Or to summon or invite a more general category.

Skeleton: Many upper-level necropaths could call a ghost they knew as well as Megido knows her friend from this distance. They just don’t know any ghosts back there.  
Skeleton: Right now I don’t… THINK Megido could summon an unknown ghost to specifications.  
Skeleton: I think.

* * *

**Aradia, should Ag be allowed planet side? She killed A LOT of trolls. Statistically there have to be a few hanging around that maybe just finally got some power behind them and they might be holding a non sexy grudge.**

Aradia: Well, I definitely wouldn’t advise her to check out her old hive!  
Aradia: Barring that it should be fine.  
Aradia: Even if they’ve gotten strong enough to travel, there’s no reason they would.  
Aradia: No one would expect her to come back from Conscription, as a ghost or otherwise.  
Aradia: The psychic powers which might tip people off that she’s back line up perfectly with the psychic powers that kept her from controlling people to begin with, so…

* * *

**0k kids: I'm sure you all had the occasional nightmare about what life would be like after conscription, now that it's happened, what do you have nightmares about?**

Aradia: Daymares tend to ease up a lot after you’re off-planet, actually!  
Aradia: Most people can usually sleep without sopor without waking up screaming, most days.

Karkat: I don’t think I’ve had a single daymare here! Oh wait. I’m dead. Do ghosts get daymares?

Skeleton: Not like live trolls do.

Aradia: So that’s the ghosts.  
Aradia: My worst recurring daymare hasn’t changed in sweeps. The set dressing changes, but at its core it’s the same.  
Aradia: I’m watching terrible things happening to everyone, and not only can I not do anything, I don’t care. I don’t care at all.

Tavros: …  
Tavros: Killing lusii.  
Tavros: Sometimes it turns into killing lusii I know.  
Tavros: But if any of my coworkers ask, it’s bad dreams about cleaning up after a barbarrister party.

Sollux: I don’t think I’m dreaming properly. Everything’s too regulated and artificial. Not that I anticipate anything good from dreams.  
Sollux: …There was one time when something went weird and I woke up thinking the ship was literally eating me.  
Sollux: But I had something pretty damn close to that back on Alternia.

Nepeta: Space and spaceships.  
Nepeta: I’m running through a cold metal tube with nothing at all outside it and I can’t get out, and it goes on forever.  
Nepeta: …Know exactly where THAT came from.

Kanaya: Nothing new until this… haunting started.

Terezi: …Inquisitorment.  
Terezi: Either it’s happening to me, or I have to do it to someone I care about.

Equius: …  
Equius: I would prefer not to say.

Eridan: Being alone. But that’s not new.

* * *

**So a lot of relationships in 0k seem to have a highblood carrying around a lowerblood who kinda resents them for it. I wanna know if Nepeta resents Equius at all for getting her assigned to a ship instead of her getting the chance to be on a planet.**

_(Really? I know the MMP is kind of a resentment factory, but that’s inherent in the setup, and some of them are still fine.)_

Nepeta: …  
Nepeta: …  
Nepeta: I don’t know.  
Nepeta: He… sort of asked me first? But it wasn’t really a question.  
Nepeta: I don’t know if I’d be happy on a planet fighting aliens either, with no friends around.  
Nepeta: I’m… I was put out. To be in security. Because it’s not… a natural place for me.  
Nepeta: Now… I’m not sorry I’m here. It turned out for the best.  
Nepeta: But it was still kind of annoying. 

* * *

**0k Equius: Are you acting like a scaredy cat in the daymare post because the answer is overbear?**

**Equius: …  
** Equius: It would be extremely… inappropriate for me to have daymares about Overbear.  
Equius: Why should *I* have daymares?  
Equius: Through the fast action of my comrades I was spared any serious or prolonged contact with him.  
Equius: And there are so many people, dead and even some alive, who went through so much worse. 

_(Which is to say, totally Overbear.)_

* * *

**Do jadebloods still have to contribute during drone season since they're still on Alternia and they are rare and genetically important, or is it the exact opposite because they have to put in extra effort to keep the caverns in order during that time?**

**Perses: It IS a busy time, and we ARE genetically valuable.  
** Perses: There’s a ~lottery~.  
Perses: Happily you’re allowed to give your, uh, lucky chance away if you want, but it has to be to someone of comparable color to you. 

* * *

**Question to jadebloods, if some recessive genes or whatever lead to a limeblood showing up in the new brood...which among you would be most likely to fudge with records to list it as a olive?**

Perses: Maltha wouldn’t. Maltha is all about following cull procedures and producing the optimal result for the global troll gene pool blah blah etcetera blah.  
Perses: I… wouldn’t stick my neck out for any particular wiggler, I don’t think. It’s a grub. Thousands of grubs die. You can’t get… hung up on that sort of thing. I can’t, anyway.  
Perses: I also wouldn’t go out of my way to make a fuss and say something’s a limeblood. That kind of classification can get subjective. 

Surewait: Technically, the only type of wiggler which is *definitively* a limeblood is a “perfect” limeblood. Anything not a “perfect” limeblood can in theory be accepted by a mustard or olive lusus, depending on which side of the line it is.  
Surewait: Some people choose to err on the side of caution and just cull anything which looks as if it could be a limeblood. I do not.  
Surewait: It’s never a perfect limeblood.  
Surewait: …I’m not sure what I would do if I ever found a real perfect limeblood. Obviously I believe they *shouldn’t* be culled just for their blood color. Considering my personal history with a wiggler of a far more forbidden blood color, I’d feel like the worst sort of hypocrite if I did anything of the kind.  
Surewait: At the same time, Reshki is correct that grubs die all the time. They’re supposed to, it’s natural, it happens with no one interfering. Treat them as people and you’ll go mad. And as far as I know there are no secret limeblood lusii.  
Surewait: Not that that stopped the Dolorosa.  
Surewait: I suppose I know what I should do, from a religious perspective. I’m not sure I could do it. 

* * *

**So Jadebloods make sure the lusii population are diverse and healthy right? How do they handle the seadwelling lusii? Since they themselves don't breath underwater. Are there jadebloods that go down in subs?**

Ashtar: Yes! Not every sweep – there hasn’t been one since I got here – but there is a submarine survey that goes out. It sounds very different and exciting!  
Ashtar: But everyone’s already told me I can’t go. :(  
Chidan: You have a flamethrower and you blow things up for fun.  
Chidan: Of course no one’s going to let you in a deepship.  
Ashtar: I wouldn’t blow up anything important!  
Chidan: … 

* * *

**Dear Jadebloods: A lot of lusii seem really dangerous and strong, how do you go about checking on their populations? (Also, do any of you have any favorite types of lusii to interact with? Adorable fairybulls? Critical Whales? Rampaging stampedes of hoofbeasts/musclebeasts?)**

Oncetold: …Well, there is a reason they usually LET Ashtar bring the flamethrower.  
Oncetold: I understand – it isn’t my job, but I do supervise novitiates whose job it is – I understand doing a lot of the work in the day also helps. It increases the risk of having to fight off undead at the same time, but many of the lusii are sheltering for the day and not inclined to pursue.  
Oncetold: But yes, there’s occasionally some bitter complaining about jades pretty much never being zoopaths. 

Ashtar: Fairy bulls are toxic levels of cute, so Chidan hates them.  
Chidan: I do not. I find them unexciting, though at least they’re easy to work with.  
Chidan: I like the larger mammalians better.  
Chidan: Ashtar likes anything that flies, despite how much harder that makes things.  
Ashtar: …Okay, true.  
Ashtar: Musclebeasts will frequently actively cooperate with a survey, so a lot of people like them.  
Ashtar: NOBODY likes dealing with the immobile types. 

* * *

**Sorry for more Jadeblood questions but, what kind of mutations are immediatly cull worthy, and what kind do you let pass? like psiionics can pass, mutant strength can pass, what about wings or idk a seadweller with below purple blood? Do highbloods get more of a pass for minor mutations than lowbloods do?**

Perses: Okay, so, there are a lot of different factors coming into play here.  
Perses: The only wigglers we are absolutely supposed to cull are limebloods and out-of-spectrum mutations – that bright red thing, most importantly.  
Perses: Any other wiggler is okay to go into the Trials. If it’s unacceptably weak, presumably it won’t make it out.  
Perses: It gets more complicated because some people LIKE culling, and also there are quotas.  
Perses: There need to be enough surviving new adults to meet the Fleet’s needs despite how dangerous it is out there, and that means you need to output enough wigglers from the caverns, and of the right colors.  
Perses: If you’re cutting down to meet a quota – if there were too many seadwellers last week so you can’t have more than four this week, or something – then PROPERLY you should do it AFTER the trials, so only the most fit wigglers have a chance. People don’t, always.  
Perses: And you are more likely to go over quota on highbloods and seadwellers. They have a smaller rate of attrition as juveniles.  
Perses: As long as you’re meeting quotas, there are no restrictions on what you can do to a grub. Cull them because you had a fight with your auspistice.  
Perses: There are a few exceptions which we are NOT supposed to cull ever, and in fact we skip them past the Trials.  
Perses: Which is also what we do when we’re below quota on something.  
Perses: Anyway, rule from on high is never cull a helmsman-grade psionic – which in this case means a wiggler you can detect any psionics in – or a perfect jade.  
Perses: Heiresses we’re not supposed to cull or hinder. Strictly hands off.  
Kebela: The perfect jadeblood thing is probably because they’ve spent the last hundred sweeps praying that one of them will get a virgin mother grub lusus and then a Matriorb.

* * *

Some one jade blood: how do you catch the lusi that eat trolls? 

Chidan: We don’t necessarily have to catch them, often, just herd them.  
Ashtar: *hefts flamethrower excitedly*  
Ashtar: Uh, the thing with all the spiders was an accident, though. MOST webs aren’t that flammable.  
Chidan: …  
Chidan: Not much of a loss, there.  
Chidan: Anyway, I’m told most lusii who eat trolls aren’t completely mindless about it. Like, they can tell the difference between a convenient easy snack and a group of well-armed adults. 

* * *

**0k jadebloods: So why don't some of you less perfect jades just make a ranch where you can breed lusii specifically for the Empresses lusus to eat?**

Ashtar: That question has been asked! In fact there’s a list about it stuck on the wall.  
Chidan: Let me think, what are the reasons.  
Chidan: One, that’s not our job.  
Chidan: Two, there’s a good chance we’d die if we went near it.  
Chidan: Three, there’s something about… avoiding spiritual cross-contamination.  
Ashtar: Wouldn’t want to get horrorterror cooties in the brooding caverns.  
Chidan: …  
Chidan: Four, it’s possible that the… the… that the Empress’s lusus actually derives nutrition from the deaths of bonded lusii specifically.  
Chidan: They could hunt unattached lusii for it as it is. They don’t.  
Chidan: Fortunately since there is no Heiress now it will have gone back into the deepest parts of the ocean where no one needs to feed it. 

* * *

**0k jades: You guys collect all the grubs that go in trolls food, right? How do you ship that around planet?**

__Perses: Not all food grubs are THAT kind of grub.  
Perses: I think only a few of them are, proportionally.  
Perses: …Delivery is done by drones, I don’t know much more than that. 

* * *

**Question to cult members among the Jades. Obviously the signless and his friends are important members of the religion, but are there any other ones that popped up over the last years? A troll who found the disciples cave writings and spread it among trolls? A troll who tried publicly to fight the mandatory forgetting of the signless? Or even bad members of the religion, like say a pirate who enslaved the Dolorosa...**

Vigilant: Well, let’s see. The Scribist copied the Disciple’s writings. We don’t know anything else about the Scribist – there may have been more than one Scribist – but she or he is sometimes mentioned.  
Oncetold: There’s the Summoner, of course. He’s… controversial.  
Surewait: The Reuniter made peace between the two major factions of the cult in the caverns. Discussions of her frequently bring up the Endmaker and the Hopehold, but I’m pretty sure those are both… composite figures.  
Oncetold: The – fair warning, this is a ridiculous name – the Crabfter completed the red-blooded lusus strain.  
Vigilant: …What was that about a pirate? 

* * *

**0k Terezi, Equius, and Eridan, are there any available/suggested/mandatory violent acts for highbloods to keep their rage levels down? I don't mean like to prove their mettle but like, to keep them from say punching a robot into the middle of the ship so hard it explodes. Anything like that?**

Equius: There are reinforced exercise facilities that are not easily destroyed.  
Equius: Beyond that… I do not believe so. 

Sharpeye: It’s actually really hard on a lot of the high blues and purples.  
Sharpeye: They’ve been told all their lives that they’re UNSTOPPABLE RAGE MACHINES and everyone should get out of their way or deserve the consequences, and now suddenly here they are, expected to control it. Don’t rage at your commanders – unless they’re one of the commanders who liked that – but even with them there are definite wrong times for it. Take your aggression out on a lowblood! Just be careful it’s not a lowblood doing something important, or who has friends stronger than you. Break something! But if it’s important enough, you won’t get away with it.  
Sharpeye: They have to learn impulse control really fast. If they get high-ranked enough they can go back to indulging their whims, but they have to toe the line until then.  
Sharpeye: It probably accounts for at least half the attrition rate for highblood conscripts. 

* * *

**To the cultists: Does Mindfang ever show up in any texts of your religion? Either as the killer of the dolorosa, someone who saved the e%ecutor of the signless, or at least as the matesprit of the summoner?**

Oncetold: I can’t say I know anything about the Summoner’s quadrants. And it’s known the E%ecutor was remorseful, and was exiled for it, but I don’t remember anything about his being saved.  
Vigilant: The Dolorosa’s killer? In the agreed-upon history, we don’t have any idea what happened to the Dolorosa after she was enslaved to seadwellers.  
Vigilant: There is… um… there is…  
Oncetold: There’s the “Dolorosa Apocrypha”, which tells of how she crawled out of the sea as a rainbow drinker and had all sorts of hair-raising adventures across the planet, but that’s, well, apocryphal.  
Vigilant: Also a little embarrassing.  
Oncetold: I think they’re fun. Mostly unbelievable, but fun.  
Oncetold: In the “Apocrypha”, when she’s asked how she came to be a rainbow drinker – which is equivalent to who killed her, I think? She says that she will not say anything about anyone who was directly or indirectly responsible, because she didn’t feel forgiving, and to be utterly forgotten is the worst fate the people responsible could imagine. 

_[Maybe the Dolorosa Apocrypha is true; or maybe it was written by long-ago jadeblood cultists who HAD heard about Mindfang and Dualscar, and who decided very deliberately not to allow them in the legend. Because they’d like being in the legend even as villains. Forget them.]_

* * *

**Did Terezi & Vriska ever end up in a quadrant when they were on Alternia? Have they even interacted much since Vriska died? If so, what have their interactions been like? Terezi seemed so happy that Vriska was joining them on the ship, even if she was dead...**

Vriska : Uhhhhhhhh, we tried a couple out.  
Terezi: Pale, pitch, then Nepeta was auspisticizing us for about a week–  
Vriska: Zahhak begged her to.  
Terezi: –Then pale again, then after that didn’t work SOMEBODY decided we might be FLUSHED–  
Vriska: Yeah, I was wrong, but the shitfit Karkat threw about it was HILARIOUS.  
Terezi: …We tried all of them out, I guess.  
Terezi: We can’t be pale because we don’t actually listen to each other about our own problems, we can’t be pitch because we take it too far, we get too pissed off to be flush, and no one would actually want to be our middle leaf.  
Terezi: We gave up and decided not everything has to be a quadrant.  
Vriska: We’re sisters!  
Terezi: …And sisters are sisters, even if they don’t talk for a while when one of them is being particularly intolerable.  
Vriska: Back at you. 

Vriska: I haven’t spent any time on Terezi’s ship because of that thing with the helmsman being irked about the trial.  
Terezi: And we’re in pretty close quarters most of the time. Even if we do bring Skaree in enough to tell her about the ghosts, I don’t think she and Vriska would get along well.  
Terezi: And apart from my respiteblock, most of my time out of public sight is with Tavros…  
Vriska: Who I’m still not allowed to talk to.  
Terezi: We message a lot. I have many helpful suggestions for GARPing!  
Vriska: She didn’t do a damn thing to help talk down Karkat the rogue NPC, though. Just sent lines and lines of H4H4H4H4H4H4H4H4.  
Terezi: >:] 

* * *

**Could Aradia theoretically have alien ghosts in her ghost army, and would she even want to? Is it possible that there are alien ghosts (aside from the "gestalt" ghost) which the troll necropaths couldn't control?**

Aradia: Ummm, I don’t know. If I found one that was interested, maybe? 

Bonebelt: My understanding is that some alien ghosts are strong enough that they are extremely difficult to control, but if they are flatly impossible to control – if they are on that much of a different wavelength – then they probably can’t do any serious haunting. 


	235. ==> BE GAMZEE [connecting]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0K: Gamzee and Cephal, how did you two get started as a musical duet?

==> BE GAMZEE

Your favorite audience finishes checking her loaner bunk on the Magnificent Marine Predation for anything she’s forgotten to pack. There isn’t anything. It probably helps that she barely unpacked. “Glad to be out of HERE,” she mutters to herself.

Then she looks around the block – looking right through you, of course – and says, “Hey, guitar ghost. Thanks again for the moral support. If you’re ever around the Enthusiastic Violence, stop by – I play xylophone, no one will ever practice with me!”

…You think you just may do that.


	236. ==> BE AMIETY AMMETE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: did Overbear ever go after someone's lusus?

==> BE AMIETY AMMETE

You’re Panthe’s matesprit, not his moirail, and you both know you have enough on your plate as a lowblood without his issues, so you found it concerning but not overly so when you could tell he was worried about something he wasn’t saying. The Fleet is stressful. Shit happens. Not as much as Aurich says it does, but it still happens.

So the first you hear about Colonel Overbear is when Panthe trolls you “he killed my lusus we have to break up”. He spills the whole awful story when you push him.

You don’t let him put in the paperwork to dissolve the quadrant, because there’s been a strange ruffiannihilator hanging around lately – you have a feeling it’s already too late.


	237. ==> BE NEPETA [during Conscription]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Past 0k Gamzee and Nepeta: Cry together as you get carried home by a barf covered indigo

==> BE NEPETA

You want to go home. You want your lusus. But you can’t go home ever again, and you can’t have your lusus, and your moirail seems to have frozen up. (Distantly, you wonder whether it’s because of what – what – what happened to Karkat, or because of Gamzee… leaning on him.)

“Nepeta. Nepeta, come on.” Someone tugs on your shoulder. “I’m not happy either but you need to get it together.” Terezi’s expression is… maybe the most painfully fake smile you’ve ever seen. “Come on, let’s hit the midblood camp and clean up.”

“Equius–”

“Vriska’s going to walk him back, he’ll snap out of it if she tries anything obnoxious.” Terezi steers you away as you choke on tears. “Hopefully Eridan deals with Gamzee okay…”


	238. ==> BE ANCILLAR ALLCOLOR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Who is the oldest jadeblood?

==> BE ANCILLAR ALLCOLOR

As far as you know, you’re at least a hundred sweeps older than any other living (or semi-living!) jadeblood. You are pretty sure it’s because not only are you a rainbow drinker, you became a rainbow drinker YOUNG. You’re aging more slowly, from a younger starting point. It did stunt your growth, though, which is a shame. Although that might be a contributing factor as well…

Whatever the real cause is, whenever someone mentions your longevity you TELL them it’s because of the health benefits of your position as slurry intake supervisor.


	239. ==> BE ASHTAR ROTHAH

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Jadeblood who just got hit by an undead: What are your thoughts on the current situation?

==> BE ASHTAR ROTHAH

It was pure reflex to fire the flamethrower when you realized the thing was heading for you – you didn’t realize until a LITTLE too late that this would result in it ON FIRE and heading for you. Fortunately they always have some people with fire extinguishers, on your trips. Still, ouch.

When you’re all put out and brushed off and not getting a safety lecture for once, you look around at your fellow novices. “Did… anyone else hear something about… conquering the universe?”

Chidan scoffs, but Phrodi, one of the rookies, blanches. “I… thought I was hearing things.”

You nod understandingly. “I thought I was hearing things for a few weeks, until I decided to give it up and believe in ghosts. One of the perfects in our brood died in the first Incident, and now I think our dormmate’s desk is haunted…”


	240. ==> BE KARKAT [post-action]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Vriska + Karkat: Stop the <3< Rampage on the Marine Predation

==> BE KARKAT

You and Vriska stand by as someone finally arrives with a fire suppressant to put out the… body. Eridan’s blackcrush is INSANE. You are so glad ghosts can’t usually smell anything.

Vriska cringes. “CC is REALLY unhappy about the motor oil,” she says. “Uh… not sure how much relaying she’s doing right now.”

“Huh.” The other seadwellers don’t seem very happy about the motor oil, either. 

“So… we won, right? We beat them?”

Well, Vriska beat one of them, only after some idiot got himself killed, and then Eridan’s blackcrush – whom you can’t say you approve of – beat the other, but… close enough. “Guess so.”

“All RIGHT! We are the GREATEST!” She throws an arm around your shoulders. “Team saving seadwellers’ fishy ASSES!”

You don’t think that’s a very good name for a team.


	241. ==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: Turtur: find out that the helmsblock you're now working in used to be full of ghosts that liked to punch technicians in the groin.

==> BE TURTUR PACHEX

You would kind of like to ask Cannis what she knows about the ghost situation on the Unrelenting Persecution. You are sure she knows something. But you don’t want to risk the wrong people hearing about it.

…You aren’t sure who “the wrong people” would even BE in this circumstance, but. You’re sure there’s someone who shouldn’t hear about it.

As much as you feel like any ghosts of former helmsmen have the moral right to punch the crew in the groin – especially this late helmsman and this crew – you would rather avoid getting punched yourself. Happily you don’t NEED to spend much time there in person to do the analyses – and fake the analyses – you need to do. You still drop by once a week, though, to make sure you don’t forget the real effects of what you’re doing. You haven’t been targeted yet. It seems to be mostly Essevi and Arthro.


	242. ==> BE EQUIUS ZAHHAK [exercising restraint]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k Equius: No moirail around and no killbot barehanded cage brawls. How are you keeping your temper in check at all?

==> BE EQUIUS ZAHHAK

You consider yourself fortunate that Nepeta was around for the first weeks after Conscription, as you came to understand that you were surrounded by people who were often your equal or superior in blood, and almost uniformly your superior in rank, and all of them expected you not to break anything on purpose. EVER. Some accidents were allowed, high blue strength is what it is, but no “tantrums” as one of your instructors put it.

You didn’t understand. You thought this was just how bluebloods WERE. But orders were orders, so you clenched your fists and broke more of your teeth and sweated, and later on Nepeta held you while you shook with everything you’d held in.

But you’ve learned. It’s getting easier, now, to just sort of – slide your temper aside rather than lash out or wall in. You’re still sweating a lot, though.


	243. ==> BE PAST MALTHA TAMMAS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Maltha: Hangout on the same RIGHT and PROPER online forums as Equius

==> BE PAST MALTHA TAMMAS

You stare incredulously at the message. Banned? How could you be banned? All you did was point out the contributions of non-highbloods could be equally or more important to troll society as a whole, which should be BLATANTLY OBVIOUS to anyone who thinks about reproduction for FIVE SECONDS. And they BANNED you?


	244. ==> BE PAST BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: Hey Briate, how did you meet Sennet and Sessor? And how'd you convince them to let you be their middle leaf- and that they needed one at all?

==> BE PAST BRIATE MEDLAI

When the smoke has cleared and the dust has settled on the remains of the Dark Season In-Person FLARP Regional Open, you find yourself looking for the pair that started the bloodbath. You’re not quite sure why. You’re not even sure they’re alive, between the psionic meltdown and the bombs.

They are. Also awake, and arguing, and leaning in with burning eyes.

They’re going to do this again. And next time it might not be at a FLARP tournament, where people at least nominally knew what they were getting into. And they live near you.

You MIGHT be able to take one of them out, but the other one would get you for sure. And you just… you don’t want to kill them, somehow, you want to fix this?

So instead of attacking, you jump down and stride right up to them, projecting **presence** as hard as you can. They turn to look at you, startled – maybe they’ve never experienced even shitty chucklevoodoos before – and you drop a hand on each of their shoulders.

“I think what you two need is an auspistice…”


	245. Q&A VII

**0k: is the helmsman on the MMP doing any better?**

Cephal: All the crossed wires and engineering fuckups have been repositioned or un-fucked-up or otherwise corrected.  
Cephal: He shouldn’t be in any more pain, at least.  
Cephal: Mentally… mentally, I don’t know.  
Cephal: I’m not getting my hopes up.

* * *

**0k question to the jadebloods: Do any of you that make trips outside hoard rocks? Just see a good rock and it comes right home with you and also a dozen others?**

Oncetold: Rocks are allowable. Live animals not intended to be eaten by one’s lusus in the IMMEDIATE future are not.

* * *

**0k lowbloods/midbloods who have dated/are dating higher up in the spectrum: Are there any advantages? It seems like most of the time you're getting the short end of the stick with this stuff.**

Hellas: I think most people would say it’s the other way around. The highblood has most of the power, but the lowblood stands to gain the most.   
Jorjel: Hey, some people might not like the security guard thing but I am not complaining. It’s steady work, it’s not too hard, the living conditions are better than I could count on elsewhere–  
Nepeta: I will grant the food is better.   
Skaree: Mustel’s terrible taste aside, if I really needed something I couldn’t afford on my stipend…  
Frieas: If you have a highblood quadrant you get better medical care, you get a note on your file so people above you but below them know not to fuck with you for fun, you get preference for better positions, and you get all the swag you can wheedle out of them.   
Frieas: Almost worth having to put up with a highblood…  
Frieas: …Totally worth it if I could find a good target.

* * *

**"Totally worth it if I could find a good target." So frieas, what would be a good target, by your standards? And what quadrant would you be willing to put up with a highblood in?**

Frieas: Obviously pale!  
Frieas: I am the Great Pacificator!  
Panthe: …  
Tavros: …  
Frieas: Somewhere in the blueblood range would be perfect, I think. I can’t stand clowns and I don’t like the smell of fish.   
Frieas: Can’t be a midblue psychic, though. They’re too pushy and intrusive. And psychO, a lot of the time.  
Tavros: …  
Panthe: …  
Frieas: Someone not too violent – that shit’s dangerous – but volatile and going to bits and desperate for a stable influence.   
Frieas: Mmmmm.  
Takedown: He is seriously going to get killed by a blueblood who hears him talking, one of these days.

* * *

**0k: How do quadrants work if the people involved are on different ships? Do they ever get time to see each other in person?**

Sharpeye: You can apply for a quadrant pass to visit. They don’t usually give them to trainees, but after that, as long as it’s a registered quadrant, anyone can apply. Even if they’re both lowbloods! Quadrants with highbloods are much more likely to get passes QUICKLY, though.

* * *

**0k tavros: Get special treatment as either the ship doctors or equius specially visit to fix a broken robo-leg. Rest of lowblood maintenance: comment on special treatment.**

Takedown: He was already getting special treatment as the medicullers’ lusus-control resource. When it comes to medical care, that’s worth even more than a tealblood moirail.   
Frieas: I don’t think he even knows what to do with a moirail.

* * *

**For the still surviving 0k kids...how often do you catch yourselves and censor what you say? I'm assuming it's just not possible anymore for Nepeta to say blood color doesn't matter, or Aradia to call bluebloods snobs, or Equius to call a reprehensible disgrace (Do the jadebloods care if you talk caste shit? Or only about the mommagrub?). Outside of Sollux maintained chats how often do you all just keep quiet to keep from saying something bad that could end up on ship cameras?**

Aradia: Not as much as you might think, actually!  
Aradia: Some things are offenses against the Empire, and those we think really might be constantly monitored for by automated systems – that’s why we’re so careful to avoid CG and CC’s names.   
Aradia: But anything below that, it’s mostly a ship-by-ship basis. Some ships will have programs or people checking all the logs for anything untoward, some won’t.   
Sollux: Sometimes they have the helmsman work on that. Not here, though. Unrelenting Persecution continues to be lax overall.   
Aradia: So mostly it varies depending on who can actually hear you, and who you are.   
Aradia: Necropaths get a lot of latitude. Also the surveillance around us sometimes goes out randomly. Unavoidable ghostly vibrations, you know. So I really shouldn’t say bluebloods are snobs TO A BLUEBLOOD, or in a formal setting or to a superior officer, but I could say it to Bonebelt and no one would care.   
Nepeta: We have to meet more standards than the necropaths, but we’re not IMPORTANT. We have to follow orders, not… be ideologically pure. So I could tell Jorjel that blood doesn’t matter.   
Nepeta: I could say it in the recreationblock and not get in official trouble, though there’d probably be a fight, and then I might be in trouble.   
Tavros: No one cares what maintenance staff thinks. As long as we do what we’re told, are subservient to highbloods we interact with, and don’t commit those imperial offenses, we can say all sorts of things about bluebloods or highbloods or seadwellers.  
Tavros: In the cavalreapers, though – in the cavalreapers you had to watch yourself all the time.  
Terezi: Legislacerators might not be as closely watched as cavalreapers, but we have to meet standards, too.   
Terezi: No subversive or insubordinate talk will be tolerated.   
Terezi: Usually.   
Equius: I believe we are also more closely observed than lowbloods with comparable support positions.   
Equius: However, this does not mean that no one may ever criticize those higher on the spectrum.   
Eridan: I think it’s pretty clear by now that I’M watching my mouth.

* * *

**What's the blood range for medicullers? They seem like they're higher up.**

Tavros: Most of the medicullers themselves are teal through indigo.  
Tavros: There are a few purples, but not many – they tend to be GOOD ones, though, because they wouldn’t go into it if they weren’t sincerely interested, they have other, better opportunities.  
Tavros: I assume there are seadwellers somewhere, who probably only treat seadwellers.  
Tavros: Mediculling aides and technicians are mostly olive, some mustard.  
Tavros: I’ve heard that occasionally a VERY gifted olive might make full mediculler, if their superiors are really impressed, but no one seems to know any real examples.

* * *

**Friaes: Learn that the moirails of bluebloods you comment on/hit on can be just as dangerous as the bluebloods themselves.**

Takedown: …He’s a douchebag, not suicidal.   
Takedown: He follows the rules in public and goes off on his creepy little spiels when it’s lowbloods-only.

Panthe: He's had a few pale flings with bluebloods, but he's a lot more talk than action.   
Panthe: He HAS gotten smacked down a couple times I know of by other quadrants or friends of people he was… pale-objectifying?  
Panthe: Amiety, for one.

* * *

**So we know terezi has been trying to avoid cahooting..but are equius and eridan able to avoid it? I figure the higher blooded you are the more necessary cahoots are.**

Terezi: Mostly I was trying to avoid cahoots with Skaree in particular.   
Terezi: You can see how well THAT went.   
Eridan: Bluebloods are the most… cahootsy caste. Conniving, neurotic backstabbers.  
Eridan: …No offense.   
Equius: I was untouchable while Colonel Overbear was… around.  
Equius: I will pursue temporary alliances as necessary.

* * *

**question for the cerulean called Razortoe mentioned in 'Share fascin8ing theories' , what..what exactly is your job?**

Razortoe: Morale specialist.

* * *

**O Bucket Face, Bucket Face, wherefore art thou Bucket Face?**

Emijak “Bucket Face” Arthro: FUCK YOU.

Sollux: Search FleetTube for “midblood comes to medicullers with head stuck in pail after attempting solo concupiscent activity on top of a poorly stabilized television”.

* * *

**0k tavros, what are the autoculling prevention rules?**

Tavros: The rules that say you can’t do stupid things that would get large numbers of people on the ship killed, even if they’re lower-blooded than you.  
Tavros: Like, you can’t suddenly vent a segment into space. Even if you’re indigo and everyone in it is a rustblood.  
Tavros: And you can’t do anything that would lead to a segment venting into space.

Sollux: Basically it’s the “blood caste is no excuse to break the fucking ship, what part of ‘terrifying void of space beside which all trollkind is insignificant’ did you not understand” rules.

* * *

**0k: Jades/Kanaya, what's the average amount of time between someone contributing their obligatory buckets before Conscription and the resulting grub growing up and getting conscripted? Also, what does the mother grub eat?**

Oncetold: Okay, this isn’t at all my field, happily, but I do have to explain it to the novices.   
Oncetold: Grubs are not generally the definitive product of a single batch of slurry.   
Oncetold: The Mother Grub processes things in a more… complex way. She doesn’t use up everything at once.   
Oncetold: A brood might be the result of combining half the latest batch of slurry, a quarter of the one before that, an eighth of the one before that, a sixteenth of the one before that…  
Oncetold: Anyway, it’s complicated.

Vigilant: The Mother Grub eats some invertebrates and some prepared jelly.

* * *

**So 0k question for the trolls, everyone gets recruited to the fleet right? So every butcher, baker, doctor and pornographer in any professional capacity does so for the fleet? Were any of you guys afraid of getting assigned something out of left field, like professional back up dancer, or the troll will smiths personal assistant?**

Nepeta: I was a little worried they might put Equius somewhere weird.   
Eridan: Makara ALMOST got snagged by a propagandartist who wanted to use him to make a movie about the dangers of drug overuse, but the guy wasn’t high enough to overrule Gamzee’s saying no.  
Eridan: …I maybe shouldn’t have interrupted. He’d probably still be alive.

* * *

**Can lowbloods actually exact the autoculling prevention rules? Or do they have to get a superior officer to do it? (Like say tavros saw an indigo about to do said illegal venting and tackled them to stop them, would that be allowed or would he get culled for it?)**

Tavros: Guidelines are, if they’re over teal, you report it up.   
Tavros: Unless it’s IMMINENT danger, when things will definitely go bad right away if you don’t act.   
Tavros: You’re not… guaranteed to get out of it okay.   
Tavros: But superior officers can cite autoculling prevention rules to exculpate people from what would otherwise be executable insubordination or mutiny, if they choose to.   
Tavros: Ruthless Regulation tends to favor the rules, so it would be a better bet here than some places.

* * *

**So how many people are in the terrifying ghost army now?**

Aradia: Twenty-six!  
Aradia: 0u0

Bonebelt: …

_(Karkat, Feferi, Gamzee, Perlen Nerrit, Caterpillar, Panthe Silber, Alesse Dalyce, Camieo Bruice, Chidro Arctif, Cerull Nuflin, Hellas Essyet, Doriti Holdas, Olrena Pitwel, eight more Overbear-related ghosts, Vriska, Erithe Probos, Niobie Gilyan, Ashstead, and Hesten Boetia.)_

* * *

**Just curious Gamzee, how come you haven't gone on to meet the mirthful messiahs or get in line for the dark carnival or whatever?**

Gamzee: And leave all these miracles going on here?  
Gamzee: My friends and our motherfucking ghost army?  
Gamzee: Why would I wanna do that?  
Gamzee: …and I’m not… I’m not sure if I want to join the dark carnival, anymore…

* * *

**Purple claiming to be olive, what were you getting up to?**

Ashtar: Well, I don’t know about this particular instance, but the conventional wisdom is misstating your caste one or two levels down is to avoid intimidating people, that’s fine, but three or more is to lull people into a false sense of security, and that’s suspicious.   
Ashtar: Especially if you change what you say you are to always be below whoever you’re talking to. That’s a big warning sign for “looking for victims”.  
Ashtar: Or it’s possible he was new, didn’t know the etiquette, and overdid it trying to be non-scary!  
Astar: …Or so I've heard.

* * *

**0k: Perses, who is Maltha and why does everyone hate her?**

Perses: Maltha is another above-perfect jade in our cohort, and I wouldn’t say everyone hates her.  
Perses: She’s auspisticizing for Ashtar and Chidan, for which we are all VERY grateful. Especially Ashtar.  
Perses: She’s just… She’s just weirdly into culling. I can kind of see how she thinks it’s important, but I still think it’s weird how much she likes it as a duty.  
Perses: And she’s kind of humorless.

* * *

**0k: what's up with Wireburn?**

Sollux: Wireburn wants everything to work like machinery, including helmsmen but also including subordinates.

* * *

**In the 0K-verse, are Teals and Olives considered two steps apart in caste as far as the fleet is concerned, or just one because all the Jadebloods are on Alternia?**

Terezi: …I think we’re considered two steps apart? Teals are officially high midbloods, but we’re still considered closer to cerulean than we are to olive, I think.  
Tavros: And mustard is considered closer to brown than it is to olive, even though the gap there is, uh…  
Sollux: The Caste Which Must Not Be Named? I think part of that is the lowblood-midblood gap, though.  
Nepeta: Olives are in kind of an unusual purrsition that way, especially in the Fleet. Efurryone who’s olive is DEFINITELY olive, there’s no fuzziness around the edges, beclaws anyone on the other side of the boundary wouldn’t be here, for one reason or another.  
Eridan: While we’re on the subject, ceruleans are definitely BLUEBLOODS, but not precisely HIGHBLOODS. It’s not uncommon for seadwellers to call them high midbloods, too.  
Terezi: No one below them had better say that, though.  
Equius: You are also unlikely to hear it from indigos or even most purples. Ceruleans are considered lower, obviously, but not labeled midbloods. I am not certain why.  
Aradia: Nosy necropath analysis of that situation is that it’s about the psychic power. Ceruleans are much MUCH more likely to have it than the higher blues, and the higher blues would rather keep that power in their troop rather than write it off to the midbloods. And the snobbiest purples rate high bluebloods down to the same level as ceruleans, so either way, they’re lumped together.

* * *

**To whoever in 0k would know: Are there any overbear-like situations that are simply going on because they target lowbloods instead of highbloods? (Or would no highblood politically survive taking a constant stream of lowblooded romances?)**

Sharpeye: That’s… kind of a complicated question.   
Sharpeye: What made the Overbear situation unusual is that he was targeting bluebloods and highbloods, so it was – legally – murder, once he was determined to have done it.   
Sharpeye: It is POSSIBLE for a highblood killing a lowblood to be murder, but it requires some unusual circumstances. It’s more likely to be a violation of orders – most captains have some sort of blanket ‘no culling in a way disruptive to the functioning of the ship’ order, and some get more specific.   
Sharpeye: Ruthless Regulation takes that to the extreme – killing trolls on board is a legislacerator prerogative. Period.   
Sharpeye: But there are definitely places in the squadron where a highblood could openly have a series of lowblood quadrants and then cull them, openly and legally, if they picked the place and the lowbloods correctly.   
Sharpeye: There was an indigo called Keenfang who did that on Gathering Swarm, when I was still a trainee.   
Sharpeye: The thing is, while it can be legal, it’s still generally agreed to be very, very creepy.   
Sharpeye: Pressure lowbloods into your quadrants, whatever, cull a bunch of lowbloods, no problem, but CULLING YOUR QUADRANTS – that’s not normal. There’s something wrong with a troll who does that. Outside the subjugglators they can forget about being promoted.   
Sharpeye: …Unless it’s convincingly accidental or done in a fit of rage.   
Sharpeye: So I think generally anyone who starts doing it openly either realizes what a bad impression they’re making and stops doing it openly, or doesn’t have that much sense or self-control and crashes and burns otherwise.   
Sharpeye: Or they could NOT do it openly. But even when culling a lowblood would be perfectly acceptable, killing them and covering up your involvement is usually not, so that opens them up to consequences if it ever gets proved.   
Sharpeye: There’s a cerulean called Mindpain who got demoted over something similar, maybe… ten sweeps ago? I think he’s still on the Brutal Domination.  
Sharpeye: Anyway, I don’t KNOW of anything similar happening NOW. But I wouldn’t be shocked if something came to light.

* * *

**Question to the 12 0k kids/ghosts: If you could have picked your Caste, which one would you pick?**

Aradia: No change. I’m proud of what I am.

Tavros: …Olive. If I could keep my powers. Stick with brown if it’s the only way to keep them, though.

Sollux: I can’t see myself without my psionics, and these psionics would probably put anyone in a helmscolumn at Conscription. If I could pick some high midblood thing without sacrificing the psionics I’d have had more resources to play around with on Alternia.

Karkat: Olive, preferably.

Nepeta: I’m happy as I am!

Kanaya: I can’t imagine being anything else.

Terezi: You get a good spread of options with teal.

Vriska: Uh, would being a different color get me a different lusus? I’d be willing to go down as far as olive or up to purple for that.

Equius: …PICK a caste???

Gamzee: …I dunno, maybe brown?

Eridan: This one, obviously!

Feferi: …Life would certainly be a lot SIMPLER if I were violet.

* * *

**Do lowbloods quadrented to highbloods have legal protection, or is it mostly understood that the highblood will get revenge if anything happens?**

Sharpeye: Bit of both. There’s no automatic legal protection, but killing someone which gets another highblood out for your blood is disruptive to the ship running smoothly, so for most people it’s technically against orders.

* * *

**Aradia: Do lusii ever have ghosts?**

Aradia: A few times I’ve seen things that might be lusii ghosts, but I’ve never been able to communicate with them at all.  
Aradia: I guess in theory if we had a psychic we trusted, we could try to combine my powers with Tavros’s…? Moot point, there isn’t one.  
Aradia: Maybe we’ll get more of an answer once Tavros joins the Terrifying Ghost Army!

* * *

**In ok, do jadebloods generally get to keep in contact with their lusii? At least the ones that don't work in the inner caverns?**

Ashtar: Yes! *hugs Skunkmom*  
Kebela: We do, too, although our lusii generally tend to have shorter natural lifespans – not as short as a virgin mother grub, and Antmom is still with me, but most of the older Attenders are naturally orphaned.

_(Perses–scorpion-tailed crocodile; Kebela–(giant) ant; Ashtar–(lion-sized) skunk; Chidan–ROUS; Maltha–(large but not huge) iguana; Hestai–(giant) mantis; Oncetold–condor; Vigilant–orphaned; Surewait–kangaroo)_

* * *

**Do the lusii on the ships live in the blocks with their trolls, or is there a sort of lusus garden or whatever they live in? Or does it depend on size and temperment? (If so, does that mean Eridan and Equius both get to have their dads live with them?)**

Eridan: Depends on size, temperament, and rank and therefore living quarters size of the troll. My lusus is in with me.  
Equius: Aurthour usually stays in the lususblock, as my assigned quarters are… slightly small for both of us.

* * *

**Has a certain purple on the marine preditation found a moirail yet? I'm sure some of the seadwellers there could really use one (cough Eridan cough)**

Briate: …I’d kind of like a moirail who’s trying to get me less fucked-up, not a moirail who I’m trying to get less fucked-up.

* * *

**If a seadweller tried to get a purple quadrantmate who was attempting to be a subjuglagator re-assigned, would it happen? Or do the clowns have enough control they could veto that?**

Backwing: Depends on if the trainee subjugglator has caught the attention of any of their superiors. A highly-ranked subjugglator could block a transfer requested by a low-ranking seadweller, but it wouldn’t be automatically blocked by subjugglator prestige.

* * *

**You say that Jadebloods tend to have lussi with shorter lifespans. Is there a reason for that? Is there a pattern to what kind of lussi are associated with each caste?**

Perses: Perfect jadebloods specifically tend to have giant insect lusii, and their lusii tend to have shorter lifespans.   
Perses: I never had any idea why, but maybe it’s because they’re sort of… approximating virgin mother grubs? I don’t know.

Ashtar: Let’s see… There aren’t any really hard rules, I don’t think? You’ll get all sorts of weird combinations.   
Ashtar: Buuuut… the biggest – I mean really big, there’s-no-way-that-goes-into-your-hive, can’t-be-taken-into-the-Fleet big – non-marine lusii are usually teal or cerulean.   
Ashtar: Marine lusii can get pretty big, too, obviously. And those are usually violet, but sometimes purple. Usually the purple ones at least can go on land.   
Ashtar: Usually.   
Ashtar: The lusii with… what’s the word for it… the ones like musclebeasts, that have heads that look kind of like troll heads? They’re most often blue, and they tend to be the smartest.   
Ashtar: Troll-smartest, anyway. It’s a mistake to assume any lusus is stupid.   
Ashtar: Obstinate and obnoxious, fuck yes, but don’t assume stupid.   
Ashtar: …Sometimes they do turn out to be stupid, though.   
Ashtar: Before Conscription I kind of had the idea that lowblood lusii are more likely to be gentle, less likely to be predatory? TOTALLY WRONG.

* * *

**To the jadebloods, do truly massive lusii ever attack you? Or unintentionally mess with things due to their sheer hugeness? Do beasts that big ever pick up grubs to raise or do they just breed new lusii? (I mean mega huge like the butlerbeasts on the page "Jake: Behold zoological splendor")**

Chidan: One, that’s where Rothah’s flamethrower actually comes in handy.  
Ashtar: And for undead!  
Chidan: Two, yes. So much yes.   
Ashtar: Big lusii do pick up grubs. I’m not 100% sure how with some of them, but I’m also not sure how some of the others manage it.  
Chidan: …We don’t usually see terrestrial lusii that are THAT big, though. Especially not musclebeasts – I think if they get too large to take shelter in the day the solar radiation does nasty things to them over time. That must be an unusually hospitable environment.

* * *

**0k: I'm curious, how did the Altadona and the other senior jadebloods react to finding out that Kanaya had a Matriorb?**

Vigilant: …There may or may not have been crying in relief.

* * *

**0k sollux and equius: Ruin the dropbox for everyone by getting in a boring argument about hardware and software.**

Sollux: Hey, if I wanted to do that, I could set up a private chat instead of cluttering things up more.

* * *

**Has the idea of cloning the mother grub come up at all in the caverns? (Or anywhere else?)**

Kebela: *horrified silence*  
Vigilant: *horrified silence*  
[Vast majority of other perfect jades]: *horrified silence*

Altadona: That is a sacrilegious idea and I am shocked you would propose it.  
Altadona: …There is a small workgroup of above-perfect jades which has been working on perfecting a troll cloning process for the last hundred sweeps or so. As far as they know it’s to increase the number of strong psionics.  
Altadona: They haven’t – they’ve never had a complete success. The troll metamorphosis process is such that cloning from adults is much more difficult than it is for many lusii species, for examples. Specimen development has always been abnormal, even in the ones which become apparently functional adults.  
Altadona: Nothing that would be acceptable for the… scenario in question.  
Altadona: …I had a tissue sample taken and preserved. In case the alternative to unacceptable became NOTHING.

* * *

**To the jades: Has there ever been talk of, if you could get two matriorbs at once, taking one to another planet and starting up another mother grub so trolls could start pumping out twice the population?**

Perses: …Well I guess there’s no real reason why that COULDN’T be done…?

Kebela: Sweet holy fucking shit why would you ASK something like that what is WRONG with you??!!

* * *

**So how many mother grubs come from a matriorb? One to keep breeding and a few to go off and be virgin mother grubs until they raise a troll?**

Vigilant: Most virgin mother grubs come from other virgin mother grubs, via parthenogenesis. A virgin mother grub that is not a lusus will usually spawn another virgin mother grub upon its death.  
Vigilant: The Mother Grub also, occasionally, produces virgin mother grubs.  
Vigilant: The Matriorb will produce one viable mother grub.

* * *

**0k: How long does a Mother Grub live, and how long *should* a Mother Grub live? What is the health status of the current Mother Grub like?**

_[I honestly thought I’d talked about this, but apparently not in 0k! These lines may be familiar to those who read all my Close Encounters follow-up ficlets.]_

Kebela: I don’t know what the… expectations are, exactly, but the Mother Grub is not… young.  
Kebela: She isn’t as, as strong as she once was.  
Kebela: The pressure – the spawning rate to keep up with the expansion of the Empire while maintaining cull thresholds is too high, it’s not sustainable.  
Kebela: Even if we stopped, it’s not–  
Kebela: …  
Kebela: We never talk about this, not ever, but there’s a reason they’ve been so desperate for a matriorb.

* * *

**0k: As I understand it, it'll take a while for the new Mother Grub to reach maturity. What's going to happen in the time between the old Mother Grub dying and the new Mother Grub being able to make new grubs?**

Altadona: …We’re hoping she can… can last long enough for the… the…  
Altadona: Although that brings up its own problems.

* * *

**0k: Perses and other imperfect jades, are you guys just going to have to let all the grubs through because the Mother Grub isn't making enough grubs for you guys to afford to cull any?**

Maltha: It is most irksome to have to relax standards to meet quotas.  
Perses: I’M not complaining about that.  
Maltha: To say nothing of moving grubs PAST THE TRIALS!  
Perses: …I’m complaining a little about that, it’s a pain.  
Surewait: …Now that you mention it, incoming volume has dropped a little over the course of my career…

* * *

**0k jadebloods, why is production demand so high and culling demand so high? Can't you just tell HIC that the mother grub has limits?**

Altadona: …  
Altadona: …  
Altadona: …  
Altadona: …  
Altadona: Yeah, no.

* * *

**0k: Maltha, please say you don't get off on culling grubs. There has to be some other reason why you like it so much.**

Maltha: WHAT?!  
Maltha: That’s – what – that’s FILTHY!  
Maltha: It’s RIGHT AND PROPER, that’s why I enjoy it!  
Maltha: Don’t you ever feel the satisfaction of, of tidying a block, or weeding a garden, or putting things in order?

* * *

**Maltha: Well, yeah, but generally feeling satisfaction at a job well done doesn't occur when it involved murdering tiny helpless children.**

Maltha: …  
Maltha: What is WRONG with you?

Perses: Okay, I think Maltha’s waaaay too into it, too, but that’s… not really a very good way of characterizing things.  
Perses: It’s not like she’s going out and dragging little pre-adults out of their hives and stabbing them.  
Perses: Or, you know, WE are, since it’s a whole crew at work.  
Perses: Grubs aren’t people. A lot of them die. They are supposed to die. I think it’s nasty and sort of depressing, but that’s just how it is. 

Surewait: How I justify it to myself – and to the more sensitive novices – is, do I really think a grub would be better off going into the Trials and, I don’t know, falling into a pit it’s too weak to crawl out of and starving? Or getting torn apart by grublions?  
Surewait: If there was no culling, no Trials, I don’t think there are even enough lusii for all of them. They’d die of starvation or exposure.

* * *

**0k Jadebloods: If you decided to have a signless rebellion, who could stop you? I mean the future of the entire troll species is literally in your hands**

Vigilant: A few problems with that.  
Vigilant: One, not all jadebloods are Signlessists. Under half, I’m pretty sure. And we don’t have any real organization.  
Surewait: Two, while we are positioned so that we could hold our future hostage, that only works if the person you’re facing believes you would actually carry through your threat, and most of us WOULDN’T, and I think that’s obvious.  
Oncetold: Three, honestly I’m not confident that everyone in the Empire would opt for preserving the future of the species over crushing a rebellion.

* * *

**What color are grublions and does anyone ever get them as a lusus?**

Perses: Uh, usually kind of… actually I have no idea. We mostly just see their jaws. As for being lusii, uh… Ashtar?  
Ashtar: Uh… I guess that’s… theoretically possible? More predatory things have been lusii… I could ask…  
Ashtar: I’ve just been informed that the grublion as such is the larval form of the animal, and it is actually not uncommon for the mature form to be a lusus, often of perfect jades.  
Ashtar: That’s… Is anyone else weirded out by that? I’m weirded out by that.

* * *

**0K Jades: What's the point of the Trials exactly? Is there a specific thing you're looking for, or is it just a generalized "smart and strong enough to not die"? When do grubs go through the Trials?**

Perses: Pretty soon after they hatch.  
Perses: And I don’t think there’s much of a point to it beyond being… tough enough.  
Perses: Honestly I’m not sure how much reasoning even the smartest grub is capable of at that point.

* * *

**0K Jades: Can a lusus raise more than one troll? (Not, like, at the same time of course - although is that possible?) Do lusii tend to come back for new grubs after their troll Ascends?**

Ashtar: Can they, yeah. I’m not sure how common it is. Depends on the species, I guess.  
Ashtar: …And I guess it’s POSSIBLE for a lusus to raise two trolls at once? If it wanted to?  
Ashtar: If they were hatchclones maybe?  
Ashtar: Or I know it sometimes happens when pre-adults are older and already attached that one will be orphaned and move in with a friend and the friend’s lusus… tolerates it, anyway.

* * *

**So hatchclones, Im considering are when one egg hatches two (identical?) grubs, isnt considered a mutation? Or is the chance of both of them surviving the trials so low that it hasnt really come up? Also how many of the rumors about hatchclones true, like them being able to psionically speak to each other or know when the others being harmed?**

Ashtar: Uh, mostly I’ve seen them in fiction?  
Perses: If they’re otherwise normal it’s not a mutation I don’t think.   
Perses: I don’t remember ever seeing any – I mean, I wouldn’t, necessarily, if they don’t have unusual horns all grubs of the same color kind of blur together – so I’m not certain they’re really a thing?  
Surewait: They are a, ah, thing. Very rare, though. I don’t know whether any of the folklore about them is true.

* * *

**What would happen if a perfect Jade had helmsman-grade psionics? Or does that not happen?**

Altadona: To my knowledge it has never happened, and seems very unlikely to happen, given that perfect jades generally have no psionics at all.   
Altadona: Should such an occasion arise… We’d argue to take her anyway.

Aradia: Since “necropath” can trump helmsman-grade psionics, I expect “perfect jade” could, too.

* * *

**0k: Does Kanaya's status as the Person Who Was Worthy Of Receiving A Matriorb mean that she'll be eligible for certain ranks or privileges? For instance, could she be Altadona at some point in the future?**

Altadona: It certainly means some people will be eager for her to be awarded some ranks.   
Altadona: But it would not serve her or anyone else well to award them if she is not qualified.   
Altadona: She seems a sensible child. I would not rule out the possibility of her someday becoming Altadona.  
Altadona: But she has a lot to learn before she would be anywhere near ready.   
Altadona: Perhaps my successor’s successor, if she learns well and pursues leadership positions.

Kebela: As for privileges… She’s already getting unusual treatment, but I wouldn’t call it privileges necessarily. She just has unusual duties.   
Kebela: She probably could get some more privileges if she pushed.

* * *

**would a male perfect jade be considered a mutation and culled? if not, would he still be recruited to the caverns, and would he have all the duties and privileges of a female perfect jade? what about a male tyrian?**

Hestai Fialle: Uh, that’s me!  
Hestai Fialle: I’m the one with the haunted desk, who went with Ashtar to get her backup flamethrower?  
Hestai Fialle: So, um, as you can see, not culled, but also not in the Inner Caverns.  
Hestai Fialle: Males only get categorized as jadeblood if they’re EXACTLY JADE – any male with Ashtar’s blood color would be labeled olive, or Perses’s would be teal – because jadebloods are ~supposed~ to be female.  
Hestai Fialle: There are still more female perfect jades than male perfect jades. I guess they really are supposed to be female, sort of.  
Hestai Fialle: Anyway, even though I’m technically perfect, and I think SHOULD be able to do… perfect jade stuff, I don’t really get ranked as perfect? So I’m here in the Outer Caverns.  
Hestai Fialle: Efessa feels – felt really bad about it. She feels – felt like I had better perfect jade instincts than she does. Did. She would come to me for advice, or share some of the stuff they learned, sometimes…

Surewait: …A male tyrian? Um…  
Surewait: It’s never come up.  
Surewait: If it did, I think I’d leave the choice up to the tyrian lusus.

* * *

**Im curious, how bad would it have been if Kanaya was a raging hardcore casteist/hemoist? On a related topic how goes the forming of the 2nd Sufferers cult, and how does Kanaya fit into it?**

Vigilant: It would have been… annoying.  
Vigilant: But not unmanageable.  
Vigilant: As for the Second Signless, fortunately the need for discretion kept anyone from harassing Kanaya about it, even before current events distracted everyone.  
Vigilant: Philosophy on the subject is… still forming.

* * *

**looks like olive’s the winner**

Aradia: Yeah, I wouldn’t change myself, but olive’s high enough not to get stomped on all the time, but low enough there aren’t weird expectations all over the place.

* * *

**Speaking of the tyrian lusus, how exactly does the rift barnacle pick up her new pupa? What about the immobile lusui (like Terizi’s egg mom)? Or the violet ones that can’t come on land?**

Surewait: Violet grubs – and any tyrians – are let out directly into the ocean. If there’s an Heiress, the instructions are to see them into the water and evacuate inland IMMEDIATELY to avoid inadvertent psychic damage.   
Surewait: As for the immobile ones… I honestly do not know.

* * *

**So how long until Kanaya's ghost friends came to help gets transformed into Kanaya summoned the 2nd Sufferer and his ghost army to stop the evil ghosts? Also is Kanaya the de facto head priestess of his cult even if she doesn't know it (yet?)?**

Kanaya: …  
Kanaya: Help.

* * *

**0k jades: Have two tyrians ever hatched around the same time? (And do you think raising the second to be a signless follower in secret and then discreetly getting rid of the first one so yours would be heir apparent would be a good idea?)**

Oncetold: …  
Oncetold: Setting aside all of the ethical and moral issues involved in such a plan, the first one would by that time be in the care of Gl’bgolyb.  
Oncetold: Better assassins have tried and failed to overcome that guardian.  
Oncetold: Even if such a plot somehow succeeded, all it would have accomplished is to let a Signlessist Heiress die fighting the Empress.  
Surewait: And it wouldn’t come up. Tyrians are rare enough I can’t imagine there have ever been two immature ones at once.  
Oncetold: …Of course, if there ever were, raising one of them apart would be the only way that both of them could live to adulthood. Even if the instinctive-killing thing is a myth, I can’t imagine Gl’bgolyb would accept both.

* * *

**Is Gl’bgolyb the only tyrian lusus in existence? Are there any records of ones that existed before Gl’bgolyb? Or any attempts to breed any if there's ever more than one tyrian?**

Feferi: …I am about 99% sure that if there ever were any others, she ate them.  
Feferi: And if there ever are any others in the future, she’ll eat them, too.  
Feferi: I love her, but she’s a little, uhh… difficult.

* * *

**So what would have happened with the whole matriorb situation if Kanaya hadn't made it to adulthood? Would her lusus still have been able to produce one? I mean, I realize there would have been no one who knew to retrieve it, but...**

Vigilant: If I understand the theory correctly, a Matriorb is removed from the body of a virgin mother grub lusus after her natural death.  
Vigilant: That death occurs after rearing her troll for six to seven sweeps.   
Vigilant: If the troll dies before that, the virgin mother grub lusus will die of grief.  
Vigilant: Theoretically if it’s late enough, the Matriorb would already have been formed and someone else could extract it.  
Vigilant: But the bottom line is, yes, the early death of the troll of the virgin mother grub lusus would have ruined everything.  
Vigilant: I think there was a plan to surreptitiously guard the juvenile if a virgin mother grub lusus was found, but as it turned out Maryam and her lusus fell completely through the cracks.  
Vigilant: A lot of the records to do with her brood were… a little scrambled.

* * *

**What was the "abnormality" that is no longer grounds for immediate grub culling?**

Maltha: An elongated body segment with an extra pair of legs.  
Maltha: I don’t understand how they can possibly allow it.

* * *

**Hey Maltha, would a grub with the elongated body segment and an extra pair of legs pupate into a visibly mutated troll? Like, would they grow an extra pair of hands or something?**

Maltha: …  
Maltha: I don’t know.  
Surewait: These things do often disappear in pupation, either completely or to an extent that they aren’t a problem!  
Surewait: …Is what we’re saying, at least. We know that sometimes this sort of issue – not elongated segments specifically, but physical abnormality in general – resolves itself, and sometimes it doesn’t.  
Surewait: And sometimes it doesn’t resolve itself exactly but the troll is still functional enough to become a highly respected Ancillar and rainbow drinker before anyone finds out she has an entire extra set of arm joints, and it’s hard to argue with that sort of success. Especially as Ancillar Eveneyes is still around.  
Perses: It’s the sort of thing that should probably be studied, but it would probably be really upsetting, so I’m not going to suggest it.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Kebela/Perses/Surewait, can you talk us through the various jade positions and what responsibilities they have?**

Oncetold: Most basically, perfects become Attenders, and they keep the Inner Caverns running. Imperfects become Ancillars, and we keep the Outer Caverns running.   
Oncetold: Either of them can have… all sorts of duties. In theory Attenders focus on tending the Mother Grub, but anything that needs to be done in the Inner Caverns has to be done by perfects, so someone has to do maintenance work, first aid, engineering, teaching, and of course a little egg transport and slurry management. Some of that they can push off on their novices, but some of it needs experts. Oh, and perfects always deal with direct drone interaction.  
Oncetold: Ancillars have even more… peripheral work to do. Maintenance and mediculling and engineering and teaching, plus food preparation, small-scale manufacturing, computers, security – all that has to be done.  
Oncetold: Specifically jade Outer Caverns work includes dealing with eggs, grubs, lusii, and slurry. I’ll give you one guess what the least popular of those is.  
Oncetold: Dealing with grubs, especially anything involving culling, is the ‘default’ work of above-perfect jades. That’s why Perses is doing it as a novice, even though she’ll obviously be put on the computers when she’s older. Maltha’s a natural.  
Oncetold: Dealing with lusii is the ‘default’ work of below-perfect jades. There’s not as much of that, so below-perfect jades are a little more likely to be in peripheral jobs.  
Oncetold: Dealing with slurry is the default task of the small subset of people who actually don’t mind, and a rotation of unfortunates who couldn’t get out of it.

* * *

**Hey Karkat, wouldn't it be good cover if people start thinking that you're a limeblood? It'd make a good excuse as to why they made such a point of killing you, after all.**

Karkat: I’d prefer the Terrifying Ghost Army thinking I’m a limeblood to them knowing about the pain cult thing.  
Karkat: But I suspect everyone is going to find out about the FUCKING pain cult thing.

* * *

**Scrambled how?**

Surewait: There were some… complications… because of the new Heiress.   
Surewait: Not because of any other aspects of the brood that needed not to go into any reviewable databases.

* * *

**Wait. What was that about a Rainbow Drinker with an extra pair of arms??? Can she walk with them openly out? And who is Ancillar Eveneyes, and what does she have to do with it? [Sorry if youve already got multiple asks about this]**

Surewait: Ancillar Eveneyes doesn’t have an extra pair of arms, she has an extra set of JOINTS in her arms, halfway between wrist and elbow.  
Surewait: They aren’t very good joints, I don’t think. The muscles aren’t really properly adapted for them? But she just wore forearm bracers all the time to compensate for the weakness, and no one thought anything of it.  
Surewait: Then when she became a rainbow drinker, the strength boost meant she can actually use the joint now.  
Surewait: …I don’t think she uses it for anything, though.

* * *

**Surewait, what exactly happened with those complications about the new Heiress?**

Surewait: Have YOU ever had to deal with a horrorterror coming close enough inland it could have put a tentacle on shore? No?  
Surewait: Then don’t criticize.

_[Just in case it wasn’t clear, Surewait and other Signlessist jades in grub management deliberately blew the records of the entire brood to eliminate any chance of someone noticing that rather non-standard crab lusus in the pickup records. They wouldn’t have done it quite so thoroughly if they’d known someone getting a virgin mother grub lusus was more than a curiosity, but even Signlessist denizens of the Inner Caverns keep its secrets, so they didn’t. Gl'bgolyb-related chaos was an easy thing to blame.]_

* * *

**Alright Jadebloods..I'm sure you get asked this a lot. But has anyone ever accidentally fallen into the slurry?**

Oncetold: Not if they’re being careful, is what I tell the novices.

Ancillar Allcolor: Indeed they do! Usually at least once a drone season.  
Ancillar Allcolor: And people have been pushed, too.  
Ancillar Allcolor: No drownings in a very long time, though.

* * *

**question for the living among main twelve: Who is your favorite co-worker? For the ghosts: Favorite member of the ghost army?**

Aradia: Can I call Bonebelt a coworker? She’s really senior…

Tavros: Tiblee, probably? I mean, I like most of them well enough, now that they aren’t resenting me for… whatever. Except Frieas, obviously.

Sollux: …Ananas Strigi. If only she’s one of my only “coworkers” who doesn’t THINK SHE’S A SHIP.

Nepeta: Jorjel? Sort of by default… I like a lot of the others well enough, too!

Terezi: At this point I have fellow trainees, not coworkers! …Skaree. Unless I can say Sharpeye?

Equius: Naspar is skilled and professional. [Naspar is new, because Equius’s colleagues have been largely invisible.]

Eridan: …Kellep, I guess.

Karkat: Ugh, I don’t know. Am I allowed to say Gamzee or Feferi? No? Bruice or Essyet.

Vriska: Erithe. But I am NOT pale for him.

Gamzee: My guitarbro Chidro.

Feferi: Hmmm, maybe Alesse? I consider her a bit of a role model, actually.

* * *

**Hey Jadebloods, for the sake of curiosity, does the doctrine of the signless mention anything about the demoness?**

Oncetold: Not officially?  
Oncetold: But Demoness mythology is so… pervasive it’s probably inevitable it would get connected in the unofficial stuff.  
Oncetold: There’s a story about the Signless fighting her off which I think is… let’s go with HIGHLY UNLIKELY.  
Oncetold: And a whole chapter in the Dolorosa Apocrypha where the Dolorosa debates with the Demoness about the innate nature of trollkind, which is probably just as unlikely, but I find it more interesting.


	246. ==> BE PERLEN NERRIT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: Hey Perlen, how are you doing? Are you feeling any better? How did you end up getting killed by Gamzee anyway?

==> BE PERLEN NERRIT

With Caterpillar gone, you’ve been spending a lot of time with Hellas, when you’re not holed up by yourself.

“I get not wanting to deal with highbloods,” she says at one point, “but you really ought to consider talking to some of the others. They weren’t on the Gleeful Abandon, but dealing with Overbear was… pretty bad.”

“I wasn’t on the Gleeful Abandon when I was alive,” you remind her. “It’s all… ghost stuff.”

“Maybe talk to Alesse? She got dispelled.”

“…Maybe.”

(What you really want is for Makara to… to… ugh, you don’t even know. Apologize? Remember what he did to you? You’re not ready to let it go, is what you mean.)


	247. ==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k question for Naspar, tell us about yourself.

==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

You’re not brilliant. You’re smart, and you’re skilled, and you’re a very hard worker, but you’re not naturally brilliant like some of your peers in engineering. So, you often have to step in to curb various… eccentricities… before they can attract unwanted attention or otherwise cause problems.

Really that should be a job for an admin, but most admins are olive or teal and some of your peers just wouldn’t be willing to take direction from them. You’re high indigo; they mostly listen to you. It’s a weird sort of quasi-auspisticeship, but it’s working.

(You draw the line at auspisticizing between actual people, though. You’re glad someone else stepped in before Tapeer’s blackflirting got completely out of hand.)


	248. ==> BE TEREZI [attempting to go to class]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: Hey Terezi, how's it going with all your classmates competing against each other? Anyone get killed or maimed yet?

==> BE TEREZI

You raise your eyebrows at Skaree.

She shakes her head. “If I were going to attack a purple I’d finish the job,” she murmurs. “If he recovers he’s going to be PISSED. I assumed Pappad…?”

You shake your head. “Possible, but I think he was genuinely surprised when he got here, so if he was involved – it wasn’t alone.”

Whoever was involved, it wasn’t alone. It would take either more than one person or a VERY good coercive psychic to stake a purpleblood to the front teachingplane of the lectureblock through the HEAD, without killing him. …Or an adult, you suppose. This doesn’t FEEL like an adult thing, though. Maybe an older trainee?

Investerrogator Endtrack steps away from the comm, evidently finished with whatever calls he needed to make about this… situation. “All right, everyone sit down. We have a lesson to get through. Someone should be here to get Laovic down shortly, but until then, this will be good practice overcoming distractions to focus on your work.”


	249. ==> BE CATERPILLAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we see more of Chidro and Caterpillar's friendship?

==> BE CATERPILLAR

Some of the ghosts that follow the other necropaths around are getting a bit frazzled by the sudden influx of Overbear-victims with their obvious death (and pre-death) injuries, but you don’t mind. The Gleeful Abandon was a lot worse, and before you pulled yourself together you looked worse than most of them.

The wet gurgling noises the Alternia’s Got Talent guy is making are distressing, though, especially because he’s so clearly distressed. He’s trying to communicate, and he can’t, and even most of the other Overbear-victims are edging away from him, because having the whole front half of his skull destroyed is pretty gruesome even among them. (Not quite as bad as butchered-to-hell high purple guy, but he isn’t as… uh… outgoing?)

He can’t see, and you’re not really feeling up to talking today, but you’re not sure he can hear anyway. You just walk up behind him, clap a hand on his shoulder, and trace ‘HI’ on his back. He freezes.

You moved around in front of him and take his less broken hand. One letter at a time, you trace ‘IM CATERPILLAR I CANT TALK EITHER WHATS YOUR NAME’ on his palm. Then you hold his finger to your other palm, and wait.

‘IM CHIDRO THANK YOU’.


	250. ==> BE DINTEN PETHIG

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: wasn't one of Sessor or Sennet's matesprits on the MMP? How did that work out? Any conflict?

==> BE DINTEN PETHEG

You want to be angry at something. Take revenge on someone. You’d let yourself be mad at Briate if he wasn’t purple, but he is purple, so you look at it rationally and consider that he kept trying to auspisticize long after most people would have quit in disgust. You’re mad at Hesten, because he provoked Cappul to fire the rocket launcher – the first time – but he’s dead. You’re mad at Sessor, because… Because. You’re mad at the seadweller who killed Sessor, even though you’re also mad at Sessor.

There’s fuck-all you can do about any of it.

You request a transfer to somewhere you can do actual work. They give it to you.


	251. ==> BE CHIDRO ARCTIF

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we see how Chidro and Caterpillar's friendship went once he got his face back?

==> BE CHIDRO ARCTIF

Your face gets fixed somewhere between the Ruthless Regulation and the Enthusiastic Violence. It just sort of… happens. You couldn’t say how. Or even why, really, although it certainly seems to have something to do with Overbear’s… end. You feel a lot less… constrained, somehow. You clean up your clothes.

You think maybe you could fix up your guitar.

But that’s for later.

Someone taps your shoulder, and you recognize Caterpillar before she traces HI in your no-longer-broken hand – probably the receptive part of your shitty subpar chucklevoodoo-like ability. She grins and gives you a thumbs up.

You smile back. “Hey. Um…” Should you apologize, that you can talk now and she still can’t? No, that would be silly. “Want to hear me sing later? I need to warm up…”

She gives another thumbs up.


	252. ==> BE NOTTEY MICVIT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: Can we get the perspective of a Gleeful Abandon crew member who isn't a subjugglator?

==> BE NOTTEY MICVIT

You wake up at the alarm. Your recuperacoon is fine. Your barracks smells a little like blood, but not more than when you went to sleep. You’re scared.

Get up and scrape off and get dressed. That’s not much. Anyone could do that.

(Two of your blockmates are still in medical, another three have different shifts. That leaves two people getting ready alongside you. You don’t talk.)

Go to the messblock and grab something to eat. That’s not so scary. There will be lots of trolls there.

(You don’t walk with your blockmates. Three isn’t a large enough number to be safe, just large enough to attract bad attention.)

(Two of the corridors have been… repainted… since the last time you came through here. There’s a body hanging from the ceiling in one of them. The horns look… maybe familiar. The face looks… not familiar. Half familiar.)

(The grubmeal is tinted a delicate teal. You get an energy bar.)

Walk to the helmsblock. Not that far. Anyone could do it.

(Detour to avoid the screaming.)

Finally you close the helmsblock door and lean against it. “Micvit reporting for duty.”

(Made it. For another day.)

Your supervisor tosses you a packet of paci-pills. “Stop at one, we’re doing diagnostics.”

“Yes sir.” You pop the pill, and look up at the helmsman. “Sorry, Leelee, gotta interrupt your movie…”

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, I named this poor kid an anagram for NOTYET VICTIM.


	253. ==> BE EFESSA SHAMRA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: could we get the perspective of one of the ghosts from the brooding caverns?

==> BE EFESSA SHAMRA

You didn’t have very long to be terrified in the cave-in that killed you. You just had long enough to realize the CEILING had just knocked you to the floor before your head was crushed and you died instantly. You had plenty of time for horrified right after that, standing by watching while… whatever it is that causes rainbow-drinkerness tried to salvage your poor flattened body, started the heart spasming five times, and ultimately failed. (You’re really glad your head got the worst of it. Being in your body for that would have been awful.)

You were still sitting by your body, watching the last luminescent patches flicker out and the blood pool, when an older ghost grabbed you by the arm and told you that you were urgently needed to protect the Mother Grub. You just stammered out that you were on Matriorb duty, and she SHOT YOU IN THE FACE. You don’t even know what with, you just ran away un-destroying your head AGAIN.

You ran headlong into another ghost who put a ghost blanket around your shoulders and held your hands until you could stop shaking. She introduced herself as Attender Faithful and said how awful it was that you died in such a terrible way, that no one should have to suffer like that. Then she said the only way to make sure it stopped happening was to end the troll species, and would you help destroy the Matriorb and mercifully let the Mother Grub pass on? She didn’t try to stop you when you ran again, at least.

You followed a ghost who wanted you to join the defenders of the Matriorb, but when you got to the meeting place there was a fight going on, with lots of shouting about heresy, and possibly insane empresses?

That was the point you decided it would be better to leave the Inner Caverns. Hestai was your only Outer Caverns friend (because he is perfect, even though he’s male, he should be Inner Caverns), and you… somehow end up under his desk.

And then somehow you end up leading two ghosts who aren’t even jadebloods back into the Inner Caverns. Because they say they want to help. And you need so much help.


	254. ==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Naspar: Advise co-workers against putting their own aesthetic in the machinery

==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

“Rayshe, you need to redo these,” you say, wishing the day was over already. “And if you already ordered them fabricated, cancel it.”

Rayshe scowls. “They are perfectly functional and have a 4% more efficient nerve linkup–”

“Yes, and I’m sure they would be great for the odd person who WANTS a robotic arm with an extra robotic lobster claw. This is for STANDARD ISSUE.”


	255. ==> BE GATHAY CALLEA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k Equius: Start fleet robot fighting league

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> There’s an erroneous assumption in this prompt…

==> BE GATHAY CALLEA

“What is that?” Zahhak asks.

“It’s a prototype standard full-support torso sleeve,” Komlee says, sounding huffy. “Who do you think you are, Naspar?”

“…Those are robot torsos,” Zahhak says.

Uh-oh. You go to back Komlee up. “And you’re concluding that because…?” Zahhak was – understandably – thoroughly distracted by his colonel-shaped problem until recently, he shouldn’t have any idea what your hobbies are.

“I made fighting robots for sweeps, I know what a robot torso looks like,” he insists.

Well. Did he now.

Komlee is apparently thinking along similar lines. “I don’t believe you. Bet you can’t make one now.”

“Yes, I can!” he insists.

“Prove it,” Komlee challenges. Zahhak puffs up.

Rayshe is going to be so sorry he missed this. His own fault for leaving that claw around where anyone could see it, though.


	256. ==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Naspar: Return to work area to find it's turned into a robot brawl zone. Avoid lobster claw.

==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

One of your acquaintances in Maintenance calls you just as you’re about to put down the schematics and try to sleep. (You have, STRANGELY enough, a fairly good working relationship with most Maintenance trolls.) “If you’re interested in catching people in the act, you might want to visit the workblock now.”

“…Thanks.”

In the workblock, several tables have been pushed aside. Callea, Komlee, Rayshe, ZAHHAK, and a dozen others, some of whom you don’t even recognize are standing around cheering on two mostly troll-shaped robots battering the hell out of each other.

The fuck.


	257. ==> BE EQUIUS [acquiring friends???]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k: Hey Equius, how have things been going for you since Overbear died? Do you still have that stigma attached to you?

==> BE EQUIUS

Your robot loses, but only because Callea’s turns out to have a disintegration ray hidden behind its chestplate, and lets loose when it’s about to lose. It blasts a hole clear through your robot and into the ceiling.

“CALLEA!” Naspar bellows. “WHAT HAVE I TOLD YOU ABOUT THOSE THINGS?!”

“Oh, fuck, when did he get here?” Callea says.

You start to stiffen, ready to face the consequences, but Komlee grabs one arm and Rayshe grabs the other and they hustle you out of the block along with the rush of other people fleeing Naspar and the probable arrival of people-actually-authorized-to-discipline you.

“He’ll be distracted with Gathay for a while,” Komlee says. “That wasn’t a half-bad fighting bot. You memorize the designs for that?”

“Mostly,” you say. “I had to adjust the feet slightly to account for the different surfaces it would be on–”

“We’re keeping him,” Rayshe says.


	258. Q&A VIII

**I realize that it is highly, highly unlikely that any of the older jadebloods would have noticed/remembered, but if some of them interacted with little grub baby Karkat and Feferi, who were extra special cases, did they also interact with baby Kanaya? I know the records are gone, but did anyone suspect at a glance that she was a perfect jade?**

Surewait: We identify all perfect jades to jump them past the Trials.  
Surewait: Two to four a brood is pretty standard.  
Surewait: Someone here would have moved her. Not sure who, after all this time – especially with the records… issue…

* * *

**For any of the jadebloods: Recent business aside, what's the most common cause of death in the caverns? Is it mainly old age? Also, how common is it to be bitten by a grub, and do grubs carry rabies?**

Oncetold: The most common cause of death – er, until recently – is a fungal respiratory condition. It usually only kills the elderly, though.

Perses: Grubs do not carry rabies. But they do bite ALL THE FUCKING TIME, and a small proportion of them have vestigial venom glands, and all of them have bites that can give you a really nasty infection. I’ve spent more time in the mediblocks getting booster inoculations…  
Maltha: You might not have such a problem if you didn’t keep taking your gloves off FOR SOME REASON.

* * *

**Now I'm curious, Gamzee, does the demoness show up in any of the juggalo mythology?**

Gamzee: …  
Gamzee: Those stories are pretty scary. :o(

* * *

**0k: Hey Perlen, who are you and what's your backstory? How'd you end up on the Gleeful Abandon?**

Aradia: He was just some lowblood conscript who draw the short straw and got picked to be killed by trainee subjugglators.  
Aradia: That WASN’T on the Gleeful Abandon. I’m not quite sure how Gamzee managed to get so tangled up with him that he couldn’t get away while Gamzee was still alive.  
Aradia: Chucklevoodoos are weird.

* * *

**0k: Aradia, how does that work? Do lowbloods just get killed instead of conscripted?**

Aradia: Uh… not… all of us, obviously?  
Aradia: I think there’s sort of a pool of sort of ‘general untrained lowbloods nobody would miss’ they pull from for their murdertraining.

* * *

**Two to four perfect jadebloods a brood? Yeesh. Has there been any ideas of either jadebloods donating more often or getting not just jumped past trials, but raised in the caverns? Cuz that is an itty bitty population size.**

Altadona: We have a population equilibrium. We discussed trying to increase the number for… other reasons which are now considerably less urgent.   
Altadona: More donations was discussed, but it turns out that is not a very reliable way to manipulate output ratios.   
Altadona: Raising them in the caverns would remove lusii from the equation, which would have been extremely counterproductive.  
Altadona: And perfect jades do have quite low attrition numbers once past the trials – we usually don’t lose more than one.

* * *

**So 'perfect' jadebloods are pretty rare..what about the other castes? How rare are the 'perfect' shades of the various blood colors?**

Perses: THAT depends on where the lines get drawn!  
Perses: …I think it’s usually pretty comparable, actually, by ratio – maybe two to three times as many imperfects as perfects.   
Perses: Which is skewed toward perfect pretty considerably, when you consider the RANGE encompassed.  
Perses: …Hmm, looking at it that way, should we be getting more inarguable limebloods? Not that I’m complaining…  
Perses: Maybe someone up the line is disposing of eggs? Can you distinguish color in eggs?

* * *

**Vriska, weird question but after you died what happened to your robo-arm? Did it get stolen or scrapped for parts? Does it count as enough a part of your body that you can easily haunt the area it's in?**

Vriska: …  
Vriska: I don’t want to talk about it.   
Erithe: They put it in the inorganics recycler.   
Aradia: Ghosts tend not to be all that attached to their bodies.

* * *

**Naspar, any arterrorist aspirations? Specifically in the field of adding clothing to posters your co-workers put up that freaked you the heck out?**

Naspar: No.   
Naspar: I know who did it, but no.

* * *

**Cultist Jade ghosts: If you had real faith in the prophecy that the signless 2 would end the world, why stick around as ghosts to make sure it comes true? Just pass on and let the destiny your religion foretold happen.**

Skeleton: One, you’re assuming they have any idea how to “pass on”. Trying to dissipate doesn’t help if you can’t relax into it.  
Skeleton: Two, I don’t think most of them were PLANNING on taking any role, but then the Second Signless appeared and things did not go as they were supposed to, so clearly the prophecy is off track.

* * *

**0k: if everyone goes into conscription hoping to become part of the various armed forces, how do people end up as maintenance/medcullers/food prep staff/security?**

Turtur: Everyone? I don’t know where you got that idea, I was hoping for something… non-armed. I didn’t get it, to start with, but that’s what I wanted.  
Mediculler Cleancut: Mediculling corps was my first choice.  
Backwing: I think there are usually plenty of conscripts who want to be medicullers or mediculler aides, admins, IT… all the usual midblood noncombat positions.  
Backwing: There’s a bit of a stigma about bluebloods with desk jobs, though.  
Takedown: If you’re a lowblood and you don’t apply for – and test for – one of the positions open to lowbloods, or if you don’t make the cut, you get classified as a menial and assigned accordingly. They don’t tell you that ahead of time.

* * *

**0k: so are there people in the Fleet whose job is to make porn? How does one get into that line of work?**

Backwing: Oh, yes.  
Backwing: They USUALLY recruit from the acterrorist pool, I think, but sometimes will try to nab people from elsewhere.   
Backwing: To get into it deliberately…  
Backwing: The two strategies I know of are to post your amateur porn on the fleetnet and hope it gets noticed, or to try to find out who to talk to through delicate social networking. Start by asking about someone’s other films, or where they got their training.  
Backwing: I had a cerulean who got dumped who wanted that as a next career, is why I know all this.

* * *

**0k: Is there any way that a necropath could un-dispel someone? What if they for some reason got halfway through dispelling a ghost and then stopped?**

Skeleton: Depends on the relative strength of the necropath who did the dispelling versus the one who wants to retrieve the ghost, how thorough the dispelling was, and the strength of the ghost. Time since dispelling can have an effect, too, but how much depends on the ghost.  
Skeleton: If it’s a particularly strong or motivated ghost and/or a half-assed dispelling, some ghosts can un-dispel THEMSELVES – Alesse Dalyce did, for example.  
Skeleton: Stopping halfway would depend on the ghost, how strong they were and whether they were fighting it – some would probably dissipate the rest of the way on their own, others would bounce back completely, some would be weakened and have to recover.

* * *

**0k: How did the Demoness become so powerful? Was she just lucky and born with an amazingly high level of power, or did something happen?**

Skeleton: She hasn’t said. Not to anyone still around to repeat it, at least.  
Skeleton: My guess is she was born amazingly powerful – like her descendant – and then died in some… very dramatic, very traumatic fashion.  
Skeleton: That can boost power necropath power even more than dying automatically does.  
Skeleton: …Very, very, very, very dramatic and traumatic.

* * *

**0k: When she was alive, was the Demoness a necropath or a helmsman?**

Skeleton: Well, she WAS – is – a necropath, and a psionic.  
Skeleton: I think you mean to ask was she a helmsman or in the Bureau of Retermination?  
Skeleton: Quite possibly neither. She died before adults were required to leave Alternia – not everyone was conscripted, then.  
Skeleton: At any rate, she hasn’t said. To anyone still around to repeat it.

* * *

**0k: Uh, Aradia, about those idiots who killed each other doing kinky rainbow drinker role-play... tell us more?**

Aradia: They didn’t get how to let blood safely.  
Aradia: The, uh, bleed-ee got dizzy and irrational and panicked and shot the bleed-er in the face.  
Aradia: Then finished up bleeding to death.

* * *

**So jades, you're the most likely to have pre-condess records...what was troll life like before her?**

Oncetold: If we have any, I’ve never seen them.  
 **How about the necropaths? Do they know anything about pre-condess trollkind? Could they try and summon up super old ghosts to ask them?**

Skeleton: Not in the Fleet.  
Skeleton: We know that there WAS such a time, and there WERE necropaths around back then, and theoretically some of them COULD still be around as ghosts, and we SHOULD be able to talk to them…  
Skeleton: But they aren’t in space! They didn’t die here, they never lived here, they presumably don’t want to come here, and even if we knew enough about them to summon them necropath ghosts that old are likely to be strong enough to resist.   
Skeleton: …If I have time while I’m down here I could go looking.

* * *

**0k ask: React to finding out that you will have to use TERMITE BASED SYSTEMS FOR THE REST OF YOUR LIFE**

Kebela: She cried.  
Perses: I did not.  
Ashtar: You kinda did.  
Perses: Fuck you.

* * *

**0k Nepeta: Have you ever thought about being a propagandartist or the person in charge of monitoring a ship's quadrants, since you were interested in art and shipping before?**

Nepeta: I thought about the propagandartist thing! Applying for it, anyway. I probably still could, if I used some of my free time to build up a portfolio… I think it has a bit more location-flexibility than some duties, so I might be able to do it even with quadrant-dictated postings.  
Nepeta: I had no idea ship monitoring even was a post, until I got here!  
Nepeta: I’m not sure it IS, most places.  
Nepeta: Unless you mean quadrant registry, that is maintained everywhere. It’s an admin position, and olives can apply. It doesn’t sound like a lot of fun, though.

* * *

**Dear Jades: Would monochromacy in a troll grub be a cull worthy defect?**

Perses: Like… black or white or gray blood?  
Maltha: That would inarguably be an out-of-spectrum mutation. Yes. Very much cull-worthy.  
Perses: I’ve never seen any, though.  
Surewait: I’ve never seen any completely monochrome-blooded grubs. There have been some with… with relatively low color SATURATION, still placeable on the spectrum but not as… vivid as normal. Those fall into a – ha, a gray area. I let them pass. Some don’t.

* * *

**its possible anon meant not being able to *see* colors**

Perses: Huh. I don’t think we would even identify that? If not seeing colors kills them in the Trials, then they fail, if it doesn’t, they pass.   
Surewait: Drones might cull them for it later, but it’s not something we look for.

* * *

**Hey Chidro, Cephal, Gamzee, what are troll bands like? Are there any really good ones?**

Chidro: I don’t think you can really describe all troll bands at once? There are all sorts of them.  
Chidro: Some of them are formed pre-Conscription and recruited as a group into Fleet morale.  
Chidro: Some of them are formed pre-Conscription and get broken up when they go into the Fleet, or manage to straggle along independently.  
Chidro: Some form on an amateur basis in the Fleet, and may or may not get recruited by Morale.  
Chidro: Some are formed by the propagandart division’s music department, and those are… sometimes good?

Chidro: My favorite operating band in the squadron is probably… I don’t know, there are a couple which aren’t bad at all, but nothing that really stands out…  
Chidro: No, wait! Does GHOST operating count? Because it turns out The Mayflies are still around!  
Chidro: They were – are? – SO GOOD. They were an ALL-RUSTBLOOD band that got recruited right into Fleet Morale, that’s how good.  
Chidro: Their pre-Conscription music was really influential to me as a kid – I was hoping they’d still be operational when I got into the Fleet, because even if they were in a different squadron Morale gets more cross-squadron communication. But they’d all died. Had done a lot of music before that, but they died.  
Chidro: But according to the ghost necropaths they’re still around! In another squadron, so I haven’t heard any of their stuff since they died, but there’s a chance, and if ghost computers really develop we could even get recordings! I’m so excited.

* * *

**How often does Her Imperious Condescension's ship need to get purged of ghosts? And do those necropaths ever come back?**

Bonebelt: Not very often, for which we are all very grateful, because those necropaths usually don’t come back.  
Bonebelt: To be fair sometimes it’s because they were considered useful or entertaining enough to keep around for the rest of their careers.   
Bonebelt: But not usually.  
Bonebelt: Some of that is because the Demoness is said to be there a lot, and going up against HER, well…  
Bonebelt: But it doesn’t happen often. Maybe every… fifty sweeps, maybe? Roughly?   
Bonebelt: Her Imperious Condescension is supposed to have some sort of… ghost resistance, somehow. And also doesn’t mind haunted ambiance, I guess. And supposedly a lot of potential ghosts just clear out immediately because that’s how much they want not to be there.

* * *

**If the dead necropaths knew there was a living heiress to keep globy calmed, could they do a united attack on HIC's ship and take her out?**

Skeleton: Mmmmmmmaybe?  
Skeleton: We could wreck the ship – or at least, wreck a ship of that kind…  
Skeleton: …I think we’d have to get the Demoness on board with it. I… have no idea what her opinion would be.   
Skeleton: A lot of the more… politically volatile dead necropaths aren’t very enthusiastic about replacing a tyrian with another tyrian anyway.   
Skeleton: The idea they tend to throw around is killing… the lusus itself.   
Skeleton: Which would DEFINITELY be impossible without the Demoness’s participation, in my opinion at least.

* * *

**Could even the demoness hold back the vast glub if you killed the heiress' lusus?**

Skeleton: I wouldn’t want to bet on it.

* * *

**So skeleton..if megido grows just as strong as her ancestor and dies what's trollkind going to do with two demonesses running around?**

Skeleton: My game plan is for Megido to live a long and as-happy-as-possible life and end up a powerful and SANE ghost.  
Skeleton: The power is scary, yeah. But it’s the nihilism that makes it disastrous.

* * *

**For the necropaths: What do you think will happen if trollkind wipes out a whole planet of a species with moderate to strong necropathic abilities?**

Bonebelt: I’ve… never actually run into any necropathic aliens.  
Bonebelt: That’s… that could be REALLY bad.

Skeleton: I’d say best case scenario is we’re all really busy.  
Skeleton: But an ENTIRE PLANET full of necropaths of Megido’s or even Bonebelt’s strength?  
Skeleton: Even if they didn’t get the boost troll necropaths would from dying in horrific circumstances…  
Skeleton: We might have to get every necropath in the Fleet together. And the damage that would be done before we could take them out…  
Skeleton: Not good.

* * *

**0k: Hey Condesce, has there ever been an Heiress who actually could have beaten you? What do you think it would take for one to kill you?**

Skeleton: Cheating, probably.   
Skeleton: My understanding is that in the old days, Heiresses would wait longer – get some backing, some more experience, some more HEIGHT – and only Challenge when they felt up to it or the lusus put its tentacle down.   
Skeleton: Some of those might have had a chance.   
Skeleton: But the age Conscription is at now? I’m not sure it’s physically possible for a tyrian of that age to beat the Condesce in hand-to-hand single combat.   
Skeleton: Without cheating. Friends, psionics, explosives, snipers – those could tip the balance.

* * *

**Has the lusus ever put up a fuss about condy coming to fight the heiresses so early?**

Feferi: Not with me, anyway.  
Feferi: 8(

* * *

**0k condy: Do you participate in any baking competitions or any empire holidays that focus on your baking prowress?**

Caterpillar: …  
Caterpillar: …The Great Fleet Bake-Off. It only happens every two hundred sweeps, the last one was forty sweeps ago…  
Caterpillar: …  
Caterpillar: Sculptor liked to watch the tapes for inspiration…

_[Entering a baking contest with the Condesce is like entering a weaving contest with Athena: DON’T DO IT. But they have to have SOME other contestants, so if they can’t find enough stupid people they conscript.]_

* * *

**0k: Caterpillar, what did you mean when you said you were Sculptor's medium?**

Caterpillar: …

Gamzee: Uh.  
Gamzee: So.  
Gamzee: I don’t really wanna talk about this but I think Caterpillarsis wants to talk about it even less so.  
Gamzee: You know how some, um. A lot of subjugglators like to paint. And the paint is.  
Gamzee: You know.  
Gamzee: It’s some poor motherfucker’s blood.  
Gamzee: Well.  
Gamzee: Some subjugglators wanna do art, but they don’t wanna paint.  
Gamzee: But they still, um.  
Gamzee: They don’t do it the way other people do.  
Gamzee: I think a lot of them use bones and other corpse stuff.  
Gamzee: But I guess to be called Sculptor, he must’ve been a really… a really top-class subjugglator sculptor.  
Gamzee: And didn’t just use corpse stuff.

Scavenge: Ohhhhh, I remember that guy! He was something else. I think when he died tranquilizer abuse among the Gleeful Abandon’s medicullers went down like twenty percent.

* * *

**Feferi, did it ever occur to you to try cheating in the Challenge? To maybe get Sollux or someone else to help you out?**

Feferi: No.  
Feferi: I actually thought I had a chance.  
Feferi: SO GLUBBING STUPID.

* * *

**0k: Hey Gamzee, how are you and Perlen getting on since Aradia untied you?**

Gamzee: He, uh…  
Gamzee: He doesn’t wanna see me, I don’t think.  
Gamzee: I… don’t really wanna see him either.

* * *

**How many ships are in the 0k squadron, and which is the best and worst to serve on?**

Backwing: Overall, there are [TRAIN ROARS BY OBSCURING DIALOGUE] ships and which one is best depends on who you are and what you want.

* * *

**Dear jades: What do grubs act like with each other? Do they tend to group up or cuddle or are they more likely to eat each other?**

Perses: They’ll scavenge bodies if they find them but they don’t hunt each other.   
Perses: As far as I can tell they don’t interact an awful lot either way?  
Perses: I mean, they crawl all over each other all the time, they like to move in big clusters, but I’ve never noticed them really… responding to each other as individuals.

* * *

**Can vriska still make the walls bleed and such or was that only a combined effort**

Aradia: Pretty sure the reason the scouting mission haunting was so spectacular was a combination of Vriska, combined effort, and it being directed RIGHT at the people who wronged them. They were very motivated and personally invested.  
Aradia: She’s still above-average at that sort of thing – that’s why Scavenge keeps wanting to borrow her for his haunting-based extortion schemes – but it’s not as strong when it’s not personal.

* * *

**0k: hey Terezi/Cannis, what happened with that guy who got staked? Did he die? Any clue why? Any repercussions?**

Terezi: Ah yes, Mr. Laovic!  
Terezi: He’s alive.   
Skaree: And conscious, coherent, etc, at least after some recovery time. Not brain-damaged enough to be culled, for a purple. He may recover more – not my field. Anyway this hasn’t killed him.   
Skaree: What it might have done is made him too stupid to be a legislacerator.  
Turtur: CANnis…  
Skaree: …  
Skaree: It might have had cognitive effects that would interfere with the rapid evaluation and decision-making needed for legislaceration. Or, people might assume it did.   
Turtur: :)  
Eridan: …Whipped.  
Nepeta: …Teach me how to do that.   
Jorjel: It’s not all Pachex, it’s that Skaree is a bundle of suppressed insecurities and uncertainties.  
Mustel: Aren’t we all?  
Terezi: ANYWAY, Mr. Laovic may be transferred to ruffiannihilator training, but he’s fighting it.   
Terezi: Solving the case has been made a class assignment for trainees two cadres above us.   
Terezi: …I suspect this is because the instructors believe the culprit, or at least one of the culprits, is IN that cadre, and they think it’s entertaining.   
Sharpeye: …Damn good instincts on her.

* * *

**So what's the major differences in stuff you can access now that you're all recruited adults? Internet wise or education wise or whatnot?**

Sollux: There’s a whole FleetNet which is usually inaccessible from Alternia. There are connections to it on the conscription platform, which is how I got in to create the dropbox before I got taken off for helmsman… stuff.   
Sollux: Adults aren’t supposed to be on the GrubNet – the internet kids are on – at all. They copy parts of it onto FleetNet every round of conscription, but I’m not sure how they choose what parts.   
Sollux: And of course other stuff gets downloaded, carried along, and reuploaded by individual conscripts.

* * *

**Nepeta: How are you going to keep up with the fanfics or fanart you've read if you can't get on the grubnet to read updates? What if the authors don't re-upload when they get conscripted?!**

Nepeta: I caaaaaaaaaan’t it’s pawful!  
Eridan: If someone on Alternia is still writing it any updates could be gotten in the next round of Conscription.  
Eridan: …If I cared about that. Which I don’t.  
Nepeta: On the bright side there’s a whole new range of stuff I can see now I couldn’t before.  
Sollux: I miss some of my forums.  
Sollux: …I think the brooding caverns aren’t supposed to access the grubnet, but can if they try. I wonder if I could write a bot that would crawl the grubnet for specific content and send it back in the overhead of the status pings…? Depends on how difficult it is to compensate for termites… I need to think about this some more.

* * *

**To anyone on the fleet with experience: What kind of weird powers have aliens you've run into had?**

Captain Farsight: The ones with the defensive projectile vomiting were, uh… memorable.

Pedagogue Hightide: When I was a young officer, there was a very… difficult planet which was almost entirely ocean, so landdweller ground troops were ineffective and seadwellers had to be sent in. The natives turned out to have some sort of hydrokinesis, and also an absurd range of temperature and pressure tolerance.  
Pedagogue Hightide: …There might have been some organized resistance still hiding in the icecapped regions or the deep-sea vents at the end of the operation, but the higher-ups declared it pacified, and no one was about to argue with them.

Bluemind: Um, so when I was a, um, when I was in the psycrucifiers, there was a planet, with, uh… what was it… um…  
Graywire: Magnetism control. It was freaky.

* * *

**main 12 trolls, what has been your favorite content you can access in now in the fleet (movies/shows/whatever media you want that you couldn't get before)**

_(Clarifying my earlier post – while the two internets are disconnected, some movies/tv shows/other media made on Alternia are sent to the Fleet, and vice versa. So a lot of professional content is available both places.)_

Aradia: Hmm… I guess the dead necropath information network isn’t really what you’re talking about? I did find this photo collection of skulls that had been beautifully cleaned and displayed. A corpselocker worker’s hobby, I think. Gorgeous pictures.   
Aradia: …What?  
Tavros: There’s a, um, an amateur animated movie, of Pupa Pan, which incorporates the themes, better than anything else I’ve ever seen.  
Sollux: The Fleet has some terrible, TERRIBLE reality shows. …And more accurate Helmsman info.  
Karkat: …There are a few interesting romantic comedies.  
Nepeta: Ummmm… I don’t know…  
Terezi: Old court records!  
Vriska: There are massive roleplaying forums. Of course I can’t get on them…  
Equius: I… have no favorites.  
Gamzee: Some music. Might have been available on Alternia, too.  
Eridan: …I really liked Auspistice of the Rainbow Drinkers.  
Feferi: Yeah, that one was hilarious.

* * *

**Tavros: Does anyone ask you to translate for their lusii?**

Tavros: All my new colleagues are too lowblooded to bring their lusii  
Tavros: And I think other people mostly don’t… know me well enough, I guess? For something that personal?

* * *

**Dear Jades: If HIC decided the current crop of lowbloods was too rowdy and rebellious, could she tell you to hold off having the mother grub lay eggs until the everyone under olive had died of old age?**

Vigilant: …  
Vigilant: Uh, wow.   
Vigilant: Um… okay, where to start.   
Vigilant: We can’t control the laying or influence it except by adjusting slurry and nutrition intake. Lowering nutrition enough to stop laying would kill her. Even if we completely cut slurry intake there’d still be enough for some eggs to be laid for… I’m not sure, sweeps.   
Vigilant: So no, we can’t flip a switch and stop egg production.   
Vigilant: We could… theoretically someone could try to destroy all the eggs before they hatched.   
Oncetold: I’m not clear on what the expected benefit would be, though? Say everything went perfectly and the Caverns didn’t implode over it, and so now you had a blank slate to work with genetically, and no one under olive alive, and no pre-adults or young adults, period.   
Oncetold: That sort of gap would fuck things up here. I’m guessing it would fuck things up everywhere. They’d never manage to get knowledge transfer worked out in time.   
Oncetold: To say nothing of all the lowblood jobs SOMEBODY would have to do in the meantime. And then those people’s old jobs would have to be filled, until everyone is doing work beneath their station and some work isn’t getting done at all.   
Skeleton: Just to jump in here, if you sent highblood troops on the sorts of missions they currently send disposable lowblood troops on, I’m pretty sure they’d start running out of highbloods.   
Oncetold: Oh, and I think the latest estimate is… 96% of helmsmen-grade psionics are lowbloods. So that’s 96% of the fleet dead in space.   
Skeleton: (Dead in space with no one to calm down any irate lowblood ghosts.)  
Oncetold: And even if they stored psionic genetic material to try to get on that immediately, it’s not that easy.   
Oncetold: It would probably take another hundred sweeps to get back to ANYTHING LIKE capacity.   
Skeleton: And in the meantime there are a few aliens who’d be interested in trolls with diminished capabilities.  
Oncetold: It’s an unbelievably stupid idea. Even for the Empress.

* * *

**0k Jades: No offense but it seems kind of slipshod that you guys let the whole mother grub situation deteriorate like this. How was the last transition between mother grubs handled?**

Altadona: I would very much like to know how the records of that transition were lost.   
Altadona: We barely knew about Matriorbs.  
Altadona: When it was first realized that the Mother Grub was truly becoming old – a long time ago, now, I was still a novice – many people were shocked that it was even possible.  
Altadona: I don’t know what else we’ve forgotten.   
Altadona: …The oldest surviving records show signs of having been tampered with.   
Altadona: I’ve… wondered, from time to time, if every altadona has been as successful as I have at keeping subjugglators and the like out of the Caverns.

* * *

**the adults are gone, do kids try to break in [to the Brooding Caverns]?**

Oncetold: Not often, but every couple of sweeps someone shows up on a dare, or lost. Even more rarely a kid will show up for a WEIRDER reason – there was one who wanted to personally choose a grub to give his lusus so the lusus wouldn’t be lonely when the kid was conscripted. And one who wanted to steal slurry.

* * *

**Aw, cute. what happened to that second last kid?**

Perses: Oh, I heard about this.   
Surewait: We threw him out with a warning, but…  
Maltha: *ominous omnidirectional glowering*  
Perses: Someone gave him a grub on his way out!   
Surewait: It was missing a leg and probably wouldn’t have made it through the Trials, and the chances a lusus would accept a wiggler it hadn’t chosen were very low, so she was probably right that it wouldn’t make a difference in the long run.   
Surewait: She still got put on slurry duty for a very long time, and when she got off punishment detail they put her in something not handling grubs.   
Perses: This was all way before I got here, despite how personally Maltha likes to take it. The kid must be conscripted by now – and the grub, if it lived, I guess.   
Cirrus Caelum: *sneezes*

* * *

**0k: Eridan, how have things been on the MMP since Sennet and Sessor's rampage? Have things calmed down?**

Eridan: Well they HAD.  
Eridan: Until everything turned into the BULGE INQUISITION all of a sudden.  
Eridan: They could’ve just left it to the computer geeks to try to track down the virus, but nooooo, they have to try to find the culprit in house – uh, on-ship – FIRST.  
Nepeta: Eridan is refurring to the computer virus that overwrote random files in infected computers with various images of a seadweller’s bulge.  
Nepeta: …Poor Equius.  
Eridan: Do they try to find an in-house computer geek? No, of course not!  
Backwing: I could have offered them a couple of possibilities.  
Eridan: Do they investigate everyone’s computers? No!  
Eridan: I mean I’m just as happy about that but it really seems like the logical first step…  
Sollux: Not necessarily, any serious hacker wouldn’t do illicit stuff on their public machine.  
Eridan: …Oh.  
Eridan: Well, that aside, there must have been a better approach than REQUIRING EVERYONE TO PROVE IT WASN’T THEIR BULGE IN THE IMAGES!

* * *

**Especially since it doesn't have to be the same person with the bulge that did the virus**

Backwing: Statistically speaking – I hate that I know this – statistically speaking, things that OBLIGE people to look at images of genitalia, by intruding into the viewer’s virtual space, are more likely to be perpetrated by the owner of the genitalia than things that merely advertise the opportunity.  
Backwing: And I think they were hoping if the… subject wasn’t the virus-writer, they’d at least have a lead on who it could be.   
Backwing: So it wasn’t… totally irrational, as a strategy? They handled it really badly, though.

* * *

**Leelee: What movie were you watching that got interrupted?**

Leelee: Troll Mary Poppins.

[Troll Mary Poppins isn’t quite a horror movie, but it’s definitely considered trippy and not for little kids.]

* * *

**0k: Hey Damara, you've been dead for so long and you're so powerful... have you ever tried to kill the Empress? Or an Heiress, or even their lusus? Doesn't just wrecking random ships get boring?**

Skeleton: She killed an Heiress during a Challenge a couple hundred sweeps back.   
Skeleton: Fight’s about over, Empress is coming in for the kill – and then the Demoness explodes the poor kid’s lower digestive tract.   
Skeleton: The Empress was COVERED in blood and guts and shit, and then she killed any spectator she suspected of laughing.

* * *

**Hey Sollux! Now that the ash fuckers are being followed around by Gamzee are they happy or do they actually miss the music?**

Sollux: …Well, remember that question a while back about whether helmsmen could coopt the public address system?  
Sollux: Ehehehe.  
Sollux: Professional recordings wouldn’t do it, though, so it’s Mycota on the xylophone.

* * *

**to 0k kids: How far did this virus of bulgic proportions go? (And what are the odds it's HIC?)**

Equius: Urrrrk.  
Nepeta: Please don’t make it worse.   
Eridan: I, uh, don’t think HIC does things anonymously.   
Eridan: …and it was apparently identifiably violet.   
Tavros: Ewwwww.  
Sollux: Anyway they tracked the hacker down in a few days.   
Eridan: And it was a senior cadet here, NOT a student.   
Mustel: I was kind of expecting it to be Awwakk.  
Eridan: How, her computer keeps spontaneously combusting?

* * *

**0k: Hey Terezi, historically, what's been the Fleet crime/criminal that got the most media coverage?**

Terezi: That is a surprisingly loaded question due to the way Fleet media works!  
Terezi: The official NEWS-DISTRIBUTION media is propaganda. It pays the most attention to informing everyone about mutiny and treason trials, and very little attention to anything else.   
Terezi: Apparently there was a mass trial a few hundred sweeps ago, of pretty much all the ground forces assigned to a particular alien planet, which the official channels went on about for seasons and seasons?  
Terezi: We watched some of the coverage in class, but I’m still not at all clear on what actually happened.   
Terezi: Then there’s entertainment media, stuff like Legislacerators: Particularly Depraved Criminals and other, less fictionalized things, which tend to pick up the more sensational stories.   
Terezi: Overbear was pretty fucking sensational.   
Terezi: I’m not sure what the other contenders for that would be…  
Sharpeye: Over my career there have been two other quadrant murderers, someone who poisoned half a ship for no particular reason, and a psychic operating a crime ring of sixty-seven mind-controlled people.   
Terezi: …Like, sixty-seven all at once? Wow.   
Terezi: The third kind of media is the… personal interaction sort of media. It focuses on sensational stuff, too, but also anything where someone of higher status is being charged with crimes against someone of lower status.

* * *

**How ash kinky is that, that Sollux is stepping in to auspisticize between Gamzee's leaves?**

Sollux: It’s a bit sketchy.   
Sollux: Be sketchier if they’d ever actually agreed he was their auspistice.   
Sollux: Without that it’s not really a quadrant.

* * *

**So, Cirrus... what was your lusus like?**

Cirrus: A ceratopsian! Pretty large one, too.   
Cirrus: Not the most practical kind of lusus, but we managed (with a little help).   
Cirrus: Of course there was no hope of anything that big getting into the Fleet, so we went on a… rather long trek to find a welcoming ceratopsian herd, to avoid loneliness.

* * *

**Dear Jadebloods: Do you think jadeblood life was more interesting before all the adults got kicked off planet? At least then you could probably live in towns near the caverns or visit them or cities sometimes. Any records from pre-summoner days?**

Oncetold: Some!  
Oncetold: And it looks like non-perfect jades at least did have more opportunities for… extra-Caverns social activity.  
Oncetold: Perfect jades were already expected to be more… cloistered.   
Oncetold: Which is odd given they’re all sun-tolerant, but what can I say.

Oncetold: …Come to think of it, maybe it was BECAUSE they’re sun-tolerant and people wanted them not to be in the sun – because that’s how you get latent rainbow drinkers.  
Oncetold: Especially if they tried to pull in novices even younger then, which there’s some evidence of…  
Oncetold: I think I may be on to something here.

* * *

**To all trolls: what kind of religions do you guys have?**

Aradia: Most religion seems to be pretty… understated. Apparently subjugglators have a history of going around beating up anyone following anything else that seems like a religion?  
Aradia: I really don’t see why, since it’s not like they invite people to join their cult.   
Aradia: Anyway even things that are perfectly legal tend to try to stay out of sight.

* * *

**Hey Sollux, I'm curious: is there much media about helmsmen that's been sympathetic to their point of view? Hell, is there much media about helmsmen at all?**

Sollux: There’s more than a few things set on ships where the helmsman dispenses sage advice to the heroes.   
Sollux: Or where the helmsman is… thoroughly conflated with the ship, in a… supposedly affectionate manner.   
Sollux: Oh, but there was one episode of one of those where the helmsman was infected with an alien virus that interfered with his connection with the ship, and it had him screaming about not being able to move and the biowires burrowing. All due to the alien virus, of course, but it sounded like someone did their research.   
Sollux: Let’s see… There’s this weird micro-genre, mostly in written stuff, of bluebloods finding out they have ALL THE PSYCHIC POWERS and they frequently have a terrifying brush with being helmed before the Empire realizes their amazing talents are better used elsewhere.   
Sollux: They’re mostly garbage, but they usually come out and acknowledge that wanting to run away screaming, or even actually running away, is a reasonable response to the prospect of helming. At least if you’re a blueblood.   
Sollux: There’s a really soap opera-ish thing set on a medical frigate narrated by the helmsman, and she’s almost always a passive observer and doesn’t address any of helming’s downsides but she does have a good character voice.  
Sollux: And, I mean. There’s amateur stuff.

* * *

**What about the genre of shitty paperback romances where the helmsman is fully awake and and innocent young nobleblood ensign/engineer/captain falls in torrid, forbidden pity with them?**

Sollux: Those do not exist.   
Karkat: Those exist.   
Sollux: No they don’t.   
Sollux: …At least not near Wireburn. Wireburn takes their sloppy engineering protocols extremely personally.

* * *

**Do helmsmen ever make their own media? Like, cobble together a 3d engine since they can’t do actual filming, or use their video surveillance in a kind of “found footage” way to make something?**

Sollux: Sometimes.   
Sollux: So far at least, that all falls under amateur stuff.

* * *

**Yo TZ, are there any REALLY famous crimes that the criminals never got caught for? Like a Troll Jack the Ripper? And not just a suspected never confirmed, or a crime that got a forced scape goat, but like something big that is still a mystery? Those are probably suppressed cause it looks bad, but rumors are a thing that exist.**

Terezi: I can think of a few!  
Terezi: Vanishing ship issues aren’t really in our purview, but if the ship shows up with everyone – or even most people – dead that’s another matter.   
Sollux: More than a few of those were integrated systems that suffered ~helm-originating malfunctions~.  
Terezi: I think they check that first. But there was one a few hundred sweeps ago called the, hmm, Relentless Termination of Inferior Life, that turned out to have everyone on board MESSILY dead, and the helmsman died first. That’s still unsolved.   
Skeleton: …  
Terezi: On a smaller scale… I think Vissen Stuary’s murder was pretty infamous even before he got tied to Overbear.  
Terezi: oh, but bigger than that – this was in another squadron, but someone exsanguinated one seadweller a sweep for five hundred sweeps exactly and then just STOPPED.

* * *

**… . so … . . skeleton … . . mostly the Handmaid then huh?**

 

Skeleton: That particular case was ENTIRELY the Demoness.   
Skeleton: She left, uh. Ghost graffiti.

* * *

**I have to ask: why did Overbear go so overkill on poor Stuary?**

Alesse: If I recall correctly, he said some insulting things about Overbear’s sexual performance.

* * *

**0k Jadebloods: Would a male perfect Jade be allowed in the Inner Caverns if they also had a mother grub lusus?**

Altadona: Yes.  
Altadona: We were waiting for that for a very long time.  
Altadona: If a virgin mother grub lusus somehow decided to take on a NON-JADE we would have insisted they were a perfect jade bound for the Inner Caverns.

* * *

**Is the Demoness the only troll bogeyman?**

Skeleton: She’s certainly the most VERIFIED one.  
Aradia: …Unless you count all the undead.  
Skeleton: Oh right, those.  
Aradia: Sometimes it really shows how long you’ve been off planet.  
Tavros: Did anyone else hear the, uh, story about the limeblood cult? That is supposed to, um, kidnap pre-adults to be quadrant slaves in their kinky quadrant-mixing shooshpail cult?  
Sollux: Is that a bogeyman or an urban legend?  
Terezi: There are some supposedly extra-haunted places on Alternia?  
Bonebelt: Some really legendary Grand Highblood is supposedly still haunting the most important subjugglator ship in the Fleet, culling the unworthy.  
Feferi: Does the Empress count as a boogeyman?

* * *

**0k: Terezi, what's your favourite thing that you've studied in class, be it a law, a case study, or something else?**

Terezi: …We are NOT supposed to reveal this.  
Terezi: Ever.  
Terezi: There’s a seminar on puns.

* * *

**Could ghosts try to possess the fighting robots on Equius' ship, or can they only do that for soulbots specifically tailored to them?**

_[Soulbots aren’t really a thing in this ‘verse, but…]_

Aradia: Um, a dead necropath could, if they wanted to for some reason…  
Sollux: I think at its root the control circuitry is in the same… universe of things as the interfaces the ghosts have been using to access the dropbox and so on, so I feel like with a LOT of practice, a regular strong ghost would be able to control one?  
Aradia: …You’re probably right. Not really possess it, but control it, yes, after extensive practice.

* * *

**So if the perfect jades would have claimed a non-jade as perfect if a virgin mother grub had chosen them... could that have even overridden the order to cull limebloods and redbloods? Or would that grub have not even gotten far enough to be chosen by the mothergrub?**

Surewait: No off-spectrum mutations are supposed to make it far enough to encounter lusii.

Altadona: If one somehow had, though… We would have hidden lusus and wiggler somewhere, to grow up in safety.

* * *

**Hey Skeleton, aside from the Demoness, who is the oldest and/or most active ghost still around?**

Skeleton: Conventional wisdom is it is probably a dead necropath on Alternia somewhere, because dead necropaths tend to last longer, and not very many ghosts leave the planet for space.  
Skeleton: I understand that more than a few of the oldest ships in service in the Fleet are still haunted by their original helmsmen.  
Skeleton: The oldest dead-necropath-called-Skeleton in the Fleet was dragged up quite a while pre-Summoner to try to clear out alien ghosts from a drop ship.

* * *

**Bets on how long it's going to take Vriska to realize that she may one day be strong enough to control robots with deadly weaponry like the one that was fighting Equius' robot and blew a hole through the ceiling?**

Aradia: I’m not sure she’s got the patience for that.  
Aradia: Especially as she’d probably accidentally destroy the robot every time she lost her patience.

* * *

**Hey Tavros, what's that alligator lusus up to nowadays? Have you had to wrangle anything else major lately?**

Tavros: The crocodile lusus continues to be, uh, energetic.  
Tavros: It’s taken to whining at me.  
Tavros: The giant centipede never learns.  
Tavros: More recently, it is apparently, owl-lusus mating season?  
Tavros: I’ve had to intervene, several times.

* * *

**Wait... so if it's owl-lusus mating season, that means there are soon going to be a bunch of baby lusii/eggs around, right? What happens to them? Do they get put in storage somewhere? Is there a designated "wildlife reserve" ship that periodically drops space-born lusii back on Alternia?**

Tavros: Well, there might be, if there was a female owl-lusus on board, instead of just, three male ones.  
Tavros: And whatever they decide, might be a female owl-lusus.  
Tavros: Mostly people’s heads.  
Tavros: It’s unfortunate.  
Tavros: They never target their own trolls, so the trolls tend to just, point and laugh, instead of trying to stop it.

* * *

**Are there any troll folktale heroes?**

Bonebelt: Sure.  
Bonebelt: There’s a necropath betting pool on how long it takes Megido and her terrifying ghost army to become one.


	259. ==> BE OUTSIDER POVS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0k kids who don't get to interact much getting scenes together? Either due to some ship shake up that sends them somewhere else for a while or the ships being close and young trolls being allowed to switch between them for a few days, or whatever reason. (I admit I largely want to see some of the npcs get to interact with members of the main 12 they wouldn't otherwise meet)

==> MOLLYM: MEET A CREEPY INQUISITORMENTOR [TRAINEE]

You are blaming Kellep for this. He just HAD to try to offer his matesprit’s affidavit that it wasn’t his bulge in the virus images. He should have just submitted to indignity.

For that matter, Undertow should have known that dismissing a trainee legislacerator’s testimony as not trustworthy would upset the legislacerators!

And Hightide should have found some way to placate them besides letting them into the investigation! Why is a seadweller placating landdwellers anyway?!

And if the legislacerators had to come here, they should be treating it as the HONOR and PRIVILEGE that it is, not some sort of – field training exercise!

So you are blaming everyone for this, actually, but that doesn’t change the teal trainee sitting across from you, GRINNING.

“So, Ms. Awwakk!” she says. “I understand you’ve been having computer problems lately!”

HOW DOES SHE EVEN KNOW THAT?

==> CANNIS: MEET A CATTROLL

You determined in the first five minutes of Investerrogator Dartrail’s speech that none of the assembled quadrant-sinecures have any weak spots relating to lewd computer viruses. Unless the all-out psychic does, but you’re not touching that. Your weak little one-trick powers are useless against a proper psychic.

Well, Dartrail is still going strong, and Pappad is zoning out, so check out the people more generally. Supervisor has a soft spot for some of the supervisees. Purple is prickly and vulnerable – oh, right, the surviving middle leaf of the catastrophe kismeses. Jorjel is trying to make faces at you whenever Dartrail is looking elsewhere. Olive with a definite cat motif feels like (secrets), and you’re curious for a minute until you realize it must be Jorjel’s blockmate, Pyrope’s friend, and yeah, THOSE secrets you wouldn’t touch with a ship-length pole even if you DIDN’T owe Pyrope multiple favors to be determined.

==> CEPHAL: MEET A SWEATY BLUEBLOOD

Custom mech/biomech interface pieces can be obtained a couple of ways, but you’ve had the best results commissioning them from the junior prosthetics design engineers. It comes up more than you might expect, because the standard override nodes leave a lot to be desired, and they wear out fast. So it’s not unusual for you to be heading to the Brutal Domination’s engineering workblocks with a tablet full of sketches.

This time, you pause just inside, eying the print hung on on a nearby partition. “Huh.”

The nearest blueblood – must be new, you don’t recognize him – straightens up a little. “It is a reproduction of the classic work of art, ‘Musclebeast Struggling In The Clutches Of The Great Octopus’.”

“Hmm, just… tentacles don’t really look like that?”

“Uh–” He starts to sweat.

“And I really don’t see why the octopus would even want to–”

Fortunately Komlee comes to meet you before the blueblood’s head actually explodes from flushing. You still wonder what the painter was thinking, though.


	260. ==> BE ALCYON SOLDIE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: I would love to see more of Terezi worrying sea dwellers

==> BE ALCYON SOLDIE

The inquisitormentor… trainee, or whatever, won’t stop grinning. You haven’t noticed a single other expression on her face, when the legislacerators arrived or since this stupid interview started. It’s unnerving. The opaque red glasses aren’t helping, either.

“So, Ms. Soldie!” she says. “You’re not very socially active among your peers, are you.”

What good is being a seadweller if you still have to put up with this shit? “What does it matter? Why are you even talking to me? Do I look like the kind of person who does viruses?”

She grins even wider, which you wouldn’t have thought was possible. “I wouldn’t know!” She whips her glasses off, and you flinch back from the scar tissue that should be eyes, despite yourself.

(You’re not squeamish, you just have refined sensibilities.)

The inquisitormentor purses her lips. “You do ACT like someone who wouldn’t send bulge pictures without accompanying poetry.”

“I wouldn’t send bulge pictures AT ALL.”

“Just the poetry, then?”

“I just said I don’t know anything about viruses!”

“But you do have poetry?”

How does she know about the poetry?!


	261. ==> BE AURICH FRIEAS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Frieas: Find a high blue and try and be the great pacificator.

==> BE AURICH FRIEAS

The purple makes a strangled noise of frustration, tries to tug on his shaved hair, and ends up gripping his horn instead. He looks like he doesn’t know whether to start screaming or punch the wall.

You’re just off duty. No Nineeyes or Takedown or Nitram in sight. Perfect.

You sidle up and put a gentle hand on his elbow. “Sir?” you ask, as ‘harmless subservient lowblood’ as you can get. “Is something wrong?”

He pinches the bridge of his nose. “EVERYTHING’S wrong.”

PERFECT.


	262. ==> BE SHARPWIT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we get the viewpoint of the recon ship crew while Vriska was alive? Maybe their perspective on being used to kill people they don't even know?

==> BE SHARPWIT

They’ve sent you another one – midblue, robot arm, psychic, so fresh off the platform you can practically smell Alternia on her. No applicable skills, so theoretically she should be learning as she goes. Practically… yeah, practically this one isn’t a good fit, either.

You’d LIKE to have the ship fully crewed with a GOOD crew, but they’ve never sent you anyone who really fits. That Probos kid wasn’t actively annoying, but he was still really *meh*, and he’s the closest you’ve gotten in sweeps and sweeps. You have something PERFECT going on here, and you don’t want anything to wreck that.


	263. ==> BE ERIDAN [fielding questions]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we see Eridan getting grilled by some trainees when his ship got the legislacerators visiting?

==> BE ERIDAN

The older cadres are having exams. Icthee and Bissel are, happily, thoroughly distracted badgering Kellep about his matesprit. (Icthee thinks she’s unattractive and wants to know if ‘she’s a good enough pail to make up for it’. Bissel thinks dating a legislacerator means he’s a masochist.) Buuut that still leaves Soldie, actually deigning to talk to them for a change.

“You KNEW that weird blind inquisitormentor trainee!” she accuses.

“Well… yeah. So?”

She makes a vague gesture, and starts to speak a few times before finally blurting, “What the FUCK?”

“Yeah, that’s Pyrope.”


	264. ==> BE KANAYA [worrying]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: So kanaya..how's the matriorb doing?

==> BE KANAYA

Attender Wisehand lowers the stethoscope and sits back. “Well, as far as I can tell, all the unsanctioned noise hasn’t done any damage.”

You were already pretty sure of that, but you’re relieved anyway. Of course– “What about… if there’s more noise?” (Karkat swore his crack team of ghosts would keep anything from touching the Matriorb, but he didn’t say anything about guaranteeing peace and quiet.)

“Well–” Wisehand breaks off at a distant crashing noise that hopefully is a storage unit being knocked over in the darkness, not another cave-in. Wisehand makes a face, and whispers, “I hope not, but I can’t say for sure, but that hardly matters since it’s not like we can stop it at this point.”


	265. Q&A IX

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> NB: Q&A V was recently expanded with some stuff that wasn't tagged/archived at the time

**0k tavros: If you had known ahead of time how bad cavelreaping would be, could you have tried for a job like a vet or something? (or vetorturer or whatever trolls would call it), or are you too low?**

Tavros: I couldn’t be an actual beastmediculler, but a zoopath who applies can become an aide there.  
Tavros: It wouldn’t have been, all good either – beastmedicullers do CULLING, too.  
Tavros: Probably still better than cavalreapers turned out to be.

* * *

**Dear sollux: Did you upload that video of Equius lusus finding those midbloods in karkat's rhododendrons (mentioned in chapter 79) to trolltube? If so did it become popular enough to become a minor meme?**

Sollux: I did.  
Sollux: Both GrubTube and then FleetTube later.  
Sollux: I don’t know about back on Alternia, but a bit of Aurthour has been going around the squadron as a reaction GIF.

* * *

**Vriska: Have you tried to get any of the ghosts to rp as people from mindfangs past in garping? Get someone playing duelscar or darkleer or the mysterious beautiful jade slave?**

Vriska: …  
Vriska: Briefly, no.  
Vriska: I don’t…  
Vriska: Dualscar is Eridan’s thing, and anyway who wants to roleplay a messy breakup?  
Vriska: Darkleer would be boring.  
Vriska: And as for the slave – who I don’t think it said was jade, just not lowblood – that would be… well… kinky.  
Vriska: And I just…  
Vriska: Right now I feel more comfortable with Mindfang being an archetypal cool gamblignant rather than an Ancestor with BAGGAGE, okay??!! Do you have a problem with that???!!!

* * *

**Dear Eridan: Have you heard of any seadwellers on your ship who threw fits when they found out they couldn't force a jadeblooded quadrant to come with them?**

Eridan: Threw a fit, no.  
Eridan: There’s one girl in my cohort who’s still MOPING about it, though.

* * *

**OH MY GOD EQUIUS**

Equius: It’s – it’s a classic!  
Cephal: I’m not saying it’s not a classic I’m saying the artist didn’t know anything about octopuses–  
Ananas: Cephal, sweetie, remember when we talked about tentacles in popular culture?  
Cephal: But I don’t remember there being musclebeasts in that talk.  
Naspar: (This is an example of why I don’t stop them painting over his prints.)

* * *

**It's mentioned earlier that 95% of Helm-grade Psionics are lowbloods, which implies that the other 5% are at least midbloods. Outside of trashy novels, what colour is the highest-blooded Helmsman on record? Also, have there ever been any mid- or highblood necropaths?**

Cephal: This is really, really, really rare, they made it clear we’d probably never see it – but low blue.  
Cephal: There are a fair number of browns but more rusts, mustard is highest by a lot, then there are some in the low olives but it drops off pretty steeply, so by the time you hit jade there’s nothing.  
Cephal: But it picks up again after that, just a tiny bit,m, going slowly into a little… mini-peak right at the same color as the high point for midblue psychics, and then drops off really sharply again.  
Cephal: You almost never get a blue or a teal as an actual HELMSMAN. But there are a few helmsman-grade psionics.  
Cephal: My guess would be that there have been a one or two in history up in the purple range, who were just never recorded.

Skeleton: A few. The Bureau of Retermination doesn’t recruit them.  
Skeleton: It’s an easier power to suppress than psionics, so I think many of them repress it before Conscription because it’s a lowblood thing.  
Skeleton: There aren’t any live ones in the squadron right now, but I knew a dead one who went off to explore a sun.

Skeleton: …And yes, you do sometimes get the powers expected from bluebloods and purplebloods in lowbloods.  
Skeleton: It doesn’t get recorded much.  
Skeleton: I’ve seen OBVIOUS blueblood-type psychic stuff get identified as zoopathy because the troll was a brownblood.

* * *

**Jades, you might be the ones who know this, but if any char knows the answer I'd love to know, is there a business for exporting lusii off of alternia? Like if a seadweller was governing a colony planet and wanted some familiar wildlife, or if some subjugligators wanted to start a dangerous big game ranch or whatever. Would they go to the jades for that or what?**

Oncetold: …There certainly isn’t any LEGAL business!  
Oncetold: I’m not aware of any illegal businesses jades are involved in.  
Oncetold: That doesn’t mean there isn’t something.

* * *

**Question for Equius: Who is physically stronger, tyrians, or high blues?**

Equius: Urrkk.

* * *

**Urk isn't an answer Equius! Now tell me, if the strongest full grown blue blood arm wrestled HIC, which would win?**

Equius: *urrrrrrk*  
Feferi: *sigh*  
Feferi: Bluebloods get stronger a lot faster.  
Feferi: Equius is stronger than I am.  
Feferi: But HIC is a lot older than any of the bluebloods.  
Feferi: Take it from me. She would win.

* * *

**Hey Terezi, as the highest-ranked student, did anyone ever attack you?**

Terezi: I wasn’t QUITE the highest-ranked student, just… up near the top.  
Terezi: And outright attacks are considered… hmm… gauche?  
Terezi: I did dodge several traps and sabotage attempts!  
Terezi: And even more not targeted at me in particular.  
Terezi: My favorite attempt to sabotage me was the flash grenade someone stuck in my bag just before a written test.

* * *

**I gotta know Frieas, is your video library like 90% pale porn?**

Frieas: *sleazy smile*  
Nineeyes: I think it’s not actually that high.  
Panthe: Amiety said he’s got a lot of pale porn, but what pissed her off is he’d occasionally decide he’d be great as a pale porn writer-director-star, and point to various people he saw or knew as good potential co-stars.

* * *

**ok Equius, are you sure your lusus is safe on the ship? He's very delicate and bruises like a ripe peach, the other lusii might accidentally crush him!**

Equius: Aurthour is, sadly, often quite bruised.  
Equius: However, he is in little danger of more serious injury.  
Equius: Musclebeasts are among the STRONGest lusii.  
Equius: And the most intelligent.

* * *

**Frieas there are easier ways to commit suicide than hitting on a vulnerable brain damaged purple legislacerator trainee.**

Panthe: I think he stopped listening after vulnerable.

* * *

**Hey Backwing, apart from the Sennet/Sessor clusterfuck, what was the relationship that gave you the most trouble?**

Backwing: Hesten’s situation was… painful to watch.  
Backwing: In terms of the most TROUBLE, however, it was probably a mess a while back involving all four quadrants, four different seadwellers, five of my guys, a lack of inhibitions about cheating, and way, way, WAY too much flipping.  
Backwing: I tried to resign after that one, but they wouldn’t accept it.

* * *

**What are the odds the stake through the head will awaken chucklevoodoo nonsense frias should be afraid of?**

Skaree: Laovic already had some. A lot of barbarristers do.  
Terezi: Not up to subjugglator standards, but better than Guitar Boy or, I don’t know, whatsisname, Medlai.  
Skaree: Rumor has it he hasn’t been able to use them since the… incident.

* * *

**How badly was Laovic injured by the stake-through-the-head? Did he suffer an IQ drop, or memory loss, or forget how to do things?**

Supervising Mediculler Cleancut: He can’t remember the incident itself, which is extremely frustrating to him.  
Supervising Mediculler Cleancut: There are some other odd memory gaps here and there, and he sometimes has trouble retaining information, relative to his previous capabilities.  
Supervising Mediculler Cleancut: Tremors, which he can sometimes suppress. He has trouble thinking of the words he wants, sometimes.  
Supervising Mediculler Cleancut: The inability to use his psychic powers is more of an issue than you might expect, since apparently he’s been unconsciously using the receptive part to read body language and now he has very little idea how.  
Supervising Mediculler Cleancut: Some of these will improve with time. Purples are durable, and he’s young enough to have some… room to heal.  
Supervising Mediculler Cleancut: We don't know which.

* * *

**Various old ghosts: have you ever seen your descendants?**

Alesse: Well, YES.  
Skeleton: …Possibly.  
(Karkat: I knew she was weirdly interested in that kid!)  
Truepain: Uh… possibly. Well, probably. Maybe? I don’t want to jinx anything somehow…

* * *

**Frieas, have you ever actually successfully managed to be someone's moirail in the past?**

Frieas: Of course I have!  
Nineeyes: Not since he’s been here he hasn’t.  
Takedown: What about that mechanicist who transferred to Gathering Swarm?  
Nineeyes: I think if that was a SUCCESSFUL moirallegiance it wouldn’t have fallen apart that fast.  
Giselt: He has flings. I mean… he knows all the right things to say, how to act like someone out of palerom – he’s just… also a… a… He’s someone who at least semi-seriously refers to himself as “The Great Pacificator”.  
Giselt: I don’t think there’s any way that can be a good sign, no matter how high your… aptitude is.  
Takedown: Well, I mean. Unless you were a professional. Which Frieas isn’t.

* * *

**@backwing do you have any quadrents?**

Nepeta: That is a matter of considerable speculation!  
Backwing: Really? It’s not a secret.  
Backwing: I have a pitch thing with an instructor on Brutal Domination, my moirail is in IT here, and I am – um – intermittently involved with my old matesprit who got me into this in the first place.  
Backwing: She’s in the Ruthless Regulation command structure, now, so she’s not usually here.  
Backwing: Evidently we don’t do too well if we see too much of each other, but we do okay with more distance, less commitment.

* * *

**Hey Kanaya, has anyone asked you about the Second Signless?**

Kanaya: I have had a few brief, awkward conversations with Attender Vigilant.  
Kanaya: I believe she has been running interference regarding any other Signlessists who would otherwise attempt to approach me.  
Kanaya: …  
Kanaya: Kebela has asked some, sort of – she’s invited me to talk about “my friends who died at Conscription”, rather than the Second Signless as such.  
Kanaya: But then she still claims not to actually be a believer.

* * *

**0k: has anyone ever attempted to kill one of the troublesome lusii, like the crocodile?**

Tavros: Not openly, at least not since I’ve been here?  
Tavros: Troublesome lusii, usually come with troublesome trolls.

* * *

**0k: what do bluebloods like Vriska do in the Fleet? What's their general area of expertise? (Also, what about olivebloods and non-psionic yellowbloods?)**

Panthe: I’m not sure there is one, really?  
Panthe: There’s the psycrucifiers, I think they’re almost all midblue, but they’re also small and don’t take new conscripts.  
Graywire: Yyyyyyeaahhhh, they try to ensure some… baseline stability level, as work in the psycrucifiers both requires stability and tends to make trolls notably less stable.  
Aradia: So Corpsepap was weird before she even got here? Interesting.  
Panthe: …Yeah, not sorry I missed out on that.  
Panthe: I was in threshecutioner training. Archeradicators take midblues, too.  
Skaree: You also get a lot of midblue legislacerators. Medicullers, science stuff… um… IT… higher-level admin types… navigation… standing around giving orders to lowbloods doing actual work…

Jorjel: Olives get a lot of the lower-status technical and administrative stuff.  
Niobie: Which sometimes means we do most of the work and get none of the credit.  
Jorjel: Yeah, or just… nasty jobs higher-status people don’t want to do.  
Sollux: A lot of helmstechs are olive.  
Erithe: And just… random gapfillers. Oh, that ship needs some sort of additional crew? Throw olives at it.

Takedown: Yellows are often in command, or in administration, of groups doing really menial tasks.  
Hellas: Or we can get even lower-status technical stuff. Plumbing. Replacing light fixtures.

Hellas: Anyway there is a combat division which pretty much takes ALL THE LEFTOVERS, and uses them up fast. It’s called the Boots.

* * *

**0k: I'm curious- who is the top-ranked student in Terezi's class? Also, what do barbarristers do?**

Terezi: We will find out at the end of the assessment period!  
Terezi: …It’s going to be Skaree.

Terezi: In addition to other legislacerator duties, barbarristers specialize in throwing criminals around and menacing them.  
Terezi: They’re mostly purples.  
Terezi: …Possibly all purples.  
Terezi: Actually on second thought I think barbarrister is a special high-status position for purples who want to be legislacerators.  
Terezi: But they do throw criminals around a lot.

* * *

**'Erithe: And just… random gapfillers. Oh, that ship needs some sort of additional crew? Throw olives at it.' I know you mean the color but now i'm picturing someone flicking food olives at problems and hoping it works.**

Erithe: …I suspect there are some officers here and there who’d think that was a good plan.

* * *

**0k: Turtur, if your job requires so little time, what do you do the rest of the time?**

Turtur: Besides dodging laundry ghosts?  
Turtur: I promised Cannis I’d be on my best – no, my most RULES-CONSCIOUS behavior, so it’s been a bit of a trial.  
Turtur: …Apart from all the time studying so I can actually know what I’m meant to be doing. That was an easy choice.  
Turtur: Umm, digging my way through the Fleet entertainment material, as much as I can on my budget.  
Turtur: Playing with my lusus.  
Turtur: workingontheepicTrollHowToTrainYourDragon(originalobviously)fanficI'vehadinprogressforlikethreesweeps

* * *

**Are there many positions that a Cerulean would be able to fill but a more Jade-ish Teal wouldn't? The Olive-Teal distinction is pretty clear, but it looks sort of murky at the lower end of Blue.**

Backwing: It is pretty murky. I think the threshies can get really uptight about it, though. And I think with things like archeradicators, a cerulean MIGHT get in but a teal WOULDN’T.

* * *

**Hesten, how do you feel about Mollym's revenge on Sennet?**

Hesten: She… did what I said, I guess. Didn’t let them get away with it.  
Hesten: I just… don’t care anymore.

* * *

**Karkat, have you considered haunting troll will smith? Just to see if he's as cool in person as you thought?**

Karkat: …  
Karkat: No.

* * *

**To Equius co-workers: What's the big deal about the posters? I mean they're just of types of lusus. You probably see musclebeasts walking around the ship plenty, and it's not like they wear pants.**

Naspar: …If it was just a photo of a musclebeast standing in a hallway, I don’t think anyone would be complaining. It’s not.

* * *

**Eridan: Are there any consequences for having a (fake) quadrant that's so lowblooded? Like, would it be socially acceptable for you to date an olive if you were an adult? Or is it getting a pass as a kid since she'll probably be dead before you get into real seadweller politics?**

Eridan: Uhhhh… yes and no?  
Eridan: It’s not… there aren’t any RULES about it. And a lot of the adults – I mean the older adults – will get real nostalgic about their wigglerhood lowblood or midblood sweetheart.  
Eridan: I don’t think we’re expected to break up with them or discard them.  
Eridan: We’re expected to outlive them.  
Eridan: …  
Eridan: And then getting a new lowblood quadrant would be sort of weird, since they’re so much younger.  
Eridan: …  
Eridan: At least ghosts don’t have an expiration date.

* * *

**Is there some kind of system that can let kid trolls warn if they notice dangers to alternia? (Spotting a giant meteor, alien invasion, flooding near the breeding caverns) Or are the jades responsible for that?**

Altadona: Mostly that is in the drones’ hands.  
Altadona: We… theoretically can request assistance in an emergency.  
Altadona: There is no established channel for pre-adults.

* * *

**Aradia: how many ghosts use their ghost status to just flat out stalk famous people?**

Aradia: …Lots, I’m told. Celebritrolls usually engage necropaths fairly frequently.

* * *

**dear necropaths: Alternia has undead zombies right? Are there any ghosts that saw themselves become zombies?**

Aradia: Yes!  
Aradia: Those are the lucky ones.  
Aradia: You know how most undead are, you know, basically trolls plus fungus?  
Aradia: They aren’t all DEAD as such. Most of them aren’t dead in a way that sets loose a ghost.  
Aradia: A few of the less horrific varieties cause brain death early on and you get a ghost trailing after an undead in horrified fascination, but mostly…  
Aradia: You get the ghost when you kill the undead.  
Aradia: Generally a hysterically screaming ghost trying to claw themself open to “get it out”.  
Aradia: Psychics – necropaths and purple-types especially, but zoopaths and midblue-types to some extent – can often… fling themselves out of their bodies, before the undead is destroyed.  
Aradia: They still end up hysterical, but not quite as bad.

Sollux: You think that’s fun, try hearing an imminently deceased undead.  
Sollux: You’ve got a weirdly hypnotic FEED SPREAD SUN SPREAD SURVIVE-FOR-NOW SPREAD on repeat, sometimes in a duet with sustained screaming or whimpering.

* * *

**dear ok jades: Is there any genre of films/books/comics of "boys who would get classified as jades if they weren't boys, crossdressing and having rediculous cavern antics as they try to hide their identity"? Or vice verse jade girls pretending to be dudes to get in the fleet?**

Ashtar: Hestai is writing some, I think!  
Perses: …That aside, not really. The brooding caverns are really secretive, and promote the whole… reverent attitude. I don’t know of any mass media fiction set here.  
Perses: Even though it would make a good setting for a sitcom.  
Ashtar: It really, really would.  
(Oncetold: There ARE instances where individuals logged as male on cavern exit report as female at Conscription, and are classified as jade then when they weren’t before. And some in reverse, I assume.  
Oncetold: But they aren’t in disguise, just… reclassified.  
Oncetold: I guess it’s possible to lie about it at Conscription to get where you want to go? But I don’t think many people do. It’s intimidating, and you do not get a chance to change your mind.)

* * *

**Jades on survey duty: How often do you run into pre-adults while checking on the wild Lusii? Even staying away from population centers and working mostly during the day, there have to have been some encounters.**

Chidan: It happens. They usually run away fast even if Rothah doesn’t have her flamethrower out.  
Chidan: I can hardly blame them.  
Ashtar: Maybe… once every few weeks, on average?  
Ashtar: Not including the time we walked right into the Arachnofair Music Festival and scared the crap out of a couple hundred fans.  
Chidan: Fell.  
Ashtar: What?  
Chidan: You FELL into the ravine with the music festival.  
Ashtar: Whatever, it still shouldn’t be in the average.

* * *

**0k: have any of you ever known anyone who said the wrong thing and got disappeared for it?**

Truepain: Besides me, you mean?  
Truepain: Signlessists disappear, because they don’t want to give us a platform. I think a lot of others go to ‘public example’.

* * *

**Aradia: Get asked to clear out a celibritrolls ghost problem (Karkat: Tag along)**

Karkat: One, I’m not there right now.  
Karkat: Two, I don’t think our squadron has any A-List celebritrolls.  
Karkat: Or B-List.  
Karkat: Maybe some Z-List.  
Aradia: 0u0

* * *

**Do lusii that get left on Alternia understand why they were left?**

Tavros: Some of them do?  
Tavros: Some of them are pretty sad and confused.  
Tavros: The good news is, the ones who don’t understand, usually move on pretty fast? They don’t, dwell on it.

* * *

**So with the unsurity between caste lines...has there ever been an heiress misidentified as violet? If so, how was it when the lusus came to pick her up?**

Altadona: No, there has not.  
Altadona: There have been a few cases that had everyone fretting that this might be the time, though – very high female violets – but none of them were quite tyrian, and the lusus didn’t show up for any of them.

* * *

**How did that one Indigo who survived Overbear find out that the adorable cat pun olive was involved with his latest target?**

Caviah: I was her immediate supervisor at the time.  
Caviah: And they aren’t… exactly subtle.

* * *

**"Caviah: And they aren’t… exactly subtle" Well now I have to ask, Nepeta and Equius, what kind of pale pda's were you guys pulling?**

Nepeta: *rolls eyes*  
Nepeta: I THINK she means AC would TALK about her meowrail since she didn’t know if any reason not to.

* * *

**Nepeta seemed less than forthcoming. Can her or Equiu's co-workers tell me if they were having adorable young pale moments they didn't realize everyone picked up on?**

Naspar: It was nothing improper.  
Naspar: She would stop by to say hello when she was off duty.  
Naspar: He would make small gifts for her from leftover materials.  
Gathay: And they’d make goo-goo eyes at each other.  
Rayshe: Make more puns than should probably be allowed.  
Naspar: So, nothing improper, just… also not subtle.

* * *

**Do lowblooded trolls going into military positions ever get to take their lusii with them if they're useful in a fight?**

Skeleton: Some rounds of Conscription, but not as often as they used to.  
Skeleton: I think the change is largely because it’s some distance before you get to any ground combat.

* * *

**Do troll tabloids get into Her Imperious Condescensions quadrants? Or do they know better than to gossip in ways she may find objectionable?**

Feferi: Sometimes, apparently, because sometimes she thinks it’s funny.  
Feferi: Other times she doesn’t think it’s funny and will cull the tabloid staff.  
Feferi: The most recent one I saw had some blurry pictures of someone too short to be the Condesce with a fuschia scarf.  
Feferi: No idea if there’s any truth to it.

* * *

**Can anyone in 0k tell us about what HIC gets up to for fun? (Or can we get amusing rumors about what she gets up to?)**

Skeleton: Besides all the alien-baiting, I understand she enjoys coming up with premises for, dictating the production of, and then watching reality shows.  
Skeleton: There’s a new run of “Survivor” whenever she comes up with a new gimmick.  
Skeleton: I had to clean up after one of those, when I was alive. Some very on-edge ghosts.  
Skeleton: Not as on-edge as the winner, though. He was a wreck.  
Skeleton: But I digress. She’s supposed to be very proud of her baking, so I expect she does sometimes. She’s said to attend some subjugglator performances.  
Skeleton: I don’t have any firsthand observation here.

* * *

**hey, have nep and Equ done the equivalent of marry their high school sweet heart by having a quadrant last not only the grub years but also conscription and then being separated once more? Like if they haven't split over that then no one ever expects them to? Is that common or uncommon?**

Backwing: Maintaining a quadrant through conscription isn’t terribly unusual – especially the conciliatory ones, which are a bit simpler to do remotely.  
Backwing: I generally estimate relationship longevity based on how the people are acting now, and how they acted in the past if I know that – not just a number.  
Backwing: But from just seeing half of it, yes, Nepeta’s diamond looks to be in excellent condition.

* * *

**To the jades: have any of you ever let a grub with any kind of mutation or flaw (apart from the Second Sufferer, obviously) go unculled because you felt sorry for it?**

Maltha: OF COURSE NOT!  
Perses: (notinfrontofMalthaplease)  
Perses: *after Maltha leaves* …Sort of?  
Perses: I don’t think anyone would be surprised to hear I’m not the most… attentive culler on duty. And grubs sort of blur together. I’m sure there are physical mutations that have gotten past me without my noticing.  
Perses: If I do notice… sorry for them how? If they’re in pain, or struggling to make it… Sometimes I’ve just let those pass with the reasoning they’ll never make it out of the Trials anyway, but that’s not something I feel good about.  
Perses: Past the Trials is a different story, I feel justified letting about anything go then. Obviously they’re fit enough.  
Surewait: …Once or twice I’ve jumped injured or otherwise impaired grubs past the Trials, so they have a chance to recover. Strictly to meet quotas, if anyone asks.

* * *

**0k: Feferi, if you had the option to, would you haunt/give ghostly advice to the next Fushia heiress if you thought it would help her prepare for her duel with/or possible rule as the Empress?**

Feferi: Yes.  
Feferi: Starting early. Make sure she… understands about how everyone’s life is important. Other stuff the Empress doesn’t seem to get.  
Feferi: And about what she could be dealing with as Empress if she wins.  
Feferi: And how to win.  
Feferi: I understand I’m… sort of an anomaly, for Heiresses? But I don’t think I need to be.  
Feferi: It’s not like I’d be alone.  
Feferi: Having Gl'bgolyb as a lusus is already really weird, having a terrifying ghost army as a second lusus isn’t that much weirder.  
Feferi: 8)

* * *

**Kanaya, do you know if the fleet employs 'ash for hire' people to prevent things like the seadweller ship freakout?**

Kanaya: I have no idea?  
Backwing: There ARE ashen professionals available, but they don’t do a damn bit of good if the people aren’t willing to be auspisticized.

* * *

**Did any other Heiresses manage to escape getting dispelled? Are any of them around at all?**

Skeleton: Not that I’ve encountered.

_(Authorial aside: there is at least one, the one the Demoness blew up during the Challenge. She stays exclusively on the Battleship Condescension, though, which dead necropaths tend to avoid since the Demoness is there so much, so Skeleton doesn’t know about her.)_

* * *

**So jades, purple landdweller grubs sometimes get hints of earfins, but what about rust land-dwellers? Any hints the spectrum might be more a circle than a line with some hint of earfin red grubs?**

Perses: …Not that I’ve ever seen.  
Perses: And I don’t think there’s anything in the guidelines about that?  
Perses: How long would this hypothetical earfin-rustblood live?

* * *

**Frieas, how are you ever going to reach troll serendipity if your pale quadrant is always temporary?**

Frieas: Serendipity’s for suckers.  
Frieas: It’s a myth, is what I mean.

* * *

**0k: Karkat, would YOU ever act as a guardian for any potential mutants you stumble across if you could?**

Karkat: …  
Karkat: …  
Karkat: …  
Karkat: …  
Karkat: maybe  
Karkat: if they had somewhere to go I’d help get them past that comedy act of a quality control process  
Karkat: no blood could be more disgusting than that process is stupid

* * *

**Hey Equius, why didn't you try to become a RUFFIANNIHILATOR when the ARCHERADICATOR thing didn't work out?**

Equius: While I would of course have accepted that posting if assigned to it, it was not of… particular interest to me. I am pleased to have my engineering skills found of use.  
Equius: …I would not have enjoyed being a ruffiannihilator.  
(Nepeta: Also OVERBEAR was a ruffiannihilator.)

* * *

**Does the Demoness have any ghost allies who help her out?**

Skeleton: Allies implies some level of equality, so no.  
Skeleton: I wouldn’t rule out her sometimes having minions.

* * *

**So... what exactly does Scavenge get up to that's so shady?**

Aradia: Okay, so, highbloods are “supposed” to be able to just ignore ghosts. Not necessarily while they’re on duty, but in their personal quarters or something, they “should” be able to just deal.  
Aradia: Being afraid of ghosts is for wishy-washy midbloods and low blues.  
Aradia: So, while a teal or olive or even a seadweller can submit a request to have the Bureau clear some non-duty area out – it goes into a queue, with an order based on both blood color and number of people affected – a high blue or purple who did that would NEVER live it down.  
Aradia: But, since most highbloods cannot in fact endure indefinite levels of haunting, they will hire necropaths under the table. Payment is sometimes in caegars but often in luxury goods.  
Aradia: Scavenge has a well-coordinated ghost entourage which he powers up himself. He identifies a mark, and they make DAMN SURE the mark wants that haunting gone.  
Aradia: Scavenge arrives to save the day and collect the payment.

* * *

**0k: What if the Empress suddenly died with no heiress to take her place? Would the empire break out into an all-out civil war? And how does the Empress actually rule her empire beyond conquest?**

Skeleton: To be quite honest I think it might be a while before anyone noticed.  
Skeleton: If the crew on her ship tried to cover it up it could be sweeps.  
Skeleton: When it did get out – there’s no reason things couldn’t continue on as they have been, but I don’t think they would.  
Skeleton: My guess is you’d see some squadrons cutting ties and trying to make it on their own – some ships, even.  
Skeleton: Other squadrons would split between seadweller-controlled and highblood-controlled. They’d probably start fighting over control of the homeworld.  
Skeleton: It’d be a disaster.  
Skeleton: …For trolls. Not so much for alien planets she hadn’t gotten around to visiting.

* * *

**Frieas, can the great pacificator give us some advice on calming highbloods? What are your favorite moves to bust out?**

Frieas: *smarmy smile*  
Frieas: *eyebrow waggling*

* * *

**Is Frieas actually...having any success with stake-through-the-head dude, or is there a betting pool on how long before this blows up in his face?**

Terezi: Well… yes, weirdly enough.  
Terezi: Laovic seems less frantic?  
Terezi: I’m not sure if he hasn’t noticed how… patronizing Frieas can get, or he doesn’t mind because it’s because he’s a highblood, not because of the brain injury.  
Terezi: And the situation does not depend on what performance level Laovic can attain.

Tavros: And, YES, definitely.  
Tavros: Unfortunately, it’s just times? Not conditions, like, if he gets his psychic powers back, or, if someone spills it to the purple.  
Tavros: I have, half a sweep.

* * *

**0k question, does HIC ever star in movies or anything?**

Skeleton: Yes, sometimes.  
Skeleton: It seems like she’ll get in the mood for it every few hundred sweeps, and do some movies – two, five, a dozen, it varies.  
Skeleton: Everything from starring roles to cameos, sometimes in things she wrote herself, sometimes in things she ordered to be written, sometimes in movies she strolled into and announced she’d be taking some role.  
Skeleton: When she gets in one of these moods all the movie critics just quit and go to some other field.

* * *

**Anyone in 0k: What's the etiquette for using mind powers on others in the fleet? I know in homestuck equius said he could tell when vriska tried to get in his head, is that a highblood thing or can most trolls tell if someone's rooting around in there? If so is there a lot of danger in using those powers willy nilly because someone might take it the wrong way and kill you for the intrusion?**

Bluemind: Ummmmm…  
Jannin: *facepalm*  
Cirrus: Don’t take me as an absolute authority on this – I ended up with a quadrant-based assignment instead of the psycrucifiers, not that I’m complaining about that, so while I’m considered pretty good I’m NOT trained to the fullest extent possible.  
Cirrus: A REALLY GOOD psychic can get in the head of just about anyone who doesn’t also have some form of mental powers without their noticing. Less-skilled midblue-types and zoopaths you can sometimes sneak past, but necropaths and chucklevoodoo-types are NOT RECOMMENDED.  
Cirrus: The exceptions – non-psychics who are just really resistant for some reason – are usually high blues and standard-and-above seadwellers. (Which probably includes tyrian, not that I’d suggest anyone test that.) And sometimes low olives, apparently. And it seems to usually increase with age.  
Cirrus: The less skilled the psychic, the more likely it is that they’ll be noticed. You can still try to brute-force control or information extraction, if that’s your thing and you have the raw power, but the same resistance rules apply there.  
Cirrus: So… yes, you shouldn’t just run around using powers without careful consideration.  
Panthe: What I was told unofficially when I arrived was that until I knew how things worked, I should never try to use my powers on anyone older than me or up-spectrum of me.  
[Various people]: *eying Vriska*  
Vriska: What?!  
Erithe: I don’t think you tried to use your powers on the recon ship crew while you were alive, did you?  
Vriska: I couldn’t fucking touch anyone but Shredear, and he’d always notice and then Sharpwit or Scanfire would do something extra nasty to me.  
Vriska: Damphand was easy, though.

* * *

**Relating to the last ask: Do those resistant to psychics often find themselves being their workplaces unofficial liaisons to places where pyshics are likely to be? (Like legislacerators making contacts among mid blue organizations or something may specifically send those who are resist so as not to lose ahold of any secrets)**

Sharpeye: Oh, yes.  
Sharpeye: Not necessarily to any group containing midblues – there are a lot of midblues who aren’t anything to worry about, you just need mental discipline.  
Sharpeye: But if we have to deal with anyone noted to be psychic, or if we have to deal with the psycrucifiers, then we pull from our more resistant people.  
Sharpeye: Which includes indigos, but also our own midblue-type psychics and – among the barbarristers – purple-type psychics.

* * *

**How many misunderstandings are there among new recruits when highbloods use their ridiculous snobbish vernacular that isn't as descriptive as lowblood talk?**

Sharpeye: Hardly any, I think.  
Sharpeye: There’s usually someone more experienced around to clarify.  
Sharpeye: When there aren’t more experienced people around, conscripts are usually sorted by caste, so…

* * *

**0k: do people ever get critically depressed from going from Alternia to ships and knowing that they'll never see home or live on a planet again?**

[Everyone who has to deal with new conscripts]: YES.  
Cleancut: Sometimes there are also physiological effects.  
Backwing: Altogether it’s called transition sickness. The phenomenon is widespread enough it’s… un-ignorable. Even lowbloods get access to some simulated planetary environment zones. Not always a lot of access, but some.  
Sharpeye: If that’s insufficient, people can be prescribed chemical supplements which do apparently kick-start some stuff that would happen naturally on-planet? I’m not very clear on what exactly.  
Sharpeye: Of course then some people never stop taking them, but, well, I don’t think it does any harm.

* * *

**0k ask: Is going to a therapist voluntarily acceptable? Or does that show weakness/trip on pale territory?**

Sharpeye: Going to a mediculler mind specialist is a gamble.  
Sharpeye: They might conduct treatment and declare you fixed, and that’s fine, except for some of the more, er, ostentatiously tough highbloods.  
Sharpeye: They might say you’re perfectly functional and don’t need any treatment, and maybe you’re a hypochondriac but whatever.  
Sharpeye: The thing is they’re still mediCULLERS, and if they decide you’re not functional and not fixable they can order you culled, and your superior has to move fast if they want to overrule it.  
Sharpeye: I wouldn’t recommend it unless you can pick the specialist and have reason to think they won’t write you off. It’s safer to get a moirail.

* * *

**0k Terezi (or other legislacerators): Because I'm interested - how does inheritance law work, in Alternian society? If a highblood dies, do things get divided up among their quadrants according to a specific order? Do lowblooded quadrants get to keep anything that's expensive, or do they risk someone taking it off them?**

Backwing: If a highblood leaves a will, it’s followed – or supposed to be followed. Sometimes a higher-blood or superior officer will step in and overrule it, but that’s considered rude and also courting irate ghosts.  
Bonebelt: It does court irate ghosts. Completely unrelated ghosts will show up if the deceased isn’t around.  
Backwing: If there isn’t a will, the quadrants are default heirs, but protocol gets… complicated. It’s a combination of caste and quadrant and relative duration of quadrant.  
Backwing: Moirail and middle leaf, if they had one, have a right to offer their opinions on appropriate disposition no matter what, but it’s not binding.  
Backwing: Higher-blooded quadrants get priority over lower-blooded quadrants if there’s at least two steps between them. But all quadrants get keepsakes, no matter how low they are.  
Backwing: The kismesis traditionally gets to go grab whatever they can carry in the number of minutes equal to the natural logarithm of the sweeps of the relationship, the moirail and matesprit are expected to discuss things reasonably…  
Backwing: It can get confusing.  
Backwing: Make a will.

* * *

**CM: What are some of your favorite songs to hear and/or play? Do you have any songs that you are absolutely sick of hearing or getting requests for?**

Chidro: Well, not to sound too full of myself, I like playing my own stuff without worrying about censors or propagandart rules or… whatever.  
Chidro: And anything by The Mayflies.  
Chidro: As for things I absolutely will not play…  
Chidro: Okay, so when I was a finalist on Alternia’s Got Talent, they had some request episodes, right? Viewers sent in requests for contestants.  
Chidro: And something went… I don’t know what went wrong with mine. Maybe someone was screwing with me. But I get up there and get the request list and it’s just…  
Chidro: It’s ‘Status Report, Meowbeast’ over and over and over and over and over again. Almost the whole time.  
Chidro: …I’m not certain it’s why I didn’t win, but I might not have voted for me after having to listen to that.  
Chidro: …Still better off than the guy who was REQUESTED to juggle live scorpions for two hours, though.  
Chidro: He died.  
Chidro: Anyway, request episodes are a terrible idea, and that song is banished from my repertoire forever.

* * *

**Tavros: With your living conditions being communal, and presumably a lot of young hot blooded trolls..ever walk in on someone in an embarrassing position?**

Tavros: Not as often, as you might think?  
Tavros: Since it is communal, and there’s no pretense of privacy, people are usually pretty good about checking out a lowblood concupiscenceblock.  
Tavros: Even though they get sort of gross.  
Tavros: I’ve had to clean them.

* * *

**Anyone in ok: Expound on troll halloween. Do you dress up as ghosts to fool the demoness from attacking you? Are there differen't traditions among highbloods than lowbloods? Do the people who give the best candy get good luck for the sweep?**

Karkat: You mean the holiday when people dress up like corpses and try to break into their neighbors’ hives and steal their stuff?

* * *

**0k kids: So now I gotta know, who's been in a simulated planetary enviroment zone, who has access to them, and what are they like?**

Sollux: I haven’t, everyone else has.  
Sollux: I’ve seen the specs, I don’t think I’m missing much.  
Aradia: You wouldn’t think you were missing much if it was ACTUALLY OUTSIDE.  
Sollux: …Fair enough.  
Aradia: They vary a lot, ship to ship. Some are really shitty, some are full of lusii–  
Sollux: –and therefore shitty in a completely different way–  
Aradia: Some you even need a mediculler’s note to get into.  
Aradia: Enthusiastic Violence’s has healthy plants, but they’re too… manicured for me.  
Sollux: Unrelenting Persecution has a fake river which is always breaking down.  
Terezi: GIANT. CROCODILE.

* * *

**So... why *does* Perses keep taking her gloves off when she handles grubs?**

Perses: *shifty eyes*  
Maltha: She doesn’t take her gloves off to handle grubs.  
Maltha: She takes her gloves off to mess around on her palmhusk WHEN SHE IS SUPPOSED TO BE WORKING and then doesn’t have time to put them on when she ends up handling grubs.

* * *

**0k: Skeleton, what's your backstory? How did you die?**

Skeleton: Oh, nothing very exciting.  
Skeleton: Blood vessel in the thinkpan burst while I was asleep.  
Skeleton: Almost embarrassing, really.

* * *

**0k: Feferi, now that you've been dead for awhile, what are the first changes you'd enact if you had become Empress? Everyone else, what job would you want to have if you had a choice?**

Feferi: Whale, knowing everything I know now, starting somewhere I’d get minimal pushback… Drop the quotas for wiggler production, way down, and reallocate resources to improve conditions for all of the reduced number of kids.  
Feferi: And raise Conscription age. By like five sweeps. Raise it more later.  
Feferi: After that maybe I could maybe look into ways to reduce Fleet size… see if there are planets people could get settled in… Need more research.

* * *

**Feferi: Would it be that hard to shrink the fleet? Just make the focus colonizing the planets you already conquered and building shit there, you still only have one planet outputting population so turning so many planets into colonies will spread the fleet population super thing.**

Feferi: The problem would be shrinking it without people realizing you’re shrinking it.

* * *

**Why does feferi want to raise the Conscription age**

Feferi: Because we weren’t glubbing old enough to be thrown in… that.  
Feferi: …Plus, it’s a long game. Just keep raising it, slowly, shrink the Fleet without anyone noticing… Well, that’s probably too much to hope for.  
Feferi: But I think we should be able to give people at least another five sweeps on planet, if we lower the pressure!

* * *

**0k: Feferi, but wouldn't that mean that there would be more dangerous adults stuck on a planet full of kids? Why not reform the conscription process itself to be less stressful/dangerous?**

Feferi: No! It would mean that there are young adults just a sweep older than the others on a planet full of kids.  
Feferi: And then two sweeps older, but there’d be another brood just below them, so really, there’s not a big gap.  
Feferi: And the idea is, by the time they realize they’re adults before they ever leave the planet, they’ll be used to – never starting to act like dangerous adults! Never seeing the pre-adults as something different and lesser than them.  
Feferi: You’d still have to have the drones keep an eye out for anyone who gets the bright idea to take advantage of their size and strength, but hopefully they’d be way outnumbered.

* * *

**0k: are there any secret limebloods among the cast? or does anyone in the cast know any secret limebloods?**

Backwing: Of course not, limebloods are an offense against decency and anyone would be morally obliged to report them immediately.  
Backwing: …That said. There are illegal recreational drugs which can, as a side effect, mess with your blood color. There’s someone here a bit older than me, a seadweller’s matesprit, who is using those illegal recreational drugs, facilitated by his matesprit. He’s officially olive. He might be olive. I assume he’s olive. The evidence would be the same if he… weren’t.

Captain Farsight: Haha, of course not – why do you ask?  
Sharpwit and Shredear: *close ranks around Scanfire*

* * *

**Karkat, did you consider using any of those recreational drugs that can change your blood?**

Karkat: …  
Karkat: Fucking shit.  
Karkat: WHY DIDN’T I KNOW ABOUT THAT?!  
Skeleton: Well, even if you had known, you would still have had to afford a steady supply, and then meet performance standards while on some fairly hard drugs, for however long it took to land an isolated posting.  
Skeleton: It wouldn’t have been a magic fix-it, is what I’m saying.


	266. ==> BE SHREDEAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: 0K: Hey, team murder recon, how are you doing since you all got busted?

==> BE SHREDEAR

The upside of the ‘murder recon’ story spreading all over is no one is shocked when Sharpwit sets up an illicit drug lab in the dry-engineering bay where you work. You’re both known to blithely tromp over… whatever, whoever to get what you want. Why wouldn’t you start a drug lab to get some extra caegars? No one wonders why. They demand bribes to keep quiet and/or to be cut in on it, but they don’t ask why.

And the upside of being in the squadron is that sensor work just isn’t very urgent, or exciting, and if Scanfire’s performance isn’t really up to standards while she gets used to being on the hard stuff again, it doesn’t really matter.

Things could be a lot worse.

You still hate everything and fantasize about killing your coworkers at least twice a day.


	267. ==> BE (VERY) PAST SHREDEAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we see Team Murder Recon's initial reactions to finding out that Scanfire is a limeblood?

==> BE (VERY) PAST SHREDEAR

Your name is Lycaen Aurcle and you are three sweeps old and your bestest friends in the world (besides your lusus) live close enough that you can walk there safe by yourself to see them! Their names are Ophrya and Pahhur and they only have one lusus, and she has blood like Ophrya’s and not like Pahhur’s, but that just means Rattlermom picked Pahhur SPECIALLY.

Today Pahhur knocks on the door of your hive by herself. She’s been crying.

You let her in right away. “Do I need to club someone?” You aren’t very good with your club yet but you smashed a melon. “Is Ophrya okay?”

“I’m mad at Ophrya because she’s pretending nothing’s wrong,” Pahhur says. “Have you started the schoolfeeding on the hemospectrum?”

“…Sort of.” You were supposed to at least.

“They talked about my blood. Lime blood.”

“Did they say why you don’t have a–”

“They said I was an abodimation. Or something. Cull on sight.”

“We won’t let anybody cull you! Not EVER! Even if your blood color’s… stuff.” You frown. “Ophrya wouldn’t either.”

“I think she thinks she can fix it. I think she’d get in trouble if she tried.”

“Well… we won’t ever let anything happen to her, either!”

Pahhur smiles a tiny bit. “Or to you, even if you skip your schoolfeeding.”


	268. ==> BE TEREZI [being helpful]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: How goes the investigation of spike through the head kid?

==> BE TEREZI

The sensible thing to do when you hear scuffling noises and something slamming against the wall in the corridor outside your block is to lock the door. The LEGISLACERATOR thing to do is to poke your head out and take a look. Or smell, as the case may be.

Another sabotage attempt from Pappad, looks like. A small canister has half fallen out of the equipment bag he dropped on the floor.

You tsk. “Mr. Pappad, I HOPE you weren’t planning to gas my respiteblock. It would be VERY vexing of you!”

Pappad makes a gurgling noise, and his heels drum against the wall.

“Pappad LIKES gassing people,” Laovic says, teeth bared. “If he tells me what his sources are, he might even live to gas again.”

Ah. Laovic must have been gassed so they could get him into position. “Well, best of luck with that! Though it might go better if you stopped choking him.”


	269. ==> BE GATHAY CALLEA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Equius: Give new friends? tips on robot fighting as you bare handedly beat the snot out of one of their robots.

==> BE GATHAY CALLEA

The chassis goes *crunch* and DefendBot XIII topples over.

Komlee sighs heavily, much less put out than he would be if IX weren’t already half-built. “We’re supposed to have the robots fight EACH OTHER, Zahhak, not break them OURSELVES.”

“He doesn’t have his own finished yet, let him do it this way,” Rayshe says. “Sign we need to make them stronger, I guess.”

“He’s HIGH BLUE, they’re not going to–”

You clear your throat. “No opinion on this, but if you do fight my DeathBot, don’t hit it in the torso like that, okay?”

Zahhak blinked a few times, but he’s not stupid. “Weren’t you specifically prohibited from incorporating disintegration rays in any future projects?

“Well, theoretically, yeah.”


	270. ==> BE PAST BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Some highblood: Find out about your ancestor from their famously bad high budget/production value terrible writing self produced movie, rather than their years of successful military service

==> BE PAST BRIATE MEDLAI

You stare at the screen long after it goes blank.

Taggue pats your shoulder awkwardly. “There, there.” There’s a scuffle, which is probably her poking Cappul behind your back.

Cappul tries, “It wasn’t… THAT bad.”

“It was that bad,” Taggue says.

“You’re the one who wanted me to be comforting.”

“Be comforting, not lie through your teeth.”

“Because you were doing such a good job–”

You have to abandon your horror to break up the building argument. So that’s something.

…You wouldn’t be quite as horrified if your ancestor's self-produced movie weren’t a terribly-written, terribly-acted ASHEN ROMCOM.


	271. ==> BE THE ALTADONA OF THE BROODING CAVERNS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Could we get a POV of the altadonna after the whole mess went down?

==> BE THE ALTADONA OF THE BROODING CAVERNS

You close the door of your suite behind you and lean on it for a moment. Deep breath. Let go of Serene Unflappable Altadona face, let out a little of the fear and horror and shock. Your hands start trembling.

You kind of want to up the sopor in your recuperacoon, but not enough to take the risk of being difficult to wake. You’re not going to consider this crisis TRULY over until the new mother grub starts laying, if you can even manage it then. But at least ghosts are no longer fighting over killing you all.

(The necropath ghost didn’t actually tell you that some of the problem ghosts wanted to kill both mother grubs, but you’ve seen more than a few of your people get desperate and self-destructive, and becoming ghosts likely wouldn’t help with that, for some of them. There’s probably nothing like killing yourself to get a little *peace*, and then ending up stuck in the same place with no known way to leave.)


	272. ==> BE KANAYA [marveling]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: POV: Kanaya, hold the baby mother grub for the first time

==> BE KANAYA

She’s so beautiful.

“Good, good,” Wisehand murmurs. “Pick her up – I want to check her underthorax.”

You obey quickly – she’s much heavier than the Matriorb was, but you’re stronger now, too. Her eyes open briefly, and you think she might be looking at you.

She’s so perfect.


	273. ==> BE ALCYON SOLDIE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Eridan: Make a pale move???

==> BE ALCYON SOLDIE

You’re in line at the lunchroom, getting honeyed locusts again, because they’re Trisyn’s favorite, even though you still hate them and never choke down more than a quarter of what you take.

Much to your surprise, Ampora actually talks to you as you move away from the foodplatform. (Mostly people avoid you as “too mopey”.) “I know this probably doesn’t help right now, but it does get better with time. And your girl is fine, isn’t she?”

Right. Ampora was hung up on the late Heiress. You guess he’d know about loss.

You just shrug.


	274. ==> BE EQUIUS [failing to find words]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Pov of Equius after the overbear stuff, personally thanking people? It'd be kinda interesting to see not in the chatroom but just personal thank yous to those who did so much (especially aradia, sollux, and terezi)

==> BE EQUIUS

It feels like there are some things which it is impossible to adequately express gratitude for. This is one of those things.

You try to at least troll Pyrope – she’s a high midblood, it should be easier, but you still lose your nerve at the last moment and somehow end up calling your auspistice instead.

You want to thank them all personally, if not in person, but it just keeps… not happening.


	275. ==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Be BRIATE MEDLAI and finally catch A BREAK

==> BE BRIATE MEDLAI

You’re staring at a hardcopy of the duty roster, trying to figure out why Backwing set it up the way she did, when Cirrus strides up to the table towing a vaguely familiar newbie with a teal sign on his jacket.

“Hippus, you’ve seen Briate Medlai. Briate, this is Pegaus Hippus. He just broke up with his moirail. I think you two should talk.”


	276. ==> BE ANCILLAR ONCETOLD

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: POV: Jadebloods in the caverns, planning for the festivities??? (And very quietly maybe trying to work some sufferist stuff into the celebrations?)

==> BE ANCILLAR ONCETOLD

So, flags with the HEMOSPECTRUM colors down one side of the corridor, and flags with the VISIBLE LIGHT spectrum down the other.

It’s amazing how many people in the caverns get really into the visible light spectrum.

Before you can finish, there’s a shriek from the novitiates’ quarters. It sounds like Fialle.

“Holy SHIT Ashtar where do you even get these things?!”

Ten to one she’s got pyrotechnics under her bunk somehow.


	277. ==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Naspar: Behold the giant robot mother grub

==> BE WENNAM NASPAR

You knew something was going on from the drastic drop in efficiency at ASSIGNED TASKS. You were not expecting to walk into the spare-parts block and find… THIS.

“What,” you manage.

“It’s for the holiday,” Callea says. “It’s going to fight and destroy enemy robots. Well, mock-enemies."

“You,” you say. “That. You.”

“Awww, you’ll hurt her feelings!”


	278. ==> BE AURICH FRIEAS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: PoV from Frieas about how he feels about his newish diamond?

==> BE AURICH FRIEAS

Lagust is usually pretty easy to steer, which is a good thing. When he gets his headaches, he really just wants to curl up and let someone else make all the decisions, which is excellent. You take good care of him.

Of course, when he’s on the trail of whoever attacked him, he won’t listen to a damn thing you say.


	279. ==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: CANNIS SKAREE: Talk to TEREZI.

==> BE CANNIS SKAREE

You’ve been training yourself to stop jerking awake whenever Pyrope comes into the block, because you more or less trust her and you need the sleep. But this time, you had something to tell her, so you did wake up! Sometimes these things work just right.

“Pyrope, have you heard about the latest Laovic development?”

“Nothing since he almost killed Pappad,” she replies brightly. “What’s up?”

“He says he’s solved the case, and wants to present it as an exhibition piece during the festivities.” Which, if it went well, would cement his future in the legislacerators.

Pyrope nods. “Even though it has nothing whatsoever to do with the Mother Grub.”

“Yeah, I don’t think he’s even paying attention to that part. He hasn’t gotten approval yet, but if he does, other trainees will probably be, ah, ~invited~ to do exhibition pieces.” Which is QUITE likely to include both of you.

“I SEE.”

“I’ve been doing some research,” you indicate the computer you fell asleep on. “For students in good standing an exhibition would need to be disastrous to really get them in real trouble. But it doesn’t hurt to prepare.”

“Certainly not!” Pyrope agrees, and grins.


	280. Q&A X

**Genuinely curious- how do those blood colour altering drugs work? Do they just turn your blood a different shade, or can they do whole colours?**

Sharpwit: It’s easiest and safest to just shift the shade.  
Sharpwit: You CAN get all sorts of interesting colors, but that’s a lot more likely to have lethal side effects, and even if they don’t, the non-lethal side effects are more… difficult to function with.

* * *

**What is the significance of a troll having a The title when an adult?**

Jannin Lepsir: Titles are EARNED, not chosen. Anyone can pick an adult name, but other people have to agree you should have a title.

* * *

**Has there ever been official requests to dispel the Demoness? Could it be done?**

Bonebelt: *spits drink all over table*  
Bonebelt: …Not in living memory, there haven’t been. The Demoness is a… a legend. More than a myth, but..  
Bonebelt: No. That’s not something anyone would think is possible.

Skeleton: I think… I don’t think the Demoness is by nature un-dispellable.  
Skeleton: It would just take more power than any hundred – any THOUSAND – live necropaths, and she’d un-dispel herself inside a sweep. At the outside.

* * *

**Dear ok cast: Have there ever been cases where a whole ship has gotten shipments of tainted sopor or food supplies and it resulted in the ship getting destroyed? (Or at least the whole ship having crazy drugged shenanigans)**

Sharpeye: Yes. More than once. Under the previous supplyczar on Gathering Swarm, it was… fairly common. He went to trial for it – I was in on the inquisitorment. All of those were small ships, of course.  
Sharpeye: Larger ships are rarer, and nothing’s happened in this squadron, while I’ve been here. But it does happen sometimes.

* * *

**To the robot building crew: What's the weirdest request for a prosthetic a troll has ever asked you guys for?**

Naspar: *violent cringe*  
Rayshe: I think he’s having flashbacks. Not that I blame him.  
Komlee: It was three sets of PROSTHETIC DUCKLUSUS GENITALIA.  
Gathay: Only one of which was sized for the ducklusus.  
Gathay: And I mean, none of our business, right?  
Rayshe: But the MENTAL IMAGES.

* * *

**To the necropaths: What's the oldest ghost you've been requested to bring up?**

Bonebelt: We don’t generally get asked to bring ghosts up – we’re officially ReTERMINATION, all about putting ghosts down.

* * *

**....Three duckbeast prosthetics? I can sort of see there being some people who would want one but why three?**

Gathay: …I suppose one was for a friend and one was for an actual duckbeast?  
Gathay: We didn’t want to ask.

* * *

**Necropaths: Have you ever been called to get rid of a ghost, realize when you get there it's the demoness, and have to haul ass away?**

Bonebelt: Not personally.  
Bonebelt: I understand that if you get close enough to identify her, you usually die.

Skeleton: Not usually – sometimes she likes to leave witnesses. Just often.

* * *

**What would the Demoness make of Aradia if she knew about her? Are there any other descendants of the Demoness out there?**

Skeleton: No idea whatsoever.  
Skeleton: And not that I know of. Descendants are pretty rare.

* * *

**Who is Alcyon Soldie?**

Eridan: Seadweller student in the same brood as me. She’s not very sociable.  
Eridan: Tends to give the impression she finds us all crude, in several senses of the word.  
Eridan: She had this matesprit she really wanted to keep with her but couldn’t, since the matesprit was jade and had to go to the Caverns.

* * *

**Did any callus members of the ships crew have a betting pool on which of the new meat would get Overbeared?**

Naspar: And how long they’d live, and how they’d die.  
Naspar: I didn’t participate, but I don’t think it required unusual callousness.  
Naspar: Overbear was a fact of life here for as long as most of us remember. The betting was macabre, but…  
Naspar: Anyway Callea won 5000 caegars betting Zahhak would survive.

* * *

**Well now I'm curious, what were the most common bets for Equius with regards to mode of death and how long lived?**

Gathay Callea: Back of the skull caved in is the usual favorite method bet, but strangulation was climbing. Couldn’t say why – I guess they thought Zahhak seemed strangle-able?  
Gathay Callea: I bet he’d survive because everything was going WEIRD all of a sudden. SOMETHING was looking out for him.  
Gathay Callea: The timetable pool wasn’t properly set up because Overbear hadn’t caught him yet.

* * *

**ghosts can control their appearance a bit right? what does the demoness look like?**

Skeleton: They say she wears death-green and pins up her hair.  
Skeleton: Besides that, like a much older Megido, I assume.  
Skeleton: Or anything she wants to look like.

* * *

**Weird question, but did the lady who survived overbear join in the bets at all?**

Caviah: …  
Caviah: No.

* * *

**Dear Jadebloods: Is part of your job making sure powerful lusii don't start coming in too low of blood colors? (I remember in mindfangs journal she expressed surprise someone so midblooded was allowed to be raised by a dragon). How powerful is a lowblood lusii allowed to be?**

Ashtar: Not that I know of…?

_[Two possibilities: (1) Mindfang was full of shit, or (2) there was some effort to keep strong lusii out of lowblood hands – in that time period, after the Signless stirred things up but before all adults got removed from the planet, rendering lowbloods’ lusii largely irrelevant.]_

* * *

**What does Gathay Callea mean by weird stuff? What kind of stuff did the ghost defense squad do in the robot workspace when overbear dropped by? Did they activate dangerous tools and other spooky stuff?**

Gathay: Nnnnoooo, more like exploding light fixtures. And a feeling of someone WATCHING when no one was there. And possibly chucklevoodoos from nowhere.

* * *

**Wow when I asked about the weirdest prosthetic I just assumed it would be something like someone wanting an arm that ended in three guns instead of a hand or something. Was Equius there when the ducklusus bulge thing happened because I can't tell if he'd pass out from embarrassment or take it as an artistic challenge that it look just right.**

Equius: I was there.  
Equius: My supervisor cited my taste in art and said it was obviously my field of expertise, and assigned me to construct all of them.  
Equius: I lost all my scheduled free time for over a week.  
Equius: It was. A relief. Considering the circumstances.

* * *

**Do imperial drones have ghosts?**

Aradia: Nnnnnnot that I know of…

* * *

**Did anyone apart from Caviah survive Overbear? Is there like a secret support group for survivors and friends of the victims or something?**

Alesse: Other survivors – yes, over the sweeps. Maybe about… one in thirty lived? I think the percentage went up and down over time.  
Alesse: Any support group for survivors, no.  
Alesse: Mostly they tried to forget. And avoid him.  
Alesse: And get transfers off the ship. Out of the squadron, when possible.

* * *

**Equius, do you like your new line of work? What's something you always wished you could build?**

Equius: I… yes.  
Equius: I cannot think of anything I STRONGly wanted to build in the past but was unable to.  
Equius: It is more that with finer materials and tools, and collaboration with other specialists, many things become possible.

* * *

**Dear Jades: Do imperial drones come from the mother grub?**

Vigilant: All of the ones involved in genetic material collection – or other contact with us – do. I think a lot of the ones in the Fleet as a whole are actually robotic replicas. Production isn’t high enough.

* * *

**Do captains of a ship wind up with a personal laughsassin tasked with weeding out any highbloods who are keeping the ship from functioning effectively?**

Bonebelt: Only if they have the connections to get one and the common sense to realize one would be useful.  
Bonebelt: …Not that we’re supposed to know about that. We just have to clean up after it, from time to time.  
Bonebelt: In our squadron, I think Gathering Swarm and Magnificent Marine Predation have… preemptive retribution specialists.

* * *

**How did Overbear get started with his serial murdering?**

Aradia: No one seems to know. …Or really care.  
Aradia: He killed one by accident and got away with it and decided he liked it?  
Aradia: It’d be easier to speculate if we knew which came first – the murdering or the pursuit of young, vulnerable quadrants.

* * *

**Wait, fleet drones are robotic? Has the robot crew built/designed any parts for them or new models? Or will that wait till they're older?**

Naspar: FAR above our pay grade. Maybe someday.  
Gathay: We have some awesome ideas.  
Naspar: …A long, LONG time in the future.

* * *

**Has there ever been a jade or jades who disguised their blood colour so they could get off Alternia?**

Oncetold: I can’t be completely sure, but I think so.  
Oncetold: I know of a handful of cases, over the sweeps, when someone at Conscription was down in the records as jade, but showed up something else.  
Oncetold: Some of those were probably errors in the records. It happens.  
Oncetold: Some of them probably weren’t.

* * *

**Are there any rainbow drinkers in the Fleet?**

Oncetold: …Probably, actually?  
Oncetold: The organism can live in non-jades, but needs sunlight to mature – I think other planets have less intense solar radiation that non-jades can tolerate, but that might feed the organism?  
Oncetold: Plus there are highbloods around for a very long time, if tiny bits of exposure add up – I’m not sure that they do, but I’m not sure they don’t?  
Oncetold: So… I’d guess there are a few out there somewhere.

* * *

**If the Gleeful Abandon has subjugglators, and the Ruthless Regulation has legislacerators, then what does the Unrelenting Persecution have?**

Sollux: It’s not a major training center or specialty hub. Just… personnel.  
Sollux: There’s a fair amount of manufacturing, actually.

* * *

**Does nobody in the Fleet (that is, higher-ups) care about Officer Corpsepap's mental state? She is supposedly the one in command- has nobody tried to get her some medical care, at least?**

Jannin Lepsir: …Yeah, nobody cares.

* * *

**Hey Briate, what was it like being the auspistice of a pair of crazed murder-loving nutjobs? Did you actually like them, or was it just a job?**

Briate: It was a… responsibility.  
Briate: I’m not saying I didn’t feel anything for them – I was DEFINITELY ashen for them. Up ‘til the end.  
Briate: But I didn’t LIKE them a whole lot, no.

* * *

**Has Awwakk admitted that her relationship was fucked up yet?**

Mollym: Well, Hesten apparently went CRAZY while I wasn’t paying attention…

_[Admitting she wasn’t paying attention may be a step in the right direction?]_

* * *

**Wait did Pappad do the spike in head thing to the purple guy?**

Terezi: It’s possible he was involved in a cahoots conspiring at it, but he didn’t commit the staking.  
Terezi: He was surprised to see it.  
Terezi: Smart money is an older trainee or trainees.

* * *

**whoever in 0k can answer: Is personal slavery still a thing in troll culture? Or since everyone is a member of the fleet is it just that everyone is sort of state property? Or is it just that highbloods buy slaves from the fleet rather than there being an open trade?**

Sharpeye: To an extent, yes, everyone in the Fleet is Fleet property, placed in the custodianship of their superior officers – which is why superior officers can always complain about their subordinates getting killed, if they want.  
Sharpeye: It is legally possible for someone to be cashiered from Fleet service and sold to the highest bidder. It’s not generally practiced in this particular squadron. It’s… *untidy*.  
Sharpeye: Some places, especially where there are longer-term planetary presences, commercial slavery is more common.  
Sharpeye: –Which is not to say that people don’t get *effectively* bought and sold, via bribes to captains or supervisors or personnel departments. But that’s not what it is *legally*, usually.

* * *

**How much of the cultural idea of secrecy around the Jade caverns is promoted by the jades and how much is the government trying to keep one of alternias weak points as mysterious as possible?**

Perses: Well, I’m sure they wouldn’t want aliens knowing all about the caverns. It IS a big vulnerability.  
Perses: But I think the caverns were very secretive a loooooooooong time before we ever left the planet.  
Perses: It’s got a lot of religious aspects.

* * *

**So you guys won't be building real drones for a few hundred sweeps...but does the robot fighting league have any robots themed after drones? Cullbot5000 and his pulsing pail pistons will pound you into parts!**

Vigilant: Any pail-bearing drones may enter the caverns and are STRICTLY natural ones!  
Naspar: You say that like it has any relevance to what they build.  
Rayshe: Callea had this bunch of five ten-centimeter mini-drones that fought as a team. That was awesome.

* * *

**How would Officer Corpsepap take it if Graywire asked to be dispelled? Or, what would happen if someone dispelled Graywire to help her?**

Jannin Lepsir: …Badly.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Don't have to answer this if it's too uncomfortable a topic but in 0k, if Overbear had just been forcing people into his quadrants and presumably his bed, would that still have been illegal? Or was it just that he kept killing highbloods without proper justification?**

Sharpeye: Intimidating or pressuring someone into a relationship isn’t illegal.  
Sharpeye: –Regardless of relative caste and rank, actually, if someone lower-status is pressuring you and you can’t stand up to it that’s your own problem.  
Sharpeye: If you claim they agreed to a quadrant and they didn’t, that’s fraud. If there’s a sufficient status difference you might not NEED their agreement, but don’t lie about it.  
Sharpeye: Actual physical force can be classified as assault where applicable, but prosecution for any kind of assault is rare unless it results in a performance-affecting injury, and even then there are a variety of circumstances that render it legal.  
Sharpeye: So basically… if he hadn’t killed them, prosecution would be extremely unlikely.  
Sharpeye: What’s a lot more likely is one of the discarded high blues coming back in a hundred sweeps, challenging him to single combat, and ripping his head off.

* * *

**Has any necropath considered just biting the bullet and wooing corpsepap all pale like? Get her over her moirail with a new one?**

Jannin: I’m not seeing an enormous advantage for the necropath in that.

* * *

**Jannin: Are the necropaths quietly running a pool on whether Corpsepap dies of being culled for incompetence or dies of brain rot?**

Jannin: Not that they’ve told ME about. But it won’t be for incompetence unless she gets really unlucky; the rest of us have the place running smoothly.

* * *

**So, Bonebelt, Drybleach, Scavenge, who are you guys and what do you think of Aradia? What's it like being a necropath?**

Bonebelt: Necropath is probably the best possible job for a rustblood, and could well be better than a lot of higher-caste jobs, too.  
Bonebelt: Megido is a good kid, although her ghost collection is a little out of control and the way the dead necropaths treat her is a little… unnerving.  
Bonebelt: As for me, well… I’m probably about two-thirds of the way through my career here. Not sure what there is to say.

* * *

**Ok. To non-necropaths (especially older &experienced ones): Are there any means to discern if some necropath is doing their thing or just putting on a show for your sake? (I.e. besides residual haunting.) And in case of affirmative answer, to necropaths: Do these means make any sense whatsoever?**

Hightide: The only way to know is to have a necropath who’s more loyal to you than they are to their peers. Which is great if you can get one, but rare.  
Hightide: We don’t encourage questioning of it.  
Hightide: Second-guessing whether necropaths are obeying orders would lead to executing necropaths because there is no proof, and then we’d run out of necropaths, and there would be dead necropaths running around, and from what I’ve heard that is not a desirable situation.  
Hightide: The important thing is that the problem haunting is no longer occurring.

* * *

**With a new mother grub, will you be able to test some things? Like seeing if you can make it mass produce jades by giving it only jade slurry?**

Kebela: *HIGH OCTANE SIDE-EYING*

_[Which is to say, they probably COULD, but they also probably WON’T.]_

* * *

**necropaths, whats the highest blood necropath youve seen?**

Bonebelt: I think we’ve had a few yellows in the Bureau of Retermination, though not while I’ve been here.  
Bonebelt: As far as necropath POWERS go, it’s hard to say. It’s a lowblood power, and it’s not impossible to hide it, so I expect most non-lowbloods who manifest it just suppress it.

Skeleton: Only met her when we were both ghosts, and she absolutely kept it a secret while she was alive, but purple.

* * *

**Bonebelt: what do you mean by unnerving? Do you have any theories as to why they are treating her like that?**

Bonebelt: Hmm. Bonebelt: They STEP CAREFULLY with her, in a way they almost never do. Bonebelt: Give the impression that keeping her happy is the prudent thing to do. Not just safe, but also not really upset. Bonebelt: It’s unusual. Bonebelt: My best guess why is it has to do with how strong she is? Maybe bad things happen when extremely strong necropaths get very upset.

* * *

**So is there a stigma associated with being a non low blood necropath? Or is it because theyre not low blooded theyre expected to eventually run the Bureau of Retermination and since theyre necropaths that would also mean keeping it honest and holding necropaths accountable (which seems like it would be horrible idea to actually do)?**

Skeleton: Oh, absolutely there’s a stigma. Necropath is a LOWBLOOD POWER. There’s something WRONG with a highblood with… lowbloodiness.  
Skeleton: Practically speaking, I think highly-placed people might have decided at some point that a more long-lived necropath would have too much time to accumulate power.

* * *

**I've been wondering, if dead necropaths can dispel ghosts, why doesn't the dead necropath who was mentioned on the Gleeful Abandon just dispel everyone themself?**

Aradia: I think mostly because most of them don’t want to leave.  
Aradia: And if they’re causing problems, well…

* * *

**Are there any helmsmen who could have been in the Bureau instead? Who didn't get saved?**

Skeleton: Not often, but it does happen sometimes.  
Skeleton: None in this squadron now.

* * *

**Do helmsmen ever try to rebel- say, take over the ship and fly off? What happens if a helmsman goes insane?**

Sollux: There are a lot of failsafes and routines to prevent that.  
Sollux: And an isolated system can deal with an insane helmsman, no problem.  
Sollux: But if an integrated-system helmsman snaps and the failsafes fail, the results can be… spectacular.

* * *

**Terezi, what does evidenstriking entail?**

Terezi: Collection of physical evidence!  
Terezi: And CLUES!

* * *

**Hey Skeleton, what's the best part of being a ghost?**

Skeleton: Nobody can tell me what to do.

* * *

**So if Jadebloods are a pseudo religious caste is there a troll equivalent of a sexy nun outfit associated with Jadebloods?**

Ashtar: Yes, yes there is!  
Ashtar: You see it in, like, softcore porn and stuff.  
Ashtar: I haven’t seen anyone wearing anything like it here, though? Everyone seems to go for a lot more practical than ethereal robes.

* * *

**ok question for anyone who can answer: Considering Alternia has had filming technology for so long, and highbloods live so long, have most highbloods acted in at least one thing during in acting phase they wasted a few decades on?**

Skeleton: It’s not that easy to drop in and out of the movie-production industry, even for highbloods.  
Skeleton: Buuuuut if that’s something they’re deeply interested in, there eventually comes a point where they’ve saved enough resources to cook up their own amateur production.  
Skeleton: Those can be… interesting.

* * *

**With how commonplace violence is among trolls, how common are robotic limbs in the general population?**

Naspar: Overall, maybe about as common as corrective lenses?  
Naspar: Not so much for people our age, but as you go older, the percentage rises.

* * *

**0k: do mother grubs get names? Do they have any preference as to their attendants?**

Kanaya: I have never heard of the Mother Grub having a name.  
Kanaya: …  
Kanaya: A mother grub having a name.  
Kanaya: It’s… this is new territory.

Altadona: She does seem to have some preference in attendants, although this generally isn’t communicated very clearly.

* * *

**Have there ever been any Fleet rebellions- famous ones, brutal ones, ridiculous ones, successful ones?**

Skeleton: Well, obviously the Empire hasn’t been overthrown, but I believe there have been some ships lost over the sweeps that were not, in fact, destroyed – successful desertion on a large scale.  
Skeleton: There have also been some large-scale mutinies. Which ended in bloodbaths, of course.  
Skeleton: Famous ones… well, there’s the ‘Plentiful Plunderable Resources’ mutiny, that was pretty famous.  
Skeleton: The most successful ones get… erased, as much as possible.

* * *

**So... what happened with the Plentiful Plunderable Resources thing?**

Karkat: The captain – Cheerful, you can’t tell me THAT’S not a bad sign – went completely batshit and started torturing the crew, even the highbloods.  
Karkat: They finally snapped, killed him, and ran away to a paradise planet.  
Karkat: …There’s a movie.  
Skeleton: Reality was, ah, not quite like the movie.  
Skeleton: Everyone involved was a little batshit.  
Skeleton: And the planet wasn’t all the paradisical, especially after they got there.  
Karkat: But it’s a classic movie!

* * *

**Sollux: Seriously consider 'Buzzkill' as adult name**

Sollux: Helmsmen don’t get adult names.  
Sollux: And sure, I could make one up if I wanted, but I don’t think “Buzzkill” is it.  
Sollux: “Buzz” might have some potential…

* * *

**Ashtar where DO you get those things?**

Ashtar: Make them, mostly.  
Ashtar: There are all SORTS of odd chemicals you can find if you look around the caverns enough.  
Ashtar: I have a nose for it.

* * *

**So if mother grubs have preferences in attendants, I'm going to guess that the new itty bitty baby likes Kanaya best, right?**

Kanaya: She, um.  
Kanaya: Seems to be most accustomed to my voice.

* * *

**Eridan, hows team building going?**

Eridan: Uuuuuggghhhhh, I couldn’t even get in a small group with Kellep and Soldie.  
Eridan: They would’ve been the least odious options.

* * *

**Hey Kanaya, you brought her to the caverns and hatched her, why don't *you* give the new Mother Grub a name?**

Kanaya: …  
Kanaya: It does not…  
Kanaya: Feel right, exactly.   
Kanaya: And I have no idea what I would name her if it did feel right.

* * *

**Hey, Team Investighosting the Caverns, have you found any ghosts you want to bring back with you?**

Vriska: Define “want to”.  
Vriska: We certainly haven’t run into anyone we couldn’t live without!  
Gamzee: Um…  
Vriska: You KNOW what I MEAN.  
Karkat: We’re trying to talk Desk Ghost into coming back with us. That way if – when – we need to come back here, we won’t have to trek all the way from the platform site, we could follow her to the caverns where she died.  
Vriska: And I GUESS I see the point.  
Feferi: The one ghost who always roots for Heiresses but is still pro-Empire wants to come with me, but she’d probably blow my cover.

* * *

**Has anyone in the squadron managed to figure out any details that they shouldn't know? One of Terezi's classmates or superiors, or a necropath, or maybe another helmsman?**

Aradia: It sort of depends on what you consider things they shouldn’t know?  
Aradia: There are a lot of people who know more than we’d prefer them to, ideally.   
Aradia: And dead necropaths… There’s nothing to be done about that I don’t think.   
Aradia: We tried not to let on we all know each other, but clearly that didn’t work very well.   
Aradia: We’d rather no one know about Karkat or Feferi’s blood… I think that was mostly successful about Feferi, but Karkat has that cult…

* * *

**Is the new mother grub ok? No mutations or defects or anything?**

Kanaya: She’s perfect.

Altadona: As far as any of us understand, she is healthy and functions as anticipated.

* * *

**Kanaya: How long before you (or anyone else) expects the new Mother Grub to be able to start laying?**

Kanaya: Approximately three hundred days, but initial broods will be small.

* * *

**What's the most tasteless thing the Empress has done, that wasn't anything involving Sufferists?**

Skeleton: Everything the Empress does is DEFINED as being in good taste.   
Skeleton: Or is it good taste is defined as including everything she does?  
Skeleton: That said… that “youth-marketed” season of “Drone Season: Pail or Die” a few hundred sweeps back? When she had the drones snatch actual seven- and eight-sweep-olds off Alternia?  
Skeleton: Judging by the way she had everyone involved culled halfway through and forbid discussion of it, even she eventually decided that was a bad idea.

* * *

**Given how competitive the field seems to be, has anyone seriously tried to hurt Terezi- or Tavros?**

Terezi: Oh, you know, just the usual sort of stuff.   
Terezi: A lot less hard than FLARPing.

* * *

**Maybe Efessa's thoughts on being in the Fleet now? And the Terrifying Ghost Army's reactions to a jade among them?**

Efessa: It’s been… interesting.   
Efessa: I’m – I was – still a novice, I’m not that old, it should not feel so weird to be surrounded by other colors.   
Efessa: It is weird, though. Everything’s weird.   
Efessa: I did say I wanted a change…

Gilyan: *silent fuming*

* * *

**So, has spike through the head guy murdered his charming moirail yet?**

Tavros: No.   
Terezi: Laovic is still HEAVILY focused on finding out who attacked him.   
Terezi: I’m not sure he’s been paying enough attention to tell how ~charming~ his moirail is.

* * *

**Heiress ghost on the Battleship Condescension: So how do you feel about the Demoness?**

Exploded heiress: Might as well ask how you feel about the sun.

* * *

**Do grub necropaths automatically leave ghosts, or is there a certain power level one has to reach first?**

Skeleton: I… honestly have no idea.   
Skeleton: I guess I’m in a good position to find out, though!


	281. ==> BE PAST SOLLUX / PAST ARADIA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Could se see anything from this universe's version of the FLARP revenge cycle?

==> BE SOLLUX

The control somehow jerks, and fizzles out. The mind honey is already sickly sweet in your mouth.

You lift your face away from Aradia as fast as you can, because maybe, MAYBE–

Your vision whites out as your powers fire uncontrollably. Fucking MIND HONEY.

When you can hear anything but roaring, you hear Aradia shouting your name. So that’s all right, then.

You drop down to the grass and let yourself pass out.

==> BE ARADIA

Okay. You’re alive. That’s good.

Also it’ll be dawn in a few hours and you’re here with an unconscious Sollux, a panicking lusus, and a hive with no roof or second floor.

Fun.


	282. ==> BE AMIETY AMMETE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: I don't know if you're still taking POV requests, but if you are, can we see Ammete telling Overbear that he's scum?

“Oh. It’s you. I’ve been expecting you. Expected you sooner, actually – were you defeated by the new scheduling interface when you tried to work out where I was?

"I don’t know, it doesn’t much matter whether I’m funny. Is that why they didn’t let you in the subjugglators? You just aren’t funny? You lack creativity? Or did you know your limits and not try for it?

"I guess you do have a history of knowing your limits… it’s not like you try your little games on anyone your own age. If they ever let you on the conscription platform I bet you’d sneak off and kidnap a pre-adult.

"No, I just think you’re pathetic. In an extremely un-pitiable way. And you’re too creepy to be un-platonically hateable. When you finally fuck up and someone takes you down, or old age catches up with you, whoever’s protecting you will probably sigh with relief that one embarrassment is gone, everyone else will sigh with relief that YOU’RE gone.

"You say that like killing me will fix a single fucking thing wrong with you.

"It WON’T.”


	283. ==> BE SUPPLIES TECH COUNTALL

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: can we see whoever has the job of finding out what to do with darkleers trophy consider whether giving them to survivors of overbear would be justice and piss off his ghost or just tacky as heck.

==> BE SUPPLIES TECH COUNTALL

You really could have done WITHOUT your boss dumping this on you. But you think you’ve got the announcement in a form that can go out to the squadron with only a small chance of it inspiring someone to kill you.

ATTENTION: Anyone with an interest in the late ex-Colonel Overbear  
SUBJECT: Contents of storage locker  
If anyone has reason to believe the storage locker contains something you would NOT want to show up on the entertainment program “Salvagers Descend On Unclaimed Storage Unit Like Starving Lusii”, you have two weeks to come make your claim before we ship it to the show.


	284. ==> BE SUKETS PAPPAD / LAGUST LAOVIC / MOSTLY RETIRED INQUISITORMENTOR

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we get some short pov snippets of random trolls reacting to the latest garping?

==> BE SUKETS PAPPAD

There is maniacal laughter and obviously fake “glub”-ing coming from nowhere in the hall.

Why.

==> BE LAGUST LAOVIC

All right, that is the FOURTH TIME you heard someone yell “I confiscate your property and feed it to my lusus!” There is NO REASON for you to hallucinate that, even if you’re hallucinating, which is NOT established.

You just wish someone else would mention it first.

==> BE THE MOSTLY RETIRED INQUISITORMENTOR WHO LIKES PUPPETMASTER GAMES

“Is this the person?”

You hear voices when you can’t feel any minds attached to them.

“Yeah… are you sure this is a good idea?”

“No, but he wouldn’t be the first old guy the crocodile ate.”

…You really need to find the minds that go with them.


	285. ==> BE THE ALTADONA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: maybe some older jades getting dead set on setting up some infrastructure so that this kind of mess can be avoided in the future?

==> BE THE ALTADONA

“I know we have engineers who can EXCAVATE rock – what about carving things into rock? Words, specifically?”


	286. ==> BE CERISS LYDACE

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Lydace: Knit something to honor the Mother Grub.

==> BE CERISS LYDACE

You look at your good yarn, which you haven’t used since the freezer/ghost thing. This would be a good occasion to pick it up again, you think.

But WHAT do you knit in honor of the Mother Grub?


	287. The 'fake subjugglator lawnring killings' movie

–mentioned amateur sleuth is a seadweller. The fake subjugglator attempts a ‘we are not so different’ spiel – he can’t be a subjugglator like he feels called to be, so he’s doing it now, while she can’t be a legislacerator, so she’s doing it now. She doesn’t deny it but just throws him across the block into his crushing machine; bad special effects follow. In real life, he wasn’t the one to note the parallels.   
–The source of the poison gas in the movie is wannabe’s moirail finally snapping, while it was considerably more complicated in real life.   
–In the movie, the only people to get out alive are the seadweller, her two sidekicks, and a couple of love interests, with the neighborhood going up in (questionably CGI’d) multicolored flames behind them. More dramatic that way.   
–Movie filmed, but then cut, sleuth and sidekicks riding off to continue their attempt to cross the continent, which they did. The movie was mostly written and pitched by midblood survivors of the lawnrings.

* * *

The seadweller sleuth now has a really unremarkable seadweller-officer position, not responsible for any kind of investigating, but spends her free time writing a series of amateur mystery novels under a pseudonym, set before adults had to leave Alternia, featuring a seadweller trying to avenge something (it has not been revealed what), disguised as an indigo legislacerator, solving mysteries and pursuing wrongdoers across the continent. The novels are neither officially sanctioned nor particularly popular, but have a small following.

(Among the kinds of people who try to figure these things out, opinions are split on whether the author is really a legislacerator who made the protagonist a seadweller in order to write about going after subjugglators while obeying hemospectrum hierarchy, or a seadweller doing a really weird self-insert.)

* * *

“Preceptor, you care more for the sanctity of your dungeons than you do for THE LAW!” Iceblade drew her sword. The Preceptor’s eyes widened slightly at the glimmering blue of the metal. She doubted he knew what it meant, though, or he’d be more alarmed. An ice venom coating was nothing to be shrugged off even by a purpleblood.

“You think you can fight me, shitblood?” the Preceptor demanded, rising to his admittedly impressive height.

If only he knew. Well, none of his business. Still drawing attention with her sword, Iceblade drew one of her gas grenades from her bag, pulled the pin with her teeth, and hurled it at the Preceptor’s feet.

Firehand had delivered on her promise of faster-acting agents: he crumpled after a breath. It was supposed to be faster-diffusing, too, but Iceblade still held her breath as she ventured close enough to prod the Preceptor with her sword, breaking the skin enough to hit nerves.

No reaction. He was dead or unconscious. (Should be unconscious, but dosage could get tricky – couldn’t be helped.)

Iceblade sheathed her sword and proceeded further into the antisanctuary, alert for other subjugglators. She WOULD have her witness – and the rest of the dungeon, too, to compensate her for the inconvenience.

(from “Coverup by Clown”, by ‘Polara Legges’)


	288. ==> BE LAGUST LAOVIC

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Anonymous asked: Laovic got any leads, real or fake?

==> BE LAGUST LAOVIC

Most of the case presentations are of interest only for how the trainees handled them – no one really cares about a little nuisance sabotage here or small-scale under-the-table chemical dealing there. It’s more interesting to you-as-fellow-students than it is to the proper legislacerators, but only because it’s amusing to picture Pappad having to get rescued from a fertilizer vat.

Pyrope and Skaree will be opening the second night of case presentations, so any legislacerators who just want to see the one ACTUAL CASE they somehow stumbled on can leave right afterwards. You’re a little curious about that. Gossip was buzzing on the subject, the last few days, but you were too preoccupied to pick up much.

Now? You’re staying in clear public view until it’s your turn to present, and whenever possible you’re keeping your eyes on Hirdan Yatton, two classes ahead of you.

He’s noticed you watching, and he’s starting to sweat.


	289. Q&A XI

**Anonymous asked: pov Troll tony hawke: do a sick grind on tavros horns**

****

Tavros: …

* * *

**pov Robot mother grub: gain sentience, go on rampage**

****

Equius: …  
Gathay: …  
Rayshe: …  
Komlee: …  
Naspar: Why, why would you SAY that?

* * *

**Alesse: Watch Lydace knit something and offer advice on how to improve her technique.**

****

Alesse: I’d like to, but I’m trying not to be creepy at her.

* * *

**ghost!grubs: gnaw on something and act adorable**

****

Skeleton: Hardly any of them are… hmm… defined enough to do anything like that.  
Skeleton: They’re more a sort of haze.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Hey Chidro, what's your favorite song from Troll Hamilton?**

****

Chidro: I have never listened to Troll Hamilton!  
Chidro: It’s considered a bit, um…  
Chidro: Listening to the album is allowed! EXCEPT if you’re a highblood, or a professional musician. Then it’s a black mark against you.  
Chidro: Plus there’s that thing where if you do anything influenced by it you might get subjugglated.  
Chidro: So I’ve never listened.  
Chidro: (Not any way that could be traced to me, anyway.)  
Chidro: (I liked the one where the guy goes ‘I’m a general, wheee’, and the one at the end where Elizah decides to live to tell the story.)  
Chidro: (I’m not really a fan of internal quadrant drama, so some of the rest of it was lost on me.)

* * *

**So how are Gamzee and Cephal's jams going? Have they found anyone else to come play with them?**

****

Cephal: You don’t want to invite too many people to a practice session.  
Cephal: It gets awkward.  
Cephal: At least for me it does.  
Cephal: Sometimes another guitar ghost shows up a time or two, that’s fine.

* * *

**While now I'm extremely curious how that episode of “Salvagers Descend On Unclaimed Storage Unit Like Starving Lusii” went.**

****

Troll 1: “Is this – it IS! Mummified severed hands!”

Voiceover: “Depending on age, blood color, provenance, and condition, preserved hands can bring up to five thousand caegars at auction, but five hundred is more typical.”

Troll 2: “But Sniffout’s a fan. He LOVES his stray body parts.”

[Shot of Troll 1 clapping the mummified hands to his face in a ‘Home Alone’ gesture.]

Troll 2: “If he could be half this interested in jewelry…”

* * *

**Speaking of the Murder Recon trio, how are they doing these days?**

****

Scanfire: Ugh my head.  
Sharpwit: As well as could be expected.  
Shredear: I don’t know why people keep complaining about ghosts, this is nothing.

* * *

**How does a seadweller end up needing remedial training? And what's the one who tested out of everything doing?**

****

Eridan: As far as I can tell, not ever doing any of the schoolfeeding.  
Eridan: Except for whatever was necessary for literary analysis. For some reason.  
Eridan: I guess the one who tested out of education went straight into officer training?

* * *

**I'm not sure if this has been asked before, but in 0k, Aradia said older ghosts are stronger: doesn't that mean the Condescention would be nigh-undispellable? Like, a ghost from a troll that old and that strong seems like she'd be on par with even old necropath ghosts**

****

Skeleton: I… am honestly not sure.  
Skeleton: Especially given that she does have some resistance already…  
Skeleton: But no one learns how to function as a ghost IMMEDIATELY. It takes time, even with help. That’s a potential vulnerable point…  
Skeleton: Well, I don’t know. Just…  
Skeleton: I wouldn’t bet on any of us against her, but I wouldn’t bet on her against you-know-who.  
Skeleton: You know.  
Skeleton: HER.

(Demoness: CHALLENGE FUCKING ACCEPTED)

* * *

**Is Eridan actually going to be good at something? Cause like really, give this boy at least one redeeming quality in the arts.**

****

Feferi: Pretty sure he hasn’t actually tried anything but singing, and that wasn’t trying very hard.  
Feferi: And drawing when he was a little kid.  
Feferi: He’s got a definite STYLE he likes… I’d say visual arts are more his speed than music. Or dance.  
Feferi: His fiction isn’t unreadable, and it’d probably be better now, but I’m not actually supposed to have read any of it.  
Feferi: I think Karkat’s solution is best for the immediate situation.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Eridan: Solve your own problem and Zahhaks by buying the robo mother grub and robo enemies and have your art piece be a mock battle where you defend her. A battle-play at least has no singing involved.**

****

Eridan: Okay, but what if the crazy engineers made their fightingbots too good and wouldn’t make them lose on purpose and they actually killed me?

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Hey, Perses, what *was* Maltha using the media player for?**

****

Perses: …  
Perses: Let’s just say that for someone so obnoxiously rulebound and ~proper~ in daily life, Maltha enjoys some surprisingly… *transgressive*… media.  
Perses: Like. I don’t want to judge, because then I’d sound like her, and objectively I guess there’s nothing WRONG with liking it.  
Perses: Because it’s all done with special effects.  
Perses: …I feel like it wouldn’t go over well around here.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Has Eridan had any luck with finding a moirail? Is Soldie feeling any better? (Maybe Sollux could help her send a message, or something?)**

****

Eridan: We’re still sorta dancing around each other.  
Eridan: Her moods ebb and flow some, so she is feeling better for the moment…  
Eridan: I admitted I’m a little uncomfortable around other people’s lusii. She says I just need to get to know them more. I think that wouldn’t actually help.  
Eridan: I guess we’re paleflirting?

Sollux: We’ll have to see if she’s trustworthy, first.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: So which seadweller did the best art piece in honor of the mother grub?**

****

Eridan: The show hasn’t happened yet. [as of the posting of this response!]  
Eridan: But it won’t be anyone in MY cadre.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Will Her Imperious Condescension be doing any public celebration of the new holiday?**

****

HIC: Meh, why not.  
HIC: Any reason’s a good reason to party, amirite?  
HIC: Shell fucking yeah I’m right.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: So subjugglators that don't get training shipped first tend to die, but are there any that got thrown in the fire like gamzee and thrived instead of dying like expected?**

****

Surepain-on-the-Gleeful-Abandon: …Yes.  
Surepain-on-the-Gleeful-Abandon: I can think of one.  
Surepain-on-the-Gleeful-Abandon: She’s now… a highly successful subjugglator.  
Surepain-on-the-Gleeful-Abandon: I understand she’s not considered stable enough for any sort of command position, though.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Has any subjuglator gotten control of a conquered planet and turned it into one giant 24hour carnival?**

****

Skeleton: Uh… briefly, I think.  
Skeleton: Turns out not to be terribly sustainable.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Has the mother grub had any reaction to the holiday in her name?**

****

Kebela: No.  
Kebela: –Neither of them.  
Kebela: …I’m not sure if it’s actually been mentioned in front of either of them, we're trying not to distract them.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: ...OK, can we learn more about the subjugglator who survived the Gleeful Abandon? I'm intrigued.**

****

Sharpeye: Oh, I remember hearing about this.  
Sharpeye: She got a prestigious ‘outstanding subjugglator novice’ award.  
Sharpeye: She tore the interviewer’s arm off.  
Sharpeye: There were some rather protracted legal proceedings involving the subjugglator hierarchy, the interview production group, and the interviewer’s seadweller auspisticee.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Have any ghosts tried to kill the new Mother Grub?**

****

Skeleton: Not recently, no.  
Skeleton: :)  
Kanaya: …Is that a ‘not more than once’?  
Skeleton: Oh, I haven’t let any of them get to once.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Has anyone figured out why Laovic specifically got staked? Did anyone try anything like that with Skaree?**

****

Terezi: Skaree was targeted by three out-and-out murder attempts that I know of, one by someone whose exam score she sabotaged and two just to cut the competition.  
Terezi: None of them adequately compensated for her paranoia.  
Terezi: As for Laovic… I’m not sure.  
Terezi: They didn’t make sure he was dead, is the thing. That’s sloppy, sloppier than I’d expect from someone who didn’t leave any obvious evidence.  
Terezi: I’d say it definitely has a personal component to it. I’m not sure precisely what!

* * *

**Anonymous asked: What's the new ghostgossip about? That Nepeta was thrown into pitfighting as a grub and only got to eat when she won? That her moirail tried to my-fair-lady her? That she once jumped onto a dragons back in flight and tore it's wings off and ate it on the way down?**

****

Karkat: They haven’t gotten QUITE that detailed about it yet.  
Karkat: …That dragon one will probably be going around inside a few hours, now that you’ve mentioned it.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Jorjel, does your block now look like a crime scene?**

****

Jorjel: Not exactly…  
Jorjel: It wasn’t a lusus, so the blood is obviously not troll blood.  
Jorjel: It’s just… everywhere.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Nepeta what are you going to do with the meat? Is there a kitchen you can borrow or is it ok to eat raw?**

****

Nepeta: I haven’t asked about a cookalizer or anything, but it wouldn’t surpurrise me if we could request access if we want to.  
Nepeta: But raw is fine for me!  
Nepeta: :33

Backwing: That’s her own business, but I AM going to insist that leftovers be FROZEN, not just “stashed”.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Are some of the trolls on Nepeta's ship a bit afraid of her getting too near their lusus now?**

****

Backwing: It wasn’t even an unattached lusus, it was a designated prey animal purchased for the occasion. Soooo, they should be fine unless they’re afraid of accidentally selling their lusus as a prey animal.  
Backwing: It’s not impossible someone might get irrational about it, but in terms of killing things it’s just… not that exciting.  
Backwing: Messy, but all completely legal and aboveboard.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Jesus christ Nepeta, even normal earth boars are giant monsters, how on earth did you take down a terrifying alternian one?**

****

Nepeta: It WAS a bit of a challenge without Pounce!  
Nepeta: But we’ve taken bigger pigs befur.  
Nepeta: :33  
Nepeta: This one was kind of lazy and out-of-shape from lounging around a ship.  
Nepeta: Not the smartest, either.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: We've seen how Soldie is doing without Arvaat, but how is Arvaat doing without Soldie?**

****

Vigilant: She’s made some comments here and there about missing her matesprit.  
Vigilant: For the most part she’s thrown herself into her duties as a perfect jade – kept very busy.  
Kebela: She talks about her matespritship in the present tense.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Laovic, was there any chance a teacher attacked you? You're high blooded enough it might be better for them to not outright have you culled but just take care of it themselves, yah?**

****

Laovic: It’s… certainly not unheard of for instructors to dispose of trainees they find unsatisfactory.  
Sharpeye: Though doing it anonymously is discouraged!  
Laovic: The thing is, I feel like an instructor who wanted to get rid of me would finish the job.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: What would cause more damage to a ship, a lusus rampage or a robot rampage?**

****

Naspar: …I’m going to go lie down.  
Tavros: Hmmmm.  
Tavros: In terms of what’s POSSIBLE, I would go with robots. Lusii can’t–  
Tavros: Wait, do non-psionic trolls ever get psionic lusii?  
Equius: Robot damage is generally very localized and they are quickly destroyed if out of control.  
Equius: If you’re talking about the recreational fighting robots at least.  
Sollux: There are some large, heavy-duty robots – not troll-form or at all AI, but robots – that perform some essential maintenance functions, and if they “rampaged”, they could DESTROY the ship.  
Sollux: Not that they ever would, unless someone got them with malware, which no one has.  
Sollux: …Unless you count my backdoor for looking at them, but it’s not like I’m DOING anything to them.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Naspar, are you worried at all you may have boxed yourself in to a job grubsitting eccentric geniuses for the rest of your long life?**

****

****

Naspar: Well… yes, frankly.  
Naspar: But there are a lot of worse jobs.  
Naspar: And the security it provides makes up for a lot of the insanity.  
Callea: He complains, but he loves us really!  
Naspar: …

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Does scavenge have an end goal or he just fucking with people?**

****

****

Aradia: Scavenge’s goal is basically a ghost-based protection racket. Which he has achieved.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: If everyone is making things in honour of the new Mother Grub, does that mean everyone from the chefs to the decorators to the pornographers have to come up with something?**

****

****

Sollux: No.  
Sollux: The Caverns don’t actually have any authority over the Fleet, it just looks bad to come out and contradict them.  
Sollux: Nobody HAS to observe the holiday at all, unless their superior orders them to, but most people are happy to have another holiday.  
Sollux: And from what I’ve seen most people are just planning on… standard partying.  
Sollux: Just some groups want to go that extra step.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Any chance of Briate and Naspar meeting and commiserating on dealing with high maintenance trolls?**

****

****

Briate: It’s really not the same TYPE of high-maintenance trolls, though. I don’t think crazy engineers are that bad, even considering the robots.  
Naspar: …  
Briate: Look, no one is ACTIVELY TRYING to build a killer robot.  
Naspar: I beg to differ.  
Briate: A killer robot to kill PEOPLE.  
Naspar: No, look, I understand you had some destructive stuff going on, too, and the quadrant stuff made everything worse. But I will stand by my assessment that the robots are more trouble.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: We all know the Robot Mother Grub Did Nothing Wrong. We know she's perfect and we love her, but what will become of her after the holiday? Will she get scrapped for parts in some chop shop? Is there a way of getting rid of no longer usable robotic relics with dignity?**

****

****

Naspar: Oh hell I hadn’t even THOUGHT about that.  
Naspar: They’re going to try to use this as a reason to keep the robot Mother Grub in the workblock forever… I just know they are…  
Naspar: Oh, wait. I know. We’ll… ceremonially gift it to… the captain, or someone. Then it’s THEIR problem.  
Naspar: Maybe Commodore Killjoy.  
Naspar: Don’t tell anyone I said that.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: Helmsmen of the ship with the robots: Use the footage as inspiration material for a video game series called five days in the enginihilators cabin, about creepy half done robots coming after you.**

****

****

Domi: This was someone accidentally manually setting off a disintegration ray… the robot itself was mostly inert.  
Domi: Writing games isn’t really my thing, anyway.  
Sollux: Besides, if he did, everyone would think he was ripping off Five Days In Drone Season, where you play a rookie jadeblood operating a drop ship with five malfunctioning bucket drones.  
Oncetold: I hate that game with a PASSION. I have to explain how completely inaccurate its portrayal of the whole process is at least once per Conscription, and I am SICK OF IT.

* * *

**Anonymous asked: So Naspar I heard your team is really bringing down the hive, that they're exploding with potential, that a ceiling fell on you**

****

****

Naspar: *wordless throttling gestures*

* * *

**Anonymous asked: I'd love to see corpsepap finally realizing there's a party going on during day 4**

****

****

Jannin: Well, she… theoretically KNOWS there’s a party going on.  
Jannin: She gave orders for the holiday to be observed.  
Jannin: I… haven’t checked whether she remembers that right now.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> **IMPORTANT NOTE:**
> 
> This was the last POV chapter posted while the main fic was still active. Future POV chapters may contain spoilers for not only 0k **but also the epilogue/futurefic Enlistment** ; I strongly recommend reading that before proceeding further.


	290. ==> BE (SLIGHTLY) FUTURE KARKAT

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: The inner circle finding out that Scanfire's a limeblood?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Reminder, we are entering THE FUTURE!

==> BE KARKAT (seasons in the future, but not many)

When Vriska grabs your arm and starts dragging you off fuck-knows-where, your first suspicion is that someone bribed her to distract you from offering your opinions on the best furniture arrangements in Aradia’s new officeblock. But she just brushes off your accusation to that effect – no dramatic denials, no winking, so you guess she really does want something from you.

“Okay,” she says, when you ask what she DOES want. “So you know how there’s supposed to be a crackdown on unauthorized recreational chemical usage going on?”

“We were both in the dropbox when Terezi explained it.”

“Okay, yeah, but you know how murder recon Sharpwit had an unauthorized lab? Well, she had to shut it down for at least as long as the investigation is here, right? And they were really unhappy about it, especially Scanfire, who I mentioned is sooooo high all the time. But now Scanfire is staying in Sharpwit’s respiteblock, and Sharpwit’s usual roommate has received some kind of toxin and may not live to leave the medicullers.”

“…Do those guys know ANY other strategies?”

“Yeah, exactly, so me and Erithe and Gilyan went there to taunt them about it, right? And then – well – I figured I should ask you–”

She tows you through a wall into a moderately cramped block, then through it to the definitely cramped half-hygieneblock where Gilyan and Probos are watching wide-eyed as Murder Recon 1 (presumably Sharpwit) holds Murder Recon 2 (presumably Scanfire)’s hair back as she vomits into the load gaper.

Both the vomit and the tears leaking down Scanfire’s face are brilliant – LIME – green.

“…Fuck.”


	291. ==> BE FUTURE ARADIA

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Could we see Aradia finding out that the Demoness is her ancestor?

==> BE FUTURE ARADIA

You would really rather be avenging your death right now, but Skeleton seems rather insistent you have this talk. And you’ve told everyone you need to tell in person, so… “Yeah?”

“Obviously you know about ancestors,” Skeleton says. “You have one.”

…Huh. “Is… that why ghost necropaths sometimes get… weird around me?” You noticed, of course. You get SPECIAL HANDLING. You have since you got here. Not always obvious, but it’s there.

“Yes – well, even without it you’re strong enough some people would be weird, but–” Skeleton breaks off, and manifests a paper and pen. “I’m going to write your ancestor’s hatchname. We don’t say it out loud, we don’t write it on anything that’s not going to cease to exist soon. This is how I was told it.”

And Skeleton was told your ancestor’s hatchname because…? But you’re curious, so you wait and read ‘Damara Megido’. Interesting. “Okay, and…?”

“She’s the Demoness.”

The– Holy shit. Well. This explains the caution. You open and close your mouth a few times before managing, “Is she… around much?”

“No. Happily.”

“Okay, I… I need to process this.”

Wow.


	292. ==> BE KARKAT [finding out]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Could we see Karkat finding out his ancestor's identity and past?

==> BE KARKAT

You find out in bits and pieces – cryptic hints from Kanaya here, things overheard from ghost stalkers there, a reluctantly heard ghostghostighostion result over there. Never get detailed in the dropbox, because what if there’s something that detects the words on a screen?

You had an ancestor.

Your ancestor has a cult.

The cult was waiting for a prophesied descendant.

They think you’re going to fix things. Somehow.

When he was alive your ancestor wandered around Alternia preaching about how everything was terrible but it didn’t have to be.

The Empire didn’t take it well.

After he died he was called the Sufferer.

It’s scary. All of it’s scary.


	293. Q&A XII

**what are the quadrants of all of the future incarnations of the main 12 trolls? in your 0k fic**

Hmmm… quadrants can get confusing when there are active ghosts everywhere… and ghosts may or may not feel the quadrant system even applies to them… and probably there are OCs involved who haven’t been introduced… and the ‘future’ covers a very long span during which quadrants didn’t stay static…

So, I’m not going to try to be exhaustive about this, but here are some, focusing on the living people:

-Equius <> Nepeta, obviously   
-Terezi <> Tavros – they’re never as… romantically pale as some relationships, but they work well  
-Sollux <> Aradia  
-Eridan <> Alcyon Soldie while they’re students, then they split up, then they get back together again much later  
-Eridan <3 Nepeta  
-Equius <3 Nissin Komlee, to their mutual bemusement   
-Kanaya <3 another rainbow drinker who’s kind of wild and a bit too into the terrible predator of the day thing and generally worries people, because Kanaya has a type  
-Tavros <3< Aurich Frieas, off and on – it’s not really the best pitchmance since Tavros genuinely doesn’t like Frieas and that never really changes, but there’s some chemistry  
-Eridan <3< Mustel Kellep, in a low-key and exasperation-based way – much later when they’re both widowed, they sometimes flip red  
-Kanaya <3< Maltha Tammas, with too much actual hostility to be a very good idea, especially when Maltha starts enforcing more stringent standards on grubs (and therefore culling more of them) just to piss Kanaya off. It switches to Kanaya c3< Hestai Fialle c3< Maltha Tammas when everyone else can’t stand it any longer.

* * *

**When Equius enlists in the ghost army will he finally be able to shoot a ghost arrow, lacking physical strength?**

Future Equius: …In theory.   
Future Equius: I require… additional practice in remembering that this is the case.

* * *

**Does the Demoness ever pop in and laugh at the ghost army?**

Future Aradia: She has popped in once. At least I think it was her. …All the necropaths thought it was her, SO many people vanished.   
Future Aradia: She started going after one of the live helmsmen.   
Future Aradia: I politely asked her not to.   
Future Aradia: She stared at me for a good minute and a half, and then vanished.

_[Demoness’s deeply repressed uncensored internal monologue: WTF, I didn’t order a descendant, how the fuck am I supposed to react to this?]_

* * *

**Did the TGA ever help Terezi out with other cases? Or give her bodyguards whether she liked it or not, when she worked something particularly dangerous? And did she haunt that guy who murdered her?**

Future Terezi: An army of ghosts can be a VERY useful evidence-gathering and truth-finding resource, once you figure out how to consult it properly.  
Future Terezi: As for bodyguards… WAY too often.  
Future Vriska: Obviously not often enough.  
Future Terezi: The guy who killed me was executed in short order because he did such a terrible terrible coverup – I didn’t have time to get everything figured out first!  
Future Terezi: I did tell his ghost he was an idiot.

* * *

**Skeleton mentioned that dead necropaths who are interested in revolution tend to want to remove the position of Empress altogether. Are there any factions in the TGA who aren't on board with working through / with Pelagi? Are they all satisfied with working under Aradia or are there factions who consider her their ally, but not their leader?**

Future Karkat: There’s been some discussion, about whether replacing a tyrian with a tyrian does any good, but most people aren’t stupid enough to keep thinking all tyrians are the same after getting to know Feferi.  
Future Karkat: Some people are, obviously. But not most people.  
Future Feferi: I think pretty much everyone is on board with the first step being the ascension of an empress who cares about people, isn’t so casteist, and is… more in tune with reality.  
Future Feferi: *What next* is a more challenging question. Reform the Empire, yes, but does that means focusing on rights and quality of life for everyone? Stopping the conquest without getting us conquested back by billions of pissed off aliens? Dismantling the upper power structure?  
Future Karkat: Whatever it is, it looks even less possible if you imagine trying to do it while being attacked by drones and/or Gl’bgolyb.

Future Aradia: I don’t micromanage, especially with how spread out we are now. A lot of decisions are made by other people, or communally.  
Future Aradia: I… am not sure to what extent some of the more spread-out, newer people think I’m the *leader*, or just *the really intimidating necropath who you should probably step carefully around*.  
Future Aradia: Which to be honest feels like it’s my preferred amount of leadership anyway!

* * *

**wait, do murder recon end up knowing about ghost army? does ghost army have a limeblood policy?**

Karkat: We have a limeblood policy, and it is HA HA YOU THINK *THAT’S* UNUSUAL/HERETICAL BLOOD. We officially have no objection to limebloods.

Karkat: …In general. Specific limebloods are case-by-case.

_[As for Team Murder Recon, I’m currently undecided on whether they will find out about the ghost army before becoming ghosts themselves, or what will happen when they do…]_

* * *

**I'm curious about Karkat's ghost cult-- not so much his own feelings on it which are known, but the ghosts' impressions on him and stuff. How do they take his angry lack of acknowledgement? The jade ones trying to destroy the matriorb, what did they think of him wanting the world to NOT end? How is Truepain doing, too? Those converted in life and those converted in death, any difference?**

Truepain: Yeah, that’s… taken some getting used to.   
Truepain: How he wants nothing to do with it, I mean. Some people have been taken aback by the snarliness, but I think most of them realize it would be silly to expect anything else.   
Truepain: But even now, he sees his blood color as neutral and unimportant AT BEST. When he first got here he saw it as an affliction.  
Truepain: …Which you can’t really blame him for, all it ever did for him on Alternia was make him live in fear and die young, but it was still WEIRD.

Feferi: As far as I could tell from the ghostghostighostion and the caverns shenanigans, jadeblood Signlessists are more likely than Fleet Signlessists to be… invested in the end of the world.   
Feferi: I don’t have any solid theories why.   
Feferi: When Karkat started telling everyone not to try to kill the species, a lot of them were willing to take his guidance on faith.   
Feferi: A few of them decided he must have been brainwashed. Or that he was just a fake.

Feferi: Oh, and premortem versus postmortem conversion can make a big difference. Or… alert you to a big difference, I guess.  
Feferi: Someone who was a Signlessist in life was potentially risking EVERYTHING. Even if the only thing they actually did was THINK about Signlessist stuff, there’s psychics. There’s slip-ups. The smart thing to do is forget you ever heard anything, and they didn’t.  
Feferi: So almost all of them believe DEEPLY. Not always in every part of it – a lot of people ignore bits and pieces they don’t like – but there’s some part of it that is CRITICAL to their understanding of… themselves, or the universe, or something.  
Feferi: Which is not to say that no postmortem converts believe deeply! Many of them do.  
Feferi: But it’s also not rare to become a Signlessist while dead because you had a thirty-minute conversation about some part of the philosophy and thought it was cool, or Signlessist ghosts were really nice to you, or someone who annoys you said you better not. You can do it casually.  
Feferi: The divide isn’t quite as sharp in the Caverns, I assume because Signlessism was tacitly allowed as long as everyone maintained plausible deniability.

* * *

**How did the ghostghostighostion turn out? Is Karkat (or for that matter, Kanaya or Nepeta or Sollux) using his status in the Signlessist cult in any way?**

Future Karkat: UGH.   
Future Karkat: Yes.   
Future Karkat: At least, I’ve stopped trying to stop my… position from influencing people.   
Future Karkat: Which… I’ve gotten in arguments over whether I’m taking unfair advantage. They insist I’m not whether or not I feel like a… whatever they think I am.   
Future Karkat: I think Kanaya is in a similar position.   
Future Karkat: Sollux just finds it all annoying and ignores or messes with them.   
Future Karkat: But Nepeta – Nepeta actually finds it really creepy and disturbing, that people have all these ideas about who she’s supposed to be.

* * *

**What does Aradia think of the information that the Demoness is her ancestor?**

Future Aradia: A lot. I have… many thoughts.  
Future Aradia: To start with I’m sort of weirded out that they KNOW the Demoness’s hatchname? She’s a legend of mythical proportions, she’s a force of nature, and we know her HATCHNAME. We’re deliberately making sure people continue to know her hatchname even though we never say it aloud.  
Future Aradia: …And the reason for that might be so they could identify someone like ME.  
Future Aradia: I can’t really complain about it. At least my weird antecedents aren’t written for everyone to see in my blood.  
Future Aradia: What else… hmm, I’m a little annoyed not all the respect I’ve gotten has really been because of me.  
Future Aradia: A little concerned that this may mean I have an above average chance of MEETING the Demoness.  
Future Aradia: It would be really interesting, but – I’m not ready for it yet.  
Future Aradia: Oh, and one more thing.  
Future Aradia: So this is my ancestor.  
Future Aradia: We’re mostly sure HIC is in fact Feferi’s ancestor.  
Future Aradia: We found out about Karkat, Kanaya, Sollux, and Nepeta’s ancestors from the whole Signlessist thing.  
Future Aradia: Vriska knows about hers, and claims her ancestor’s journal revealed Terezi’s, Tavros’s, and probably Eridan’s and Equius’s.  
Future Aradia: So…  
Future Aradia: What about Gamzee?

* * *

**Gamzee finding out/being told who his ancestor is?**

Future Aradia: He has said he doesn’t want to know. So we’re not telling him anything we happen to find out.   
Future Aradia: …There have been a few other Makaras we dug out of the depths of some of the really old archival databases. I say we, I mean one of Sollux’s viruses.   
Future Sollux: Which came back sweeps later, after I was dead.   
Future Aradia: The most likely of those… well, we don’t know for sure, and we’re not going to tell Gamzee.  
Future Aradia: Since Gamzee died so young, they look nothing alike, so even really old ghosts shouldn’t mix them up.

* * *

**Hey Terezi, are there any stories or anything about the Neophyte Redglare among legislacerators?**

Terezi: *SILENT FUMING*  
Skaree: *eyes Terezi warily*  
Skaree: There’s… a story about a Neophyte Redglare that’s supposed to teach us about the dangers of overconfidence. Although I think most people only learn about the dangers of midblue psychics. Pyrope, um…  
Terezi: It’s so unfair! That courtblock setup was not up to her! She wasn’t the one who was calling the shots! How is it overconfidence when you’re pressured into dealing with a high-profile case in a risky way?!  
Skaree: Pyrope seems to take it very personally for some reason.

* * *

**Do the ghosts ever talk about the Summoner?**

Skeleton: More on Alternia than the Fleet, it turns out.  
Skeleton: Which isn’t surprising. The Summoner’s rebellion was a… very planetary thing. It never would have gotten going in space.  
Skeleton: I think once you’ve been in space long enough, those parts of history… stop feeling quite real.

* * *

**Do Nepeta and Karkat know about their ancestors' relationship? What are their thoughts, if they do know?**

Future Karkat: Yes.  
Future Karkat: I’m just… whatever. It’s not any weirder than anything else.  
Future Karkat: And we’re fucking obviously NOT our ancestors.  
Future Karkat: Compared to some people we lucked out in the ancestor draw but that doesn’t mean it MATTERS.  
Future Karkat: …It matters that my ancestor left a cult, that part’s kind of inescapable. Anyway.  
Future Karkat: It bothers Nepeta A LOT.   
Future Equius: Nepeta dislikes… for people to have expectations about how she should feel.  
Future Equius: As I had to learn. Several times.  
Future Karkat: It doesn’t help that at some point someone found out about that old crush, and… blew it out of proportion.  
Future Aradia: Anyone in the terrifying ghost army knows to – well, not to keep their noses out of other people’s relationships, I’m not sure any ghost anywhere knows that, but not to try to stuff their religions into other people’s relationships. But we inevitably sometimes run into Signlessist ghosts who don’t know us.  
Future Karkat: We TRY to tell them to leave Nepeta alone, but they still sometimes get clawed in the face.

* * *

**So does Dualscar have much of a place in history? What does Eridan think of him?**

Eridan: Well, he’s in the Complete Burrek’s SeaRage history of the aristocracy–  
Eridan: Which by the way, SERKET, is NOT also known as Wwho’s Wwho.  
Eridan: So you can find him pretty easily if you go looking for him.   
Eridan: It says he was killed in the process of capturing a notorious pirate.   
Eridan: …  
Eridan: That’s about it for the Fleet. He’s in the… non-Fleet part of history, and his profession isn’t of any interest to the Fleet, even though placating Gl'bgolyb ought to be of interest to everyone. I found better sources on him back on Alternia.  
Eridan: He’s…  
Eridan: The real history isn’t very flattering.   
Eridan: No worse than a million other historical seadwellers… and modern ones… just…  
Eridan: He seemed really cool when I was younger.

* * *

**How does Equius feel about his ancestor?**

Future Equius: …  
Future Equius: Mainly I feel sorry for him.   
Future Equius: He tried to be loyal to too many things, found it impossible, and lost almost all of them.   
Future Equius: That some things are m-more important than r-rules is a difficult lesson but better learned early.

* * *

**Do Kanaya, Sollux and Tavros know much about their ancestors?**

Future Tavros: Ancestors was kind of… a loaded topic for me? For a long time. Because of the whole… Vriska thing, I’m probably one of the ones who is… particularly sensitive about people… conflating them with their ancestors at all.  
Future Tavros: I only really got willing to touch it a while after I died, when I got volunteered to go with Aradia on her Ghost Archaeology vacation to Alternia. And some of the Signlessists know things.  
Future Tavros: There are some very divided opinions on him.  
Future Tavros: Knowing the history did explain a lot about the cavalreapers!

Future Kanaya: I have learned a lot about her over the sweeps, from various sources. She seems to have been an admirable person.

Future Sollux: As little as I can manage, which is still more than I’d like.   
Future Sollux: …  
Future Sollux: Sure he’s this great ~friend and comrade~ of the Signless, but outside of the apocryphal stories people tell for fun no one ever talks about anything he DID other than get helmed to the Battleship Condescension afterwards, and…  
Future Sollux: There’s some… helmsman legends about the Battleship Condescension, and…  
Future Sollux: I don’t want to bring the two together.

* * *

**Did anyone, in any of your fics, ever consider convincing Tavro to use his powers to tame Vriska's lusus?**

Terezi: Considering that any LONG-TERM control would require either constant psychic overextension or moving into Vriska’s hive… no.

* * *

**question for 0k ghost equius: You didn't live a full life but I'm presuming as an indigo you still lived fairly long, right? Did you end up getting far enough in your career to build drones? If so, did you have any moral qualms about what they ended being used for?**

Future Equius: I did do some drone work. Nothing particularly innovative.  
Future Equius: I prefer prosthetic design, or even recreational robots.   
Future Equius: But I do not feel guilty.   
Future Equius: I did nothing that could or would not have been done by someone else in my absence.   
Future Equius: And the entire Fleet is…  
Future Equius: There is no role you can fulfill in the Fleet that does not in some way contribute to the operation of the Fleet. And the Fleet operates to destroy things.   
Future Equius: …  
Future Equius: That said it appears the suspicions I ignored were correct, and Callea’s ‘new and improved’ blood color remote identification mechanism for drones, now commonly included in new drones, gives wildly inconsistent results when used on pre-adults.   
Future Equius: I am not sure how long it is going to take someone in authority to notice that.   
Future Equius: It has been over a hundred sweeps already.

Future Ghost Gathay Callea: It also gets weird when exposed to certain kinds of solar radiation OR fungal spores!  
Future Ghost Gathay Callea: I had to spend so much time studying biology and physics and chemistry on the side, it was insane, those drones do so many weird things on Alternia and NONE of them out in space.  
Future Ghost Gathay Callea: Truly my masterwork.  
Future Ghost Gathay Callea: Don’t blame Zahhak, though. He doesn’t really have the right mindset for… outside the box approaches? And he had that midblood moirail to worry about.  
Future Ghost Gathay Callea: *goes back to trying to construct ghost robots with ghost disintegration rays, to the concern of the rest of the terrifying ghost army*

* * *

**To the jades who handle grubs: what have been the most interesting/unusual grubs you've ever handled?**

Perses: I’m not going to ask Maltha, she’d just say something about identifying ~incorrect~ blood colors and culling them.   
Perses: Or identifying physical abnormalities and culling them.  
Perses: …Whereas with me it’s mostly noticing things which might be abnormal and then un-noticing them so I don’t have to do anything about them.   
Perses: There was a grub with five eyes last sweep. I don’t know whether it made it through the Trials.   
Perses: There was one, though, that tried to steal my palmhusk when I dropped it and I swear it was trying to use it. Not very well, but hey, it didn’t have any hands.   
Perses: I skipped it past the Trials. Even though it had slobbered all over my palmhusk.

Surewait: *cough*

* * *

**What happened to palmhusk grub?**

Perses: Out there somewhere with a lusus, hopefully. This wasn’t all that long ago – I haven’t been here THAT long. I think if it’s alive it’s… two sweeps old, maybe?

* * *

**Jades, have any of you ever had to cull a grub you didn't want to cull?**

Maltha: I’m not even going to ask Perses, she never wants to cull anything because she’s allergic to doing anything productive.   
Maltha: And I have. When we’re running too high a proportion of some caste, we may have to thin the grubs out. I prefer to select imperfect specimens, but there aren’t always enough. Sometimes we have to cull perfectly acceptable grubs just because there happen to be too many of their blood color, and it GRATES.

Surewait: Not often, as a full Ancillar – I can usually find some way to argue it’s not needed.   
Surewait: When I was a novice my supervisor was… closer to Maltha’s philosophy. It was… stressful.

* * *

**Can you tell us more about what Skaree and her quadrants have been up to? She's in the TGA now, right?**

Future Ghost Skaree: Well, after I got past the surprise of apparently never knowing my own moirail’s religion…  
Future Ghost Turtur: I just didn’t want to put you in a difficult position!!  
Future Ghost Skaree: We’ve been doing some traveling. Gathering data on other squadrons, mostly.   
Future Ghost Skaree: And I’ve gone back to Alternia for some flying, too.

* * *

**Nepeta and Eridan: How did you finally confess your genuine red feelings to one another?**

Future Eridan: By private message, since there was too much of a risk of being overheard in person.  
Future Eridan: …As it turned out, about three and a half days after she’d heard a rumor I was going to.   
Future Eridan: GHOSTS.

Future Nepeta: I didn’t have to be sneaky about it, since the story we established had me being hard to get.  
Future Nepeta: So I sent him a heart in olive and violet ribbons.   
Future Nepeta: –And in a plastic bag, I know he doesn’t like his stuff getting dripped on. :33  
Future Nepeta: I don’t think he ever ate it, but I don’t mind.

Future Feferi: Really the whole exchange made me more confident about the whole thing.   
Future Feferi: I mean, it confirmed they both had to know what they were getting into.

 

Future Icthee: *disgusted staring*  
Future Mollym: *sulking*  
Future Alcyon: *moping*  
Future Mustel: *reminding himself to buy his moirail more air fresheners to mask the scent of blood*

* * *

**Considering Kanaya lives long enough to get Eridan a heads up on a new heiress, does she live long enough to encounter grubs that are her friends descendants?**

Future Kanaya: I don’t have a lot of interaction with grubs.   
Future Kanaya: And it would be difficult to identify a descendant AS a grub.  
Future Kanaya: And not everyone is sure to have a descendant at all.  
Future Kanaya: That said, there is a Mellis Nitram in the computer, same sign, with a fairy bull lusus.   
Future Kanaya: I’m not sure how much she looks like Tavros.

* * *

**Do Equius and Komlee make each other robots as romantic gifts?**

Future Nepeta: No, but they do robot-building dates.

* * *

**does feferi haunt the new heiress**

Future Karkat: If by ‘haunt’ you mean ‘more or less move into her hive and take over responsibility for her education and non-horrorterror socialization’, then yes.

* * *

**If some ghosts can become powerful enough to be able to manifest without a necropath helping, why has nobody done that for Graywire so the whole Corpsepap thing is slightly less embarrassing for all involved?**

Aradia: …  
Aradia: And that’s why I’m stuck on Corpsepap duty for the foreseeable future, DAMMIT.

* * *

**So, did Awwakk ever realise/admit that what she did to Hesten was wrong? Did Hesten ever find closure about it?**

Future Hesten: Well… eventually someone – an older cadet – told her to her face that no one wanted to date her because her matesprit jumped in front of a rocket launcher to get away from her.  
Future Hesten: Then she couldn’t find anyone who would say they disagreed with the assessment.  
Future Hesten: So she thought about it for a while, and eventually decided that yes, I really had wanted out of the relationship THAT badly, and she had all the evidence to figure that out much, much sooner.  
Future Hesten: So she felt stupid about it, at least.  
Future Hesten: And admitted we’d both have been better off if we’d broken up at Conscription, and she wishes we hed.  
Future Hesten: Of course then she went on to say it’s not her fault I, what was it, “Forgot all the patience he was always bragging about and decided he’d rather die than push through it”.  
Future Hesten: …  
Future Hesten: It came at a good time for me, though, because I’d started kicking myself over giving up when other people survived worse for longer, but as soon as SHE said it, well, FUCK her.

* * *

**Did Soldie and Arvaat ever get to talk to each other again?**

Slightly Future Perses: Arvaat had the most RIDICULOUS data package to send to her matesprit with the official data transfer. I think she’d recorded like, an hour of video a day. Even compressed she was right up against her data limit.  
Slightly Future Perses: And then she got just as much back! BADLY compressed, because I guess seadwellers don’t need to do things well if they don’t want to.

* * *

**Is it awkward whenever any of the main 12 die and they meet ghosts who, due to ghost bodyguarding/spying know a fuckload more about them than is probably socially appropriate for a first meeting?**

Future Terezi: It’s not really a first meeting, with the bodyguards – anyone who was going to be around a LOT got introduced, usually.   
Future Terezi: And a lot of the awkwardness comes earlier, just because you know you might be being watched.   
Future Terezi: See the infamous ‘But Sometimes People Get Murdered In Showers’ debate.

* * *

**Was the "But Sometimes People Get Murdered In Showers" debate strictly ghost vs living, or were there living people on both sides?**

Future Terezi: There were several people who repeatedly switched sides depending on whether THEIR showers were currently under discussion.

* * *

**Could a necropath force a ghost to remain a ghost? And not, like, move on to wherever they're supposed to go?**

Aradia: Well… um, yes.   
Aradia: Not that we KNOW where ghosts go, or how accurate it is to say they’re ‘supposed’ to go anywhere, but yeah, a strong enough necropath can keep a ghost around against its will.

* * *

**Has a necropath ever forced a ghost to stay against their will? Like in a fucked up corpsepap situation?**

Skeleton: Yes.  
Skeleton: Some people really can’t be trusted with any kind of power.  
Skeleton: Anyone doing something generally seen as ‘creepy’ tends to get smacked down for it sooner or later, by the ghost necropath… community, such as it is.

* * *

**Are there any necropaths who went rogue in some way and for whatever reason wound up as enemies of the Fleet?**

Skeleton: Historically, sure.   
Skeleton: Necropaths are as prone to… okay, maybe slightly less prone to mutiny than other lowbloods, since we have more ways to subvert the rules, but whenever there’s a sufficiently large… mixup involving lowbloods there’s likely a necropath in there somewhere.   
Skeleton: Currently alive and active, not that I know of.]

* * *

**So... *can* ghosts have sex?**

Skeleton: Yes, but not easily, is the short answer.  
Skeleton: It doesn’t come naturally. And since a ghost’s ‘body’ depends largely on their conceptualization of it, and any loss of concentration can lead to reverting to whatever their default is… It’s an artificial and difficult thing to do.  
Skeleton: But of course lots of ghosts don’t let that stop them.

* * *

**Anyone ever try to make and market ghost porn?**

Skeleton: Until EXTREMELY recently, there was no such thing as a ghost recording device.

* * *

**Has Vriska met any of ghosts of the people she fed to her lusus?**

Vriska: You mean as a ghost myself? No. I assume they’re all still on Alternia and I definitely didn’t go looking for them.   
Vriska: I… sort of met some when Aradia called a bunch of them up during the revenge… thing.

* * *

**Future Pelagi: Belatedly realise that having dozens of ghost friends of varying castes, some of whom didn't die on Alternia, is not the norm**

Future Pelagi: Don’t be silly, I’ve always known it isn’t normal.   
Future Pelagi: …Though I’m not sure it sank in until I tried to introduce the ghosts to a few people.


	294. ==> BE FUTURE ARADIA [taking command]

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Aradia: Lead your ghost army in person after death

==> BE FUTURE ARADIA

When the excitement has died down and what’s left of the Gleeful Abandon has been evacuated, you call a meeting in your office. Your former office? It hasn’t been reassigned, call it your office. Obviously the entire ghost army doesn’t come – the entire ghost army wouldn’t FIT – but most of the old guard is there.

Feferi still looks a little sheepish about the SCALE of the destruction, while Vriska is still riding the high of it. Gamzee is staring into space, fiddling with his guitar. Karkat is at one of the ghost computer terminals, messaging Sollux, you know.

“No Alesse?” you ask, surveying the block.

“I think she’s off spying on squadron leadership to see how they react to – uh – all that,” Camieo offers. “And Panthe got a psychic backlash headache, so he’s resting.”

Several people are looking at their ghost palmhusks rather than you, possibly checking in with other ghosts but probably playing the text adventure game that launched a few weeks ago.

“Okay!” you say, figuring this is about as good as it’s likely to get. “So. Personal command of the Terrifying Ghost Army! Wasn’t expecting it just now, but it’s been coming. I’m not anticipating making any major changes–”

The door opens.

“Holy SHIT,” says Horrat Kadmar, rookie necropath.

Slightly less rookie necropath Ofelle Loppin kicks him in the ankle. “…Hi, ma'am. Cryptrix. Sorry to interrupt. We just got sent to, uh, clear out the block, if you know when you’re going to be done…”


	295. ==> BE THE FUTURE DEMONESS

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Demoness, see your adorable descendant

==> BE FUTURE DEMONESS

Another sweep, another squadron, another integrated helmsman who could do something interesting with the failsafes burned out and some pressure on the brain–

“Excuse me?”

Who DARES–

“I’m not trying to spoil your sabotage fun, not my business, but Bru really has plenty of headaches as it is, so would you mind leaving him out of it?”

That.

That is.

That looks like.

There’s.

“Obviously there are plenty of other systems to go after, or if you have your heart set on the main energy core the squadron has some non-helmed ships I could point you at?”

That’s.

The FUCK.

“Uh… goodbye, I guess?”

Since WHEN. Do you have. A DESCENDANT?!?!?!


	296. ==> BE PAST PERSES

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Prompt: Can we get a brief pov from whichever 0k oc you liked best?
> 
> Response: That is an impossible question, but, since it was received while I was messing around on my phone at work:

==> BE PAST PERSES

You hate grubs.

You weren’t very keen on them when they gave you this stupid assignment a season ago and your opinion has not improved. And NO, that doesn’t mean you WANT to cull them. Even if you hadn’t stabbed yourself in the foot with a bident. (Supposedly it’s totally recovered, but it still hurts.)

Ugh.

And you’re bored.

Why are you even here. WHO CARES.

You fail to stop your hand from creeping towards your pocket and your phone. You’ll just… take a quick look at those articles you pulled off the grubnet.

Just the highlights.


	297. 'Turn left' scenarios

**0k, Gamzee doesn't die in subjugglator training?**

Let’s see, there’s (at least) two ways to go with this…

1\. Gamzee is still alive on the Gleeful Abandon when Sollux looks him up in Chapter 5. Hmm… they pick up very quickly that the Gleeful Abandon is a Very Bad ship to be on, though they don’t get all the details immediately… Rigorous subjugglator novice training might include some degree of isolation, but if he’s been dumped on the Gleeful Abandon he’s probably not getting the scrupulous approach, so he probably has computer access if he thinks to use it. So, step one would probably be Sollux attempting to remotely get his attention without attracting anyone else’s attention. Contact-via-ghost wouldn’t be plausible at that point unless Aradia could convince Skeleton or another ghost necropath to help.

Once they get in contact – or even before that – they’d be trying to work out how to get him off the ship. 

…Okay I SWEAR I had something somewhere in the Q&A about Gamzee almost getting recruited to be used in an example in PSAs about sopor abuse but now I can’t find it.

ANYWAY. Since they lack many resources this early on, Gamzee’s situation is so dire, and a purple isn’t as likely to be killed just for being in an unexpected place, I think they’d end up with Sollux sneaking a transfer order in to get Gamzee off the ship. This would at least buy some time. It could buy a LOT of time, if they just kept him moving too much for anyone to decide he was their problem. So quite possibly Gamzee spends the next several dozen chapters going from ship to ship to ship to ship, HOPEFULLY not right into the path of various other hazards they don’t know about yet, e.g. Overbear.

…If the timeline wanted to correct itself by killing Gamzee, that would be an easy way to do it: he decides since he’s on the Brutal Domination anyway (for the day) he’ll try to intervene to protect Equius, and it turns out badly.

Assuming he makes it through to Chapter 50 or 60… I think there is an nonzero chance Eridan gets to develop a new pitchcrush!

Although hopefully at some point in there Aradia sees him in person and, you know, detaches the ghost he’s got stuck to him.

2\. He gets sent to the Mirthful Maturation instead of the Gleeful Abandon. This makes the situation when discovered an order of magnitude less critical, but still not GOOD – subjugglator training isn’t NICE even when it’s nonlethal, and Gamzee still has a very unhappy ghost stuck to him. Also, it’d be harder to get him out of there without someone taking notice.

He probably ends up as “Eridan’s new pitchcrush” again, still about Chapter 50 or 60 – assuming he hasn’t been ordered to do something he couldn’t bring himself to do in the meantime.

In either case, not having Ghost!Gamzee for the Caverns trip doesn’t cause any major problems, but it does result in Karkat being more harassed by Signlessist ghosts that Gamzee would have accidentally scared away.

* * *

**Turn left: 0k: Aradia becomes a helmsman instead of getting put in necropath duty**

Well that DOES derail everything…

She could still get Karkat’s ghost off Alternia, but I’m not sure about Feferi. She’d have to find out that Heiresses get dispelled, and know just when to call the ghost… Well, I would be the one writing it, so even though it’s not the most plausible route I’d say she and Sollux are sitting around the same room getting vaccinations and allergy tests during the Challenge, so he can tip her off. So both Karkat and Feferi make it off planet and have a profoundly unnerving several weeks.

After that – well, a lot of the necropath things Aradia can do, she doesn’t need to be in Retermination to do. Sollux already set up the dropbox and ensures both he and Aradia have unlimited internet access. Terezi gets brought in more or less as before. Tavros may take longer to contact any of them, since someone will probably have to tell him Aradia is still contactable. Lacking the necropath contact with the medicullers, they’d have to find some other way to give them the idea of transferring Tavros, but they’d come up with something.

Karkat and Feferi wouldn’t be able to tag along for intership travel, they’d have to find their own way – something most of the ghosts weren’t regularly doing until a while later. I think going to stalk Overbear was the first Aradia-independent intership jaunt? So it’d be a little trickier getting to Sollux in person, but doable. Gleeful Abandon would be even trickier.

Since they can’t bring a live person, both Karkat and Feferi go to look for Gamzee, things are rather trying, and there are a few lapses in appearance control leading to a SPECTACULAR GHOST RIOT. Like, non-negligible structural damage to the ship spectacular. Aradia manages to pull Karkat and Feferi (and Gamzee and Perlen, and let’s say Caterpillar too) out remotely, but it’s SUCH a mess. It’s also harder to disentangle Gamzee and Perlen without any free hands, but it’s not like there’s actual physical interaction involved so she manages it eventually.

So we’ve got Karkat and Feferi and Gamzee (and Perlen and Caterpillar), and soon enough an increasing number of Overbear victims because that’s playing out pretty much as before, but instead of Bureau of Retermination HQ, the nascent terrifying ghost army is assembling in Aradia’s helmsblock. The necropath assigned to go clear it out identifies that all these ghosts are tied to the helmstroll, who is also a necropath, and in fact a QUITE STRONG necropath, and so it is that Skeleton finds out about helmed necropath Aradia MEGIDO and contemplates fleeing the squadron.

* * *

**For turn left, what if overbear had managed to win his case?**

I’m not sure how much the accused winning cases is a thing in troll court…

At any rate, if it got as far as the courtblock, it is entirely possible that he would STILL have been torn apart by a hundred-some angry ghosts. They were pretty worked up by then.


End file.
